Seeing nothing but Red

by Jazzmine Mellodi

  With a giant and over exaggerated grumble, I slammed my chair back and huffed and puffed towards the door, i wanted to make the most out of this, slamming my hand on the handle , yanking it open and without even lookingI blurted out with a heat of anger “ I told you to not bother me unless it was an emergency” and breath. Wow i feel a lot better now, relaxing and opening my eyes, my jaw flew open.

  In Front of me stood mysterious redhead girl? Although she was standing right in front of me she hung her head low to the ground and that gorgeous fiery hair of hers swarmed her face, as if it was protecting her. Stuttering and relaxing my tone I spoke, “o..oh my, i’m so sorry , I assumed you were Polly my receptionist. Please come in and take a seat. May i get you a drink? Coffee/ Tea?” I was in a sudden panic, silence filled the air, making it thick and uncomfortable. “Water maybe?” Still silence. Was she deaf? I tell you what even if she was or wasn't deaf she was shaking like a leaf.

  Suddenly in the sweetest most innocent voice that had ever graced my ears i heard, “ i’m so..s.. Sorry i can go.” she turned still keeping her head down, please look up i have to see that face. I felt like a lion, trying to catch my pray but i just couldn't find it, i am frantically searching but i just need her to look at me. Look at me please. Placing my hand behind my head gently rubbing my neck in regret, wow i felt terrible. I insisted “ look ,i am sorry, please come have a seat , you're obviously here for a reason and i’d really like to hear it.” With that, she froze, as if she was contemplating not coming in, but she slowly turned in my direction. Taking everything i had, i resisted from touching her beautiful flaming red locks and tucking them behind her perfect little ears. As if reading my mind ,lifting her left hand she gently placed her silky red hair behind her ear, revealing flawless ivory skin and the deepest dark brown eye. Yep Eye. that's all i got an eye, the other was locked away under her curly flames.

  Suggesting her a seat she quickly sat down and i approached my chair but with second judgment, it was far too far away. For some odd reason i needed to be closer, so i stood there right in front of her, and gently lent against my desk folding my hands over my chest “ So, what do i owe this pleasure , Miss..? sorry i don't know your name, im Jackson by the way, Jackson Hale.” Focusing her eye on everything in my office but me she spoke up with more confidence than before, “ I'm Valentine, April Valentine. Look i don't want to waste anymore of your time, i was here yesterday and in the rush of getting home i must've left my sketchbook here. I’m sorry, it just means a lot to me. And i heard ,” the confidence rapidly escaped her as soon as she mentioned that sketchbook , her eye glassed over as if she was fighting back tears. “ i heard that you have it?”. I was torn, i wanted to swoop down and hold her small frame and pull her closer to me, take whatever was making her bottom lip tremble and make it better but then the other half of me was wondering why the hell did i even want to do that. I don't even know this girl , who even is April Valentine.

  April.

  Once Mr Hale Passed me my sketchbook, I felt a huge rush of relief passed over my body. Warmth flushed my cheeks and I was overwhelmed with happiness. Raising my right hand I tucked the rest of my hair behind my right ear so I could get a better look at my greatest possession. My last sketchbook. My only sketchbook.

  Whilst looking at my most cherished possession, I began tucking my hair out of my face. I turned to Mr Hale, and I thanked him, breaking my gaze away from my sketchbook I finally met Mr Hale's eyes for the first time. The Green eyes which looked as if there were looking past me and straight into my soul. Slowly consuming every part of me.

  However quickly the atmosphere changed, it grew dark and uneasy , worry spread across his face quicker than a bolt of lightning. He adjusted his suit, Clearing his throat “ Miss Valentine, is everything okay. Your cheek? Are you in trouble..” crap crap crap , quickly releasing my locks from behind my ear locking myself away again. I bolted for the door, frantically swinging it open, darting down the stairs , I ran across the foyer just about to reach the door when I was flying through the air? Yep i'm flying alright, my sketchbook being flung in the opposite direction and my side being crushed by that petite blonde girl from earlier. Unsure of what just happened i lay, motionless for what seemed like minutes but i doubt was even seconds. I scrambled to my knees, noticing my sketchbook spread across the whole foyer , my fall must have caused it to open and my drawings, my beautiful drawings were scattered everywhere.

