by Leisha Kelly
Samuel moved his hand slightly but didn’t open his eyes, and I knew he wasn’t awake. As I put the cloth back, I could feel myself trembling just a little. Lord only knew how close we’d come to losing him. I didn’t want to think about that, but there was no way I could help it. I sat beside him on the bed, trying hard not to cry, wiping away the one tear that defied my wishes by slipping slowly down my cheek.
Why, Lord? I cried, staring out the window at the darkness. Why did this have to happen? Samuel’s been so good. And he’s gone through so much in his life. It doesn’t seem right. Samuel wouldn’t agree, I know he wouldn’t, but I would rather it have been me.
The girls came back with a pile of cloth, a jar with the steeping herbs, and a glass of water, which Katie set on the nightstand that Samuel had made for us two winters before.
“The fire will be out now, won’t it?” Sarah asked. “With all the rain?”
“Let’s hope so.”
“It should’ve rained sooner.”
It surprised me, how much Sarah’s feelings mirrored my own. Perhaps I should have told her that there is a time for everything and that God is in control, even when things are far out of our hands. But I didn’t. I thought it might sound as hollow as I felt right then.
I soaked one strip of cloth in the plantain and comfrey water and then folded it carefully over the wound on Samuel’s leg. Then I wrapped other strips over it and secured them as best I could. The longest strips went around his leg twice with room left to tie. I carefully bathed the rest of his leg with the herbed water and then covered him to the waist with a blanket.
“I wish we had ice,” I said more to myself than to the girls. It would be good to set a piece of it against the back of Samuel’s head.
“Do you think Mrs. Post might have some?” Katie asked me hopefully.
“Honey, I don’t know.”
“Do you want me to run over and see?”
Her willingness surprised me. Over a mile and a half. With no horse or vehicle. Through driving rain. At night. “Oh, honey, it’s good of you to offer, but it would take you an awfully long time getting over there and back. If she did have some, it might melt before you got it here. Maybe we’d better just wait till Robert is back.”
“Surely it’ll be soon,” Sarah added.
I soaked another cloth in the herb water. “I’ll have to lift your head a little, Samuel,” I whispered. “To get another bandage on you.”
I wanted him to stir. Especially when I was laying the cloth against the back of his head and wrapping it to stay on. But he didn’t open his eyes or make any sound at all.
You’re scaring the girls, Samuel. I should’ve thought to send them out.
“Is there something more we can do?” Katie asked so quietly. Sarah just stood beside her looking pale. They were both exhausted, I could tell.
“No. It’s almost morning. You should try to get some rest while you can. I expect it’ll be a busy day coming on.”
“But Robert’ll be back soon,” Sarah protested. “I want to wait.”
“Help Delores get Berty settled somewhere. If Robert’s not here by then, you need to lie down for a while too, at least until you hear him come in.”
“What about you, Mom?” Sarah asked.
“I’ll stay right here with your father.”
The girls went out reluctantly. I could hear them in the sitting room, smoothing what had been Robert’s bedding for Berty on the floor. Delores was there too, talking about my old woven laundry basket being the perfect bassinet for baby Rosemary. Thelma might not be very comfortable on the old davenport Herman Meyer had given us, but I was glad she was willing to go there for Samuel’s sake. After a while, things got quiet, and I knew the girls had obeyed me and gone upstairs.
Alone with Samuel, I moved the oil lamp closer and carefully pulled off his shirt, hoping to check every inch of him to make sure there wasn’t something I’d missed.
I went for clean water, warmer this time, and began to bathe him carefully.
“Juli . . .”
His eyes opened slowly and focused on me, and I felt relief like a weight lifted off my back. “Oh, Samuel. How do you feel?”
“Been better.” He gave me the barest hint of a smile. But then he looked more serious. “You need some rest.”
“I don’t think—”
“Juli, please. Come here with me.”
For a moment I just stood there. Come here with him? On the bed? Of course, it was our bed. But he was so . . . hurt.
With some effort he moved his right arm and patted the bed beside him. “Come on.”
