‘She was OK after the shock. She thinks we should wait until Sunday to tell my da, so that I can leave for Dublin afterwards because he will go berserk.’ She didn’t tell him that Carmel had, surprisingly, declared that rushing into marriage was not the course of action to take.
Her mother had broached the subject again when they’d gone for a driving practice earlier in the day before going to Mount Usher Gardens. Carmel had said very frankly that she had married Terence to get away from home and to escape looking after her father and brothers. It was the biggest mistake of her life and if she had her life over again she would not repeat it. An unhappy marriage was a hard cross to bear for both her and Terence, she’d admitted. She didn’t want Valerie to end up unhappy by rushing into marriage because she was pregnant. Valerie was astonished at her mother’s directness. Carmel had always been very private about the state of her marriage. Valerie had assured her that her relationship with Jeff was different and had changed the subject. She did not want to hear this type of talk. It was too unsettling.
Valerie felt that if she gave Jeff any leeway in the marriage department he’d take it like a drowning man grasping at a life raft. It was a thought she tried hard to ignore. She just couldn’t face the long lonely road ahead without him.
‘I told my folks,’ he sighed.
‘What did they say?’ she asked warily. She was sure Tessa Egan was far from impressed with the news.
‘Ah . . . not much. They were a bit shocked and disappointed. You know yourself.’ He shrugged. ‘Dad was calmer than Mam. She was a bit . . . er . . . put out.’
I bet she was, thought Valerie. ‘Well, my da won’t be calm, that’s for sure, just to warn you,’ she said emphatically. ‘Should we talk to the priest about the wedding?’ she ventured.
‘I suppose we should,’ Jeff said unenthusiastically. ‘But we should wait until we’ve told your da.’
‘He’ll want us to get married as soon as possible, I know that.’ Valerie slanted a glance up at him.
‘Right,’ he said, staring out at the horizon.
‘Jeff, please talk to me,’ she pleaded. ‘You’re so cool and distant. It’s scaring me.’ Tears brimmed in her eyes.
‘Oh, don’t cry, Val,’ he groaned, putting his arms around her. ‘I just feel a bit overwhelmed by it all. I can’t imagine being a father and having a baby to look after.’
‘I can’t imagine being a mother,’ she said into his neck.
‘We have a lot of decisions to make.’ He buried his face in her hair.
‘I know.’ He was struggling just like she was, she reminded herself. It was all new to him too. They held each other tightly as the wind whipped the sand around their ankles and the waves crashed in on the beach, pounding the shore in fury.
‘Oh, look.’ Valerie pointed out to sea where a rainbow arched across the sky in glorious Technicolor splendour. ‘What a gorgeous rainbow.’
‘Just for us.’ Jeff smiled down at her and put his arm around her shoulder and they stood in silence looking at nature’s magnificent spectacle. Valerie snuggled in against him, glad that they had acknowledged their fears, at least, and wishing that the ordeal of telling her father was behind them.
‘What’s she bringing that fella here for?’ Terence grumbled as he saw Valerie and Jeff walking hand in hand towards the house. He was just about to sit down with a cup of tea and the Sunday paper while Carmel prepared the roast dinner.
‘Just be polite, Terence. Manners cost nothing,’ Carmel said exasperatedly.
Terence looked at her. She was in one of her odd moods again. Edgy, he decided. Best to keep out of her way and let her get on with things. She had been in bed when he’d got home tired and hungry from his extra long day at work on Friday night and he’d had to heat up his own dinner. And then, yesterday she’d gone driving with Valerie and they hadn’t come back for ages, and he’d had to have a fish-and-chip dinner, and, to add insult to injury, she’d told him to go and get it himself. Definitely edgy stuff, Terence decided, opening the paper at the sports pages.
‘Dad?’ Valerie stood in the door with the Egan chap behind her.
‘Ah. Hello. Nice day out there; better than yesterday, anyway,’ he said, remembering his wife’s exhortations.
‘We’ve something to tell you.’ Valerie was ashen-faced, he noticed, and the Egan fella didn’t look much better.
‘What’s that, then?’ Terence felt a sudden trepidation. This was not good news of any description, he knew by their demeanour.
‘We’re going to have a baby.’ Jeff put his arm protectively around Valerie.