  The petite blonde quickly crawled on her knees started picking the drawings up, making them into a neat pile. I couldn't move, I just was motionless. A hand touched my shoulder , causing me to spring to life. Panic hit me and I frantically picked up as many of my drawings as i could, tears had begun and i must of been causing a scene. I just wanted to be out of here.

  A gentle hand touched mine and an angelic voice whispered “ Hey, it's okay. Let me take these and let's go get a cup of coffee. You look like you need it” usually i would of ran. But I'd given up, rising to my feet I nodded my head and followed this angelic blonde to a small coffee shop across the road.

  As I sat in the little coffee shop, I was feeling embarrassed , I can't believe this was happening to me. I hadn't even been here a week and my secret was nearly revealed within seconds. I was losing control, losing control of myself, i was unraveling and I couldn't stop it. I wanted to cry , I wanted to scream from the top of my lungs. But most of all i wanted to hide, i wanted to lock the door and hide, out of sight and out of people's minds.

  That same soft hand touched mine again with a firm and comforting grip. “ its okay, your okay. I’m Polly. Your new around here aren't you?” I looked up into her welcoming face, she had the most honest and pure eyes. They must have been as blue as the ocean. With a half smile i said “ i’m April” with that she eagerly shuffled her chair closer. “ well April, i think i've just met my new best friend. You're going to be alright you know. Going to fit right in. hey how about we go shopping? There's no problem that can't be fixed with a little bit of shopping” i was hesitant after what had just happened, why would this girl want the likes of me to be hanging around with her? Without giving me time to accept she grabbed my hand. “Right come on let's go. You’ll love it I promise.” and with that we were out the door and walking towards the shopping center.

  Polly was right, shopping really does fix everything. Well actually it hadn't fixed anything but going with Polly has made my day better. If i hadn't of gone shopping with Polly i would've just hid at home and thrown a self pity party. Polly dragged me around every store, making sure I knew what all the shops had inside. We had finished off in a clothes store, i sat whilst Polly tried on some gorgeous dresses. She was one of those girls who looked effortlessly perfect in anything she wore. She said she had a hot date tonight, with a guy called Tommy! Apparently they had a fling during school but it all ended badly at prom. She didn't go into it much I could tell there was something there that was bringing back bad memories.

  After polly bought 6 outfits, we made our way back to the town. Everything around here was so close to each other, was nice being able to just walk and be at your destination within minutes. Polly kindly invited me round to her apartment to help her get ready but I politely declined. It was nice of her to offer but today had been such a rollercoaster of emotions I was looking forward to my nice calm, drama free evening at home. By myself.

  I had been home 40 minutes, changed into my short shorts and a baggy t-shirt and was getting ready to relax on the sofa and watch some tv. I had just gotten comfy and was endlessly searching the channels when i heard a knock on the door. Who could that be ? my brother had a key and he wouldn't bother knocking anyway. Should I answer it? Worry filled me as I was unsure who was on the other side of the door. The Knock grew louder. So pulling my big girl panties up i walked to the door, deep breath , deep breath. Unlocking all the bolts i opened the door.

  Jackson.

  What even happened earlier, this whole day seems to of been one big blur. Drama after
drama. But I can't wrap my head around what had occurred in my office or after it for them matters. One good thing to come out of today was that my mysterious red head’s face had been revealed. But what I discovered hadn't been quite what I'd imagined.

  As i was lent against my desk, I remember studying her face as if i was an artist trying to consume every fine detail, her lips were rosy pink and looked invitingly soft. I longed to touch them , kiss them , i wanted to rub the tip of my thumb along the curve of the bottom of her lip as I softly tease her with my touch. Working my way up I found hidden amongst the purest ivory skin was a small dimple. I bit my lip this girl was doing things to my mind and my body, and I was really struggling to keep any self control. As I worked my way up her face to meet her eyes, my heart had stopped, my thoughts sunk and I got angry.

  Angry at whoever had caused what I was looking at, angry at whoever thought it would be acceptable to lay a finger on a women. Let alone her, she was precious and the thought, the thought of someone doing her harm, made me want to do unthinkable things.

