“I only need one copy. In English, please.”
Kyle slid the wheeled ladder over to the top shelf and came down with a 1902 leather-bound edition. “It’s the newest version and has the sturdiest binding,” he explained.
“Thanks. This is perfect.”
“Can I get you anything to eat or drink before you plunge into your project?”
“Something to drink would be great. I can get it.”
“No, let me.” Kyle returned in a few minutes with a plate of cheese, crackers, and apples, a liter-sized glass bottle of sparkling mineral water, and a glass filled with ice.
“Such service!” Meri remarked. “Thanks, Kyle.”
“No problem. I’m on my way over to the camp. Jess and Travis should be home soon. I’ll leave her a note that you’re here.”
Meredith went to work, reading over the screenplay, looking for a likely place to insert another character. She envisioned a traveling partner for Young Heart. But how would that work?
There was a tap at the door.
“It’s open. Come in.”
She heard footsteps and thought Kyle had returned, so she didn’t look up from the papers.
A rich voice behind her said, “He looked lonely in your car, so I brought him in.”
Meri turned to see Jake standing there with his arm around Fred. She burst out laughing. Fred’s baseball cap was on backward, he had on Jake’s sunglasses, and his shirt was unbuttoned and hanging out. His arms were posed in a folded position, making him look like a rap singer.
“All he needs are baggy pants and a few gold chains and we can put him on the cover of an album. What do you think?” Jake was enjoying this moment.
“I think you’re a little crazy,” Meri said.
“From the queen of crazy, I’ll take that as a compliment.” Jake let go of Fred, and the unsupported mannequin flopped over. “The guy can’t hold his root beer,” Jake quipped.
“Help him find a nice quiet corner to sit in,” Meredith said. “I’m working here.”
“So I see,” Jake said. “Should I take him back to your car?”
“Good idea.”
Jake returned a few minutes later and stood before Meredith’s newly set up desk. He tapped on Elvis’s bowl and watched him swim around, unaffected. Meredith kept working as if Jake weren’t there.
“Your diligence is very impressive, Miss Graham. However, a wise person once reminded me of the words of Ecclesiastes, chapter 4, and I quote loosely, ‘There is no end to her toil, yet her eyes are not content with her wealth. “For whom am I toiling,” she asked, “and why am I depriving myself of enjoyment?” This too is meaningless—a miserable business.’ ”
“I’ve heard that somewhere,” Meredith said, looking up with a coy smile.
“I was hoping you had some free time this afternoon,” Jake said. “We’re all set up at the camp, and I told the crew to take the rest of the day off.” He sat down on the leather couch across the room from her, and then, apparently not content just to sit, he kicked off his loafers, stretched out, and stuffed a throw pillow under his head.
“It’s good for a person to cease from her toil and experience a little of life’s enjoyments,” Jake continued. He folded his arms across his chest and closed his eyes. “So how ’bout it?”
“You look like your greatest enjoyment in life right now would be a nap,” Meredith said, intrigued at how easily he had just made himself at home.
“Nap … nap. I know I’ve heard that word before. What does it mean? I can’t seem to remember.”
Just then they heard little footsteps pattering across the hardwood floor. Jessica’s quick, motherly steps weren’t far behind.
“Travis,” she called out as the toddler came bursting into the library.
“Hey, Travis,” Meredith said. “What are you doing?”
He stopped and stared at the two of them, his little eyes like two blue marbles.
“Hello!” Jessica called out as she caught up with her son. “I saw Kyle on my way in. He said you’re all set up here. That’s good.” Jessica came over to give Meri a warm hug. “You know you’re welcome to stay as long as you want.”
“Thanks. You guys are so gracious. I love being here.”
Travis followed his mom and grasped the hem of her shorts. He popped his first two fingers into his mouth and stared at Jake.
“You remember me, don’t you, Tiger? I was here last night. I’m the one who gave you the ride in the spaceship.” Jake sat up and opened his arms, inviting Travis to come to him.
