by Taylor Hart
He nodded. “You could. You could run a nonprofit and have people apply.”
“I want to look into that.”
“That would be cool,” he agreed.
For a few moments, neither of them spoke, but it wasn’t uncomfortable silence.
She turned to him. “I’ve wanted to ask you this since breakfast. How can you believe in God when you have clearly lost so much?”
He wasn’t trying to ignore her, but he didn’t quite know how to explain what he was feeling. How he felt about concepts like God. He shrugged. “I know it might not help you, but I believe God has a plan for our lives. Even when it’s hard. Even when we don’t understand it.”
She smiled. “I used to go to church with Mama and Daddy every Sunday. We lived in a small town in Montana. It was a small white church. Christian denomination. I remember the part I loved about going was the music.” She started to hum. Then the most beautiful music he’d ever heard came out of her. “Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound, to save a wretch, like me. I once was lost, but now I’m found. Was blind, but now I’m free.” Tears misted her eyes.
He wanted to beg her to continue, but he didn’t want to lose the fragile connection between them. “That’s my favorite song,” Kyle said softly, unable to believe she had just sung it so beautifully.
Tears shimmered in her eyes. “Really?”
He felt a lump in his throat. “Really.”
“It was my mama’s favorite song too.” She blinked and frowned. “Now, she’s gone. I lost her. I lost both of them.”
Wishing he could do something, he found himself taking her hand and giving it a gentle squeeze.
Her eyes fluttered, and tears washed down her cheeks. “A couple of days after their funeral, I remember sitting in the hospital, getting a checkup for what I have left with my grandma before we moved to Colorado. I remember thinking that I deserved to lose my hand, ya know?” She shrugged and bowed her head.
“What are you talking about?”
“My parents were gone, and it was my fault. I deserved to remember that I sent two of the most amazing people to their death.”
“That’s not fair,” he protested.
“It is fair. It’s completely fair, and it’s completely true.” She sighed. “I have a prosthetic that I got my senior year in high school. My grandmother did a lot of contacting people and found an organization that funded them. She always pushed me to wear it, but I just didn’t want to. Even now …”
He didn’t know what to say. “You won’t wear it.”
“It’s not fancy, but I guess I just don’t feel like …”
“You deserve to be normal.”
Her face crumbled into sadness for a second; then she turned away from him.
“I’m sorry,” he said quickly. “I didn’t mean it like that.”
She shook her head. “I guess what you’re saying is kind of true, but the stupid thing was that with Evan, my old boyfriend, we were together for nine months, and he never brought up my injury until the end. Until he just said he couldn’t do it.” She let out a harsh laugh. “Later, I wanted to ask him what he had to do. I did everything myself. The sad thing is that I wonder now if I would have worn the prosthetic … maybe he wouldn’t have left.”
Kyle wanted to tell her that all of her feelings were normal, but he didn’t know how to pull it off the way Russell would pull it off.
“Gosh, I sound pathetic, don’t I?”
He took her hand. “You’re not pathetic. I think if you want to wear a prosthetic, then wear it, but if you don’t, don’t.”
Kennedy sighed. “It makes me look pretty normal, but it just doesn’t feel right.”
There was so much Kyle wanted to tell this woman. There was so much he felt for her and so much he hurt for her.
Tears were on her cheeks. “And, right or wrong, I am angry at God. I just wish my parents were here. I need them so much. Every day, I wish I could talk to them and make sure I’m doing it right and that everything is going right. I just want to ask them questions, and I …”
He felt the loss. He felt the pain. “Shh, it’s okay.”
She didn’t move. After a moment, she shrugged off his arm. “I miss them.”
“I know you do. I know. I think of all the guys I wish I could talk to.” He hesitated. “I even think of Cassidy sometimes. Which is …” Dang, had he really just said that? He raked a hand through his hair.
“Cassidy?” She looked confused. “Oh, the woman you were engaged to.”
“Yeah.” Why the hell had he said that? It felt like an admission he shouldn’t have given up.
