by Sue MacKay
Finally the tears slowed, stopped. Her heart felt lighter and yet nothing had changed. The house was still a wreck. Jackson would still return to Hong Kong. He might’ve said he was staying but she couldn’t take a chance on that. Time to toughen up. She pulled away, moved to stand in the middle of the room, the photo still in her hand. Wiping her other hand over her cheeks, she told him, ‘Thank you. As if there isn’t already enough water around the place.’
Jackson winced, but he didn’t turn round and hightail it out of her house. ‘Let’s see what we can save. Throw anything not ruined into the truck and take it back to Mum’s to clean before storing. Then we’ll check out Mrs Harrop’s place.’
It was a plan and she desperately needed something to focus on. Nodding, she walked through to her bedroom and stared around. Looked at the bed where she’d had so much fun with Jackson. Her wardrobe door stood ajar, her shoes everywhere. Bending down, she picked up one of the apricot silk pair she’d worn at the wedding. ‘Ruined. But I guess they’re only shoes.’
She didn’t realise Jackson had followed her until he said, ‘No such thing as only shoes for women.’ When she looked up, he gave her a coaxing smile. ‘I’ll take you shopping when we’ve had time to work out what’s going to happen with all this.’
That’s what she’d said about Nicholas’s things. Throw ’em out and get new ones. That didn’t seem so easy now. ‘I’ll get some bags to put things in.’
‘Have you called your insurance company yet?’ Jackson seemed determined to stick with her.
‘Hardly. Too busy yesterday and it’s still too early today.’ Where were those large black bin liners? They’d be perfect for the damp clothes she needed to take away for washing.
‘Jess.’ Jackson stood beside her as she poked through a drawer of sodden plastic bags and cling wrap.
‘Here we are.’ She snatched up the roll and kneed the drawer closed.
‘Jess.’ A little louder. And when she turned to head to Nicholas’s bedroom he put both hands on her shoulders. ‘Jess, I don’t know if this is the right time to tell you but I love you.’
‘Right.’ He loves me. That’s got to be good. But it doesn’t fix a thing. I need to sort clothes and stuff before the day gets started and I have to go to work.
Those big hands gripping her gave her a gentle shake. ‘I am not going back to Hong Kong. I’m here to stay.’
‘That’s good. We need another doctor in the bay. Rory’s busting to go live with his girlfriend in Auckland.’ See, some things did work out if everyone was patient.
Her foot nudged something in the mud covering the floor. Bending down, she retrieved Nicholas’s stuffed giraffe, Long Neck. The original yellow and black colours looked decidedly worse for their night in the mud. ‘This is one of Nicholas’s favourites.’ She dropped it into one of the black bags.
Jackson took the roll of bags and tore off a couple. ‘I’ll deal with Nicholas’s room if you like, while you go through your drawers and wardrobe.’ He sounded very upbeat. Why? It wasn’t like she’d acknowledged his statement.
Some time later she wound a plastic tie around the neck of the last full bag from her room and dumped it on the bed, on top of the beautiful quilt that apparently Sasha’s grandmother had made years ago. Jess considered it antique and now it was destined for the trash. What a shame. Hands on hips, she stood at the end of the bed and looked around at what had been her pride and joy. She’d painted the whole place, but here in her bedroom she’d let loose with her creative side, buying beautiful little knick knacks for the top of her dressing table, bedside lamps that matched colours in the quilt and the curtains she’d made. She’d been so damned proud of those curtains and now look at them—sodden, muddy and hanging all askew.
Water dripped onto her breasts. Tears? Surely she’d run out by now. Apparently not. They didn’t stop. Her hands began shaking and she had to grip her hips tight to keep them under some sort of control.
‘Hey, you’re crying.’ Jackson suddenly appeared before her with a box of tissues that was miraculously dry. ‘Here, let me.’ Oh, so gently he sponged up the tears, only to have to repeat the exercise again and again.
