by Anne Douglas
‘Suppose I’ll have to ask why,’ Jess said with a resigned smile. ‘As though you’re no’ going to tell me.’
‘Well, one minute you’re down, looking as though the roof’s fallen in, and I think, oh, she’s depressed about the Princes. The next, you’re on top of the world, smiling and blushing, like somebody seventeen, and I don’t know what to think.’ Sally finished her coffee. ‘Or maybe I do. Is it something to do with Ben, dear?’
‘Ben?’ Whether or not Jess was like somebody seventeen, she was certainly blushing. ‘How d’you mean?’
‘Well, he seems to be hanging around you more than he used to. Is there something going on?’
‘Sally, I don’t know if I can talk about it,’ Jess began, then shook her head. ‘Oh, why don’t I just admit it? It’s all wrong, I know, but it’s happened. Somehow or other, we seem to be in love.’
Sally stared, then gave a little whistle.
‘Oh dear,’ she whispered. ‘Oh dear, Jess. What a situation, eh? He’s no’ divorced yet, you’ve still got Rusty. What are you hoping to do?’
‘I don’t know.’
‘What about Rusty, then? Is it all over with him? I’d be sorry. He’s a dear, sweet lad.’
‘He has his problems,’ Jess said stiffly.
‘I know, dear, I know. And I always used to think you were keen on Ben.’
‘That was a long time ago. We’re both different people now.’
‘I’m sure,’ Sally murmured.
‘And the thing is, Ben might be moving to Glasgow, if he gets this job he’s in for. I don’t know if that would make the situation any easier.’
‘Don’t think so.’ Sally was shaking her head. ‘Seeing as you can’t marry him anyway.’
Jess looked at her sharply. ‘He’s going to be free when the divorce comes through. I suppose I could be free, too. In time.’
‘Wouldn’t do any good, dear. His wife’s still alive and you’re her sister. According to law, that’d be a forbidden marriage.’
‘What?’ Jess had gone quite white. ‘A forbidden marriage? What are you talking about?’
‘Well, you know you can’t just marry anybody, Jess. There are lists of folk that are out of bounds. Always have been. People underage or too closely related, that sort of thing. Sisters and brothers of married people are included.’
‘Are you sure, Sally? I mean, we’re no’ blood relations.’
‘Counted as part of the family. Oh, poor girl – did you never hear of this? Now you’re looking like a ghost.’ Sally jumped up and went to put her arm round Jess. ‘I only know about it myself because of a family friend. She wanted to marry her brother-in-law after her sister had got divorced, but she was told it wasn’t permitted.’
‘What did she do?’
Sally shrugged. ‘What Arnold and I did, if you remember. Naughty, naughty, eh? Of course, we got married in the end, but this girl lived with the guy for years. Some folk looked down their noses, but what could she do?’
Jess dabbed at her lips with a handkerchief, but said nothing.
‘I don’t suppose Ben knows anything about the law, either,’ Sally remarked. ‘He’d never be expecting you to do what that girl did.’
‘No,’ Jess said in a low voice. ‘He knows nothing about that law. Who would?’
‘Except me?’ Sally put her hand on Jess’s arm. ‘Hey, don’t shoot the messenger, eh?’
‘I’m just glad you told me, Sally. Ben and me – we’d have to know.’
‘Aye, well don’t forget that the law might be changed one of these days. I think I did hear that the English are talking of it, but of course, our laws are different. Look, thanks for the coffee – I’d better go and open up.’ Sally gave a long sigh. ‘No’ that I’ve the heart for it. Wish we could move out now, to be honest.’
‘I don’t wish that,’ Jess said, rising. ‘I don’t want to see the Princes flattened.’
‘We none of us want that, dear.’
When Sally had gone, Jess sat very still, trying to come to terms with what she’d been told. She seemed to be remembering now, that she’d heard of this sort of ban on certain marriages before, probably at the kirk. Had never taken much notice of it. Had never for a moment thought it could apply to her.
But, she was Marguerite’s sister, and Marguerite had been Ben’s wife, so Ben, even if they both became free, could never be hers. Unless . . .