Somehow the look in his eyes convinced me. I set the water and cloth aside and sat down beside him just as close as I could, being extra careful not to jiggle the bed too much.
“I love you,” he said again.
“I love you too, Samuel. More than all the world.”
He closed his eyes, and my throat tightened, but then he opened them again. “Is Robert back? Is the fire out?”
“It started raining, honey. That ought to take the fire down. But Robert’s not back yet.”
“Lord be with them. It was bad, Juli.”
“I know.”
“I hope they saved the house.”
“The most important thing is for everyone to be all right,” I told him. “A house can be rebuilt.”
He closed his eyes again.
“Samuel, will you take a drink?”
“I’ll try.”
Something about the way he said that made me afraid. I reached for the glass of water, watching him carefully. “Are you hurting a lot?” I asked him, hoping he would tell me it was getting better, or at least not any worse. “Yeah,” he said simply.
I tried to help him drink, but he didn’t seem to want more than a sip. “I’ve got mullein and nettle, Samuel, that might help the pain. I could make a strong tea if you think you could manage it.”
“I don’t know.”
“Is your head still the worst?”
“I don’t know.”
I clasped his hand. I wanted to lay my head on his shoulder, but I wasn’t sure it wouldn’t hurt him. I shouldn’t have listened to him when they first came. I should’ve made him stay in the truck, and then brought out a lot of bedding to cushion him and had Robert drive us straight to Dr. Hall’s hospital in Mcleansboro.
“I’m so tired, Juli.”
“Well, you ought to be tired. It’s been a hard night.” “If I sleep, will you wake me when Robert gets back?” “Yes,” I told him, wondering if he was aware of having slept already.
“Come here, Juli. Come closer.”
I was already sitting on the bed right against him, holding his hand with both of mine. But I knew what he wanted. Carefully I eased down to lie beside him. I put my hand on his bare chest. His heart was racing, but his breaths were slow.
For a long time we lay like that. Once, Delores peeked in, but she went right back out. The house was so quiet. I hoped all the children were asleep.
I knew I should be doing something. Making mullein and nettle tea, at the very least. But I wasn’t sure that anything would help Samuel more than just doing what he wanted, just staying right here. Soon the rhythm of his breathing changed, and I knew he was asleep. A good, hearty, restful sleep, I hoped. A normal sleep.
I kissed his cheek. Then I sat up slowly. He looked so peaceful. I hoped Robert and George and all the rest were peaceful by now. I hoped everything was all right.
In a few minutes, I went back to the kitchen, thinking that I might put on Samuel’s medicine tea in case he’d take it when he woke up. I wasn’t sure if I should finish what I’d started, washing him and looking him over, or just let him sleep a while first.
“You want coffee?” Delores asked me.
“Yes, thank you.”
“How’s he doin’?”
“I don’t know.” I stopped, feeling an uncomfortable churn of emotion inside me. “Oh, Delores, he’s hurting, I know h
e is. I’m just not sure what to do . . .”
She came and hugged me, then she sat me in a chair. “Do you think he has bones broken?”
“Not that I could tell, but his head . . . I just don’t know how bad . . .”
“Is he talking like himself?”
“Yes.”
“Then he’s gonna be fine. You jus’ believe for that, honey.”
I knew what she was saying. And she was surely right. But inside me the nagging doubts still lingered. What if he wasn’t fine? Sometimes, with a head wound, it was just so hard to tell. And what about his side?
Delores set a cup of coffee in front of me, but I almost couldn’t drink it. This night would change some things for George Hammond. That was clear. But what about us?
8
Sarah
Katie and me lay on the floor because Georgie and Emmie were on our bed. It was almost morning. I kept expecting to see light through the window, but it was still dark. I couldn’t sleep for thinking about what had happened. And I guess I wasn’t the only one. Katie rolled over after I thought she was already asleep and just stared at the ceiling for a while.
“What if Dad had died?” she asked me with something strange and trembly in her voice.
“He didn’t,” I answered crossly. “There’s no use talking about something like that.”