Shyly, Travis moved toward Jake, pulling his mom with him as he went. When Travis reached the couch, Jake broke his frozen pose and lurched forward, scooping up the delighted Travis and turning him upside down, making loud spaceship sounds. Jake stood up and lifted Travis in the air, taking him for the spaceship ride of his life. Travis was all glee and no fear.
The scene brought laughter to both Jessica and Meri.
As Meri watched, a long-held image in the back of her mind vanished. A new picture took its place. Her picture of the perfect husband, the frugal, balding man who looked just like her dad, was replaced with a new image. The image was Jake, right now, right here, exactly like this.
God, will you be merciful to me, please? Take this man away from me right now! Get him out of my life. I’m trying so hard not to have feelings for him, but how in the world am I supposed to remain immune to this? I’m only a woman, God. And I don’t have a heart of steel.
Chapter Twenty-nine
It took a full five minutes for the space commander to run out of fuel and bring the little rocket in for a landing on the couch. A few minutes of tummy tickling followed and then the firm words of Mother. “Come on, Travis. It’s time for me to read you a story.”
Meri guessed that was a ploy to get him in his room, all settled down and sleepy so that he would be more willing to take a nap. Jessica and the reluctant Travis left, and Jake returned to his reclining position on the couch.
Without looking up from her papers, Meri said, “Sure is hard to get any work done around here.”
Jake closed his eyes and let his rapid breathing slow down. “I love little kids,” he stated. “I want at least a dozen.”
Meri was startled by his comment but gave a quick comeback. “You know what they say, ‘First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes the baby in the baby carriage.’ That progression might be a little confusing to someone who doesn’t believe in love.”
Jake opened his eyes and turned his head toward Meredith. “I never said I didn’t believe in love. I said I don’t agree with the notion of falling in love and letting that be the basis for a relationship.”
Meredith didn’t reply.
Jake sat up. “Is that why you call me a cold fish head?”
Meredith looked shocked. “I don’t call you a cold fish head!”
“That’s what Shelly said.”
“You can’t believe everything you hear.” Meredith felt herself blushing. She was furious with her meddling sister. How could a sister do that?!
“I’m not a cold fish. I’m picky.”
“So am I,” Meredith shot back.
“There are too many traps out there when it comes to relationships.”
“Too many losers,” Meredith echoed.
Jake leaned forward, his hands on his knees, his voice rising. “A marriage relationship is based on a lasting commitment, not on feelings.”
“Without feelings we wouldn’t be human.”
“With feelings we make weak and foolish decisions.”
“If God is in control, everything that happens comes from his hand.”
Jake stood to face her, a worthy opponent in the war of words. “If we are depending on him, we don’t have to rely on frail emotions.”
“He made our pickin’ emotions!” Meredith shouted, standing to face Jake.
Jake paused. With a calmer voice he said, “I believe in commitment.”
“I belie
ve in love,” Meredith retaliated.
“God calls us to a life of commitment.”
“Then why didn’t he say, ‘These three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is commitment’?”
Jake stared at her.
She stared right back.
Neither of them spoke.
Meredith sat down first, a nonverbal gesture of her victory.
Jake laid down and drew in a long breath. He put his arm over his forehead and kept breathing deeply.
Meredith picked up the copy of Pilgrim’s Progress and began to scan the pages, trying to get her mind back on her task. She was still, above all, this man’s editor. Best to let sleeping dogs lie, so to speak.
“You know,” Jake said calmly, “love is more than an emotion. It’s a choice first. That choice leads to commitment.”
Meredith had to smile. This guy worked hard to come to that conclusion. The truth was, she agreed with him. Should she give him the satisfaction of knowing that?
“You’re right,” she said sweetly.
“You agree with me?” he asked, opening one eye.
“Yes, of course. One hundred percent.”