Unless she was prepared to do what Sally’s friend, and Sally herself, had once done. Live with a man without marrying him. Jess recalled now how surprised she’d been when Sally had laughingly told her that she and Arnold wouldn’t be needing a honeymoon. Surprised, not shocked. No, what was shocking about it? If you loved somebody enough, you might be willing to do it. She’d wondered at the time if she would be willing herself, but it had all seemed so remote. Not something she need think about.
But, oh God – her fingers tightened on the pencil she was holding and heard it snap – she was thinking about it now.
It was almost one o’clock when Ben looked in, grinning so widely he seemed for once to have lost all connection with the dark, tragic heroes he usually resembled. He was still handsome, though.
‘Don’t tell me, you got the job!’ Jess cried, leaping up from her desk.
‘How d’you guess? Yes, I got the job.’
He closed the door and came to her, taking her into his arms and kissing her.
‘Oh, Jess, I can’t tell you how glad I was to get that call! I thought they’d write, but they phoned, said they’d be putting the offer in writing later, but they wanted to make sure of me. Such a relief . . . I’d really set my heart on it.’
‘I’m so glad for you,’ she said softly. ‘It’s wonderful news. When will you have to start?’
‘October. Think Rusty can hold the fort till we close?’
‘We certainly won’t be taking on anyone else.’
She moved from his arms, her mind on his success, but still glancing at the clock, which made him laugh and shake his head.
‘Same old Jess, still caring about the matinee being on time, even though we’re winding down to oblivion? OK, OK, I’m on my way. But, first, when are we going to celebrate?’
‘When can we both get away?’
‘Tonight. I’ll ask Rusty to do my evening shift.’
‘No, Ben, I don’t think so. I wouldn’t be happy about that.’
‘No. No, that was insensitive of me. Make it tomorrow, then.’ He caught at her hands. ‘Come to my place, Jess. I’ll do my party piece – ham omelettes. Or for my second trick – mushrooms instead of ham.’ He grew serious. ‘Will you come, Jess?’
‘I’ll come. If you go now and start showing that James Mason film before there’s a riot.’
‘Consider me gone.’ He blew her a kiss from the door, and left her to her thoughts and her sandwiches. These days, she didn’t always feel like seeing people in the cafe.
Sixty-Five
It was some time since Jess had been to Ben’s house, and when she stepped through the door, drawn by his hand, she felt ill at ease, for this had been her sister’s house, too. He caught her mood and sighed.
‘Ah, you’re feeling guilty, aren’t you? There’s no need. You won’t find any traces of Marguerite – she took everything with her when she went, and I’ve put all Mother’s stuff back. As you can see.’
They stood looking round at the late Mrs Daniel’s ornaments, artificial flower arrangements and embroidered cushions, and Ben gave a shrug.
‘It was all in the attic, so I thought I might as well have it around again, seeing as there was only me to please.’
‘I think it’s lovely, Ben. Part of your home. Though I understand why Marguerite wanted to make changes.’ Jess hesitated. ‘I mean, it was her home, too.’
‘No longer.’ Ben took her arm. ‘Come into the kitchen. Everything’s ready.’
‘No omelettes?’ Jess asked, staring at two large chops on a plate.
‘No eggs.
Had to go cap in hand to the butcher, and he let me have these gigot chops.’ Ben grinned. ‘I haven’t let on that Marguerite’s gone, though he must be wondering by now what’s happened to her. She could always dazzle him into letting her have more than the ration.’
‘Like Ma.’
‘Exactly. Now, what do I do? Just put these under the grill? Better do some veg first, I suppose.’
‘Oh, come on, I’ll do it!’ Jess cried, pushing him to one side. ‘It’ll be better than watching you!’
‘What a relief! Thanks, Jess. And for your reward, I can give you – guess what – a glass of wine. I’ve been saving the bottle for weeks.’
