by Frankie Rose
I wanted to find, capture and claim Reza. Instead I ended up losing myself to her, and now we’re probably both about to die. Because of me.
“They’re not following,” Col shouts over the roar of the ships engines. “Oh, no, wait. Yes they are. Fuck!”
I curve my hands around Reza’s face, lifting her chin so that she’s looking up at me. She was angry before, tense and stressed. Now she’s just afraid. “It’s going to be all right.” I imprint the words into her, and for once she doesn’t resist me. She lets me in for the briefest of moments, and I see everything. The structure of her mind is so similar to mine—an intricate mandala of pathways and connections, boggling in their complexity. It’s beautiful. She is beautiful.
I see the pain she’s suffered, and the all joy she’s experienced, and it tears me apart. A lot of the time, I was the cause of her pain. Not all of the time, but more often than not. And her happiest moments? The moments when she felt most free and safe? Those were the moments where, briefly, she was able to forget that I even existed. I’ve done nothing but hurt her, and yet she’s here right now, clinging to me, hoping I can change and be something better for her.
Her eyes are bright, wide, but unafraid. “Can you take it from me?” she replies. “Can you take all of the energy from me and still leave me alive?”
I’ve thought about it. I’ve thought about the possibility of taking her power from her. Things changed, though. Everything changed. And besides, even if it is possible for me to syphon energy from Reza, I know with a certainty that I wouldn’t be able to take it all. There’d be nothing of her left. I shake my head, and a little of the light in her eyes fades. “If you take it all, will you be strong enough to stop them?” she persists.
“I don’t know. It doesn’t matter, though. I won’t do it.”
“Isn’t that why you chased me down? Your desire for more power? If I offer it freely, you’ll be unstoppable. You’ll be able to put an end to Regis and Stryker once and for all.”
I don’t want to fight this anymore. I’m so tired of maintaining the illusion that my heart doesn’t sing every time Reza walks into a room. It’s exhausting, and the lie no longer serves any real purpose. I have to do what Darius told me to. I have to let down my walls. I have no idea how, though. I start with some simple truths. “I chased you down, because I had to. I didn’t understand why, then, but I do now. It wasn’t because your energy was calling to me. It was because you were, Reza. I’m...fuck, I’m sorry for everything you’ve gone through. The lengths you’ve had to go to to protect yourself from me. It should never have been like that. I was meant to be your protector. You were meant to be mine. I know that.”
Her eyes grow round. Her flushed, swollen lips part, and I wait, ready to hear whatever it is she has to say. If she wants to send me away, I’ll do it. I’ll go.
“JASS! Get up here! They’re moving faster than us! How’s that even possible?” Col’s hoarse shout cuts through my thoughts, sweeping me away from Reza’s mind. I’m back in the Oraxis, bathed in the red light from the proximity alarm that’s wailing right above my head. Reza’s hands shake as she urges me up toward the cockpit.
“Go! Go, Jass. Help him!
One hundred and eighty-six thousand, two hundred and eighty-two miles per second: the speed of light. Once you engage a hyper drive and breach faster-than-light travel, you remain at a constant speed until you disengage the drive. There’s no way Col should be screaming that The Nexus is gaining on us in hyperspace; if we entered hyperspace before the Construct, the distance between us should remain the same until one or both of us drop back into normal space. But when I reach Col and he jabs his finger as his array, I see he’s telling me the truth.
No…fucking…way…
The Construct have somehow developed a technology far beyond that of a hyperdrive. The Nexus is a colossal vessel, and right now it’s hauling ass. “How long until we reach our target?” I yell.
“Four minutes, thirty-seven seconds!”
“Can you open the cargo bay doors with the drives engaged?”
Col looks at me like I’ve lost my mind. “Hell no! The atmosphere will be ripped right out of the ship. None of the seals will hold under such a drastic pressure change. And at these speeds, the ship will break apart. ”
I grind my teeth together until it feels like they’re about to crack. “Never mind. When I give you the command, just open them. I’ll keep us alive.”
