Whispering Waves

by Jamie Berris

  “You care because you love her and don’t want your sister to get hurt, plain and simple, Sadie.”

  “She yelled in my face to stop acting like her mother, and I know she’s right.”

  “You would protect your sister whether your mom was alive or not, Sadie. You were only doing what you thought was right, and it was. Don’t be so hard on yourself.”

  Sadie needed to hear these words from Andrea, from an adult. It was hard explaining these things to Myla and Kyla. They compared Sadie’s scenarios to fights they had with their siblings, which was fine, but it was different—they weren’t responsible for their siblings.

  Jayna and Nicholas were Sadie’s responsibility; her mom had told her to take good care of them. Keeping them alive was a big part of that, especially since their dad was so oblivious to most of the crap Jayna pulled.

  Sadie had never been one to run to their parents to tattle on Jayna, even when they were little, and she wasn’t ready to start now. Besides, what would Kurt do? Ground her? That would only backfire in Sadie’s face because she would be the one in charge of making sure Jayna obeyed the terms every day while he was at work.

  Sadie was feeling better. The ibuprofen, water, fresh air, and Andrea were helping. They picked up their pace and chatted easily. Sadie pictured her mom and Andrea out there walking and talking about their lives and families. She wondered what her mom vented to Andrea about. Her kids? Her husband? Marissa?

  Taking in the familiar view of sandy dunes and occasional homes and cottages put Sadie at ease. She was always at peace here. The sun beating down on her back, along with the lull of waves, made everything in life seem a little easier. Times like this she wished summer would stick around all year long and they never had to leave. Sadie dreamed of being a recluse, being homeschooled on the beach.

  Sadie was considering talking to Andrea about Marissa, but she didn’t know how to bring it up, and she didn’t know if it was even worth it. The text from Paige was still eating away at her. Would Marissa seriously dare show up in Pentwater? It had been years since their families vacationed in Pentwater together.

  What the heck? She couldn’t hold her tongue any longer. “Do you remember Mom’s friend, Marissa Jenkins? They used to rent the cottage with us?”

  “Sure, I remember. We used to have some great times out here. We talked a bit at your mom’s funeral.”

  “She and Marcus are divorced now. You knew Mom and Marissa had a huge falling out, right?” Sadie didn’t wait for Andrea to respond. “Well, of course you did; that’s why they stopped coming here with us. Did Mom ever mention to you what it was about?”

  Andrea was silent for what seemed like several minutes. “Lydia did talk with me about it, but Sadie . . .” Andrea inhaled deeply. “Sadie, it’s complicated and really not my place to comment on anything.”

  Sadie was now aware of one thing her mom and Andrea talked about on their walks. “You do know they reconciled when Mom was sick, don’t you?”

  “Yes, your mom told me that.”

  “So what’s the big deal then?” Sadie heard that snotty tone in her voice and hoped Andrea didn’t catch onto it. She didn’t mean to be rude. “I mean . . . what could have happened that was so bad it had to be kept a secret from me? I’m her daughter and she’s dead.”

  “Can I ask why it’s so important for you to know?”

  Sadie bit her lip. Maybe she should have kept her mouth shut after all. Was it worth telling Andrea and getting herself all worked up?

  “Dad and Marissa are secretly dating—that’s why I want to know.”

  Andrea stopped dead in her tracks. Sadie was a few feet ahead of her before she realized it and stopped to see her standing there, dumbfounded.

  “What did you say?”

  “Dad and Marissa have been talking and dating for the entire summer—ever since last spring, actually. They started getting cozy during tennis season. I don’t know how often they see each other. He’s never let on to the fact that he goes out with her, but I have my sources, and I know they date. I’ve also seen some of the text messages from her on his phone. In fact, I’m waiting for her to show up here.”

  Andrea looked at Sadie, stunned.

  “Are you sure about this, Sadie, or are you just suspicious? Maybe they’ve met a few times to talk. Maybe it’s strictly platonic. I mean your mom and Marissa were lifelong friends.”

  “I wish. Believe me. I wish. Paige, Marissa’s daughter, and I have been keeping a close eye on them. They’re spending more and more time together, and yes, they’re affectionate.”