“Then what were we fighting about?”
“Was that a fight? That wasn’t a fight. You should see me when I fight! It’s a grand and glorious sight.”
Jake shook his head. “You are by far the most alive woman I have ever met.”
“Alive?” Meri echoed. “That’s good. We can put that right up there with ‘original.’ ”
Again, Jake seemed stumped. He had run out of verbal ammo and seemed eager to close his eyes and go back to his napping.
Meri smoothed the pages of Kyle’s treasured book and started to make notes of some of the key points in Pilgrim’s Progress. The main character, Christian, began his journey after reading in the Bible that he was condemned to die because of his sins. He met Evangelist, who directed him to the narrow path. With a heavy burden slung over his shoulder, Christian took to the narrow path, where he was met by many who opposed or questioned his quest. His burden was swallowed up by a sepulcher when he came to the cross, confessed his sin, and surrendered to Christ. The rest of the journey was full of ups and downs as Christian pushed on toward the Celestial City.
She silently read the portion where Christian and his companion, Hopeful, were about to enter the Celestial City. “The pilgrims saw the City was built of pearls and precious stones. The streets were paved with gold. Reflections of sunbeams off the natural glory of the city made Christian sick with desire. Both he and Hopeful cried out, ‘If you see my Beloved, tell him I am sick with love.’ ”
Sounds like a rather emotional reaction from a guy who’s supposed to be on a quest of commitment! She checked the author’s note at the back of the book to verify her recollection. Yes, John Bunyan wrote this classic during the twelve years he spent in prison for preaching without permission from the established church. He wrote those words around 1647.
Looking over at Jake, who was asleep on the cushy sofa, Meri thought, You’re wrong, Mr. Logic. Love sickness and falling in love isn’t a modern American malady. It’s been around for a long time. If John here can quote Song of Solomon and get away with it, there’s something to it that’s bigger than both of us.
It struck Meredith that just as Pilgrim’s Progress was an allegory of a Christian’s journey through life, maybe falling in love was also a living allegory of how it will be when we reach heaven and can fall into the arms of our relentless lover, God. The spiritual life of love and the physical were not so vastly separated as she once thought. She remembered how Jake hadn’t wanted to hold hands at dinner when they prayed because he didn’t want to “confuse” the physical with the spiritual. Maybe the physical and spiritual were already so interwoven it wasn’t possible to dissect them or limit them by saying one was good and one was bad.
She noticed how peaceful Jake looked at the moment. He had his hand up over his forehead and looked just like her father taking a Sunday-afternoon snooze on the couch. Here was living proof of a physical and spiritual life all intertwined.
Suddenly, like a swirling, rushing wind, a strong impression came over Meredith, taking her breath and tingling her spine. Her heart began to pound. This was the man she had prayed for all these years. She was in love with Jake Wilde, and nothing or nobody could change that. Not even Jake. She couldn’t shut down her emotions. Everything within her declared that she was in every way—physically, emotionally, spiritually, and mentally—sick with love over this man.
Why are you telling me this, God? What kind of joke are you playing here?
A strong thought came to her on the heels of her doubts: Rest in hope.
She sat still. Had God just spoken to her? It seemed so clear. That phrase, rest in hope, sounded familiar. Meredith reached for her reference Bible and looked in her trusty concordance. There it was. Psalm 16:9. Funny, that was the same chapter Jake’s key verse for his Young Heart story came from.
Meredith read the verse to herself while Jake slept deeply.
“Hope,” she whispered in the stillness. “Rest in hope.” I can do that. I can rest in you, Father. And I can hope.
It struck her that Hopeful was the name of Christian’s travel companion. She skimmed the story, reading how Faithful had been his constant companion in the beginning, but then Hopeful took over and completed the journey with Christian.
