by Brooke Moss
I decided to return to the scene of the theft. I wouldn’t allow one incident to ruin Heisler Park for me. I never before had problems in Laguna. Besides, I was the one who left my things alone for two hours. Who’s to say that a caretaker or ground’s worker didn’t pick it all up and throw it away or turn it in somewhere, assuming it was abandoned?
That specific spot called to me. I had to paint the hilltop with the palm trees looking out to sea, surrounded by birds of paradise. There were only a few people wandering around the park; some taking in the diverse sculpture, some leaning over the railing snapping pictures of the serene surroundings.
The easel was set up in a jiffy. My eyes scanned the scene I wished to capture. I started with a light blue wash for the sky, which I layered with other blues and whites for more depth. Then I moved on to the more complex elements of the ocean; water, waves, foam. All of these were subtly different. I added the trees and flowers last. Just as I was tackling the tide, rushing onto the shore below, my phone alerted me to a text. My heart skipped a beat. It was from Elijah.
You should have stayed for breakfast. I made French toast. It was delicious. Lunch?
I smiled and bit my lip. He wanted to see me again, and right away. I liked this. No games, no allotted time in between contact. The man was genuine. I always went the safe way, I went where I didn’t have to give a hundred percent of myself. I felt, like maybe, I was ready to make a change. Ready to experience a real depth of emotion again. I was tired of playing it so close to the vest. I felt ready for my true self to emerge, in more ways than one.
A: I’m in the middle of a painting. Otherwise, I would love to. Dinner?
E: Dinner. I’ll pick you up at 7. Address, please.
While I typed in my address, my heart fluttered another time or two. The thought of spending another night with Elijah excited me. I felt a surge of creative inspiration and finished the painting in record time. Although, I had churned it out more quickly than normal, it was still one of the best scenes I had ever finished. It was a little past three when I packed up my easel. Watercolors dried fast, especially in the warm, California sun. So, I left it in the drawer of my fabulous new easel.
I practically skipped all the way back home. The day was successful all around. I had awoken in the arms of a fantastic guy, made progress on the benefit, and completed a painting. Now, I was looking forward to a romantic dinner with Elijah. How things had changed in 48 hours.
CHAPTER SIX
After a long, luxurious bath, I prepped for the evening. Not about to veer from my usual simple style, but wanting to kick it up a notch, I decided on my favorite little black dress. It had a 1950’s feel with thin spaghetti straps, and an A-line skirt. Shoes would be easy, especially since I only had one pair of dressy heels. Years ago, I had scored a pair of black leather Jimmy Choo pumps, which I’d acquired for a steal at a second-hand store. I gave my hair a blowout, something I almost never did and was pleased with the results. My shoulder length, auburn hair was soft and voluminous, rather than flat against my head. I forced myself to stop touching it. Jude would be proud of me for actually styling it, for once.
At a quarter till seven, I was ready to go. Waiting seemed an endless torture. I filled the time by applying some mascara and lip gloss. Now, I was really ready. Headlights shined in through my windows and alerted me to Elijah’s arrival. I picked up my black, vintage handbag and walked out the door.
“What a great place.” Elijah stepped out of his show-stopping car. “Wow, Alice. You look incredible.”
He smiled and walked toward me, reaching out for my hand. When I slipped my small hand in his, he brought it up to his lips and kissed it softly. In response, I pushed myself upward, landing my own kiss right on his cheek.
“Alright you, in you go. We have reservations at La Plage.”
La Plage was a new, immensely popular fine-dining restaurant, perched right over the beach. The views would be spectacular, but it would be a little chilly if we sat outside.
“I just need to run back in and grab a sweater.” I re-emerged a minute later with a black cardigan draped over my arm. “Now, I’m all set.”
Elijah stood waiting exactly where I left him. He walked around to the passenger side of the car and opened the door for me. I bit my tongue on the comment that I could open my own door. Elijah was a gentleman. There wasn’t any need to highlight the fact I wasn’t used to this sort of treatment. The ride to the restaurant would be a short one, everything in Laguna was fairly close together. Elijah surprised me once again, by placing my hand on the stick shift, then putting his hand over mine.
