Terran squeezed her hand. Other than Lira, Eris knew of only Imryll, but she doubted Imryll had left her forest. There were other keepers, though. Were she to delve deep enough, she suspected she could find them.
Lira nodded slowly. “Perhaps you are right. The time for hiding is past.”
As Lira turned to go, Eris caught her arm. “What of Ferisa?”
Lira took a deep breath and shook her head. “Gone. And from what I can tell, so are several others, all priestesses of high rank. Those who remain will not speak against them, but I suspect they all were part of the sect.”
Terran stiffened. His jaw clenched slightly.
Eris only sighed. More things to worry about. Not only did she have to fear the magi returning, she had to learn what this sect of the church intended. Why had they tried to kill her? A nagging worry told her it had something to do with the Source as well.
Lira patted her hand. “Go. Be with your family as Jacen returns home. They will need your support.”
Eris turned away from Lira and made her way to the great doors of the throne room and pushed them open.
She should have felt anxious or relieved or something, but all she felt was a strange sense of calm.
Her family waited. Runners sent ahead of the soldiers had sent word. Eris wished she had been the one to share the news of Jacen’s death, but perhaps it was better this way.
She nearly stumbled when she saw her mother.
Her golden hair had returned, but it was streaked with hints of brown. Her bright blue eyes carried flecks of green, much like Terran’s now did. She sat atop her seat, smiling at Eris. Her father sat next to her, his hand reaching across the distance, their fingers entwined. He looked healthier than he had, more like his old self.
Her mother stood and hurried to her, throwing her arms around her. Terran stepped to the side, letting them have the moment together.
Had it only been days since she’d left? In that time, her mother had regained much of what she’d lost. Strength and vigor that hadn’t been there only a week before. She carried a regal air about her again, a queen once more. She should not have regained so much vigor so quickly…unless it was something of the healing Eris had done.
“Thank you,” she whispered. “You have become so much more than I ever hoped.”
Eris blinked back the sudden tears. Hearing her mother speak of pride about her meant more than she imagined. “I’m sorry I couldn’t save Jacen.”
Her mother held her, and tears fell from her eyes as well. “I fear Jacen has been lost since the magi first attacked him.”
“I could have saved him, too. Had I only known how.”
“You did what you could. I pray he found peace at the end.”
Eris thought about how Jacen had looked up toward the sky, the way tension had finally left his face and eyes at the end, and knew that he had.
“You knew what I could become,” Eris said.
Her mother pushed away and glanced back at her father. He smiled at her with a mixture of sadness and love. When she turned back to Eris, she nodded. “You are much like her, you know.”
“Like who?”
Her mother smiled again and ran a hand through Eris’s dark hair. “She would have been so proud of who you’ve become.”
“Mother?” Eris asked.
Her mother’s lips tightened, and she nodded, as if coming to a decision. “You weren’t the first keeper in the family, Eris.”
As she said it, Eris thought she knew what would come next.
She was wrong.
“Rochelle always was different. When she learned what she could do, she finally understood why. And then when she had you…she feared for your safety, especially after what the magi had done to Elaysia.”
Eris shook her head. “What are you saying?”
Her mother swallowed. “Eris—it’s time you know the truth. I did what I had to do to keep you safe. Hanrik doesn’t even know. He was away in the north, settling the battle with Varden when she came to me. She was so frightened…I had to do something.”
“What? What did you have to do?”
“Rochelle was a keeper like you.”
Like her. Maybe Eris wasn’t as different from the rest of her family as she’d always thought.
Her mother took a deep breath and sighed. “Not just a keeper. It is time you know everything.” She glanced toward where her father sat. “Eris—you have been a daughter to me. I love you as much as I love the others. But Rochelle is your mother.”
Eris gasped. “My what?”
Her mother nodded. “I—” Her mother couldn’t finish.
Eris looked away. Rochelle was a keeper…and her mother.
All the years she’d felt different—all the years she’d felt as if she didn’t fit into her family—but all that time she had been like her mother, only she hadn’t known. Had she never been different? Could Rochelle have taught her what it meant to be a keeper? But why had she left? Why would she abandon Eris here, uncertain whether she would ever learn to use her ability?
Eris swallowed. Did knowing change anything? Would it mean Jasi and Desia were no longer her sisters? Did it mean she shouldn’t grieve Jacen? Or feel angry that Ferisa had betrayed her?
Or should she not feel relieved her mother—at least the only woman she’d ever known as her mother—still lived?
Eris sighed.
If anything, she should feel relieved. Though she didn’t know what had happened with Rochelle, she still had a family. And now she no longer needed to fear that she was different, because she was different. But that difference had saved Errasn. She should feel proud.
Except…Eris didn’t know how to feel.
She looked at her mother. Tears streamed from her mother’s eyes. Eris put her arms around her and hugged her. Her mother stiffened at first, but then hugged her back. She sobbed softly onto Eris’s shoulder.
Eris would figure out how to feel later. For now, she would grieve with her family.
