by Natasha Boyd
“Mmm, yes, the purple pod please.”
“How do you not drink coffee all day?” I asked as I made her a small expresso. “This stuff is so good.” I pulled up a chair at the large kitchen table. “Can you take a break from the front desk before we leave?”
“Yeah, no problem. I can hear the phone from here. I actually do a lot of the accounts right here just to be near the action. Joey and I are like passing ships right now. He’s working flat out at the hospital.”
Jazz and my brother had finally gotten together for good three years ago after Jazz came back from a stint South Africa.
My brother had told me he was worried about how much Jazz had taken on. I’d assured him if anyone could handle it, Jazz could. She had more mental bandwidth than almost anyone I knew.
“I’m sorry you guys are working so hard. But I’m so proud of you.”
“Stop it.”
“You stop it. I am,” I insisted. “It’s not patronizing. It’s ... I’m in awe.”
Jazz laughed. “Seriously, leave off. Anyway, I’m in awe of you.”
“I haven’t done anything awesome lately.” My voice sank into a whisper, and it was out before I could edit it. Before I even knew I was going to say it. “Except, apparently make an anxious-to-spend-the-rest-of-his-life-with-me boyfriend decide to maybe not want to ... tie the knot at all.” Cringing, I took my coffee with its frothed milk topping and blew through the foam with great concentration.
The sound of Jazz’s cup setting down hard on the table top made me look up. She was staring at me with incredulity.
“What?” I asked defensively.
She lifted her shoulders, then pursed her lips. After looking at me a few beats, she let out the breath she was holding. “What makes you think that?”
“We ... I,” the correction was quick off my tongue. “I feel like we’ve been distant. He’s been really preoccupied. I know he has the movie on his mind, and I’m sure the decision to go public about his connection to the character he’s playing is weighing on him. We don’t talk about it. And then he distracts me.”
“Distracts you how?”
“Well, we’re always good ... you know,” I widened my eyes, “that way.” My cheeks warmed. “That stuff makes me forget we have other things we need to talk about.”
Jazz snorted with amusement. “I really thought you’d be able to talk about stuff more easily now that you’re in your late twenties.”
“I can!” I grinned and glanced at the door. “I can, but you know, there could be guests.”
“Fine. I’ll give you that. But seriously. The guy’s been wanting to marry you since the time you were officially together in the eyes of the world and probably from the day he met you. He just didn’t want to pressure you. You made that clear from day one. He’s been waiting for you to let him know when it’s okay.”
A rough dry rock had formed in my throat. “That—” I tried to clear it. “That’s just the thing. You remember early this year when Charlotte and Jeff came over and got married?”
Jazz frowned. “Uh, yes. It was completely adorable. Helping you was what convinced me to offer weddings at the Butler House.”
“Well, I loved their wedding too. I mean, obviously. But more than that, it made me want it to be us. Jack and me. And I told him so. That I was ready for everything. He was ecstatic. But he said I had to wait for him to ask me. So here I am ... still waiting.”
It sounded so ridiculous. I winced as I said it. Especially in light of the fact it was more than eight months ago.
“No, I’m sure there’s a ton of good reasons. Waiting for the right time and all that. Maybe he wants to surprise you.” Jazz’s ready words were comforting, but I hated the look I saw flash in her eyes before she covered it up.
Four
“Hello?” A girl’s voice called from the doorway of the kitchen where Jazz and I sat having our coffee.
Jazz jumped to her feet as an ebony-haired and big-eyed female face peered around the door frame.
“Hi,” Jazz said. “Nicole. Come in, come in.”
“Oh, I don’t want to intrude.”
“Don’t be silly. This is my friend, Keri Ann. We were just catching up. Come in and join us.”
I smiled and stood as the newcomer came inside. About the same age as us, she had pale but perfect skin and a small, voluptuous but perfectly proportioned body dressed in jeans and pale pink sweater. She was adorable. “Nice to meet you. I thought we were coming to pick you up at the airport today,” I added.
