“Give me my keys Royce,” the first words she had spoken to him and he handed her keys to her. He opened the trunk and the kids and Joy filed out. “Lindsey stay with Justin, Deon get your things we’re going home.” “What? No Joy, no!” She was heading in the house and Royce stopped unloading the chairs and went after her. “No Joy, don’t let her do this to us, don’t,” he followed her into the house. “I’m going home Royce!”
The children went into the house, Deon stopped not knowing what to do, “Get your things Deon, I’ll get Lindsey’s we’re going.” “Joy, Joy, wait, just wait a moment,” he grabbed her by the arm and pulled her to him, “Don’t let her win, don’t let her win,” she pulled away. “Royce I just need to go okay, just let me go.” She was in the guest room now gathering up her things. Royce closed the door, “Joy, please stop, just stop and listen,” he pulled her to him again. She was so mad he could see the anger flashing in her. “I can’t do this Royce, I can’t deal with this okay,” she said looking at him and pulling away, “I don’t want to see you anymore, this is not for me!”
“What! No, how can you say that, don’t say that, don’t say that,” he went to her again. “Stop it Royce, stop! I need some space! Just give me some space okay!” He dropped his hands and let her go. He sat on the bed and she threw her things in her bag and left. He heard her in Justin’s room and then he heard the side door close and her car pull off, and he sat there on the bed. Joy didn’t want to see him anymore, she needed some space away from him, he sat there his heart broken and the perfect day shattered.
He sat there for a long time, his face in his hands, wiping a few tears that escaped. When he came out Dillon and Karen were sitting in the family room, just sitting there. He walked past them and into his room and sat on his bed and picked up the phone, he had it to his ear about to dial Joy’s number. He wanted to fix this and then he put it down, she didn’t want to see him anymore. He couldn’t believe the turn of events of this day and he didn’t know what to do so he put on his workout clothes. He needed some release or he thought he might explode.
He was so angry at Tammy and Amanda, it was their bullshit that caused all this! Joy he was so proud of her, she stood up to all of them, “We didn’t wear a condom, okay. We didn’t wear a condom, is that what you wanted to hear!” He was so proud of her but now she didn’t want to see him, Tammy had won, Tammy had won! Tammy had been trying to break him since he brought Justin over to the house and now she’d finally done it, he was broken.
Karen and Dillon were in their rooms when he walked out. He went upstairs to the workout room and closed the door. He laid on the sit up bench, his head lower than his feet, he braced his legs in the bars that held him in place, “One, two, three….” He began and then he was going at a fiendish pace, “45, 46, 46, 47, 48, 48, 48...Ahh fuck!” “One, two, three…” He started over, he couldn’t believe Joy broke up with him and didn’t want to see him again, “She broke up with me,” he said out loud, “55, 56, ….,” “What the fuck number am I on, fuck!” “One, two, three…” He couldn’t think, he was sweating now, he laid there breathing hard, catching his breath, he wiped wet sweat from his face and he knew a tear or two was in there. “We had it, we had it! We were free, free of Michael, free of Tammy…the bitch!” “Fuck! One, two, three…” “Arrggggg!” He let out a sob, “One, two, three…,” “That fucking bitch Tammy!”
Karen was distraught and blamed herself, she’d invited Ms. Joy. She never thought about what her mother would do, it just didn’t cross her mind that her mother would do that to another person, sure she would tear into her dad, he was her husband, but another person! She couldn’t imagine what her teammates were thinking and she couldn’t concentrate on the game at all after she saw her mother angrily stride over to her dad and Ms. Joy. She couldn’t hear everything, but she heard loud shouting, she saw her coaches and teammates looking over there too, she was mortified.
Her father was hurt, Ms. Joy had left him, she was so mad she left him and her father seemed lost. He’d sat in the guestroom a long time, now he was up in the workout room. She and Dillon were beyond worried about him, and it was her fault, why can’t her mother just leave him alone! She gets mad about everything he does and he doesn’t mean anything by it, but she just won’t…just won’t leave him alone! Her father had been in there a long time and she was scared for him so she walked up to the door a couple of times and she heard him still working out, talking to himself, a few curse words sometimes and she thought she heard him crying, poor daddy, I’m so sorry and she wiped tears from her eyes.