“This way I can hold your hand, while I drive,” he said, with a sheepish grin.
The restaurant was stunning. Huge floor to ceiling windows provided views throughout the space. Glittering chandeliers, white-covered tabletops, romantic lighting, and tuxedoed servers created an opulent, if not intimidating, environment. Since the night was cool, the host asked if we would rather sit inside.
“Up to you, Alice. What would you prefer?” Elijah looked to me.
“I don’t mind sitting outside.” Even after all this time, I never passed up an opportunity to be near the water.
Elijah smiled. “I hoped you would say that.”
We were seated at what appeared to be the best table, on the very front of the patio. It had sweeping views of the beach and water. An added bonus was the unobtrusive, outdoor heater positioned right behind us. It was already on, glowing warmly when we sat down. Our server placed our snow-white napkins in our laps, told us the specials, then left us to mull over the menu. Instead of perusing the list of food, my attention focused on the waves.
“I hate to make you look away, Alice, but I think he’ll be back soon and annoyed we haven’t made a decision. What looks good? And which wine do you prefer?”
“Right, let’s see. I’m not picky about wine, you choose.” In reality, I knew nothing about wine, other than I enjoyed drinking it.
“The sea, it never gets old, you know?” I said, while trying to decipher the French menu.
“I know exactly what you mean. When I’m feeling my worst, I can always take a walk on the beach and feel immediate stress relief.”
I looked up at Elijah, who was now watching the waves in the same manner I was. I felt the same about the ocean. I discovered we had more and more in common. His emerald eyes had a dreamy quality, which was familiar. The sea did that to people. It calmed their souls and allowed them to see the depth and beauty of life. He looked back at me, and we held each other’s gaze until the server returned. He did seem rather annoyed we hadn’t decided on dinner. I told Elijah to go first. He ordered a wine I had never heard of and a filet. Easy enough, I closed my menu and ordered the same. I’d had enough of trying to figure out the meaning of the French words, anyway.
Once the server had collected our menus and departed our table, Elijah took my hand, kissing it, again. This time, he turned my hand upward, spread my fingers and lightly kissed the fleshy center of my palm, which sent chills through me.
“You better stop. We have a whole meal to get through,” I teased.
Elijah’s eyes sparkled mischievously. “I can’t help myself. You do something to me, Alice. I can’t explain it. I’m just thankful to have met you. If you’re ready, I’d like to jump in with both feet. I’m not into playing games.” Elijah looked straight into my eyes, holding my gaze.
I felt my face heat. I couldn’t help but feel trepidation. Relationships like this don’t spring up out of nowhere, especially with a sexy man you met three days ago. Maybe it could. I didn’t say anything for now, needing to think about my response.
The wine and the meal were perfection. We ate slowly, talking about, of all things, our childhood.
“I can’t believe you’ve lived in Laguna your whole life. You’ve never wanted to try out a new place?”
“Why not? You’ve lived in Los Angeles your whole life. What’s the difference? And no, I’m good, rig
ht where I am.”
“I guess there isn’t much difference. But, I’ve moved around L.A. a lot. It’s huge. You can move to a different part of the city and it’s like a whole new world. There isn’t much to Laguna, as far as space goes.”
“I don’t know if I buy your reasoning, but ok. Laguna is small, quaint. That’s what I love about it. I don’t need all the nonsense of a big city.”
“Well, you have arguably the most beautiful beaches in California, so I’ll give you the point.” He smiled and gave me a little wink. “Tell me more about your grandmother. How long has she lived in her cottage?”
“More than fifty years. She and my grandfather built it by hand. It was a labor of love, she always said.”
“No way. That’s incredible. There’s really something about creating with your own two hands. How long were they married?”