“Fair’s fair. I want to know about you too.”
He didn’t speak right away.
Gently, she nudged his shoulder. “Hey, it’s my turn to stalk you.” She widened her eyes. “This is my creepy stalker look. Now, tell me about your ex-girlfriend.”
Unable to do anything except laugh, he shook his head. “That was not how I looked at you that first day you said I was a stalker.”
She laughed harder. “It was.”
He liked her laugh. More than anything, he liked seeing her happy. “Fine. Thinking of her every day when we were captured got me home, so when I got home and discovered she wasn’t mine anymore, it did funny things to me.” He hesitated, unsure how much he wanted to share all of this.
“Oh no. You don’t get to shut down either, Bones.”
He grinned, liking how she was calling him out just like he had called her out. “It’s fine. Russell says I’ve been running from it for two years.”
Tentatively, she put her hand on his and squeezed. “How do you run?”
He sighed. “I work. A lot. It’s been amazing to have all this opportunity to expand my gyms, but it’s all I do.”
She was quiet for a moment. “I get it.”
“You do?”
“It’s easier not to think about it. We’re going to see her tonight, aren’t we?”
Dang! He was transparent. “Yes, we most likely will.”
Mischief flashed in her eyes. “And her bigwig football player husband?”
He cringed. “Yes.”
“And you’re nervous. You’re completely nervous.” She snickered. “Cocky Kyle Bones is nervous.”
He shook his head. “Fine. If we’re being vulnerable, yes, I’m a bit nervous. I look at her life, and sometimes I think that should have been my life.”
“Wow.” She let out a breath. “You’re messed up, dude.”
Kyle couldn’t help but chuckle. This woman had fangs. “Never had someone say that so rudely before. Usually, Russell is a bit more diplomatic.”
She laughed and nudged him again.
He laughed, too. Fine, maybe he liked that she wasn’t hesitating about being close to him.
“Like I can say anyone is messed up.” She held up her missing hand. “I just told you I purposefully don’t wear my prosthetic because I feel like I killed my parents.”
The way she said it so plainly made him want to kiss her again. Sure, she was young, and she had some rough edges. But there was something so real about this girl. Something that had been missing from the women he usually dated who hung out at the gym. Gently, he swiped a stray hair out of her eyes. “You’ve mentioned that this seven-year gap is a lot between us, but somehow I get the feeling that age is much more than years with you, Dawson.”
Their gaze held. She looked at his lips, then pulled back. “Maybe.” She wagged a finger at him. “But I want to know more about you. I want your whole story. You mentioned you grew up in foster care.”
Trying to avoid a situation where he would have to share, he flashed her a smile. “Hey, Prince Charming just lives in castles and goes for rides on his horse and slays dragons, right?” He looked away. “No story.”
She frowned at him.
He stood. “Plus, we have to head back and get ready for the ball.”
“Don’t give me that white knight smile. Don’t do that.” The w
oman didn’t budge, crossing her arms.
He shook his head, in no mood to roll out his sad story. “Nope. We seriously have to get back.”
“You’re not getting off the hook.” She raised an eyebrow. “Maybe not right now, but I want the whole story.”
The truth was that he actually looked forward to her demanding to know more about him. And when was the last time he wanted to share his secrets with a woman? Not since Cassidy.
She stood and gave him a sweeping up-and-down gesture. “I can’t believe you’re nervous for tonight.” She scrunched up her nose. “It’s actually kind of cute.”
“My pain is cute?” He rolled his eyes. “That’s great.” But despite his sarcasm, he didn’t mind that she shifted her focus to him going tonight, instead of on his past.
She shook her head. “Fine. Ya know, I wasn’t looking forward to this whole thing, either. But dang it, Kyle Bones, we’re going to go tonight and we’re going to have fun.”
“Fun?” He didn’t think tonight would be what he would call fun.
She nodded, looking the same way she’d looked out on the beach the other morning. “I will help you not stress about seeing the ex and seeing the ex’s very famous football player.” She tapped her chin. “Is the Kincaid guy cute? He probably is.”
