by Zavarelli, A
On instinct, my hand came up to his, trying to pry it from the delicate skin around my neck. It had only been a few seconds, but already I couldn’t breathe.
“Please,” I begged.
He slapped my hand away and tightened his grip.
“Don’t fucking move.”
His arousal nudged against my entrance as he squeezed my hip with his other hand to hold me in place. Spots flashed inside of my vision as he tore into me in one deep thrust.
A sob escaped me, and he released my throat and froze. I was burning inside, stretched beyond all comprehension from his rough entrance.
He cursed and leaned back, gripping my thighs as he examined the place where we connected with his fingers.
“Brighton,” he rasped. “Are you a…”
“Yes!” I cried out. “I’m a virgin.”
Another long pause. Tension filled his body, rolling off of him in waves. My own body was tense, and I was still in pain from his invasion.
“That doesn’t make any sense,” he said finally, his voice filled with confusion.
I had no idea what he meant by that, but I was suddenly filled with shame. Tears streamed down my face, and I couldn’t stop them now. The emotions were too much.
He leaned forward again, surprising me as he cradled me in his arms and tried to soothe me. He kissed every inch of my face, wiping my tears away with his lips.
“I didn’t know. You should have told me.”
I didn’t speak, and as much as I hated myself for it, his touch comforted me. He held me for a long time, allowing my body to relax around him. Then his lips found my neck, and he shifted his hips, moving inside of me the tiniest bit.
“How does that feel?” he asked.
“Good,” I admitted.
He kissed me again, long and hard, and he didn’t pull away until we were both breathless.
“You feel so fucking good, Brighton…”
His words trailed off as his breathing grew harder, and my power returned. To know that I was controlling this man in my own little way was a high all its own. I wanted to push him past his breaking point. I wanted to make him vulnerable to me. To take back what he thought was his to wield.
Using his shoulders to steady me, I rocked my hips down against him, urging him to continue. He met me thrust for thrust, his hands wrapping around my waist to guide me. His movements grew deeper, harder, and I knew he was no longer in control of himself.
Something rattled behind me before it clattered to the floor. The table crashed against the wall and creaked with every thrust. I clung to his biceps, and his fingers found my clit.
He was taking back control. I panted for air, sank my nails into his skin. He groaned.
Something fell from the wall, the sound of glass shattering around us. He thrust harder. The objects on the table dug into my back as he leaned over me, biting his way up my neck.
His fingers worked double time, slapping against my sensitive skin with a roughness I never expected to like. Every cell inside of me sang from his touch as I climbed higher and higher.
“Come for me, Brighton,” he demanded. “Come for me right now.”
Fragments of color exploded behind my eyelids as I transcended the laws of gravity. I was flying, soaring, falling… I couldn’t be sure. There was only one way to come down. I exploded into another dimension as I thrashed beneath him, my fingers digging into his back as ripple after endless ripple washed over me.
I clamped down on his cock and he swelled inside of me, letting out a string of curses as he let himself go. Warmth flooded my womb as he growled out his release, nipping at my shoulder until he collapsed on top of me.
“You’ll never have another, Brighton.” He stroked my face. “Not now.”
His words scared and aroused me at the same time. I was certain it was a psychological effect to be flattered by someone wanting you so deeply. But at the same time, this was a man who held the power of my brother’s fate in his hands. And I could never forget that.
“Do you want to know who’s inside of you?” he grazed my swollen lips with his thumb.
Truthfully, I wasn’t so sure. Did I want to see the man who had stolen my virginity? The man who was blackmailing me and would be for the foreseeable future. The man who I was already more confused about than I should be. No, I really didn’t. I wasn’t ready for that. And so I shook my head on instinct.
“I knew your agreeability couldn’t last,” he snarled. “What’s the matter, Brighton? Don’t want to know the monster that’s doing these things to you?”
His voice was so cold it sent a chill through me. I tried to move, to get away, but he held me steadfast, gripping my chin in his hand as he gave me another punishing kiss.
I was completely and utterly used as he lifted my body and pulled out of me. And then his cum dripped down my thigh.
A moment of panic seized me, but he didn’t seem to notice as he shuffled away.
“Are you trying to get me pregnant?” I asked in horror.
“Pregnant?” he sounded every bit as horrified by the idea as I was. “No. But I don’t want anything between us, so you’ll need to get on birth control. Today. I’ve already made an appointment for you.”
I remained silent, unable to process the possible repercussions of this game. He didn’t waste any more time trying to calm me, though. Instead, he snapped something cold and metal onto my wrist.
“This is the GPS tracker,” he said. “Don’t take it off.”
He let the words hang between us, and I didn’t need him to reiterate why. I belonged to him now, clear as the day was long. I blinked back the tears that threatened, wishing I could understand why he was doing this.
He slipped a card into my palm.
“Your appointment is an hour, so you’d better get dressed. I will contact you tonight on your cell phone, and Brighton, I expect you to have it on you at all times.”
I nodded woodenly, surprised when he leaned down and brushed his lips against my cheek. “And don’t even think about taking a shower,” he whispered into my ear.