“Forty-eight years. My grandfather died three years ago. She’s refused to go on so much as one date since, even though there are a couple of gentleman around who would love the chance to take out Sylvie. She says she had her love. Lightening doesn’t strike twice.”
“She has a lot of great sayings,” laughed Elijah. “And she isn’t wrong.”
I nodded. “She’s pretty much my favorite person. Speaking of favorites, I hope Charlie is doing well today. I wanted so badly to see him. He is on the very top of my list for tomorrow morning.”
“We’ll go together. I called this afternoon. He’s doing much better. Even better than expected this early on, they said.”
I was so happy to hear this. It made my heart full to think of Charlie healthy, swimming out to sea. I don’t know why I hadn’t thought to call, but was so grateful to Elijah for being so thoughtful. I had avoided addressing the elephant in the room long enough.
“What you said before, about jumping into this with both feet? That was sweet, Elijah. I’m just a little gun shy. Honestly, you’ve taken me aback with your kindness. I have a lot of horror stories.”
“I understand. I probably have more reason than you do to be nervous about beginning a new relationship. But, everything about you feels right. I don’t want to take what I’m feeling for you for granted.”
“What do you mean? Why should you be nervous about a new relationship? Please explain.” Suddenly, alarm bells went off in my brain, and my stomach felt upset. The statement needed more clarification.
With the meal over and the check paid for, Elijah suggested we walk down to the beach to finish our conversation. If he wanted privacy, it must be bad. I hoped whatever he was about to share wouldn’t ruin what had just begun.
CHAPTER SEVEN
With my shoes in hand, Elijah and I walked along the shore. We stopped, stood in the surf, and looked out to the sea. He hadn’t said much since we left the restaurant and I didn’t want to prod him. I figured he would open up when he felt comfortable, but with each passing minute, I became more nervous.
“Let’s sit down, up on the dry sand,” I suggested.
“Are you sure you want to sit in your dress?”
“It’s just a little sand. I live in it, and well, we’ll be more comfortable.”
We walked up the beach until we came to an area of smooth, dry sand. I plopped down. The night was clear with stars twinkling. There was only a sliver of moon. It was fairly dark, but the light from the streets nearby allowed us to see each other well enough. Several people walked further down the beach. Luckily, we were isolated where we sat. I buried my toes in the coolness of the sand and waited for Elijah to begin.
“Well, I guess there’s no point in beating around the bush.” Elijah situated himself on the sand. “I was going to wait a little longer to tell you, hoping it’d turn out to not be a big deal. Or, maybe I was only hoping to not scare you off.”
This did not sound good. Was he married? I felt like I could throw up. I certainly had a knack for attracting the wrong kind of guys. Mysterious, hot guy sets up house in a beach town to seduce local girls. Where have I heard that before? Nothing would surprise me. I hoped against hope I was wrong.
“About a month ago, I signed the papers finalizing my divorce. If I’m being honest, it was pretty ugly.” He kept his head down and avoided my gaze.
“A month ago?” I repeated. “That is very recent. So, I’m like a rebound or something?”
Great, it was almost as bad as my original thought. I felt like I’d been punched in the gut. Freshly divorced was not good. He was naturally going to want to revel in his new-found freedom, not immediately dive into a relationship. Who wouldn’t want to explore their independence after a divorce, especially one that hadn’t been pretty? I should have listened to my gut in the first place. I allowed myself to get attached, when I needed to continue being cautious.
“No, no. You aren’t a rebound, Alice. Please, hear me out. I’m not quite finished.” Elijah spoke quickly, finally meeting my eyes. Not quite finished? How could this get better?
“The divorce was a disaster. My wife. My ex-wife was sleeping around. She’s an actress and was known for having affairs with her co-stars. Known to everyone but me. I felt like such a fool when I found out. The sad thing was, the marriage had been over in all but name, long before I found out about her extracurricular activities. We’d been unhappy for years. However, I couldn’t cut the cord. Maybe in some way, I was to blame, always busy with my own work. I’m truly sorry I didn’t tell you before. In my defense, this--us happened so quickly, a good time hadn’t presented itself.”
