“Where did you spend the night?” He locked his jaw and stared over her head at the far wall. Her hair was in his periphery. The gorgeous sunset strands tempted his fingers. He didn’t know what he was going to do if he didn’t like her answer. He wasn’t a pussy. Begging wasn’t his style. However, he also wasn’t the type to withstand defeat. If she’d jumped some other guy last night, he’d walk out the door, and he wasn’t sure he’d come back. Music clip or not.
“Does it matter?” she whispered.
She leaned forward and he held her in place, not letting her go, not even sure if his fingers were digging into her.
“It matters to me. You know it does.”
In a flash of fiery hair she spun to face him. “I don’t know shit, Sean.” Her frown was menacing. “Actually, I do know something. I now know the reason you needed a distraction. I now know I was—” She clamped her lips together and squeezed her eyes shut with a wince. “Forget it.” She grabbed his wrists and slowly added pressure until he released his grip. “Do you want to get started or not?”
“No.” His voice was fiercer than necessary. It worked a fucking charm. Red opened her eyes and gave a heavy swallow. “I have something to say. Except, I’m going to keep my trap shut if you were with another guy last night.”
“Do you really think one-night stands are fun for me?” She jutted her chin. “That I go out and take pleasure in explaining my sexual hang ups to random men for thirty seconds of mild satisfaction?”
“Fuck.” He rubbed a hand over his eyes, hating the vision of another man driving into her. “So does that mean you didn’t sleep with anyone else?”
Her shoulders sagged with an exhale. “Look, Sean. We need to be able to work together. We can either continue this awkward conversation, or forget last night ever happened.”
The heat in his veins turned volcanic. His palms began to sweat. “Melody, please.” He didn’t want to lose her, and the slow burn of destruction was tearing him to shreds. “Just tell me where you spent the night.”
He could see it—her naked body, her splayed hair. He could hear it, too. All the breathy moans and fucked-up pleasure. His blood boiled, preparing to kill whoever she shared herself with.
She planted her hands on her hips and stared at him. Glared, actually. And as the seconds ticked by, the tension in her features dissipated. She began seeing into him, touching his heart with the glimpse of fragility. “No, Sean. I crashed at my sister’s.”
She diverted her gaze, focusing on her feet as her heel bobbed up and down, jolting her leg. “And when I told her what happened, it made me realize I had no right to act the way I did.” Her voice lowered to a dull whisper. “You and Sidney are none of my business. I had no right to react that way. This thing between us was only meant to be casual fun. I knew that. We both did. I’m the one that made the mistake. Maybe if I’d asked why I was a distraction, I’d have earned the right to be mad, but in honesty, I’d like to think you would’ve told me the truth. I should be the one apologizing.”
“I agree.” Her head snapped up, and he had the pleasure of watching her barely contained annoyance. “We did say this was all for fun, and I’d like to think I would’ve told you the truth as well. But I lied when I said I was only after something casual. I’m not after a fun time. I never have been, and I should’ve told you sooner. I just needed to get my head straight about Sidney first.”
Red cringed.
He had to refrain from doing the same. “Want me to explain so you’ve got all the gory details?”
“Is it really necessary?”
He shrugged. “I want you to be comfortable with me. And her.”
She didn’t respond. Her wince remained in place. There was no choice. He was going to tell her everything and hope she understood where his infatuation had come from.
“I was going through a pretty fucked-up time. I wasn’t happy with my position in the band. I’m still not. And then Sidney came back into our lives.” His throat tightened at the memory. At his stupidity. “A lifetime ago we did something idiotic, and the sex tape has haunted us ever since—”
She turned and walked toward the stereo system. “I don’t need to hear this.”
“Yeah, you do.” He raised his voice over the music. “Because I plan to take this thing between us further.”
Her footsteps faltered. Stopped. And that arrogant chin of hers rose.