  Standing up and straightening my suit, trying to shake off some of this anger before i scared her, again, no wonder she was shaking after i shouted at her earlier for simply knocking on my door. I was an asshole, a really mean asshole.

  I looked down into her eyes trying to read her face, she looked worried, and before thinking i asked, well tried to ask if she was okay or in trouble but halfway through my sentence she got up and bolted. She practically flew down the stairs, I slowly followed her not wanting to spook her anymore but by the time I got to the lobby, i was watching a car crash before my eyes. April and Polly collided. And that sketchbook she was so clearly eager to get hold off flew in the air and scattered all over the foyer. Although Polly is a petite little lady , she sure can pack a punch so when i noticed Polly still standing and April on the floor i made a sensible decision to let Polly deal with the situation. I’d already caused enough damage.

  I spent the rest of the afternoon restless and grouchy. I paced up and down my office, relentlessly trying to get Miss Valentine out of my head. The not knowing why her cheek was so bruised was driving me insane. I also had a deep amount of worry for her, because of the way she was shaking when I shouted at her, what had caused her to be that frightened and fearful.

  Also after all that agro she went through to get her beloved sketchbook back from me, and then to see her fall apart downstairs in the foyer when it scattered everywhere nearly broke me. I saw myself in her, Lost and hurt. That was me, right after I'd been told my mum had been found dead in the nearby park. She had hung herself, apparently anyway. Something about the whole way she was found didn't quite add up for me but then that's me probably just trying to deal with the fact that she had given up and left me.

  I can understand why it could of gotten too much, it was no secret that our life wasn't all sunshine and daisies. But still she left me. And straight after i mean hours after the police had knocked on the door and regretfully unloaded this information on me and my dad, the man packed his stuff and left. Jack daniels in one hand and bag in the other. Don't get me wrong, he was a nasty man, gambled away any of our profits, borrowed money from some shady people to gamble some more and drank till he needed another drink.

  But the fact he had left, as if he was leaving a hotel rather than a home, he left leaving me on my own at 16 years old. With a failing hotel in my hands.

  I was a mess, I was drowning in my new come responsibilities and i was sinking even faster in my emotions, my pain, my hurt often found me breaking down in the darkest of places. So when I saw Miss Valentine fall apart in my hotel , it had affected me more than it should have done.

  Lacey texted me earlier saying she was going down to her mums for a week, She often did this after a fight. Think she was under the impression it would make me miss her but I actually liked it, I liked it a lot.

  After leaving my office early evening, as let's be honest, today has been quite eventful so i think it's best I left early today, to avoid any more drama if i could. Walking to the car park down the road to collect my car, i know the hotel has its own carpark now but i guess old habits die hard. I’ve always since i was young parked in this carpark and for some odd reason I couldn't kick the habit. Plus it was nice to get some fresh air and clear my head after a day's work.

  Because I'd left the office early , all the shops along the high street were still open, I was casually window shopping whilst making my way down to the car when i noticed a gorgeous leather back sketchbook. My thoughts quickly returned to my mysterious redhead called April Valentine. Her face when she saw her sketchbook scattered everywhere was all that I could see, and without thinking acting purely on impulse I walked into the art store and purchased the Golden brown leatherback Sketchbook. Embroidered on the back was a small bird, it reminded me of my mother.

  Continuing my lack of self control i made my way to sunset row. Houses round here didn't go up for sale often and there were only two which she could likely be living in.

  Taking a deep breath I tried my luck with the first one, it was small and apart from the decking needing a fresh lick of paint it was simply beautiful.

  With a Confident knock at the door, I anxiously waited to see my fate, Was this her house or was I crazy? Am I crazy anyway, it's a quarter to six and I'm standing on a stranger's porch, waiting for a stranger to answer the door so I can give them a gift.

  I honestly don't know what I'm doing half the time or even why I'm doing it in the first place.

  All my worries about my sanity disappeared when I heard the sound of what seemed like 20 locks being unbolted and then the door slowly creep open, god she was magnificent. There she stood , right in front of me, as I looked at her from head to toe, it was the beauty of her legs that continued to linger in my head,that innocent thought was soon overtaken by the thought of her wrapping them long legs around my waist as i.. “W..what are you doing here?” the sound of her angelic voice soon interrupted my sinful thoughts. “You can't be here you have to go, if my brother..” she soon stopped whatever she was saying as if she had said too much already. And with that she slammed the door and i heard the bolts lock one by one. All together there were six i counted, well six that I had heard.