“What do you mea—hey! Jass! Where the hells are you going?”
I leave Col behind, wrestling to keep the Oraxis level and in the game, and I hurdle over the benches in the passenger area, hurrying to the back of the ship. Reza’s right behind me. I can feel her worry through the connection, trying to hold me back. “What are you doing?” she calls. “How can I help?”
I point to the tower of crates stacked in the cargo hold—the same crates I was sitting on just now. “Open them up. Take the lids of five of them at least.”
Reza does what I’ve asked. She falters when she rips the lid off the first crate and she sees what’s inside: glowing blue plasma shells, designed for the sole purpose of refilling phase-rifles. At least a hundred of them. Very safe when in their sealed cartridges, but when exposed to immense heat and pressure…
Realization dawns on Reza’s face, and her skin pales. “Are you sure this is a good idea?”
“Absolutely not.” I open up the red box on the wall and rifle through its contents until I find what I’m looking for: a med scanner. The smallest electrical charge. That’s all I need. The med scanner will be able to provide the spark, and the plasma shells will do the rest. “Strap yourself in, Reza.” I command Col to fasten his harness, too. Reza sits herself down on an engineer’s bench, tightening the harness around her slender frame. Her pulse is racing all over the place. I can feel it through the tether, urging my own pulse to speed ahead, out of control. I calm both her heart rate and mine, enough that she doesn’t look like her head’s about to explode anymore.
“How long until we drop out of hyperspace now?” I call through the comms unit on the wall next to me.
“Two minutes, ten seconds,” Col replies. “And about fifteen seconds until The Nexus is right on top of us. I can see the damn thing through the view port, Jass!”
“Everything’s going to be fine. When I tell you, open the cargo hold doors. I’ll send the crates and the med scanner out into the path of The Nexus. Once they’re clear of us, I’ll trigger the scanner. Hopefully the blast will be closer to The Nexus than it is to us.”
“That’s your big plan? No fucking way!”
Across from me, Reza looks terrified. “There has to be another way. If we just—” She stops herself. “Gods. You’re right. We just have to risk it, Col. We’re out of time.”
“Take a deep breath,” I yell. “Once the doors are open, the oxygen inside the ship will evacuate. Don’t try and hold the breath. If you do, your lungs will explode. Just let it out slowly, a little at a time. One continuous stream. You understand?”
Col swears at the top of his lungs. Reza simply nods. She’s afraid now. Hell, I’m a little fucking worried. I place the med scanner in one of the crates, amongst the glowing plasma cartridges, and then I strap myself in opposite Reza.
“How long can a human survive in space without a suit?” she asks.
“Ninety seconds. But don’t worry. We only need to make it thirty.” I hit the comms panel on the wall and give the order. “Open the door, Col. Do it now!” Reza sucks in a breath. I nearly burst my own lungs with the amount of oxygen I force into them.
The nine foot high cargo door is there.
I blink.
The nine foot high cargo door is gone.
Then…
Silence.
I’m ready for the massive, instant pressure that hits the ship. I close my mind around the outer hull, locking it tightly in place. Not an easy task. I can make sure we don’t explode into a million pieces for a short amount o
f time, but we’re going to have to be quick about this.
The straining of the Oraxis’ hyper drive disappears. The thrumming and rushing of my own blood churning around my body. The sound of the anti-rad panels being ripped from the interior of the ship and whipping away, out into space. I can’t hear any of it. The crates containing the plasma cartridges are picked up and sucked out of the yawning maw that now exists at the rear of the Oraxis, and then they’re gone, too. Behind us, the crates and debris from inside the ship have been pushed away from us by the pressure of the atmosphere leaving the Oraxis, but they’re still traveling through hyper space at a constant speed.