She went downstairs and picked up the cordless phone and took it up to her room and dialed her mother, “Mooomm! How could you? How could you?” “I was so mad honey, I didn’t mean to…,” “But you did and you hurt daddy. You hurt daddy and he didn’t even do anything…,” “He brought her and you know I can’t stand the sight of her…, “He didn’t mom, I did!” Karen burst into tears, “I did, I asked her to come!” She wailed. “Why would you do that Karen? Why would you do that?” “I didn’t know you would do that! I didn’t know you would hurt daddy like that! I don’t think he’s okay mom, Ms. Joy left him and he’s upset and crying,” she said worried about her father. “Well serves him right, maybe now he can feel what I’m feeling…” “Mom stop that…no wonder daddy hates you!” She thought her mother wouldn’t act like that anymore, especially after she wrote her dad the letter.
She’d told her to write it, she’d said, “Apologize for calling him and doing that to him,” she’d told her mother and Tammy balked at first and then she said, “He won’t like you if you don’t,” and her mother wrote the letter. She thought she wanted her father to love her again and wouldn’t behave like that anymore. “Karen honey you shouldn’t say things like that,” and she could tell she’d hurt her mother. She went on, “He does hate you, because you act so stupid that’s why he hates you. He hates you!” And she heard her mother cry, good she thought, now she knew how it felt when somebody did something to you that you didn’t like. “Good bye mother,” she said and hung up.
Royce came out after a long while. He’d tried to work out his demons and he came out drenched and soaking wet. He knocked on Karen’s door, “You want something to eat?” “Yes daddy,” she was famished, she’d been hungry since they came home, “Okay, I’ll order pizza.” She knew her father was upset now, since Ms. Joy had taught them to make their own pizzas they never ordered pizza. Now she left balls of dough in the freezer and when they wanted pizza they just took it out and let it thaw and they loved working the dough. Her father closed her door and she could see the sad hurt in his eyes, it was my fault, but I got mom back, I got her back, she thought, and about forty minutes later her father was calling her and Dillon down for dinner.
They sat there and her father could barely eat, he was eating so slowly, he’d sit and think, then he’d take a bite, he’d chew slowly, thinking as he chewed. To Royce the pizza tasted like cardboard, and the act of chewing was a chore, he had no appetite really, he was eating because he thought he should spend some time with the children, but his mind wasn’t on them or the awful pizza. It was on Joy and that she’d left him, just like that she’d broken up with him. It was so unexpected that his heart hadn’t recovered from her words yet.
Later when the Karen and Dillon were upstairs he went to bed, he’d tried to keep busy, and occupied and he’d picked up the phone a thousand times to call Joy and each time he put the phone down, “I can’t do this anymore! I need space, give me some space!” Her words rang in his mind and he put the phone down and now he lay in bed tossing and turning. Joy didn’t want to see him, his crazy ex-wife drove her away and he knew if he could help it he would never speak to Tammy again, that apology letter she’d written didn’t mean shit! This was it for her and if he did speak to her someone might have to drag him off her ass, or he would strangle the life out of her! The room was dark and he was thinking of Joy and unable to sleep and finally he got up and we
nt into the family room and lay on the sofa the TV on. The bed reminded him too much of Joy, her lying there in his arms, her smiling up at him as he took pleasure in their lovemaking, him and her laughing at something that was funny. Joy was gone.
Karen heard the TV, it had been on for a while. She went down to see what her dad was watching. He was asleep on the couch, I’m sorry daddy, he looked so peaceful, but she’d seen the torment he was in today. She went to his linen closet and found a blanket and came back and covered him and took the remote that was lax in his hand and turned off the TV. Next she clicked off all the lights and went to her room and went to bed. She could sleep now, her father was okay.