  They started walking again, slowly. Sadie’s mind was racing, and from the look on Andrea’s face, she was shocked. Was it just because Lydia and Marissa used to be best friends, or was the look of shock because of what happened between the two of them?

  “I can’t believe it,” said Andrea.

  Sadie got the feeling that Andrea hadn’t meant to say that out loud. “Neither can I, so now are you going to tell me what happened?”

  “Sadie, I really can’t, not now at least. I can’t disrespect your father like that. And Lydia, I . . .” Andrea was definitely lost for words. “Oh Sadie.” She touched Sadie’s arm.

  “What, Andrea? What could be so bad?”

  Andrea looked away from Sadie. “It’s not my business, Sadie, you have to understand that. It’s simply not my place to say anything.”

  “But I’m asking you to.”

  “I can’t, Sadie. I just can’t.”

  Chapter 21

  Sadie

  Jayna waltzed down the beach from Liz’s cottage just in time for lunch. Sadie didn’t even bother to look at Jayna as she stomped up the porch steps and sat as far away as she could get on the picnic table. Kurt smiled and kissed her head and offered to make her a roast beef sandwich. Jayna said she hated roast beef and dug her hand in the bag of Chex mix.

  “How about turkey and provolone then,” Kurt suggested, always kissing Jayna’s butt and not wanting to get on her moody side.

  “Whatever, I want lemonade too.”

  “Sure, sweetie.”

  Jayna glanced Sadie’s way with daggers shooting out of her eyes. Sadie shot hers right back. For a minute, Sadie seriously considered apologizing to her for overreacting last night. Forget it. With the way Jayna acted, she didn’t deserve an apology—she seriously had issues.

  Kurt walked into the cottage to get Princess Jayna a glass of lemonade, and Sadie could tell Jayna was nervous sitting across from her at the picnic table. Nicholas was too busy sticking his carrot sticks in his sandwich to even notice anyone else was present.

  “I wasn’t planning on saying anything to Dad about last night, but if you’re going to act like such a little snot, I have no problem slipping.”

  “You would, Sadie. Actually, I can’t believe you didn’t run home and tell him last night—anything to make you look like the good girl, always high and mighty and in charge.”

  “Yeah, because that’s me. I’m always running to Dad and tattling on you. I usually do it in the spare time I have between doing your laundry, driving you to Chrissie’s house, making your meals, and covering for you when Dad calls home from work to check on us and you’ve taken off on your bike for the day without bothering to tell anyone where you’re going.”

  “You always have to bring that stuff up. What does jumping off the pier have to do with how much I help around the house? You complain about everything.”

  Okay, Jayna had a good point. It didn’t exactly have anything to do with it, and every time they fought, Sadie did bring up what a slacker Jayna was.

  “Ya know, Jayna, I’m sick of having to take care of you. When are you going to grow up? Jeez, Jayna, you can’t even make your own sandwich!”

  Kurt walked out with a pitcher of lemonade and seemed to feel the tension in the air between his daughters. So he did what he always did, ignored it, and tried to lighten the mood by offering to do something fun as a family. “Anybody want to go fishin
g after lunch?”

  “I do. I do!” screamed Nicholas, jumping up and down, raising his hand.

  “Sadie? Jayna?” asked Kurt.

  Jayna shook her head no. “Liz and I are going to lie in the sun with some friends down by the pavilion, but thanks, maybe tomorrow.”

  Sadie couldn’t believe her ears. Was Jayna being polite?

  “I think I’ll just hang out here today with Travis and Cody. I might try skim boarding. You two boys can bring us home some fish for dinner.” Sadie squeezed Nicholas’s shoulder.

  “You hate fish, Sadie,” said Nicholas, looking concerned.

  “I like fish, just nothing that swims in Lake Michigan. Why don’t you throw them back in and let them live with their fish families, okay, champ?”

  Nicholas nodded and Sadie felt bad for bickering with Jayna in front of him. He didn’t need to hear it. Who was she kidding? He heard everything and pretended he didn’t. She probably warped the kid for life.