A blur of blue and white light stands between us and the crates. And beyond the crates: The Nexus. Looming, black, industrial metal. Giant turrets, bristling with phase canons. The Nexus is not a pretty machine; it was designed as a stronghold, and that is exactly what it is. The vacuum pulls at my arms and legs, trying to tease me out of my harness, to suck me out into oblivion. I’m freezing cold, an agonizing pain shooting through my body as I slowly allow the air inside my lungs to release. Across the other side of the cargo hold, Reza is clinging onto the bottom of the bench she’s sitting on with her eyes screwed tightly shut. Her lips are pursed, though; she’s obviously following my instructions. If she weren’t, she’d already be dead.
The Nexus draws even closer. Close enough that I can see the phase canons mounted on the underside of the monstrosity swiveling, taking aim, preparing for when we drop out of hyperspace.
Now’s the time.
I have to act.
I extend my right arm, hand outstretched, focusing on the crates. The med scanner is in there; I reach out with my mind, searching for its location, and I lock onto it. All I have to do is short out the electronics inside it now. The relays inside it will blow, causing a fire, and then…
Out of the corner of my eye, something snags at my attention. The sole of Reza’s boot. Whipping my head around, I nearly screw up and blow out the contents of my lungs.
“Reza!”
She’s no longer strapped into her harness. She’s grasping hold of the bench, her hands white with the effort, her body stretching out toward the open cargo door. She’s going to be pulled out of the damn ship.
“Jass!” Her voice is frantic inside my head. “The harness snapped. I can’t hold on!”
“Do not let go!” How did this happen? I watched her fastening herself in only moments ago. The harness was done up properly. I could see that myself. I thrust out my other hand, grappling hold of Reza with my mind. I feel her relief when she senses that I’ve got her; it travels down the link in surges that threaten to flood my head completely.
“Thank you. Gods, I thought I was dead for sure. I—”
It happens very quickly. I have hold of her in my mind one second, and then she’s being ripped away from me. I don’t even see the container tearing free from the wall and hurtling toward her. I jump as the large metal lock box crashes into Reza’s body, sending her flying from my grasp.
Out into hyperspace.
TWENTY-NINE
REZA
MERCY
I’m falling, and I’m not. My body is being pulled in a thousand directions at once. My need to open my mouth and scream is all consuming, but I don’t. Maybe it’s the sheer surprise of being torn out of the Oraxis, but I manage to keep myself from expelling the remainder of my oxygen as I hurtle out of the open cargo doors. I’m able to scream inside my head, though.
“JAAAASSSS!”
I am going to die. I am going to die, and the very last thing I see, burned into the very foundations of my soul, is the look of horror on Jass’ face. He’s on his feet and moving before I can blink. His hand is reaching out to me, his fingers splayed, his eyes shining brightly with determination.
His boots are planted firmly on the deck of the Oraxis’ cargo bay; the ship is pumping out O2 in an attempt to replace the missing atmosphere, but the roaring wind spewing out into space doesn’t affect him. His clothes flap and snap around him and his hair swirls and dances around his face, but his body remains locked in place, unmoving and strong.
I hit one of the crates, the corner of the plasticast box striking me square in the back, and still I don’t scream. The impact itself doesn’t hurt. Every cell of my body is threatening to break apart, so the pain isn’t localized. It’s everywhere, radiating through me like an agonizing inferno.
One second?
Five?
Ten?
How long has it been? How long can I survive like this? Everything has slowed. My eyes are bleeding. Crimson tears that cloud my vision. The silence that fills my head is deafening. I never knew anything could be so quiet. Sound doesn’t exist in space. I’ve never fully comprehended it, though. How strange it is that so much life and creation, and how many violent ends can occur without making so much as an audible sigh out here in the cold, cosmic forever.
My head feels like it’s falling apart.
Gods…
Gods, I’m going to pass out.
It’ll be a mercy. I won’t be conscious when the end comes for me. I’ll drift into nothingness before my body freezes or my organs burst, and I won’t feel a damned thing.
Closing my eyes is hard. I don’t want to block out my sight. I can still see Jass standing on the grated steel in the cargo bay, terrible and magnificent. I will never see him again if I lower my eyelids. I don’t want this to be the end.