It was very pleasant for the two of them, cooking and eating the meal, the atmosphere light-hearted, the feeling of shared love deepening. Except that, at the back of her mind, Jess knew she was going to have to ask Ben about that law Sally had sprung on her as a bombshell. Nothing could have such a devastating effect on their plans, unless they could somehow get round it, but the only way she could think of their getting round it was to do something she hadn’t yet truly faced.
When they’d washed the dishes – something Jess insisted on – they moved to the living room, where they sat together on the sofa, moving aside some of Mrs Daniel’s cushions, and looking into each other’s eyes.
‘Jess,’ Ben murmured, reaching to take her into his arms. ‘Oh, Jess!’
But she knew she had to be very strong here and hold back long enough to speak to him. For if she once responded to his love-making, she would be so lost in her own feelings, she would find it too difficult to speak at all.
‘Ben, I have to ask you something,’ she told him, lightly pushing him away. ‘It’s very important.’
‘Sounds ominous.’ His fine eyes were suddenly a little wary. ‘But ask away.’
‘Well, I saw Sally yesterday and she told me about some marriage law.’ Jess’s voice faltered. ‘To be honest, it was pretty shattering.’
Keeping his eyes on her face, he said nothing.
‘Because it means we can’t get married. Seemingly, it’s not allowed, because I’m your wife’s sister. They count us as part of the family, even though your wife has left you.’
As he still said nothing, she snatched at his hand.
‘But you didn’t know about it, did you? You’d have said, wouldn’t you?’
Finally, he lowered his eyes, though he left his hand in hers.
‘I did sort of know about it,’ he answered.
‘Sort of know? You mean, you did know? And you never told me?’ Jess pulled her hand away. ‘What was the idea? Were you going to pretend it didn’t exist?’
‘Of course not. I was going to discuss it with you, but . . . well . . . it’s early days with us, isn’t it? And I didn’t want to put you off, telling you we could never get married.’
‘I had to know, Ben! You know I had to be told!’
‘Yes, but I was going to make some enquiries first. I mean, this is a law that’s bound to be changed, and a lawyer chap I know says they’re already thinking of it in England.’
‘England?’
‘Yes, there are plans to sweep away some of these old prohibitions in a new marriage act. Might become law in only a year or two. So, you see, we’d be all right, because Scotland will probably follow suit. What I’m saying is, we needn’t just give up. That’s why I didn’t talk about it at first – because I wanted to bring some hope.’
As she gazed at him without speaking, he took back her hand.
‘You see how it was, Jess? I wasn’t trying to keep anything from you. That would have been impossible, anyway. All I wanted was to find something positive for us.’
‘So, what do we do? What can we do?’
He smoothed back her hair and looked at her tenderly.
‘Couldn’t we both go to Glasgow? Maybe you could find a job. Weren’t you asking about the Citadel Cinema? Is there something going there?’
‘Assistant manager’s job coming up later this year. Mr Syme wanted me to take it, but I told him I didn’t want it.’
‘But you might want it now? Look, you could have your place, I could have mine.’ He sat back, folding his arms. ‘I’d never ask you to live with me. I know it’d be wrong to expect that.’
He paused, waiting for her to speak, but when she stayed silent went on:
‘But if we were both in Glasgow, we could see each other and have our own relationship, until we find out what’s going to happen. With the divorces, I mean, and that damned law. Would you consider it?’
‘I’ve no’ even spoken to Rusty, yet. I don’t know what my situation would be.’
‘But you could speak to him. Tell him what’s happened between us.’ Ben hesitated. ‘I think he already has a pretty good idea, anyway.’
‘He might have.’
‘Well, then, you could speak to him.’
‘All right, I will.’
‘You’d feel happier to have things out in the open anyway, wouldn’t you?’
‘I suppose I would. I don’t like deceiving him.’
‘And I’m not happy about it, either. If we care about each other, and we do, let’s clear the air. Why not, Jess?’
‘It’s a big step, Ben.’ Her gaze on him was troubled.
‘It is,’ he said steadily. ‘You’d have to be sure.’
‘And it’s all happened so quickly.’
‘Not for me. I’ve been thinking about it for a very long time. And loving me – that’s not something new for you, is it?’