Her bottom lip trembled. ‘I know it’s only little, and very ordinary, but this is my home. I made it how I wanted it to be, a place for Nicholas to grow up in feeling secure and loved. I’ve been happy here, settled for the very first time in my life.’
Those long, strong fingers touched her cheeks, lifted her face so she had to look into his eyes. ‘You think that you’ve lost all that because your house is a write-off?’
Her head dipped in acknowledgement. That’s what she’d been trying to say, yes.
‘Sweetheart, the love that permeates this home doesn’t come from the paint and curtains and flower vases and books on the shelves. It comes from in here.’ He tapped her chest gently, right against her heart. ‘From within you. That love goes where you go. It’s who you are, and always will be. Nicholas is going to be secure and loved by you all his life, even though he mightn’t grow up in this particular home. Even when he eventually heads out into the world on his own, he’ll know you love him. Whether you get this place put back together or buy another one with the insurance money, it will be filled with your personality, your love, fun and laughter.’
For Jackson that had to be a record speech. She blinked as the tight knots in her tummy began letting go some tension. The trembling in her hands eased, stopped. ‘You really, really think so?’ she whispered.
‘I know so.’ His head lowered so that his mouth was close to hers. ‘I really, really know.’ Then he kissed her. A quiet kiss filled with understanding, with that love he’d not long ago declared, with his generosity. He was giving her something back after all that had been taken from her since the moment he’d walked out of her life three days ago. ‘I love you,’ he murmured against her mouth.
Jess leaned forward so that her breasts were crushed against his chest, her mouth kissed his in return, her hands finally lifted from her hips to his neck and held onto him. ‘I don’t know what to do. I love you so much and yet I can’t ask you to stay. You hate it here.’
‘I’m staying. End of story. I don’t hate it here any more. You taught me what this community is all about.’
‘Me? How?’ Surprise rocked through her. ‘All I do is try and make up for the mistakes I made when I was young and in need of friends who’d love me.’
‘Jess, Jess, you don’t get it. Yesterday, when you were dealt a blow here, what did you do? Stand around bemoaning your bad luck? Not likely. You went out caring for other people. That’s community spirit in spades.’
‘I’m a nurse. That’s what nurses do.’
And right on cue her work phone beeped. ‘Jessica, I think my waters just broke.’
‘Lynley? Is that you?’
‘Yes. Ouch. That wasn’t nice. I’m having some light pains every ten minutes or so. Guess this is it. Do I go to the centre now?’
A grim smile twisted her mouth. ‘You can wait until those contractions are closer, about six minutes between them. Unless it’s going to be difficult getting there after yesterday’s flood, then I’d suggest making your way there now.’ It was going to take some effort for her to get there given the road this side of town had been underwater last night.
‘It’s a clear run from here. What about you?’ Lynley asked.
‘I’ll be there as soon as possible. You concentrate on that baby’s arrival.’ She closed the phone and glanced at Jackson, to find him watching her closely.
‘Guess we’re headed for town, then. Have you got time to pick up some breakfast from Mum’s first?’
‘The baby’s not rushing but I have no idea if the road is manageable.’ And why are you coming with me?
‘Let’s go and find out.’ He took the bags of clothes she’d dumped on th
e bed and headed out to the truck he’d borrowed.
Nothing else for her to do but follow.
* * *
When Jackson had seen Jess’s shocked reaction to the state of her home he had wanted to pick her up, hold her close and transport her away from it all. He’d wanted to run her a hot bubble bath and let her soak away her desolation. Not that she’d have let him if he’d even tried. Had she heard him say he loved her? Really heard? Or had his declaration been like words on the wind? Not connecting with her?
He’d been disappointed at her lack of reaction but he figured it had been the wrong time. At least, if she knew how he felt she’d know she wasn’t on her own with this. Not that she was. Mum and Dad had had to be restrained from rushing over the moment they’d known where she’d gone this morning. Only by explaining that he’d be helping Jess and that he wanted to tell her why he was home had he managed to make them stay put.