“I hadn’t seen Sidney in a long time. I hadn’t even thought much of her until I found out she was at Mason’s property, working on our next album.” He remembered the phone call from Leah and the immediate increase of his heartrate, both in concern for her, and in hope. He’d had nothing—a career he didn’t get credit for, no love life, a sterile sex life, and friends who were becoming the fucking Brady Bunch of marriage. It was like a switch had been flicked. He wanted what they had, and Sidney was the perfect candidate to help him achieve it.
“I fell for her for the wrong reasons. I didn’t want to be the weak link in the band. I didn’t like being looked down on. I guess I hoped Sidney would keep my mind away from my failures, and I became obsessed with trying to obtain the respite I needed from her.”
“Sounds a lot like a distraction to me,” she drawled. “Wasn’t I the same thing?”
He deserved that. “Honestly? At the start, you were. But things quickly changed.”
She turned, her eyes now filled with a hope that made his chest restrict in the best fucking way. “How?”
“There’s no obsession with you—”
“Oh, you flatterer.” She rolled her eyes.
“Because when I was with Sidney, I was constantly trying to forget my failures. When I was around her, I still struggled to hide the thoughts that taunted me. And with you, they don’t even exist. When we’re together, the world doesn’t mean shit. I don’t care about my career, or what I want in life. All I can think about is you.”
The self-castration wasn’t so bad when he received a dumbfounded look in return. Melody was in shock, her lips slightly parted, her eyes blinking in a daze.
“You made me realize my infatuation was for what Sidney stood for, not what she actually meant to me. Yes, she’s beautiful and will always be a close friend—”
“I’m not entirely sure where you’re going with this. Maybe you should quit while you’re ahead.”
He chuckled and bridged the distance between them, hovering over her. “And maybe you should give me time to explain before I place you in a position where you’ll have no choice but to listen.”
“Fine.” She shrugged a shoulder. “Apparently, watching you dig yourself from one hole to the next is my new pastime.” Her chest rose and fell in rapid succession. Even more tempting, her tongue slipped out to moisten her bottom lip.
“No, Melody,” he drawled her name with slow deliberation. “Your new pastime is me. End of story.”
The corners of her eyes crinkled with the smile spreading her lips. She was gorgeous. So damn gorgeous it hurt deep down in his chest. “Do you forgive me for flying off the handle?”
“Sweetheart, you didn’t do anything wrong.”
“It doesn’t feel that way.” She rested her hand on his sternum and played with the V-neck of his black cotton shirt. “I’ve never been jealous before.”
He frowned. “Never?”
She scrunched her face, shook her head. “I guess I’ve always been…”
“What?” He was dying to know what set him apart from all the other men she’d been with. Despite her fondness for hiding behind sexual excuses, he knew she was a confident woman. Or once had been.
“I’ve never relied on anyone else for my happiness.” She raised her gaze, pinning him through the heart with the sadness in her eyes. “I know you said you want more, and believe me, I want that, too. I’m just not sure if I’m ready.” She swallowed and went back to focusing on the neckline of his shirt. “I’m still dealing with a lot of changes in my life.”
“I know.” He cupped her cheek and bru
shed the pad of his thumb over the smooth, light pink skin.
She shook her head, denying his opinion. Her solemn expression changed, the sadness blinking from her eyes as she tilted her head toward his hand and placed a kiss on his palm.
“We better get started,” she murmured. “Tonight, I need to record the routine to send to Sasha. She already knows her side of the performance, and watching us together will better prepare her for working with you.”
He didn’t want to cut their conversation short. In New York and last night, all he could think about was clearing the air. Not only of his Sidney issues, but the ones surrounding her scar, too. He was dying for her to let him in, and every time she held back was a blow to his ego. And now that he’d won her over, the thought of dancing with someone else to finalize this project sat like a lead balloon in his stomach.
One step forward, two steps back.
“Want me to record it on my phone?” He turned, heading to the bench seat to hide his disappointment.
“That’d be great. It’ll save me getting my cell from the kitchen.”