‘A lot’s happened since the early days.’
Yet it was true, the starlight of the long ago still touched him. Allowed him to make her come alive. Feel passionate, wanted, as she hadn’t felt in such a long, long, weary time. It was as though they were both being offered a second chance.
Yet, the rocks were still there, weren’t they? The rocks Ben had said he’d steer round? They would have to see what they could do.
‘I’ll try to speak to Rusty,’ she said in a low voice. ‘And maybe I’d better go home now, anyway. He might already be back.’
‘We’ve hardly had any time together!’
‘Ben, we had to talk.’
‘Why do women always find the need to talk?’ he asked fondly, but Jess didn’t smile. She was glad they’d talked, glad they’d considered their situation. Only still wished that Ben had told her of that vital law before she’d asked him about it.
For a last moment, though, they lay together on the sofa, exchanging deep kisses, revelling in their closeness, until Jess finally pulled herself up and said she must run for her tram.
‘I’ll come with you,’ Ben said at once.
‘Better not. Just in case Rusty’s back.’
‘Oh, God, how I wish we needn’t worry like this!’
‘Goes with the kisses,’ she said quietly.
On reaching home, she found her fears justified. Rusty was already there.
‘You didn’t go to the pub tonight?’ she asked, trying to sound her natural self.
‘I don’t always go to the pub,’ he answered mildly.
‘Usually you do.’ She hung up her jacket, fussed with her hair. ‘I was just out for a breath of air, myself.’
‘Bit late, wasn’t it?’
‘It wasn’t dark. Would you like something to eat?’
‘No thanks. I had a good meal at the cafe before the evening shift.’
They exchanged long level glances, and she knew that this would be as good a time as any to tell him about herself and Ben. But then she looked away, deciding to leave it to some other time. It was late, they were tired. She didn’t feel like it.
‘Bed, then,’ Rusty said. ‘Same old routine.’
She looked at him, surprised. He felt the same, then?
‘It’s what most people have, isn’t it? Routine?’
‘I don’t mind it, as a matter of fact.’
‘Can be comforting.’
‘Yes.’
And with that, they went to bed, and, surprisingly for Jess, slept long and deeply. In the morning, however, she didn’t really feel refreshed.
Sixty-Six
In mid-September, Jess was asked to attend another meeting with John Syme in Glasgow, where he told her, as pleasantly as possible, that Keys and Keys would take over ownership of the Princes on the first of December.
‘I’m afraid it means notices going out earlier than Christmas, Jess. Sorry about that.’
‘Going out when?’
‘Third week in November.’ John gave a regretful smile. ‘So people will be finishing at the end of the month.’
Jess tightened her lips. ‘That’s a nice Christmas present, John.’
‘I know, I know. But we could hardly expect Keys and Keys to pay out wages when they’re just waiting for the demolition men.’
‘And they’re coming when?’ Jess asked, wincing a little. ‘Earlier than the New Year now?’
‘No, I think they’ll wait till after Hogmanay. But the whole cinema and the cafe will have to be cleared in December. All photographs and equipment, furnishings, seats, the Wurlitzer organ, the lot. In fact, we already have a buyer for the organ, and several cinemas are interested in the photographs and furnishings. I don’t think we’ll have any difficulty getting buyers, materials still being so hard to get.’
‘When . . . when will we have to show our last picture, then?’
John looked thoughtful. ‘I should say that last week, when the notices go out. You’ll have to find something good, Jess. So that we can go out with a flourish.’
‘With a funeral march, I’d say.’
‘Ah, now, Jess, we’ve been through this before. Change has to come. We agreed on that.’ John rose to refill their coffee cups from the Cona machine in the corner of his office. ‘And if the board were to find enough to make small bonuses to those leaving, would that sweeten the pill?’
‘It would! It would make all the difference, John!’
‘All right, I’ll see what I can do. Don’t say anything for the moment, though.’ As they drank their coffee, he studied her. ‘You’re looking a little under the weather, Jess. Are things getting you down?’