Chapter Seven
I pulled off the blindfold the minute he walked out the door and attempted to process what was happening. The enormity of what I had just done.
I was horrified and confused, angry and ashamed… but strangely almost all of it was directed at myself. I was horrified that I had liked him inside of me. Confused by my reactions to him. Angry that I’d ever agreed to this, and ashamed for what Brayden would think of me if he ever found out.
But Brayden was everything to me. All of that stuff people said about twins? It was true. He’d already wasted five years of his life rotting in prison for a crime he didn’t commit. A crime that he’d pled guilty to. It didn’t make any sense.
I wanted to ask him about it, but that was one of the specific clauses of the agreement. There would be no discussion with Brayden about anything to do with his case or what I was doing. Not only Brayden but anyone else either. As if I hadn’t isolated myself enough already, this man was going to ensure I continued to do so.
I walked to the bathroom and glanced in the mirror, horrified at what I saw. He had marked me. Everywhere. Bite marks and bruises littered my body from front to back. I braced myself against the counter and took a deep breath. I couldn’t even recognize the girl staring back at me. My hair was a tangled mess, my pale skin flushed. My mascara was smeared beneath my eyes, and it reminded me of Norma-Jean. I hated that.
His cum still dripped down my thigh, and I couldn’t go to the doctor this way. Ignoring his instructions, I turned the shower on to a scalding hot setting and stepped inside.
The marks on my body couldn’t be washed away, but I hoped that my guilt and shame might. Would he know what I had done? I didn’t care. If he had to punish me, so be it. But I needed to feel clean. To feel like I hadn’t just sold my soul to the devil himself.
***
My cl
eansing took a lot longer than it should have. I was late to my appointment, but the doctor waited for me. An hour and one Depo shot later, I headed back to the apartment.
Nicole was waiting for me when I walked inside, and she looked sick with worry.
“Brighton?” her gaze swung to the red mark below my neck. She trembled and put a hand to her mouth. “Oh, God.”
“I’m okay,” I assured her. “I went to meet… an old friend. Things got a little crazy between us that’s all. It’s fine.”
My voice was flat and totally unconvincing. Nicole collapsed onto a stool as her head fell into her hands. “What have I done?”
“What are you talking about?” I took a seat beside her and rubbed her back. “You didn’t do anything wrong.”
She looked at me through bleary eyes and shook her head. “I should have stayed home with you today,” she whispered.
“Nicole, I’m okay, I swear it.” I mustered up a smile for her benefit. “I… I wanted this. It’s like a game. But seriously, I am tired, though. So would you mind if I went to bed?”
“No.” She stood up and grabbed her keys. “You should get some rest. I have errands to run anyway.”
***
I woke to pitch black, and the foreboding sense that something was wrong. When I opened my eyes and saw nothing, it only served to confirm it. I moved my hand to my face in panic when a voice across the room froze me.
“Leave it on,” he said.
Every instinct inside of me told me not to. That I was being stupid earlier when I said I didn’t want to see. Because now, I definitely needed to. To know who this man was. The man that was clearly stalking me.
“I changed my mind.” I reached for the cloth over my eyes.
Before I could remove it, a hand wrapped around my wrist and pulled my arm back into my lap.
“Again,” he said. “Not your decision to make. I agree its better this way.”
“What are you doing in my apartment?” I asked. “My roommate will be home…”
“She’s out with a friend,” he replied.
“How do you know these things about my life?” I croaked.
He pulled me against his chest, smoothing his palm up and down my back as held me close. It was a gesture of comfort, one I really didn’t understand.
“I wanted to check on you,” he said. “To make sure you were alright.”
This time it was regret in his voice, and I wanted to laugh and tell him how ridiculous that was. To pretend he cared about my welfare at all.
“I’m fine.” I pulled away from him, curling my knees into my chest. “So just do what you came here to do.”
He sighed. “That is all I came here to do, Brighton. I was rough with you today. And although I liked the things I did with you very much, I want you to know I would never take things further than that. I’d never really… hurt you.”
Something about the way he said those words, so wracked with emotion, made me believe him. But it changed nothing between us, and I wasn’t dumb enough to think it did. This man was a monster, and I needed to remember that. To remember the reason he was here, in my bedroom, and the pain he had caused my family.
“With that being said,” he continued, the weight of the bed releasing as he stood. “I gave you an order, and you disobeyed me. I will have to punish you for it. There is no leniency in this agreement, and you need to understand that. But I will allow you some time to recover. We’ll meet again on Thursday.”
He leaned down and brushed his lips against my cheek, and I squeezed my eyes shut, trying not feel anything. I wanted to stay numb or angry, because that’s what I thought I should feel.
“Until then…”
His footsteps carried him from the room with a soft click of the door behind him. I waited a full minute until I removed the blindfold. There, on the table beside me were two dozen blood-red lotus flowers.
Chapter Eight
“Brighton?”
I glanced up at Nicole, who was staring at my untouched cereal in front of me. I didn’t know how long it had sat there, but it was soggy now.