  After Kurt and Nicholas left, Sadie went up to change into her swimsuit. She chose the baby blue and brown Roxy bikini, the one her dad said looked as if it was missing some thread. She hoped she wouldn’t lose her suit while falling on her face skim boarding.

  Jayna was already in the room, digging through her laundry basket of clothes, holding up different suits. Sadie was irritated that she couldn’t just throw her clothes in the drawers or put the laundry basket in the closet so they wouldn’t have to trip on it for two weeks. Sadie held her tongue, though, and said nothing as she stepped over Jayna’s pile and changed.

  Jayna dipped her head. “Hey, if you want to hang out at the pavilion with us, you can. I was thinking of buying a blue raspberry slushy. I mean . . . I know they’re your favorite. If you want your own, I’ll buy you one too.”

  Sadie was caught completely off guard. She wanted to tell Jayna off, but knew this was Jayna’s way of apologizing, so she had to practice what she preached and act maturely. “I’m looking forward to skim boarding, but maybe after a while I’ll walk down and you can buy me a slushy.”

  “Okay, see ya later.” Jayna threw her sunscreen in her bag and left the room quickly.

  Sadie sang Katy Perry’s “Hot and Cold” under her breath as Jayna left. She had always thought the song was written for her sister.

  As she dug through her drawer trying to find her Roxy swim cover up, she received another Bitmoji from Travis. She was instantly flattered. Wanna Hang, was above Travis in a hammock, holding a drink in a coconut with a cute umbrella in it.

  After hitting send, Sadie wondered if her response was borderline desperate. Her Bitmoji was her cartoon self, running, and read, On My Way!

  Chapter 22

  Sadie

  Sadie knew her way around the tennis court, but when it came to skim boarding, she was very much an amateur. It didn’t help that she felt like Travis was totally checking her out. Here she was again, confused, because as much as she doubted herself, she very much liked the attention from him.

  She had talked to Dylan earlier, and because of work, he couldn’t come for a visit for two more days. Sadie was excited to see him and missed him, so how could she be so flattered by Travis?

  Sadie ran, threw the skim board down, and hopped on, skimming across the shore with ease.

  “Now that’s my girl—that’s how you do it!” yelled Travis, running up to Sadie to give her a high five.

  Cody smirked. “She’s better than you, dude.” He threw his board down, ran, hopped on, and sailed by.

  “I’m tired,” said Sadie, handing the board back to Travis. “I’m going to sit in the beach chair for a while.”

  “I don’t think so,” he argued. “You’re on fire. Keep practicing.” Travis got close to Sadie’s face and playfully shoved the board back in her hands.

  Sadie swatted Travis on the butt with the board. “Get out of my way, then.” She perfected another run, knowing all too well she was acting like a tease. When she stood up with the board, she had to take a second glance. Dylan was walking in the sand toward her. Holy shit, he obviously just saw the exchange between her and Travis because he did not look happy.

  Sadie swallowed hard as she started jogging up the sand to meet Dylan. She wanted to keep him as far away from Travis as she could, even if it were only twenty feet. She still had the board in her hand and could feel both Travis’s and Cody’s eyes on her back. Three pairs of guy eyes, how nerve-wracking!

  “Hey, what are you doing here?” asked Sadie, leaning in to give Dylan a kiss. His jaw was clenched, and although he kissed her back, his attention was not on her.

  “Ends up I got the afternoon off of work, so I thought I would surprise you, but it looks like you’re having too much fun with your new buddies to care.”

  Dylan’s voice was cool to say the least, and Sadie didn’t blame him. He looked over Sadie’s shoulder to the shore and nodded to Travis and Cody, but hardly in a friendly way. It was the upward chin nod, the arrogant, bad-ass nod Sadie so hated from boys. They all did it to act tough and cool, and she thought it was so annoyingly rude.

  “Travis and Cody are teaching me how to skim board. I’m getting pretty good—can’t wait for you to watch me,” she said flirtatiously, trying to make light of the situation. Sadie hugged him and whispered in his ear, “I’ve missed you,” and planted another kiss on him. It was a tasteful kiss, nothing inappropriate. Not only did she feel uncomfortable in front of Travis and Cody, but Benton and Andrea were also on the beach in front of their cottage, pretending to read their books but obviously peering her way.