Not…
for…
me…
Not…
for…
us…
A firm, solid grasp forms around my body, closing in tight. So tight, I think I’m being crushed. This is it, then. Not much time left.
“Hold on. I’ve got you.” Jass’ voice is loud and clear in my head, the only solid and constant thing amongst my final, fractured thoughts. “I’m not done with you yet,” he tells me.
I can’t hold my breath anymore. Against all odds, I’m being pulled back toward the Oraxis. I don’t think I’m going to make it, though. I don’t think I can. My lungs are screaming for oxygen. I need to take a breath.
Closer…
Closer…
I’m almost at the mouth of the cargo hold when I notice how badly Jass is shaking. His whole body is trembling as he reels me in. His brow is creased with deep lines. His lips are drawn back into a pained grimace, his teeth bared. This is so hard for him. He’s fighting harder than I’ve ever seen him fight before. He makes using his abilities look so easy, so this is obviously costing him dearly.
He’s trying to save me. He’s still keeping the ship from splintering apart in hyperspace. He’s presumably holding the crates in place, and he’s also holding himself in place, too, rooting himself to the deck. He’s split himself into four, and it looks like it’s killing him.
His grip on me loosens, and Jass slides forward, his boots skidding across the grating, three feet closer to the open cargo doors. He’s spreading himself too thin. He’s not going to be able save himself, and me, and damage The Nexus.
“Blow the crates,” I tell him. “End this now.”
“I’m not blowing anything until you’re back on this ship.”
“Do the right thing, Jass. It’s time. Just take my energy. You’ll be strong enough to face the Construct on your own.”
He shakes his head. Not even a moment’s consideration. A month ago, I wouldn’t have even needed to say the words. He would have let me die and taken the power without hesitation.
“Take it now,” I tell him. “Take it from me.” I lower the shields that have protected me from him. I let them fall…
…and it’s the last thing I do.
THIRTY
JASS
COUNTERWEIGHT
Reza’s mind shuts down and opens itself to me all at once. Her eyes remain open, but I can tell she’s fallen unconscious. The energy inside me acts of its own accord, reaching out for the energy that exists within her, and the two threads
of power twine together, twisting into one unbreakable rope, feeding back into me. The sensation is heady and unbearable, a wave of so much energy that it threatens to overcome me. I grind my teeth together, wrestling to harness it, but it doesn’t want to be harnessed. It wants to whip free of me, discharging of its own accord outward into the universe. I must contain it, though. I have to leash it if I’m going to save her.
It takes everything I have and more. It snakes its way into me and through me, lashing against my mind, fighting me, but I do it. I tighten my grip around its slippery wraithlike form, and I command it to obey.
Reza’s body flies back toward the Oraxis, crashing through the cargo doors. As soon as she clears the open secondary airlock, I access the ship’s systems, and the heavy steel doors slam closed. An alarm sounds, and the airlock doors come down, the sound booming through the craft.
The Oraxis’ life support systems kick in immediately, flooding the ship with atmosphere, and the gravity generators spur into action. Reza’s body drops to the deck like a stone. My need to rush to her, to funnel this life-giving energy back into her body, is so strong, but there’s something I have to do first.
Sucking in a ragged breath, my head tilts and spins from the rush of oxygen flooding my starving body.
“Cutting it a little close!” Col hollers from the cockpit. “I thought you were both dead.”
Coughing, I run to the airlock doors and look out of the view port. The Nexus is practically on top of us. I can sense Regis’ wrath, so near now that I can almost touch it. The crates containing the plasma cartridges are nowhere to be seen. Either the monstrous ship behind us has already moved past them, or they are right under the belly of the beast. “Get ready to cut the hyperdrive!” I shout.
I hope Col’s heard me. If he hasn’t and we’re still here when the crates explode, we’ll share the same fate as The Nexus. There’s no time to make sure Col knows what to do, though. There’s no more time at all.