Meredith started to get excited about this concept, even though she wasn’t completely sure why. Faithful. I’ve been faithful. I’ve saved myself for the right man. I’ve been obedient to God’s Word. Now Hope will become my companion. That’s what’s missing in Young Heart’s journey! He’s trying so hard and being so diligent with each foe he faces, but he doesn’t have Hope.
Meredith turned to a fresh page of paper and went to work, sketching out her ideas in long, flowing sentences. She found this method more freeing to her creative senses than typing it on the computer. Within an hour, she had the solution and felt giddy over how it all came together.
Turning on her computer, she prepared to put her scribbles in order. Her laptop made a chirping sound when it turned on. It was enough of a noise to wake the sleeping giant. While he had slept, everything had changed for Meredith. She had realized and admitted that she was in love with this man, she had sensed a fresh word of encouragement and direction from God, and she had solved the problem of what was missing in Young Heart’s story. Fresh in spirit and fully alive, Meredith greeted him with an eager, loving smile.
Jake, on the other hand, looked startled when he awoke. Apparently he had been so deeply asleep, he didn’t remember where he was. When he looked at Meredith, it was as if she had appeared out of nowhere. Glancing around quickly and moistening his dry lips, Jake tried to focus on Meredith.
“Did you have a good nap?” she asked.
“Huh? Ah, yeah.”
Meredith giggled to herself at how drowsy Jake was. No wonder he had fled from her room in such a panic that first time they saw each other. This guy could fall asleep in a second and sleep like a rock. She wondered if Eve had been met with as charming a reception when God woke Adam from his deep sleep and pronounced that since it was not good for man to be alone, this was the helper he had made suitable for him.
It became apparent all too quickly that although Meredith had heard voices and seen visions during this past hour, no angels had appeared to Jacob in his dreams. He seemed almost irritated that he had slept so long.
“I don’t know what happened,” he said, sitting up and running his fingers through his hair.
“You were tired,” Meredith suggested. “You’ve been going pretty hard and fast for a long time.”
“Did I talk in my sleep?”
Meredith laughed. “No. Do you usually?”
“I’ve been told I do.” Jake let out a huge yawn. He glanced at his watch again. “I have to get back to the camp in about an hour. Do you want to ride over there with me?”
“Oh yeah?” Jake stood and put his arms over his head. He stretched his stiff neck and rotated his shoulders.
“I’d like to suggest a new character in the video series and in the books.”
“A walk-on part, right? No lines?”
Meredith shook her head. Her smile was firm. “I know this is going to be a big hassle, but I’m convinced this is what the story needs. I’m committed to helping you rewrite.”
“You’re committed to helping rewrite,” he repeated. He made it sound like a joke.
Undaunted, Meredith pushed forward. “Young Heart needs a companion on his journey, in the same way that Christian had Faithful and then Hopeful as his traveling companions. Young Heart needs a companion who will bring to his journey the softer side of grace and mercy in the midst of all his trials.”
Jake nodded slightly as if he was tracking with her.
“He needs Hope.”
“Hope,” Jake repeated.
Meredith held up her rough pencil sketch of what she thought the young female companion should look like. “Hope.”
Jake sat down and put his head in his hands. “Do you realize what this means? We have to find an actress, rewrite the entire screenplay, delay the filming, and who knows what else.”
“Yes,” Meredith stated calmly. “I know.”
Jake looked at her. She could almost see the zillion thoughts racing through his mind.
“It’s your choice, of course,” Meredith said. “I only offer this as a suggestion. You have a good story here. It will make a good video and book series. If you add Hope, I believe you will have a great story, and you’ll double your audience appeal.”
Jake kept staring at her, still thinking all this through.
“You’re right,” he finally said. “I don’t want to change everything, I don’t want to halt production, I don’t want to lose any money, but you are absolutely right.”
Meredith gave him a comforting grin. She knew she was right. Deep inside she felt good. Better than she had felt emotionally, spiritually, mentally, and physically in a long time. She was in love, and in her heart, she was resting in hope.
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