When he turned back around, sterile emotion hit him. There was no joy in Melody’s features. In fact, she was staring at the floor in silent contemplation, her lips downcast in sorrow.
“Are we good, Red?” He wanted to quit the endearment. Saying her name right now would break him. Tonight had turned out better than he anticipated, and yet he was still defeated. He wanted her to lower her guard and trust him. He wanted the giddy, obsession-filled love his best friends seemed to have, not the continuous struggle to tip-toe around issues that didn’t matter to him in the least. Not that he loved her… Fuck. Maybe he did.
She snapped from her daze and raised a brow. “Yeah, why?”
“I don’t want you to worry about us. I’m not going to push, OK?” No matter how bad the nagging pain in his chest became. “If you want me to spend the night, I’ll spend the night. If you don’t—” He shrugged. “—I’ll be fine with that too. For however long it takes. I’ll even help you take those photos down from your wall if you want. I just want us to be together.”
She flashed him a smile. “Thank you.”
Yep, he was falling. Too hard. Too fast. Either that, or someone had slipped some hash into his last meal because his heart was beating a mile a minute. And with the increased sense of vulnerability, he wasn’t sure which cause he’d prefer.
Chapter Twenty-Three
“You’ve nailed it.” Melody smiled up at Sean, enjoying the warmth taking residence in her chest, overpowering the constant ache in her leg. Her tightly compacted insecurities started to unfurl during the last week of rehearsals. He barely left her side. He slept at her house, showered in her bathroom, and even bought groceries to fill her kitchen cupboards. They shared every meal together—breakfast, lunch, dinner, and those midnight after-sex feasts she enjoyed so much. He only disappeared when she had dance classes, and once they were over, he was back at her side, driving her to distraction with his insatiable desire.
He’d been honest in his promise to give her time. He hadn’t pushed for more information on her body issues. And with the sex they’d shared, there hadn’t been one accidental brush of his hand over her scar. It was as if his soul knew hers—the pain, the heartache, all without being told.
She loved that about him. She loved a lot about him.
With every new day, she grew more attached, needing to wake up to his possessive kisses to keep her vulnerabilities in check. The old Melody was no longer a charade she had to maintain. She was rapidly regaining the woman she once was. At least while they were alone.
“I hope so.” He brushed his lips over hers. “Being our last rehearsal and all, I’m kinda glad you finally have confidence in me.”
She rolled her eyes and pushed from his chest. “Stop groping for compliments—”
“I’d grope for much more, but being in a public place, I didn’t think you’d approve.”
“And you’d be right.” She smirked, walking backward to start the routine all over again.
Although Melody was already sensing the heartbreak at handing over the reins to Sasha tomorrow, she’d agreed with Sean that tonight was special. Their last night dancing side by side, body to body, skin to skin. She’d miss their time together, where she could dance again and feel beautiful.
“And I was right about taking you to the park tonight too, wasn’t I?”
“Yes,” she murmured, turning away to break the connection of his delicious stare. “It was a great idea.”
At first, his suggestion to hold their last rehearsal in William Byrd Park had daunted her. Yes, she’d become stronger around Sean, but prying eyes weren’t something she wanted to deal with. The only factor to change her mind was the craving for fresh air after being stuck inside the studio walls for three weeks.
She had driven here from her last dance lesson of the day, Sean following behind her in his pickup as she found a secluded spot of grass. And here they’d stayed, until the sun was almost setting, making Sean’s darkening features all the more masculine as the light faded.
As it was, there was barely anyone around. A small group here, a lone woman or two over there. They weren’t close enough to daunt her, although now that she paid attention, they were more focused with intent on where Sean stood than she originally thought.
The crunch of grass sounded behind her, then his arms, strong and firm, encircled her waist. “I’m proud of you.”
He always praised her, like she was the one learning the routine instead of him. He knew too much—about her body, about her issues, yet she wasn’t entirely sure what he knew at all. She hadn’t been able to lower her defenses and paint the vivid picture of her insecurities. Strength would come with time…she hoped.