For the first time in a very long time it bothered me that she’d called him Dad. He wasn’t her dad. He was only her cousin or something. Never mind that our family had taken her in when she was only six and he’d been a dad to her ever since. It upset me anyway.
“Sarah, I’m glad I wasn’t there,” she whispered. “I would’ve been scared half to pieces.”
“Well, I was scared too. Anybody would be.”
“Do you think he’ll be all right?”
“Of course he will. Mom said so.”
“I know. But she’s more worried than she wants to let on. I think it’s serious, getting knocked in the head like that.”
Of course it was. Any fool knew that. I wanted her to shut up. I wanted to tell her to. But I couldn’t be that mean. “Go to sleep. I don’t want to talk about it.”
She lay there quiet for a while, and I hoped she’d done what I said. Little Georgie giggled at something in his sleep. He just doesn’t know, I thought. There’s nothing to laugh at tonight.
“Do you think one of them went to check on the animals and spilled their lantern over?” Katie suddenly asked.
“How should I know?” I scolded. “I wasn’t there when it started.” She rolled over just a little to face me, but I didn’t look her way. “I wish I had been,” I said under my breath then, but she heard me.
“How could things have been different if you were?” she asked. “There was no way we could know it was going to happen.”
“At least I could’ve been watching.” I felt a sudden tightness inside me, like somebody was squeezing as hard as they could on my stomach. Dumb fool! a voice in my head raged. You could’ve done more than watch! You could’ve seen to it that Lester Turrey never came! It was probably him who spilled a lantern, after coming nearly two miles in the dark!
“I don’t think there was anything anybody could’ve done,” Katie said softly. “We wouldn’t have known what to watch for.”
She didn’t say anything else, and I was glad. I felt pretty miserable just lying there. Why don’t you tell her? I kept thinking. Why don’t you go tell Mom? Why are you still keeping your stupid promise?
I had no answer, but I couldn’t seem to make myself say anything more. For a little while there wasn’t a sound except the rain and Emma Grace’s breathing. But then in the distance I thought I heard a truck. It got closer pretty quickly. I sat up.
“That’s Robert,” Katie said, getting up too. “I hope he has good news.”
There won’t be much of that, I thought. Even with the fire out. I knew the Hammonds had lost a lot, and that meant we’d have less too, ’cause we always shared everything.
Georgie’d rolled so much on the bed that he had one leg hanging over. I got up and pushed him farther up. Then I covered him and Emmie and headed for the stairs.
Maybe it didn’t matter how the fire got started. Maybe it wouldn’t matter if I never told what I knew about Rorey. If it was her fault, she’d probably already learned her lesson. And surely nobody would care about having someone to blame.
I hurried down the stairs. I wanted to hear Robert tell us the fire was out. I wanted to know how bad it had gotten after we had left. I could hear Katie behind me, but I didn’t wait for her.
Robert was just coming in the back door as I got to the kitchen. I expected him to be alone, but he wasn’t. I guess I should’ve known that Mr. Hammond might send his younger boys over here along with him. Franky and Harry. They spent a lot of time at our house anyway. But what about Rorey? She was younger than Franky.
“How’s Dad?” Robert asked right away.
“Sleeping,” Mom told him. She looked so tired. I wished I knew something to do about it. Robert looked tired too. Drenched to the bone and muddy to boot. But nothing like Franky. Franky looked like he could fall over.
“Sit down,” Mom told them all. “Let me get you something to eat. You’ve been working so hard. Is the fire out?”
“It looks out,” Harry answered. “But Pa an’ Willy an’ Kirk are stayin’ put just to be sure.”
“Mom,” Robert persisted. “Is he really okay? Is it really just sleep?”
Mom stopped in her tracks for a minute. She saw me in the doorway and glanced my way but turned quickly back to Robert. Franky was the only one to sit down.
“I believe it’s good sleep,” Mom said. “I believe he’ll be all right. But once you’ve had a chance to sit a minute and get a bite or two, I’d thank you to go inquire after the doctor, in case he heard Delores was here and thinks we might not need him. It just serves us well to be cautious.”