Keeper of Light
Chapter 63
Eris Taeresin sat quietly in her childhood room, eyes fixed on the arrangement of flowers left on a desk by one of the servants. Two roses, one pale yellow and one a muted purple, were set into a background of camogines. Cut grasses were interspersed, layered around the flowers, hiding a strange flower with dark maroon petals. The scent wafting from the arrangement was lovely. The message within was not.
A warning.
She was not as skilled at reading messages within flowers as Lira, the Mistress of Flowers, but she had learned enough during her time delving the roots of the Svanth Forest, using the lessons woven there by the first keeper, stored for keepers to come—keepers like Eris. The twin roses and the contrasting colors served as a warning. The rest guided her to know where she should look, but little else. The grasses were nothing more than a window dressing like the shopkeeps within the city used to draw customers in.
Eris traced her finger around the roses, drawing in a hint of the energy stored in the cuttings. As a keeper—both a keeper of flowers and of trees—she could use the power stored in the flowers. Now, she wanted not just to use the power but to understand it.
As she drew it in, she let her eyes close and let the flowers guide her. These were not of the palace garden. She had not expected them to be. Lira kept roses, but none quite so delicate. With the curl to the petals and the speckled pattern along the stems, these looked wild grown, with none of the help of the gardeners to let them reach their full potential. In spite of that, the roses had no signs of rot, and their fragrance was sweet. They came from a hillside far from the palace where wild roses clustered. A copse of trees provided some shelter, protecting them from wind. The air smelled familiar…
Eris released the energy from the roses. They might tell her more, but as cuttings, they were limited on how useful they could be. The camogines were different. She barely needed to draw in their energy to know they came from the palace. And the grasses? She consi
dered drawing on their energy, but they weren’t really even a part of the message.
Then there was the other flower. It looked much like a veratrum, but its color was wrong. Not the bold orange or blues of the veratrums she knew; this was different, with deep maroon nearly a blood red. She pulled it out and touched the petals, drawing the energy from them. Unlike the other flowers, she had no vision of its origin. Nothing but darkness came from it.
She looked up from the arrangement and glanced around the room. She’d been back within the palace only a day, and it didn’t quite feel like home. Now she felt more at home beneath the arching canopy of towering svanth trees, with the subtle aroma of decaying leaves mixed with the soft susurrus of insects and birds lulling her to sleep. Her bed felt too soft, but it was more than that. Here, in the palace, she didn’t have Terran lying next to her at night.
The wide closet holding all her dresses was open. The fancy embroidery and soft silks no longer suited her, not as they once had. Eris no longer minded that she’d changed. Simple greens and browns felt more appropriate and helped her blend into the forest. The splashes of color she added came from silks she tied into her hair.
Her door opened, and she looked up. Her mother stood before her. Wrinkles worked along the corners of her eyes, more than had been there months ago. Her golden hair had lost some of its luster, as if the effect of her prolonged illness still hadn’t receded. Streaks of silver now shot through her hair, though they blended with the gold, giving her an even more regal air.
Eris stood and tipped her head. “Mother.”
Her mother hesitated. One hand gripped her simple white dress while the other touched the silver necklace she wore. “You still call me that?”
Eris exhaled slowly and nodded. After learning that her aunt Rochelle was actually her mother, she had struggled with what the relationship meant, but what had really changed for her? “Whatever else has happened, you are still my mother.”
Her mother blinked back tears. “When you left the last time, I thought you might not return.”
Eris had stayed in Eliara to mourn, but after her brother Jacen’s funeral, she had to leave. Her work had not been complete when she last left the border with Saffra. Even now it wasn’t fully complete. Would it ever be finished? Already, the border had changed. With every tree she planted, what had once been open plains rolling into the Kernig Mountains now had become more like the Svanth Forest. The undergrowth was not as dense as it would be in time, and the trees were sparser than they were in the Svanth, but otherwise, they were much the same. What else had Eris changed by planting the forest? How much of the land would her actions alter?
She shook her head. Had she not acted, the desolation would have pressed into Errasn. As it was, the energy of the trees simply held back whatever dark magic the magi had worked. “I am a keeper. There are many things I must do.”
That her duties kept her from the palace served as an added benefit.
“The border?”
Eris nodded. “The Conclave magic is powerful. It will take a long time for me to clear the effects of what they have done there.”
“You don’t worry about the magi returning?”
How odd that her mother feared the magi more than the priestesses who were responsible for her illness in the first place. The same priestesses who were responsible for taking Ferisa from them. Returning her was another task Eris would see complete. “The magi have been pushed back into Saffra. They will not harm us anytime soon.”
Her mother’s eyes widened slightly. “Lira tells me you continue to master your ability. She says you have the potential to be a powerful keeper.”
Lira had said nothing to Eris about that, but Lira had ever been reserved about what she thought Eris could accomplish. And now, even Eris understood how little Lira could teach her. She could teach her about flowers, could guide her through what it meant to be a keeper of flowers—Eris had ability with flowers as well as trees—but she knew nothing of what it meant to be a keeper of the forest. And from what Eris could tell, none ever managed to bond both. Yet Eris had.
By bonding the teary star flower, she could work with both flowers and trees. She could summon and use the flows of energy working through both. Without that ability, she would have failed many times over.