Someone cleared their throat nearby, and she spun in his arms, glancing over Sean’s shoulder as he did the same.
“Cameron?” Sean dropped his arms from her waist and turned to face the newcomer, greeting him with a handshake. “What are you doing here?”
The broad man, dressed in black polo shirt and pants, jerked his head toward the man beside him. “Leah called and told Jed and me to turn up tonight.” He glanced at his watch. “We’re a little late. It took longer than I thought to find you.”
“Leah called?”
“Yeah. She said there was some sort of promo gig tonight. She wasn’t sure if you’d score a crowd.”
“Nope.” Sean frowned, and spread his arms to indicate their surroundings. “We’ve been here for over an hour. There’s nobody here. We’re fine.”
Cameron shrugged. “Doesn’t bother me. I still get paid. We’ll split up and get out of your way.”
“Right…” Sean turned to her as the men strode in different directions, making their presence known to the few people hovering in the distance.
“What’s going on?” She stepped into his line of sight, reading the tight expression on his face.
“I don’t know.” He pulled his cell from his back pocket. “I’ll give Leah a call.” He unlocked his screen and frowned.
“Sean? What’s wrong?”
He shot her a glance before focusing back on his screen. “I have a shitload of Twitter notifications.”
“And…”
“And that’s unusual for me.” He tapped his screen, flicking over and over before stopping dead. “Shit.”
“What’s going on?” Her heel tapped against the ground of its own accord. She was too nervous to stop it.
“It looks like Leah shared part of our rehearsal video on the band website.” He ran his hand through his hair. “Fuck. She also announced on the Reckless Twitter account that we’d be here tonight for our final practice.”
“Right…” She had no more words. Her chest pounded in rapid beats while her throat restricted. And like usual, the ache in her leg made itself known. The likelihood that parts of the rehearsal video would be shared had always been a possibility. Sean had done right by her in asking her pe
rmission to forward it to Leah in the first place. This project was about promoting him, after all. She just wished she’d had time to prepare herself.
“What are we going to do?” He pinned her with his disconcerted stare.
“I’m sorry you didn’t gain the attention you would’ve liked. We can still rehearse if you want.” She was torn between disappointment because Sean hadn’t drawn a crowd and relief that their last night hadn’t been ruined. There was no way she could dance in front of a live group of Reckless fans. No way at all.
His face fell, the hardness in his eyes morphing into concern. “Red, she shared the video fifteen minutes ago, and the Twitter status has already been shared nine hundred and eighty seven times. I’m freaking out that we’re going to get mobbed.”
Oh, shit. Her stomach sailed out from underneath her. She did another scan of their surroundings, noting the cars pulling up to the curb in the distance to her right, and the groups of women approaching along the path to her left, in both directions. It was like the zombie apocalypse, only the threat approaching them were women, and their hunger was concentrated on a different part of Sean’s anatomy other than his brain.
“Fucking Leah,” he growled.
“It’s OK.” She bridged the short distance to her handbag nestled in the grass and yanked it onto her shoulder. She was talking to herself, hoping to calm her nerves, but Christ, more cars were pulling up, and the new arrivals were running, trying to get in front of the people already drawing closer. Chatter filled her ears, cat calls, snide comments, too, which were clearly directed at her. “And here you were thinking you weren’t popular.”
Sean shot her a sheepish grin. “You must be my good luck charm.” He reached for her hand, entwining their fingers. “You’re not going to dance with me again tonight, are you?”
She shook her head, diverting her gaze from his hopeful blue eyes. “I’m sorry. I can’t.” Not here, in front of all these people. All she wanted to do was hide, to shield her leg from the strangers vying for a piece of Sean, even though her scars were completely covered. The closer the group swarmed, now calling out questions to Sean, and numerous females confessing their love, the more she noticed the scorn directed her way.
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