Elijah leaned back on his hands, apparently finished with his story. His profile was as perfect as the rest of him. My heart wanted nothing more than to open up to Elijah, to fully let him in. But, I’d experienced too much to believe this was anything other than what it seemed. I was a rebound, pure and simple, even if he didn’t mean for me to be. Elijah and I would run our course, and quickly. How many men fell in love a month after a nasty divorce, then lived happily ever after? My money was on none. There were too many emotional entanglements.
“You’re not saying anything, Alice. Can you please tell me what you’re thinking?”
“I’m sorry for what you’ve been through with your wife. Elijah, I really like you. I haven’t liked anyone in a really long time. But, this is only going to end one way. It’s going to end with me nursing a broken heart. Even you, as nice a guy as you are, have to see this?”
Elijah turned toward me and sat straight. “I don’t see it that way, at all. You’re very special, Alice. You are the someone I’ve been waiting for, the someone I’ve known all along is out there.”
I wanted to jump into his arms. I really did. But, my sense of self-preservation won out. “I want to believe everything you’re saying. I believe you believe it. The reality is, we just met. You don’t know the first thing about me.”
“I know you’re creative, passionate, fun, and caring. You care about this place, about your grandmother, and about a seal we saved from death. I know a lot about you, Alice. What I don’t know, I’ll learn.”
It took all my power not to cry. I felt like I had been doing a lot of that lately. My insides were in turmoil, and only half of it had to do with Elijah. My life was a mess. I turned my head away, taking deep breaths, to no avail. I just couldn’t believe, deep down, this was real. I couldn’t believe Elijah could care for me this much, this quickly. My life wasn’t a fairy tale. These things simply didn’t happen. I had enough experience to know men like Elijah didn’t really exist. Looking down at the sand, tears in my eyes, I whispered, “I’m sorry, Elijah. I just can’t. It will turn ugly, I know it.”
Standing up as quickly as I could, I walked away from Elijah and back toward home.
Behind me, I heard him call, “At least, let me take you home.”
“It’s not far, I’ll be fine.” I answered and kept walking. I needed to be alone. The tears needed to fall without Elijah bearing witness.
CHAPTER EIGHT
These last few days had been a roller coaster of emotions.
Meeting Elijah had stirred me in so many ways. He’d ignited my passion, opened my heart, and offered himself as a partner. The rescue would suffer now. I couldn’t see how we could possibly move forward as a team to pull off this event. Elijah could always do it without me, I guess. His friends and contacts were the heavy hitters, after all. My heart felt a pang at the thought of not being involved, but if he could help the rescue, it was all that mattered.
I couldn’t walk the beach all the way to my little house, so I put my heels back on and pounded the pavement. By the time I made it to my front porch, I could feel the start of at least three blisters. It was still better than riding home with Elijah. The atmosphere would have been awkward, to say the least. I set my shoes down inside the door, pulled off my dress, and threw it into the corner. I slipped into bed in just my panties. It seemed like too much effort to put on pajamas, wash my face, and brush my teeth. All I could think about was Elijah’s face in the starlight as I left. The one glance told me all I needed to know. My words had punched him in the gut, just as his words had struck me. He wasn’t perfect, no one was. Even so, he was the closest version of perfect I had ever met.
I was sorry to wound Elijah. In hurting him, I’d injured myself, too. One fact remained, I had lived without him in my life for twenty-nine years. I would be just fine. I rationalized this over and over, as I begged my body to fall asleep. Instead of helping, my thoughts made me feel worse. I’d never quite believed anyone who said, “I cried myself to sleep.” But I believed them now.
I woke the next morning full of despair. I allowed myself one last, good, long cry in the shower. Once I was out, I told myself to dry it up. It was what it was. I’d made my choice, now I had to face it like a big girl. Going to visit Charlie seemed like the best option for my morning. I donned some shorts and a tank top and walked over to borrow Sylvie’s jeep.