“Coffee?” Jazz asked.
Nicole nodded. “Yes, please. Got in last night. My mother was driving me crazy about coming down here with me so I ducked out a day early before she could come with me to the airport. We’re, uh, not seeing eye-to-eye at the moment. She’ll come down anyway, I’m sure, at least for a few days. Then she’ll be back for the wedding. She needs to feel in control. But for now, I just needed a break.”
Jazz came over with a cup for Nicole, and we all sat back down.
“You don’t want your mother involved then?” If my mother were still alive, I couldn’t imagine not having her or Nana involved.
Nicole dropped her eyes, her cheeks flushing. “I do. Kind of. But she organized this big New York wedding, and I just want a small one. She doesn’t know why I want to have it in Butler Cove either. But I love it down here.”
Jazz and I glanced at each other. “We get it,” Jazz said. “We love it here too. Obviously.”
“David, my fiancé, has been so supportive. He told me we could have two weddings. One here, one there.” Her eyes glanced to the side, and I could tell she definitely didn’t want two weddings. And how was her fiancé making her have two weddings supportive of her wanting to have a small one?
After a few more minutes of chatting, Nicole suddenly got quiet and wide-eyed as she stared at me.
“What?” I asked and glanced behind me.
Nicole put her hand to her mouth. “Oh my gosh. You’re Keri Ann Butler.”
My cheeks instantly heated as they always did when being scrutinized.
“I mean I should have known,” she went on. “This is the Butler house, after all. And, oh my gosh,” she said again.
Being Jack Eversea’s girlfriend came with its own set of challenges. Feeling like a newly discovered zit on prom night was one of them.
Jazz looked alarmed. We never knew when people would start acting like crazy fans. Nicole didn’t seem the type, but you never knew.
“I’m so honored to meet you,” she whispered. “Oh no, you think I’m crazy. It’s just I’m obsessed with your art. And my grandmother left me with a bunch of sea glass she’d collected over the years. And I just felt so connected to you ever since I heard about you, and your story, and your grandmother, and oh my gosh, I’m rambling again. David always says I get giddy and stupid and get verbal diarrhea. Wow, I really need to stop talking. It’s just amazing to meet you.” She took a deep breath. Her pale face had turned deep red. “I’m so sorry.”
I let out a matching breath and laughed. “It’s fine. Really. It’s nice to meet you too.”
“Phew.” Jazz’s shoulders relaxed. “I thought you were going to go all rabid Jack Eversea fan on Keri Ann.”
Nicole blushed. “He is gorgeous, don’t get me wrong.”
Jazz laughed. “Ain’t that the truth.”
“I agree,” I said smiling. “Obviously.”
Jazz’s phone buzzed. “I have to take this call,” she said. “Be right back.”
“So your grandmother left you sea glass?” I latched onto something to talk about.
Nicole nodded. “Yes. I read a story about you. I think it was in Garden & Gun. Anyway, you talked about how your grandmother used to collect it and how she inspired you. Anyway, it just really resonated, so I’ve been a big fan of yours ever since. I’m not artistic. Not even a little bit. So, well, I don’t know why I’m talking so much.”
I laughed again, relieved she really wa
s excited about meeting me and not Jack, and it wasn’t just a cover. “You’re adorable. It’s fine. I’m completely flattered. And in case you haven’t figured it out yet, I’m not scary so you don’t need to be nervous.”
Nicole gave a timid smile. “Okay.”
“So how long are you staying?”
“It’s supposed to be just a few days, but I’m thinking of just staying. The wedding is so close. The Saturday after Thanksgiving. We’re finalizing menus. I know I could have done it on the phone, but ... I kind of just want to be here. I’ve taken a leave off work.”
But she needed a break from her mother and maybe her fiancé too? I was conjecturing. It was just a feeling. “What do you do?”
“Um, I have a teaching degree. But my mother needed me to work with her charity. So currently I’m kind of a glorified receptionist. Nothing, um, nothing interesting.” She trailed off, her eyes darting around. Her cheeks pinked as if she was embarrassed.