“You’re not helping.”
She laughed. “Kidding. Okay, refocus: we’re going to meet the ex-girlfriend, and I’ll get to see you all dressed up and Prince Charming-ish.”
He grinned at her. “Even though it sounds somewhat awful, it could be the best first date we’ll ever have.”
She rolled her eyes. “Fine, it’s a first date.”
Feeling like he’d won an MMA fight, he resisted the urge to put his hand in the air and celebrate.
As if sensing his desire to celebrate, she pointed at him and started walking away. “Don’t get cocky, Bones.”
Chapter 13
Kyle waited inside the front door of his Jackson home and looked up at the stairs. They’d only gotten back from the hike an hour ago.
She hadn’t been that happy when he’d taken her into her room and there had been a rack of clothes waiting for her. “What is this?” she had asked.
“You don’t have to use them, but this event tonight is a bit dressy. Like, boots-and-hat kinda dressy.”
She’d turned angry eyes on him. “Why didn’t you tell me how dressy?”
“I just want you to have something nice to wear if you want it. If you would have been a dude who won the trip, I would have dude clothes for you too. It’s been part of the plan.”
“Would you have kissed a dude?”
He grimaced. “Ah, no.”
Whipping away from him, she went to the rack of clothes. “You just had to spend more money, didn’t you?”
So now, he waited at the bottom of his stairs, hoping she’d liked something. Hoping that among the assorted sizes she had found something that fit. Hoping she wasn’t sitting up there, refusing to pick a dress out of sheer stubbornness. It was five-thirty, and they had to be going. He was expected at the convention center to meet Scar by six. There was a meet and greet before the concert. While he still wasn’t looking forward to it, it didn’t hurt that Kennedy was so determined they would have fun tonight.
Vacillating between wanting to whistle for her to hurry up and running up the stairs and banging on the door, he told himself to give it five more minutes. He thought of earlier, of everything she’d admitted to him. The fact that she was so vulnerable and she worked so hard to hide it made him like her even more.
Right then, Russell called.
“Sup,” Kyle said.
Russell laughed. “How’s the date?”
Turning away from the stairs, Kyle sauntered into the dining room that he had never actually used. Maybe that was something he could do with Kennedy. They would be going back to Florida tomorrow. “Truthfully, I really like her. She’s down to earth, and she’s kind of broken. Did you know she didn’t even talk to her last boyfriend about her injury? Isn’t that insane? He just up and left her one day, telling her he couldn’t deal with it.”
Russell sighed. “I guess all my counseling you is paying off. Now, you can counsel her.”
“Maybe,” Kyle agreed. “You’ve helped me deal with my crap. Maybe it’s my turn to help someone else.”
Russell laughed. “Man, I hate you so bad right now.”
Shocked, Kyle glanced at the phone. “Why?”
“Because she is amazing, and I’m sure you’ve kissed her, swept her off her feet, and won her over completely.”
If Russell only knew the truth … but Kyle played it cool. “We’ve kissed, but we’re taking it slow. This one informed me the only thing that sweeps her off her feet is her surfboard.”
Booming laughter came out of the phone. “I seriously want to propose to her. Hand her the phone.”
“No way.” Kyle chuckled and walked back to the stairs. Then he froze: Kennedy was at the top, descending with grace. “I have to go.” He ended the call.
Kennedy had chosen the tight red satin shirt with white frills. Her blonde hair fell in perfect soft curls down her shoulders. The woman smiled like Carrie Underwood, and with the white hat and white cowboy boots, she looked stunning.
Unable to stop himself, he whistled under his breath.
She reached the bottom, and for a moment, they both just stood there, staring into each other’s eyes. Eventually, she said, “You look good as a cowboy.”
He grinned and thought of the dark Wranglers and black button-down shirt he was wearing. It wasn’t his style, but he was trying.
She reached up and touched the top of his black hat. “Got the Tim McGraw thing going on.”