“Are you okay? You’ve been acting really strange the last few days.”
I snorted, because she was one to talk. Her face had been a little pale the last few days, and after our encounter the other night, she’d hardly said two words to me. It didn’t bother me since my mind was otherwise preoccupied, but I did wonder why our friendship had become so tense.
“I’m okay.” I gave her a weak smile as I stood and scraped the contents of my bowl into the garbage. “I just have some family stuff going on.”
It was a lie, but I was sure she would believe it. She never shared anything too personal, and it worked for us. The last thing I wanted was someone asking questions about my family.
Her cell phone rang, and she frowned before hitting ignore. Something else she’d been doing a lot lately. My curiosity got the best of me as she walked back to the coffee maker, and a quick glance at the name surprised me. Ryland was calling her, and the fact that she chose to ignore him made me wonder if there was something more going on between them. I tried to swallow the sudden bitterness that coated my tongue as I walked to my room.
I didn’t have any claim on him, of course. It was ridiculous for me to feel any jealousy at all. A man of his caliber would most certainly never date a girl like me, and even if he wanted to, I couldn’t. I had my blackmailer to deal with now, and it would be that way for the foreseeable future. I made myself a promise right then that I was going to stop thinking about Ryland Bennett.
Today was Thursday, which meant I had something more important to worry about. Something dark and terrifying waiting for me inside a hotel room. He had promised me punishment, and I didn’t doubt I would be receiving it. But what he planned to dish out, I had no clue.
Almost as if on cue, my cell phone chirped.
Send me a photo of one of the marks I left on you.
I swallowed as I glanced at my reflection in the mirror, my fingers tracing over the fading marks on my shoulder. Whenever I looked at his brands on my body over the last two days, something strange happened. Even now, my heart beat violently in my chest. My skin was hot and flushed, but I couldn’t understand why. I should have been furious. Repulsed. Disgusted. Horrified. But I was none of those things.
His brand of kink was marking me in every possible way he could think of. At first I’d assumed it was a cruel way to remind me I belonged to him, but now his request made me think otherwise. He was the one who wanted the reminder.
I didn’t know this man. I had no idea what he looked like, other than that he was solid and strong. He was a complete stranger, and yet it seemed he knew my body intimately. As though he knew things about me that even I didn’t. Things I would like. Things that I shouldn’t.
The thought was disturbing on a level I couldn’t even process. But once I’d gotten over my shame in that hotel room, I realized something. Shame couldn’t have a place inside of me if there wasn’t a part of me that had enjoyed it. Enjoyed the terrible things he did to me. What kind of person did that make me?
I closed my eyes and let out a shaky breath, and the phone chimed again.
Don’t make me ask twice, Brighton.
I snatched it up with a glare and turned on the camera, angling it towards my shoulder. No way was I sending him the one he’d left on my inner thigh. I sent the text through and tossed the phone on my bed, resolved not to think about it for the rest of the day.
When I walked to my closet, I chose an outfit that reflected my mood. Black. The dress was a size too large and sort of resembled a paper bag. It had cost me five dollars on a bargain rack three years ago, and it had well and truly seen better days. But I took pleasure in wearing the most unappealing thing I owned. He didn’t deserve my primping.
Which led me to my makeup and hair decisions. I rarely wore much makeup anyway, but today I opted for only the bare minimum of mascara
. My hair was thrown into a messy bun, and I removed my necklace and earrings. I wanted him to know I wasn’t making an effort for him. He wanted control of my body? Fine. But he didn’t control how much time I spent on my appearance.
I held my head high as I walked out the door and left for work. The more distant and cold I could remain in this situation, the better. I’d even managed a smile as I stepped into the elevator. One of my co-workers could barely hide her disdain at my clothing choice. It was all very humorous until I got to my desk.
A blank envelope waited for me. It was your typical run of the mill manila, but my stomach dipped at the lack of anything on the front of it. Sure enough, when I opened it up I found a hotel key card along with a date and time. Seven o’ clock this evening.
I glanced around the office with red cheeks, wondering if anybody had seen who delivered this. But they were all milling around without any notice of me. Or at least that’s what I thought until I saw Matt.
His dark brown eyes met mine across the office, and they held a hint of concern. My gaze dropped, and a moment later, he was in front of me.
“Brighton, are you alright?”
He wrapped his large hands around my arms in a way that reminded me of Brayden. I had the sudden urge to hug him. To confess everything and beg him to help me. Only, he couldn’t, and I was being ridiculous.
“I’m okay.” I gave him a watery smile.
He opened his mouth to respond, but before he could, a sharp voice broke the tension. We both turned to see Ryland summoning him from his office with an icy smile.
Matt cursed under his breath as he released me and walked off. I hoped I would see him again at lunch because I could have used a good dose of his lighthearted humor. But he dashed those hopes when he told me he had to leave the office to work on a project.
I spent the rest of the afternoon at my desk, even working through my lunch break. It wasn’t until Ryland set a yogurt and a banana in front of me that I broke my trance.