I wondered what she would be doing with her life without her mother’s influence, which was clearly overpowering.
“Anyway,” she cleared her throat. “It was a totally last minute decision on my part. It’s better for me because it will be smaller with such late notice.”
“Probably,” I agreed and sipped the last of my coffee.
“I’ll give you and Jazz some space to visit,” she said. “Sorry I came barging in here.”
“Don’t be silly. You stay and finish your coffee. I have to run some errands anyway.” I stood. “I think we are going out to the Snapper Grill one night with some friends. Since you’re in town by yourself, you should come with us. I’ll have Jazz give you the details.”
“Oh, thank you.” She beamed. “I’d love to.”
I shrugged on my light jacket and retied my messy bun, slipping out quietly to the hall so as not to disturb Jazz’s phone call.
“No. Relax. She has no idea,” I heard Jazz whisper. “I promise, Jack.”
What? I stopped dead. Jazz was talking to Jack? My Jack?
Her back was to me, but as if she sensed me she immediately turned around. “I have to go,” she said, her eyes wide, and hung up.
I swallowed hard. So it was about me. She was talking to my Jack.
“I have no idea about what?” I asked after a moment when Jazz just gaped at me like a fish.
“That phone call wasn’t about you.” Jazz’s skin paled. I’d never seen her look so uncomfortable. And we’d known each other a long time, so that was saying something.
My skin went clammy, and my stomach swam with sickening sludge. “Spare me,” I said, dark emotion I didn’t recognize rearing up unexpectedly. “We’ve known each other too long. What are you talking to Jack about that you can’t tell me?”
She swallowed. “It’s nothing important.”
“It’s about me. Why don’t I make the judgment of whether it’s important to me?” My mind was reeling. I didn’t know what to think. Jack had been distracted. Jazz had been distracted. Now they were having whispered, private conversations with each other.
“Nothing’s going on,” she said, seeming to answer my frantic mind.
“Are you serious, right now?” I asked. “My best friend and my boyfriend keeping secrets from me? Not to mention it seems like you and my brother are having problems.”
“We’re not having problems.” Jazz stepped back, her expression wounded. “Why would you say that? Did Joey say something to you?”
“Only that you’re working too hard.”
She gasped. “Ugh. Joey said I’m working too hard? Talk about a hypocrite!”
“That’s neither here nor there.”
“Oh my God.” Jazz crossed her arms. “Wow. That took me a moment. You think I’m having problems with my relationship, so I’m trying to make moves on your boyfriend. Is that it?”
“No, of course not. I just—”
“Really? Coz that sounded an awful lot like you were.”
I didn’t know what to say. That had been exactly what it sounded like. Was that what I’d actually thought? I didn’t understand my emotions right now.
“Wow,” Jazz whispered, pressing a hand to her abdomen. “Please don’t say one more word. I can see that the possibility crossed your mind. And I just don’t know what to do with that.”
My eyes stung. “Jazz, no. You know that’s not what I think, really. I just ... I’m so confused.”
“Well, I’m not confused. I’m devastated. I’m devastated my best friend thinks I’m capable of whatever it is that just crossed her mind. So I think you should leave.”
“Jazz—”
“Now. Please.” She looked around, seeming to realize belatedly she was kicking me out of my own home. Her shoulders sagged, and I knew if Jazz were the type to cry, her eyes would be filling like mine were right now. But Jazz always held her pain inside.
I couldn’t believe I’d hurt my best friend like this. “I’m sorry,” I whispered and then did what she asked and walked out the front door of the Butler home.
What was wrong with me?
I drove around Butler Cove, meandering through my list of errands and feeling sick over my stupid argument with Jazz. I went to the print shop to pick up my new brochures, went to the post office to send the new brochures to my art agent in New York, and took a run past Piggly Wiggly to get groceries, where I ended up buying about two tons of chocolate.