Terence felt the way he’d felt when Brenda Ryan’s father had called him a cur and told him never to set foot on his dairy farm again. Worthless. Helpless. Furious. Inadequate. Panic-stricken. Slowly he put his paper down. He wanted to jump to his feet and roar at her. He wanted to call her a slut, a whore, a tramp. A stupid little fool. He’d done his best for her, offered her a university education, and she’d turned her back on him with a sneer on her face and now look at her, up the duff, with no chance of bettering herself. Valerie Harris, Terence Harris’s daughter, who couldn’t keep her legs together, that’s what they’d be saying in the bingo hall. The ould ones would be saying, ‘She went before the whistle.’ He knew what they were like, gossiping in the bingo hall. It would be the Harrises that would bear the brunt of the gossip. That snooty bitch Tessa Egan wouldn’t have her nose rubbed in it like Carmel and himself would. A cold rage enveloped him. He stood up and pointed his finger at Jeff.
‘Have you told your parents?’ He glowered at him, ignoring his daughter.
‘Yes, I have.’
‘And what did they have to say?’
‘They weren’t too pleased,’ he muttered.
‘Well, we’re going to your house now to sort this out. Carmel,’ he yelled.
‘I’m here,’ his wife said from the doorway. ‘There’s no need to shout, Terence. Shouting won’t help the situation.’ She was pale but composed.
‘Oh, so you know, do you? Well, get your coat. We’re going up to this fella’s family, and we’re going to make sure he does the right thing by her.’ He looked at Valerie as if she had crawled out from under a rock.
‘I’ve every intention of marrying Valerie, Mr Harris,’ Jeff said quietly.
‘Oh, indeed you have, sonny. Make no mistake about it, the pair of you will be up that aisle before you know it.’
‘No, Terence—’
‘Get your coat, Carmel,’ Terence gritted.
‘Dad, it’s not a good time—’
‘I don’t want to hear a word out of you, miss. Keep your trap shut the way you didn’t keep your legs shut,’ Terence snapped at her.
‘Terence, do not speak to Valerie like that.’ Carmel was crimson with annoyance and embarrassment.
‘We could meet in the hotel in an hour’s time, if that would suit you. My mother will be getting the Sunday lunch now,’ Jeff said tightly.
‘Sonny, we won’t be having any public meeting in any hotel,’ Terence said truculently, barging past him. ‘Now the pair of ye follow me up to your house and let’s have no more discussion.’
‘Oh Jesus!’ Valerie whispered, afraid she was going to puke.
‘We’d better get it over with,’ Jeff growled. ‘If he calls me “sonny” once more, I’ll deck him,’ he muttered to Valerie, and didn’t care if Terence heard him.
‘I’ll just go and turn down the oven.’ Carmel’s lips were a thin line as she walked past her husband.
‘Go on, you pair, and tell the Egans that we’re on our way.’ Terence opened the front door and was tempted to kick the two of them in the ass as they walked out past him.
‘Don’t you make a disgrace of us with the Egans,’ Carmel warned him as she slid into her Sunday coat. ‘And don’t for God’s sake make vulgar remarks about our daughter.’
‘I’ll say what has to be said,’ Terence retorted furiously. ‘And you make sure to back me up.’
‘I’ll have my own say, Terence. Now come on and get this ordeal over with,’ his wife said curtly and he followed her out, wondering what she meant by that.
He followed Valerie’s Mini through the village, his thoughts racing. If she got married as soon as possible it would take some of the sting out of the sorry mess she, and now they, were in. At least she’d be living up in Dublin so she wouldn’t be parading her shame around the village. At least that was some small mercy.
And he wouldn’t be taking any nonsense from that Tessa Egan. It was her son who had got his daughter into trouble; he wouldn’t be letting her forget it. She needn’t look down her snooty nose at him and his family. Terence’s hands tightened on the wheel as he prepared himself for the battle to come.
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
‘Oh Lord, Jeff never told me he was bringing her here today,’ Tessa groused as she saw Valerie’s Mini turning into the drive. The mushy peas had just boiled over in a green foamy spume on top of the cooker and that in itself had put her into a bad mood. Now she was going to have to deal with Jeff’s pregnant girlfriend.
‘Now, Tessa, be kind,’ Lorcan admonished from the table where he was hulling strawberries.
‘Jesus, Mary and Joseph, Lorcan. Her parents are with them!’ Tessa exclaimed in dismay as she saw the Harrises’ car pull up outside their garden.