He pressed some numbers on his phone, got hold of Jonty at the fire station. ‘Hey, man, how’s our road this morning? Is it passable? Jess has a patient in labour in town.’
‘It’s open but slippery as hell. There’s a temporary fix where the road was washed away. Don’t let her drive that thing she calls a car. It won’t hold on the tarmac.’
‘That thing, as you put it, has been submerged most of the night. It’s not going anywhere.’ He didn’t know if Jess had looked in her garage yet, and he’d try to keep her out of there for now.
Jonty groaned. ‘Jess has had more than her share of knocks in this flood.’
‘She sure has. I’m heading in with her so if anyone needs a doctor over the next few hours I’ll be at the medical centre.’ He snapped the phone shut, went to find Jess. ‘Road’s open so let’s grab some breakfast and take it with us. We can leave those bags of your belongings at the house.’ Mum would probably have everything washed by the time Jess got back.
‘You’re coming with me? It’s a normal birth, Jackson.’
‘Sure, but I might be of use at the centre. Besides, there’re enough people milling around at home to drive me to drink. It’s too soon to start clearing the orchards, so I’m superfluous.’ I want to be with you, supporting you, because I don’t believe you’re totally back on your feet as far as the shock is concerned.
She flicked him a brief smile. ‘You’re starting to think like a local. You know that?’
‘If you’d said that two months ago I’d have run for the hills.’
‘Didn’t you do just that three days ago? Figuratively speaking.’ Those eyes that always got to him were totally focused on him right now.
‘Guilty as charged.’ His stomach clenched, relaxed. Of course she’d want to take a crack at him. He’d hurt her by leaving like he had. Somehow he was going to make that up to her. But he wasn’t barrelling in on this one. They had their whole lives ahead of them. He’d take it slower than he was used to doing with anything.
Parking outside Mum and Dad’s house, he pulled on the handbrake. ‘I’ll tell you something. What you just said about me thinking like a local made me feel warm and fuzzy, not cold and panicked. Guess I’m improving.’
Jess actually chuckled. There was even a hint of mischief in her eyes. ‘Watch this space. You’ll be standing for mayor before we know it.’
‘Get outta here.’ Not that Golden Bay had a mayor. There were plenty of people who liked to think they were running the district, but official business was down over the hill.
‘Don’t let me forget my kit.’ She dropped to the ground and reached into the back for two bags. ‘Wonder if any of the beach houses are vacant.’
‘You thinking of renting one for a while?’
She nodded. ‘Got to find somewhere to live fairly quickly.’
Now he had something practical he could do for the woman he loved. ‘Leave it with me. I’ll ring round, or go online, while you’re bringing that baby into this wet world.’
Her gaze lit up as she looked skyward. ‘The sun’s peeking out, most of the sky’s blue, and the rain has stopped everywhere.’
And Jess had started looking a tiny bit more relaxed. Relief nearly made him swing her up in his arms to kiss her soft lips. But as his foot came off the ground to move towards her, caution held him back. Patience, man, patience. Do not rush her. Not today, anyway. He smiled and lifted out two more heavy bags of damp belongings before following that gorgeous butt inside.
* * *
Virginia handed her a steaming mug of tea even before she’d got her boots off. ‘Here you go, Jess. Get that in you. I tried to get you to have one before you left at sun-up but you weren’t hearing anything.’
Jess apologised. ‘I had my mind on my home, nothing else.’
‘That’s what I thought.’ Virginia’s arm draped around her shoulders. ‘You and Nicholas stay here for as long as it takes to sort everything out. No arguments.’
‘I’m not arguing. I’m just too exhausted to do anything much about finding somewhere to live today. So, thanks very much.’ She laid her cheek against the other woman’s arm for a moment, absorbing the warmth and care. ‘Thank you,’ she whispered again.
Jackson strolled through the farmhouse-sized kitchen and smiled at her and his mother. ‘We’re heading into town shortly. Anyone here who needs to go that way?’ He was definitely sounding more and more like most of the other caring people in the district.