  I just stood there, completely bewildered by the reception I had just received. I’d gone out of my way to do something nice and this is how I was repaid. Feeling frustrated sexually and mentally I took out my pen, opening the sketchbook. I wrote

  “ Here is a new sketchbook, i thought you may need one after what happened today. Hopefully this one means as much to you as the last did. Take Care , Mr J.Hale”

  Leaving the sketchbook on the front step and returning to my car. I made my way home hoping to put this dreadful day behind me.

  April

  When I opened my door the last thing i ever expected to see was Mr Hale. He looked just as gorgeous as earlier today when I laid my eyes on him for the first time. Ever since he had etched his way into my mind, I have found myself thinking about him on more than one occasion this afternoon. Maybe not for all the same reasons partly worry he was going to work out how i got that bruise under my eye and the other was, well, him. He seemed to be chiseled to perfection, he was about six foot tall maybe taller,, his body hugged his crisp white shirt revealing muscles that I was trying my hardest not to reach over and touch. His eyes were inviting and they consumed every part of me , leaving me vulnerable. He made my palms go sweaty and my heart race. I couldn't understand this effect he was having on me, i’d met plenty of guys before so why was Mr. Hale any different.

  Once opening the door I was feeling flustered ,confused , scared to how he found me and what his intentions were. I stuttered to get my words out, and then all of a sudden I was throwing them out there all at once “ what are you doing here?” he took a deep breath as if he was about to explain but sheer terror ripped through my body, if my brother knew for one minute that there was a man here, he would be angry and he may even
be too angry with me and end up hurting or involving Mr Hale into my nightmare. The last thing I would wish on anyone is to be the wrath of my brothers anger. So without thinking , my mind traveling at two hundred miles an hour I blurted “You can't be here you have to go, if my brother..” and with that sentence I had said too much. Way too much and i was such a fucking idiot. Why did i say that. Panic hit me. I slammed the door shut bolting all the locks, and I dropped to the floor.

  Trying to calm my breathing, my pulse, my hands from quickly unlocking the door and running after him and finding out the reason he was here anyway. I needed to stop panicking because it was taking over every fibre in my body and I was beginning to lose control. I have gone through this a few times in my life, they are this little pleasure I experience called a panic attack, and unless I really am able to calm myself down , I go fully into i can't breath mode and then i feel like i'm going to die because i can't breath and it's all just a massive pain in the ass. I end up feeling so rotten so i really do try to calm myself before it gets to this stage.

  Luckily after an hour passed I was feeling slightly more sane again, and back in control. I picked myself up off the floor and gave up watching tv which id been really looking forward to doing and made my way to bed. I needed sleep and knowing my brother wasn't going to be here tonight meant i was safe, for now.

  A sudden bang and the sound of raised voices woke me , a raised voice I knew all too well, Tys Voice. I could feel the anger in the air, suffocating me instantly . “ I CAN'T FUCKING BELIEVE THIS, I LEAVE FOR ONE NIGHT AND THIS , HE WAS HERE, IF STAN FINDS OUT , THERE GOING TO BE HELL TO PAY. APRIL! APRIL!! WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU APRIL!” and with that my bedroom door flew open, rage pierced through his body, hi lifted his heavily muscled arm and threw a book at me “ WHAT THE HELL IS THAT ? HOW DO YOU KNOW JACKSON HALE APRIL? Tell me now how the fuck do you know Jackson Hale?” half asleep and afraid to even breath i froze, i didn't know what to say. Because i didn't know Jackson Hale, I only met him once and we barely even spoke. With my hesitation, Ty slammed my head down on the bed edging his body closer and I could feel the hot breath seeping down my ear, smelling the stench of vodka coming from his breath. “ he whispered heavily “ if i find him near this house or near you. And if you speak to him ever again, you're going to be responsible for what happens. It’ll be on you kid!” he turned and stomped out of my bedroom, and then i heard the slam of pure force seep through the walls as he shut his bedroom door.