‘The word is out,’ Lorcan said wryly.
‘The feckin’ nerve of them, coming up here without a by-your-leave,’ Tessa bristled. ‘The lunch will be ruined if I have to go entertaining them. They might have had the manners to phone and arrange to meet, instead of arriving unannounced.’
‘The lunch will be grand. Turn off the peas and the spuds, and turn down the oven,’ Lorcan said calmly as he shook caster sugar over the strawberries and placed them in the fridge. ‘I’ll show the Harrises into the sitting room.’
‘I hope they don’t come in the back, I hope Jeff has that much cop on. I’ll kill him,’ Tessa fumed. ‘And I hope we won’t have to listen to any old guff from that Harris fella.’ She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, turned off the cooker, and saw with relief that her son was leading his unwelcome guests to the front door.
‘Don’t lose the cool, Tessa. Remember, least said soonest mended,’ Lorcan threw over his shoulder as he went out to the hall. ‘Hello, Valerie, come in,’ she heard him say kindly, and she wished she could be as composed as he was. She would not let the Harrises see that she was rattled, she resolved, catching sight of her flushed face in the small mirror over the fireplace.
Tessa took a deep breath and went out to the hall. The first person she saw was Valerie, looking drawn and apprehensive, hardly able to meet her eyes. Not looking so cocky today, are we? she thought nastily as she swept a glance over her. ‘Hello, Valerie,’ she said coolly. ‘Go in and sit down. Jeff, go and put the kettle on.’
‘OK,’ he muttered. ‘Sorry about this. He,’ Jeff jerked his thumb over his shoulder, ‘wouldn’t wait. I did try to put him off or say we’d meet in the hotel later but he insisted on coming.’
‘Did he now?’ Tessa retorted.
‘Carmel, Terence, come in,’ she heard her husband say in his calm tones, and was so glad he was here to stand by Jeff’s side.
She saw Carmel’s pinched white face, her eyes dark with trepidation. Despite her anger and indignation she felt sorry for Valerie’s mother. It wasn’t the poor woman’s fault that her daughter had got pregnant and that she had a boor for a husband.
‘Come in, Carmel. Let me take your coat and go in and sit down,’ she said politely.
‘Thank you, Tessa. I’m sorry for springing this visit on you. I hope it’s not putting you out. You were probably getting the lunch,’ Carmel said, clearly uncomfortable as she divested herself of her coat.
‘I was but it will wait.’ She glared at Valerie’s father. ‘Hello, Terence,’ she greeted him, her voice a couple of degrees cooler.
‘Tessa.’ Terence was equally cool.
‘Tea or coffee?’ Lorcan interjected, following them into the sitting room.
‘No, no, nothing like that,’ Terence said brusquely. ‘This isn’t a social visit, as I’m sure you know.’
‘There’s nothing like a cup of tea to ease the chat,’ Lorcan said evenly. ‘Carmel, will you have a cuppa? Valerie?’ He raised an eyebrow at her.
‘Thank you, Lorcan. I’ll join you in one,’ Carmel said quietly, ignoring the daggers looks her husband was giving her.
‘Grand. And Tessa and I will have one too. Valerie, why don’t you give Jeff a hand out in the kitchen, and we’ll sort things out over the tea?’ he suggested. Valerie took up his suggestion with alacrity and hurried out to join her boyfriend.
‘You have a lovely view, Tessa,’ Carmel observed as she sat on the edge of the sofa and stared out of the French windows.
‘We didn’t come here to talk about views,’ Terence blustered. ‘Now your son has got my daughter pregnant and I’m here to see that he’s going to do the right thing by her.’
‘Jeff has every intention of fulfilling his responsibilities and doing the right thing by Valerie, be assured of that, Terence,’ Lorcan said in a voice of quiet authority.
‘Right then, well, we better discuss wedding plans.’ Terence sat down beside Carmel. ‘I’m not going to spend a fortune on it, just so as you know.’
‘Perhaps we should wait until Valerie and Jeff are here; after all, it is their future we’re discussing,’ Lorcan suggested mildly.
‘I don’t think they should rush into marriage,’ Tessa said firmly and saw Carmel look at her in surprise.
‘I want her married before she has that baby,’ Terence declared trenchantly, sitting up straight, lower lip sticking out like an angry little gnome just as Jeff pushed Tessa’s hostess trolley, laden with mugs of tea and a plate of chocolate biscuits, into the room. Valerie followed him, head down, and it was clear she had been crying.