  “I’ll introduce you and then we can take a walk.” Sadie headed towards Travis and Cody, and Dylan followed. The tension between Dylan and Travis was thick, but thank God for Cody. He instantly started talking football with Dylan. As soon as Cody gave Dylan a “Congrats” for winning the state championship last fall (his senior year), Dylan loosened up. Travis even piped up, and soon, all three of them were talking high school teams and scores.

  Thankfully, Travis and Cody lived in a district about forty minutes away, and the schools weren’t in the same class, so they didn’t play each other. The tension was still present, but had eased somewhat in the uncomfortable ten minutes the guys had been talking.

  A few minutes into the conversation Sadie felt Dylan take her hand and pull her close to him. She felt warm and loved by his touch, but at the same time, she couldn’t help but wonder if he was holding her hand out of pure love, or if it was to show some sort of ownership over her. She felt a tad embarrassed and awkward in front of Travis.

  There was a pause in the conversation, so Sadie gave Dylan’s hand a tug and suggested a walk. As they strolled away, she had the biggest urge to turn around and look over her shoulder to see if Travis was watching her. Why was she feeling like this? And what was it exactly? Guilt? Pity? It wasn’t as if there was anything between her and Travis anyway. And Dylan was the one she loved.

  Hand in hand they walked past the public beach and saw Jayna out in the water, playing Frisbee with Liz and several other kids her age. It was obviously the same group of kids from the pier that Sadie made a scene in front of and didn’t really want to confront.

  It felt like all of a sudden she had a lot she didn’t want to confront—the strange feelings about Travis, her dad and Marissa, even the secret as to why her mother and Marissa had their falling out—all this on top of dealing with Jayna. Why couldn’t she escape from all these issues bogging her down? It always seemed like there was something. She was a teenager—wasn’t her life supposed to be carefree?

  Dylan brought Sadie’s hand up to his mouth and kissed it. “Why are you so quiet? Are you pissed that I showed up here?”

  Dylan didn’t sound cocky, which surprised Sadie. He seemed more scared, almost the way she had heard girls her age talk to their boyfriends. Girls were always so jealous and afraid of getting dumped for another girl. Sadie felt bad; she didn’t want to make Dylan feel like that. She realized his tough guy act was
just that—an act!

  She brought his hand to her lips and kissed it. “This was the best surprise ever. I thought you were working at the golf course today, so I was a little shocked is all.”

  “My dad gave me the afternoon off. Of course, I’m sure I’ll be working overtime the next couple of days to make up for it. You still seem kinda off though . . .”

  “I got a text from Paige, saying Marissa was planning to visit here. It’s really bugging me, my dad hasn’t said a word, and I don’t think this is the place for her to come and expose their relationship to everyone. This place was sacred to my mom, my family. Not to mention our families vacationed here before Marissa cut my mom off.”

  They stepped onto the pier and felt a light breeze off the water. The air was incredibly humid and thick. “If I’d known, Marissa and I could have carpooled.” Dylan tried to make light of the situation, and Sadie just glared at him. “I’m kidding. Why don’t you confront your dad, Sadie? Tell him you’re not comfortable with her coming here.”

  “It’s not that easy, Dylan. First, I know I would start to cry if I brought it up, and second, I know I would start yelling—we’d just end up in a huge fight. It’s not like we haven’t fought about it already.”

  Sadie told Dylan about the conversation she had with Andrea. She explained Andrea’s stunned reaction to the two of them dating and about how Andrea wouldn’t spill a word about the fight between her mom and Marissa.

  Dylan was a good listener while Sadie vented, and she was feeling better just getting her troubles off her back. They sat down at the end of the pier and watched the waves splash over the rocks, the boats come and go, and people fish.

  Dylan offered to talk to her dad for her, acting as if Sadie didn’t know what he was up to. Sadie turned his offer down, but was touched by his concern. How many boyfriends would put up with hearing all these family sagas all the time? Suddenly, she was feeling closer to Dylan than she had in weeks. All her worries about him going off to college and falling out of love with her melted away. He obviously really loved her.