Yep, I had an agent in New York now. At Jack’s urging that I needed someone to handle any exhibition contracts, commissions, and appearances. It was something that would never have occurred to me, but I was thankful I’d listened to Jack’s advice.
A quick check of my phone showed that plans to meet up with friends, including Cooper who was back in town briefly after signing up with the Navy SEALs three years ago, were still on. But we were waiting on him to show up. There was no message from Jazz. I’d been supposed to help her with wedding stuff today, and that made me feel worse.
Obviously, I knew Jazz and Jack didn’t have anything going on. If anything, I should have been more suspicious of Jack and whatever the heck had happened to him on that movie set. Something hadn’t been right with us since he’d gotten back from England. But it had crept in so incrementally it had been easy to overlook.
I rubbed my belly as I climbed back in the Jeep, feeling more ill about the situation than ever, and headed to meet Jack at his best friend, Devon’s, beach house. Devon had fortuitously kept his home in Butler Cove, the house Jack had been staying in when we’d first met. And it was where Jack and I always stayed when we were on the island now that my childhood home had been turned into a commercial enterprise.
We’d decided to come and spend a few days on Butler Cove so I could help Jazz out with the wedding and also see some friends.
Devon’s house was still as pretty as ever. Gorgeous whitewash and blue shutters, though the flowers that normally poured out of every window box had died now that it was fall. The front door swung open as I negotiated the steps with my groceries.
“Here, let me get those,” Jack said.
The sight of him in the long sleeve gray t-shirt that hugged his broad shoulders, his green eyes and his smile, sent a wash of breathlessness through me. I’d never get tired of looking at him.
“You should have told me you were going to the store,” he said. “I would have come with you.”
“It’s okay,” I said, handing over some bags. “I was right there after dropping stuff at the post office.”
“I’m glad you got done early,” he said and looked me in the eyes as his lips descended to peck mine in greeting. All too quickly, he must have seen something in my expression. “Hey, what’s wrong?”
“I—”
Shit. I couldn’t risk Jack having the same reaction Jazz just had. “Um, I saw Jazz, this morning,” I started and led the way to Devon’s beautiful, white modern kitchen to set my bags down.
“And?”
I let out a breath, realizing I was in
danger of a wobbling chin, and tried to compose myself. “We had a fight. A stupid fight.”
Jack set the grocery bags down and picked me up, setting me on the counter top.
I clung to his warm, hard shoulders, and he moved between my legs, waiting for me to speak. I loved that he did this—just stayed quiet while I found my words.
“It’s stupid and embarrassing,” I finally said.
He kissed my nose. “Tell me.”
“I overheard Jazz talking to you on the phone.”
Under my hands Jack’s shoulders rippled almost imperceptibly. I stared into his eyes, but he was good at hiding things when he wanted to.
Moments slid by.
“Say something,” I whispered. “You not saying anything is taking what I thought was stupidity into ‘maybe I’m not that crazy.’ Even though I know it’s stupid and crazy.”
“I’m trying to figure out how much you might have heard,” he said, and my stomach lurched queasily.
“Oh my God—”
“And I’m trying not to laugh at what I think your stupid moment was.” He snorted anyway.
I poked him in the chest. “Hey, it’s not funny.”
“It’s so funny,” he said through a mouth stretched wide with mirth.
I let go of Jack and crossed my arms over my chest.
Jack pulled his lips between his teeth, his eyes slow to catch up with his attempt to be serious. “You’re right, I shouldn’t be laughing.”
“Well, what the heck are you talking to Jazz about that you can’t discuss with me?”
Jack inhaled and held the breath a moment, his cheeks puffing out. Then, as if coming to a decision, he released it and took my wrists. He unfolded my arms and put them around his neck before slipping his warm hands onto my hips. He dropped his face to my eye level. “Are you aware that it’s your birthday coming up?” he asked with a deliberately patient tone.
I nodded. “Well, yes, but—”
Jack pursed his lips and raised his eyebrows in expectation.