Without thinking, he gently reached for her hand, closing the distance between them. Her lemon scent floated around him, all but kissing his skin. “You smell so good.” He inhaled deeper, and she laughed. Softly, he kissed her lips.
She smiled. “We shouldn’t do that.”
“But the kisses mean something,” he protested.
“Do they?” she asked, pulling back and looking coy. “What do they mean?”
Softly, he kissed her again. “They mean I like you. Is that okay?” The words felt real.
“I like you too.”
It was silly how much this confession meant. He grinned at her. “So we are officially in ‘like.’”
She grinned back. “Are you ready to see the ex?”
He let out a breath, hating that this encounter with his ex was getting this much attention. “As ready as I’ll ever be.”
* * *
Twenty minutes later, arm in arm, Kyle escorted Kennedy into the all-stars pre-event. It was held in the stadium that hosted all of the concerts, the same one Sloane Kent and Waters and Crew would all be performing at in an hour. It was funny—he had felt self-conscious about all the big names that would be here, but with Kennedy on his arm, he didn’t care about much else.
Scar Walker spotted him right away, apparently waiting for him. He approached with his fist out to bump knuckles. “Dude, you are looking good tonight.”
Scar was dressed all country too, but the truth was that they were about the same size and both ex-Navy SEALs, and Kyle was itching to get him in the rink sometime and have at him.
Scar gave Kennedy a huge grin, the kind that Kyle himself reserved for the media. “So this must be the young woman who won the trip?”
Kyle ceremoniously introduced them. “Scar Walker, head of the Sparring for Vets Project, meet Kennedy Dawson, superstar surf girl. She will be a senior at Miami next year, and she’s hoping to pursue a job in radio.”
Scar looked impressed and shook her hand. “Nice to meet you.”
Scar’s wife meandered over. Scar introduced her as Shayla, and she began asking Kennedy all kinds of questions. Before long, the two found they’d attended the same college.
As they happily chatted, Scar turned all his attention to him. “So you made it
, and she’s pretty.” Scar gave him a pointed look.
Kyle rolled his eyes, still not happy about being at this event, but he couldn’t hide how happy he was to be here with Kennedy. “It worked out.”
Scar grinned at him. “C’mon, let’s go see the Kincaids.”
Nervous angst wound through Kyle, but he forced it down.
Kennedy took his hand as they headed toward Cassidy and Anthony. Kyle noted that Kade Kincaid and his wife were there too. It was like facing a freaking dynasty. Both men were at least as tall as him and both huge. Even though Kade had given up his quarterbacking days last year, he still looked ripped.
Scar clapped them on the back. “Kade, Anthony, look who I found.”
Both men turned to him, but before Kyle could acknowledge them, Cassidy broke loose from Anthony’s side and rushed into Kyle’s arms. “Kyle!” she said.
Startled, he let her hug him, but his eyes locked with Anthony’s, and he could tell the man was not happy about this. Awkwardly, he hugged her back, feeling an intense stare from Kade too.
Kyle’s smile faltered when he noticed that Cassidy’s eyes were bloodshot. “Hey,” he said.
She held him tightly before pulling back, tears in her eyes. “It’s just so good to see you.” Tentatively, she stepped back. “I’ve just been having these dreams that you were still in Afghanistan and you were being tortured.”
The confession felt intimate. Kyle blinked. “Oh.”
Cassidy looked from side to side, as if noticing for the first time that there were onlookers. “I’m sorry.” She helplessly turned to Anthony. “I’m sorry.”
Anthony cleared his throat and put his hand out to Kyle. “Hey, man.”
Kyle braced himself against so many memories of Anthony at her house when Kyle had surfaced from the dead. And he’d been about to propose, to boot! “Hey.”
As they clasped hands, it turned into one of those stupid hand-crushing wars that Kyle hadn’t gotten into since his first year of deployment. Anthony crushed harder, his knuckles turning white.
Kyle frowned at him. “Do you have a problem?”