Virginia dropped her arm and handed Jackson a mug. ‘Not that I know of. Want to take some food with you? Can’t imagine any shops being open today.’
Ten minutes later Jess sat in the passenger seat watching Jackson skilfully negotiate a small washout just past her house. ‘It could take months to get everything back to normal.’
Her work phone buzzed in her pocket. ‘Hey, Lynley, that you?’
‘My contractions are down to five minutes apart and we’re waiting at the birthing unit.’
‘Nearly there.’ She closed the phone. ‘That girl is so calm for a first baby.’
‘What were you like when you had Nicholas?’
‘Terrible. My baby was the first baby ever to be born. No one could’ve possibly understood what I was going through. I’m surprised I had any friends left by the time I’d finished.’ She grinned. ‘Labour hurts, big time. And mine went on for thirty-one hours. I swear it’s the only time Nicholas has been late for anything.’
‘Would you do it again?’
Talk about a loaded question. ‘You going somewhere with this?’
‘Yep.’ He slowed behind a tractor towing a trailer laden with broken trees. Driving patiently, he kept back from the mud sent into the air by the trailer wheels. ‘I’d love to have kids.’
And that had something to do with her? Though he had said he loved her—three times. ‘Yeah, I’d do it again. The pain’s quickly forgotten when you hold your baby in your arms for the first time.’
Jackson didn’t say any more, just concentrated on getting them through the mud and debris littering what used to be a perfectly good road.
The medical centre was surprisingly quiet. ‘I think everyone’s too busy cleaning up to be bothered with visiting us,’ Mike theorised, when they tramped inside with their plastic box of breakfast.
‘Where are Lynley and Trevor?’ she asked.
‘Over in the maternity wing.’
Jackson continued walking through the centre. ‘I’m over there if you find you’re suddenly rushed off your feet, Mike.’
‘You don’t have to come with me.’ Jess hurried after Jackson.
‘I’ll make breakfast.’
‘You have an answer for everything,’ she muttered under her breath.
He leaned close, placed a soft kiss on her cheek. ‘Better get used to that.’
Lynley had already changed into a loose-fitting hospital gown. ‘Can�
�t stand anything constricting me at the moment,’ she told Jess the moment she turned into the birthing room. ‘Ahh, Trevor, hold me.’ Her pretty face contorted as vice-like pain caught her.
Trevor stood rock solid as his wife clung to him, his hands around her waist. ‘Glad you got through, Jess. I heard about your place being flooded. Hope it’s going to be all right. If there’s anything I can do, give me a call, okay?’
‘Thanks. It’s too soon to know what’ll happen with it. This is Jackson Wilson. He’s an emergency doctor and, no, Lynley you’re not having an emergency.’
Jackson waved a hand at the couple. ‘If you don’t want me hanging around just say so, otherwise I’m here to watch and learn.’
When the contraction had passed Jess indicated for Lynley to sit back on the bed and then wrapped the blood-pressure cuff around the mother-to-be’s arm. ‘Baseline obs first and then I’ll listen to baby’s heartbeat.’
‘Any idea how long this is going to take?’ Lynley asked.
‘It’s like the piece of string. Every baby is different. Your BP’s good.’ She listened through the stethoscope to the baby’s heartbeats, counting silently. ‘All good there, too.’
‘Now we wait, right?’ Trevor said.
‘We certainly do. And be grateful that wee boy didn’t decide yesterday was the day to arrive.’ Jess sat on a low stool and filled in patient observations.
Jackson said, ‘I’ll make our breakfast. Can I get you anything Lynley? Trevor?’
Another contraction, and again Trevor held Lynley. And again. Jackson returned from the kitchen with a tray laden with toast and jam, and four cups of coffee. More contractions, more observations noted on the page. The morning groaned past and Lynley began to get tired.
‘I’m fed up with this pain,’ she yelled once.
‘Why did you get me pregnant?’ she demanded of Trevor another time. ‘Do you know what you’re putting me through?’