Through sheer exhaustion Royce had fallen asleep, he slept long and woke up late in the morning when he got up from the sofa the house was quiet, how’d I get on the sofa?” He was disoriented for a moment and hadn’t slept on the sofa in a long time. He used to do that when he was here by himself; when he would start watching a show and the next thing he knew he was asleep. Let me call Joy, see what she’d up to today, he thought to himself and he walked to the kitchen and picked up the phone and he was dialing when it hit him, she doesn’t want to see you right now she needs her space because of that crazy bitch Tammy, and he hung up the phone. His stomach growled and reminded him of another need. He took out eggs and bacon and fixed scrambled eggs, bacon and toast, even fixing breakfast made him think of Joy, she’d shown him how do this too, what would he do without her? Then he went upstairs to check on the kids, Dillon was up playing video games, “Breakfast is ready,” he went to Karen’s room and knocked and didn’t get an answer. He opened her door and found her sound asleep wrapped in her covers, he left her there and went downstairs and ate with Dillon.
“I’m sorry you had to see that yesterday Dillon, it wasn’t the best we adults had to offer.” This was serious, what Tammy had done was serious. She’d embarrassed them as a family and ruined his relationship with Joy. Dillon looked at him with a blank expression, “I hate you had to see something like that, but there’s nothing I can do about it, it happened. What your mother did was reprehensible and will affect us all,” me most of all, I lost Joy. “You want to talk about it, tell me how you’re feeling?” Royce asked not expecting anything, and Dillon looked at him and said,
“It was supposed to be fun yesterday dad. I was glad Ms. Joy, Deon and Lindsey could come to a game. They wanted too, they were excited to see Karen play…Why do bad things keep happening to this family?” He asked outright looking squarely and angrily at Royce. And Royce didn’t know what to say or how to answer, “I don’t know son, I don’t know.” “Well I’m sick of it,” Dillon said and stabbed into his eggs. “Me too, I’m sick of it too,” and they ate the rest of the meal in silence.
And he tried to be there for the kids. He had to get out of the house or he was going to explode. He was a ball of knots so he took them to the batting cages, “Just hit the balls Karen,” he encouraged when she missed ball after ball flying at her. They all took turns banging baseballs and for Royce he was trying to kill one with every swing, he swung hard and with all his strength. When he took them home he gripped the steering wheel when he pulled into Tammy’s driveway and he had to fight the urge not to go in there and start another big fight. This time it would have been a knock down drag out I’m kicking the shit out of you wipe the floor with you fight. He was going to take no prisoners on this one. Tammy had crossed his threshold for tolerance, she’d crossed his threshold for patience and he was out of both for her. He knew what stopped him, Tammy just wasn’t worth it. Other than having to acknowledge her at Karen’s or Dillon’s games he didn’t expend any of his energy towards her, never thought of her. She was just an annoying pest he had to put up with and until yesterday these antics of hers were getting tired and old. He saw her looking out the window, he gripped the wheel, “I’ll see you next time.” From his rearview mirror he saw the door opening and Tammy coming out and he was gone.
He went home to a quiet house and picked up the phone a thousand times to call Joy and thought better of it until finally he went in the workout room and worked out like a demon was on his back. His body was sore. He’d used muscles at the batting cages he hadn’t used in a long time apparently, and he welcomed the pain, at least it made him feel something. When he could barely move he went to the shower and stood under warm water first, soothing his muscles, then he turned the water cool, cool, cold to stop any inflammation, then he went back to warm, warm, warmer and he felt refreshed. He went to his room and shaved as close as possible and then he looked at the time, eleven thirty. He went to his closet and put on his clothes and got in his car and drove to Joy’s. He pushed the garage door opener and watched the door go up and parked his car in his spot, and pushed the button to let the door down. He walked through the door that led from the garage to the house, she never locks this door. He walked down the hall and gently opened the door, “It’s me Joy,” he said softly. He undressed down to his underwear and climbed in behind her and wrapped his body around hers.
Joy was lying in bed and heard the garage door going up, Royce! Her heart raced, she’d been lying there hoping he would come. She’d lain awake all last night hoping he would come. She thought he’d come to the front door like last time and had forgotten about the garage door opener she’d given him. She heard the door from the garage open and she smiled, he knew she never locked that door. She waited. She heard his footsteps down the hall, her door opened, and her heart burst with love.