‘You should have used the china cups,’ Tessa chided testily as she handed her a steaming mug.
‘Ah sure, what difference does it make once it’s tea, isn’t that right, Valerie?’ Lorcan tried to lighten the atmosphere when he saw the girl flush at the rebuke as she handed him a mug of tea, and placed one on the coffee table for her mother.
‘Right, we’re all here now,’ Terence began impatiently. ‘I was just saying to your father,’ he looked up at Jeff, ‘I expect you to marry my daughter before this baby is born.’
‘Now look, Terence,’ Tessa stood up. She had had enough of the little dictator sitting on her sofa. ‘Rushing up the aisle is not necessarily the wisest course of action. They’re too young – they’re not even twenty-one – it would be—’
‘I’m telling you now, Tessa, your son is going to walk her up the aisle before that baby’s born. I’m having no bastards in my family, thank you,’ Terence said furiously.
‘There’s no need for that sort of language, if you don’t mind,’ Lorcan reproved sternly.
‘I think Tessa’s right.’ Carmel sat tombstone straight, her handbag on her knees, her hands curled so tight around the handle her knuckles were white. Two bright spots of pink stained her pale cheeks.
Terence’s eyes bulged, his Adam’s apple bobbed up and down and he looked as if he was about to have apoplexy. ‘Are you mad?’ he demanded, glaring at her in astonishment.
Valerie looked stricken at her mother’s startling intervention. Jeff shot a surprised glance at his mother.
‘No, I’m not mad, Terence. I agree with Tessa. They are far too young. There’s plenty of time for them to get married. They have their whole lives ahead of them to do that.’ Carmel didn’t look at her husband as she made her speech.
‘I agree wholeheartedly, Carmel,’ Tessa said, delighted to have an unexpected ally. ‘Getting married and having a child are major life-changing events. Jeff is doing his finals next year; he’s not going to be able to concentrate on his studies if he has all—’
‘I�
�m not interested in your son’s finals! They’re no concern of mine. I’m not having my daughter going around as an unmarried mother,’ Terence fumed.
‘With respect, Terence, Jeff’s exams and his results will have a most important bearing on their child, our grandchild,’ Tessa said sharply. ‘The better he does in his exams the easier it will be for him to secure a good job, and provide for Valerie and their child. Surely they can wait for another year or two until they’re on a steadier footing? Things have changed, it’s not the . . . the stigma it used to be,’ she added, glancing over at Valerie, who looked stunned. ‘I’m sure you agree with me, Valerie. I’m sure you wouldn’t like to see Jeff’s last two years of study wasted. I know he’s said he’ll work on the boat but I can tell you it’s hard work and long hours, and we haven’t worked all these years to provide Jeff with an education only for it to be thrown away. The best thing Jeff can do for you and the baby is get his qualification, and I know if you love him you won’t stand in his way.’
Valerie swallowed hard. Tessa’s hard stare was unnerving. Jeff was staying mute. She was disgusted and disappointed with him. She wanted him to jump in and say, ‘I’m going to marry her,’ but he was keeping out of the conversation and she knew then that his mother and Carmel had thrown him a lifeline and he was going to grab it.
‘Now wait here a minute,’ Terence exclaimed as he saw what was happening. ‘Have the men no say in this at all? You women aren’t thinking straight.’
‘Tessa, I can understand Terence’s concerns, and Jeff has expressed his willingness to marry Valerie before the baby is born.’ Lorcan eyed his wife keenly.
‘It’s up to Valerie. Let her decide,’ Tessa declared. ‘I know she loves Jeff, and I know she’ll make the right choice for all of them, and of course, Lorcan and I will give every help we can to them.’
Valerie knew she was trapped in a no-win situation. Tessa had skilfully manoeuvred her into a corner. If she said she wanted Jeff to marry her, he could say goodbye to his chosen profession and spend his life on the boats in a tough occupation that would mean they would have to live in Rockland’s. Tessa was right in one way. Even she could see that. Getting married now would be a short-term solution and would have a huge impact on their future options. There was nothing she could do about having the baby, but by choosing to wait to marry, she could take the pressure off Jeff and let him continue with his studies and marry him when, as Tessa had put it, they were on a ‘steadier footing’.
With All My Love Page 17