Robert took her very seriously. “I can go now, Mom. I don’t have to wait.”
“No. Let me at least get you a sandwich to take along. And maybe you ought to have company, to keep you awake. Would you be up to that, Franky?”
I knew Franky well enough to know that despite how he felt, he wasn’t likely to tell her no. But before he got a chance to say anything, Robert was answering for him.
“No, Mom. Not Franky. I didn’t even want to bring him here. I sure don’t want him along no further. Besides, he’s hurt.”
“Hurt?” Mom jumped on that one word and was immediately at Franky’s side. But I stared at my brother. It wasn’t like Robert to sound so hard. Franky wasn’t his best friend, that was true. But he was a friend. Practically a brother, for all the time Franky spent with our folks. Why wouldn’t Robert want to bring him?
“What’s happened?” Mom was questioning Franky. “Where are you hurt?”
“I’m all right,” Franky answered her. But I knew he wasn’t, and so did Mom. She noticed the filthy old hanky around his hand at the same time I did. She lifted his arm gently, but he started to pull away.
“Quit acting so tough,” Robert said harshly. “Let ’em doctor you. You know that’s why your pa sent you. That and getting you out of his sight for a while.”
Mom looked really angry. “Robert John! No matter what kind of night we’ve had, you’re not to speak like that! What has gotten into you?”
“It was his fault, Mom,” Robert said, with something awfully raw in his voice. “They lost the barn and a whole lot else, and the house is damaged, and we almost lost Dad—”
His words struck at me deep. “It—it doesn’t have to be somebody’s fault!” I cried without thinking.
“You don’t know what their pa said,” Robert answered me right back.
“Sarah’s right,” Mom interrupted. “There’s no use pointing fingers. Accidents happen.”
I couldn’t believe how calm she sounded. I couldn’t have said another word right then. But Franky? How could it be? Had he follo
wed Rorey tonight too? Had he fought with Lester again? I wanted to ask him. I wanted to demand that he tell me, but I just stood there half choked.
Mom took hold of Franky’s hand and asked him to let her see. She turned her eyes to me only for a second. “Sarah, get your brother and Harry a couple of sandwiches.”
“Yes, Mom,” I managed to answer her. I felt like I was shaking. I hoped nobody could tell.
“I could ride to the doctor with Robert,” Katie suddenly offered. “I’m sure I’m not as tired as Harry or Frank.” I hadn’t even realized she was that close behind me.
Mom nodded. That was all. And for a minute I thought I should have offered, but I was glad I hadn’t. I would rather stay here, because Daddy was here. I didn’t want to be gone for a minute.
Another truck came hurrying up our lane, and I wasn’t sure who to expect. Thelma’s brother, maybe. Mrs. Pratt came in the room then, took one look at Franky’s hand, and reached for some water.
“You get a nail in it, honey? Best soak it some to draw out the poison.”
Franky didn’t say anything, only obediently stuck his hand down into the water. I wondered how much worse this night could get. Robert had said they’d lost a lot and the house was damaged. How bad was it?
Harry moved to the door and opened it before whoever it was had a chance to knock. Thelma’s brother Richard came in from the porch, followed closely by Mr. Post.
“How’s Samuel?” Mr. Post asked right away.
“He’s sleeping, Barrett,” Mom said softly. “I’m glad you both are here. I was going to send Robert for the doctor, but I’d feel better about it if one of you went along.”
I expected Robert to say something about that. But he didn’t. Neither did Katie, though if Mr. Post or Richard went, it wasn’t likely she’d need to.
“Is he in the bed?” Mr. Post asked.
“Yes,” Mom answered him.
“You mind if I go in and see him a minute?”
Mom shook her head. She looked so tired. But she got up and went with him. I wanted to go too, but she’d given me a job. Delores was seeing to Franky. I had to hurry up and make those sandwiches, and it’d be the right thing to feed Mr. Post and Richard Pratt something too, since they’d been helping. And Franky, if he could eat right now. Mom had only been looking at his one hand. But now Mrs. Pratt was looking over both of them.