by Zaza, Agatha
‘I’ll make an appointment for you for Monday with a counsellor,’ he said.
‘Monday’s too soon,’ she turned away from him, facing the back of the sofa.
‘I won’t stay with you unless you see one,’ Edmund said, and she stiffened. ‘There’s no future for us without help. I should have insisted right from the start, but I wanted to believe love is all you need and that sort of nonsense.’ He shifted where he sat. ‘I’m not naïve. I didn’t believe that I’d saved you or that that part of you was gone. But I let myself become complacent. I was sure you’d never hurt Oliver, and it’s only because I know you didn’t mean to hurt him that I’m still with you.’
Her eyes filled up with tears, but they didn’t move him. He wouldn’t be the first man to make ultimatums to his partner. He wouldn’t be the first man to declare that it would be over if she didn’t do as he said.
Jasper.
Holly was gone, from what John had been able to garner from the situation. She hadn’t believed Jasper when he’d told her about Ovidia — what Ovidia had done to him. Edmund could no longer keep Ovidia away from the damage she’d wrought upon his brother.
He stared at the wall and realised that despite planning to leave, he hadn’t so far taken any practical action to find a new place to. And now, when he envisioned the future — Jasper getting better, Ovidia seeking help — he saw it in this house.
If he could have even a modicum of that joy they’d shared before, it would be enough. Edmund told himself he was making a conscious decision to remain with Ovidia. They both had made mistakes, and, because of this, their life together would never be normal. They could never really trust each other; the naivety with which they’d launched into their relationship was gone.
He and Ovidia could have a future together, perhaps with another child. Jasper could be part of their new life, and, somehow, Jasper could be a happier man. The blanket of guilt that had shrouded Edmund would finally be lifted.
For now, there was a funeral to arrange, there was time to be taken off work, and a director to placate so he could start rebuilding his life.
He’d sent his mother a long text while Ovidia lay on the sofa.
I have a girlfriend; we’ve been together for four years. She hurt Jasper very badly.
It was juvenile yet strategic. Hopefully, by the time they’d see him next, his parents’ anger would have dissipated. He’d signed off, telling his mother not to phone him.
His phone beeped, a reply from his mother.
I swear you’ll never here the end of this! It said.
Why didn’t you tell me? The second message beeped.
Then the phone rang. His mother’s moniker blinking.
Edmund, for the first time in many years, deliberately switched his phone off.
‘It’s never going to be just us again,’ he said to Ovidia.
She nodded.
‘Oliver will always be with us,’ he continued, choking over Oliver’s name. ‘And there’s Jasper, and our parents, your sister.’
Ovidia snatched her hand away from his.
He looked at her.
‘We won’t tell them all about Oliver. We’ll come up with our own version of what happened — some things will have to remain between us,’ he said, and she took his hand again.
Edmund stroked Ovidia’s forehead, knowing he’d failed to accomplish what he’d hoped for — he wasn’t leaving her.
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
I'd like to thank
Samuli and Joona — my boys.
Anne Johnson and Trui Meyns, for being my first readers and for their friendship.
To Sam and Peyton, for helping turn my manuscript into a real novel.
And especially
Baba, Auntie Luo and Lord Lewis, it hurts that you'll never read this book.
But most of all to Jo — I did it, just like you said I could. I just wish you were here to read it.
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Table of Contents
Title Page
About the Author
The Pretenders – Agatha Zaza
Copyright
Dedication
Morning
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12
13
14
15
16
Afternoon
17
18
19
20
21
22
23
24
25
26
27
28
29
30
31
Evening
32
33
34
35
36
37
38
39
40
41
42
43
44
45
Acknowledgements
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