Joy felt Royce’s arms around her, “Baby, I missed you baby,” he whispered and she felt his beautiful soft lips kissing her shoulder.
“Oh baby I missed you too.”
“I love you Joy, I love you so much.”
“I love you too baby, I love you so much baby, I love you, I love you, I love you,” she turned so he could have her lips. He hungrily went for her mouth and she hungrily went for his.
“Don’t do that again baby, I can’t live without you,” he said through his hungry kiss.
“I know baby I was miserable, I couldn’t sleep, I couldn’t eat, it was horrible without you,” he laughed. “Oh baby so was I, why didn’t you call me?” She held on to him, “I don’t know baby, pride I guess.” “Don’t do that again okay, don’t do that to us again,” he said, “I won’t baby, I can’t live without you.” He pulled her in his arms, “Oh Joy, Joy,” he kissed her lips and pulled at her gown. She reached for him wanting to feel his warm skin, to touch him, to feel him whole and real against her. She slid his underwear down pass his hips wanting them off. With her gown off, he felt her silky smooth skin, he moaned and wanted to feel her, to connect with her. Joy ran her hands up and down his body, feeling his strong muscles, “Oh baby you feel so good,” she said.
Royce’s lips were all over her, tasting her, loving her, feeling her, “Oh baby I need you, Oh baby I need you, come to me baby,” and Joy spread her legs and pushed up against him and felt him so hard and wanting. “Take me baby, take me, I’m yours, take me.” Royce moaned and hungrily and passionately they made love, frantic to be connected again, tying their love back together, fixing the bent, battered and broken pieces.
They cried out as another connection was made, and moaned as the pieces of their soul fit back together, and by the time they cried out and came together in one last surrender, his eruption hot and hard, and hers warm, yet hot and filled with love they were united again in mind, body and spirit. Afterwards they basked in the glow of their love. Joy could feel Royce’s smile his cheek against hers, and Royce could feel hers, his lips close to hers. “I love you Royce, I’m sorry. I love you so much baby, I didn’t mean to hurt you, or us. Please forgive me.” He kissed her lips, “I know baby, I’m glad it’s over.”
Now he knew the devastation and pain of losing her and he never wanted to feel that again, “Let’s get married,” he said.
CHAPTER 11 , LET'S GET MARRIED
Royce was free! Free to love Joy! Joy was free to love
him. It had been a couple of weeks since he’d asked Joy to marry him and he couldn’t have been happier, but the aftermath of the big fight at the soccer game had made a difference in a few lives. Collin and Amanda’s relationship was strained, they were together but barely. She looked like she was crying all the time and Bobby told him, “It looks like Amanda was having an affair with Michael,” and he had to act shocked, “Really, how’d you find out?” “Collin told us…he’s hurt man, hurt bad.” “I understand that,” and he could sympathize with that but Amanda was a bitch. “I don’t know what’s going to happen, they might split over this,” Bobby said, and to his surprise he thought, serves her right.
And the next week at the soccer game even as distressed and distraught as Amanda looked Royce couldn’t help himself he called to her from where he stood, “It’s about loyalty Amanda! I thought you understood the definition of the word!” Amanda ignored him and Collin looked stricken and he pat him on the back, “Sorry Collin man, I just had to say something to her after the riding she gave me.”
And the other person who seemed to have changed was Tammy. As soon as he walked up to the sideline she came up to him, “Please Royce can I talk to you for a minute?” And if Dillon hadn’t been watching he would have said, “Hell no! Get out of my face!” But he nodded and followed her away from the group, “I’m sorry Royce I didn’t mean to act that way,” she said looking totally contrite. “I’m glad to hear that Tammy but know this if it wasn’t for Karen and Dillon I wouldn’t have anything to do with you period!” He said looking angrily at her, “But for them I have to but that by no means gives you the right to think you have any say in my life,” he was still angry, “You’re not the woman I thought you were!”
Royce Page 29