When Eris didn’t speak, her mother hesitated. It said volumes. “Have you searched for her?”
Eris had no need for her mother to explain who she meant: Rochelle. “Would it matter if I did?”
Her mother closed her eyes and inhaled deeply. “Not to me. I have always known you would need to learn the truth. I only wish she had been the one to tell you.”
Eris sniffed and stood from her bed to pace across her room. “And why didn’t she? The last time I saw her, I was old enough to learn. Why wouldn’t she have told me then?”
Eris had been nearly eleven the last time she saw her Aunt Rochelle. She had come for a brief visit—so typical of her at the time—sweeping in and staying for a few weeks. As always, she had an energy about her, a drive, but she made a point of spending time with Eris. Always with Eris.
Only now did Eris understand why.
“There were things she had to do.”
“What kind of things?”
Her mother shook her head. “I was never privy to her secrets.”
“You were privy to one.”
Her mother cocked her head and nodded. “The only one. I think if she had anyone else she could confide in, she would have.”
“And Father? Why wouldn’t she have gone to him?”
Her mother shook her head slightly. “Hanrik never understood what drove Rochelle. She…she was much like you. She followed her own path, leaving the palace before she was even sixteen. By the time she returned, Hanrik had assumed the throne. Though he will never admit it, I think that has always been a divide between them.”
Since learning Rochelle was her mother, she wondered what it would have been like to have been raised by her. Would she have learned about her abilities sooner? She might have had the knowledge needed to prevent the magi from gaining enough strength to attack the border and press the desolation across the land. She might have managed to save Jacen.
Instead, Eris had fumbled along. Even Lira—the person her mother had brought to the palace to teach her what it meant to be a keeper—had been unwilling to adequately teach her.
But had Rochelle stayed in Eris’s life, how would things have been different? She would never have known her sisters. As much pain as Jasi, Desia, and Ferisa had caused her over the years by making her feel different, she still loved them. Jacen had been a brother to her. His death still hurt. And because she had been raised in the palace, she’d had the opportunity to meet Terran. She would not change any of those experiences.
“I tried finding her,” Eris admitted. “I thought that with my abilities I could reach through the roots of the trees and trace them to her, but I can’t. I’m not strong enough. Or not skilled enough. Either way, I haven’t found her.”
Her mother raised her arms as if to embrace her but lowered them. “You were strong enough to save me. You were skilled enough to save all of Errasn.”
“But not Jacen.”
His loss stayed with her the most. She had been there during the attack. She should have been able to help him—to protect him. Instead, he died protecting her.
“What would you say to her? If you found her, what would you say?”
“I don’t know. Maybe nothing. Maybe learn what she knows about being a keeper or find out why she couldn’t raise me. Or maybe thank her for realizing she couldn’t, that there was a better home for me.”
Her mother smiled. This time, she did raise her arms and wrapped them around Eris. Since her illness, something about her had changed. Eris suspected it had to do with the fact that she’d been near death for so long. Had Eris not discovered how to plant the svanth trees, her mother might not have survived. As it was, Eris very nearly lost her.
<
br /> She held Eris for a long moment, holding her tight with arms that still felt frail. Slowly, she released her and pushed away. Tears streamed down her face, and she blinked them away, wiping the remains with the back of her hand. “I am proud of you, Eris.”
“You said that.”
Her mother smiled. “I don’t think I’ve ever said it enough. Without you, we would have lost more than we have.”
“Losing Jacen and Ferisa was enough.”
“We have not lost Ferisa.”
“She is with the priestesses. She let them try to kill me. The Ferisa we thought we knew is gone.”
Her mother shook her head. “Not gone. Never gone. We have to help her remember her family.”
Eris touched her stomach where the knife had stabbed into her. No scar remained—the healing of the forest ensured she had no lasting marker of her betrayal—but the memory was there, still sharp and raw.
“Has Lira learned what the priestesses sought?” Eris asked.
“No more than before. At least, not that she’s told me. I think Lira keeps things from me now. She thinks me fragile, that if she shares too much, I will break.”
Eris’s gaze slipped past her mother to the arrangement that had been left in her room. She didn’t know who had left the warning. Possibly Lira, but there had been other messages in the palace before, and she hadn’t really learned who left those either. Was the warning to caution her on what to share with her mother? Could that be the meaning behind the golden camogines?
The last time there had been a message in the palace, she had gone after the answer on her own. Doing so had nearly killed her. Would Lira have answers for her now? Would she help now that Eris had proven to be a keeper of both trees and flowers?
“How are Jasi and Desia?”
Her mother’s face fell, as if she’d been waiting for Eris to ask about her sisters. “Jasi…she is lost. Hardened in some ways. Your father has encouraged her to accept another betrothal, but now that Jacen is gone, I think he reconsiders. Jasi is capable, and there has been a female heir before. Desia harbors much anger. Much of her time is spent away from the family.” She leaned toward Eris and lowered her voice. “I worry most for Desia. Losing Jacen was bad enough, but it’s what happened with Ferisa that really bothers her.”
The Lost Garden: The Complete Series Page 49