by Ana Sparks
I tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, whispering, “I think we just showed this apartment who we are.”
“It was a necessary introduction. But it knocked me out,” she said, giggling.
“I don’t know what I would have done if you’d have left me,” I laughed. “Imagine if you were on that plane right now.”
“Worse. I’d be on a layover in Vancouver, wondering why I had ever left.”
I nuzzled closer to her, kissing her shoulder. I could sense she was already falling asleep, safe in the comfort of my arms. The world outside could continue its mad race.
“You saved me, you know that?” I asked her. “You saved me from a horrible life in New York. You brought me back to my family. You made me realize that living is important. After so many years of not really knowing the reason for being here or being who I was.”
“Same,” she whispered back.
We slept after that. We slept far past noon the next day, both exhausted from all that had happened. We woke together, rejuvenated and alive, ready to build a life. One that was worlds better than the past, because we were together. Side by side, hand in hand, we would make it. Against all odds.
Epilogue
Ruby
The first few months at the new apartment were perfect. Billy and I worked slowly, picking out furniture and painting walls. Billy started a new gig downtown, working in real estate, of all things. I threw myself into the decoration of the apartment, making a house a home, and I found, very soon, that I absolutely loved it. The detail. The way you could bring a room to life with just a towel here, an accent line there. I had fully given up on my acting career (it wasn’t really my “crowd,” anyway), and began to hunt around for interior design gigs. Funnily enough, I found a job at a nearby acting studio, where I began decorating the sets for various student films.
Remarkably, I soon found that I was rather good at it. The students loved me, as I was just a few years older, without the arrogance of normal actors. They even allowed me to step in and read a few lines here and there, playing a few background roles.
One particular director took a serious liking to me and brought me along to a bigger studio, where he told the big wigs, “Ruby knows what she’s doing with sets. If you don’t hire her, then I’ll walk.” It was a big thing to say, especially given that most studios already had their set people. But when the studio looked at my portfolio, they had nothing to say but, “When can you start?”
Thanks to my new career, I was able to afford to renew my visa—this time, for ten years. It seemed everything had fallen into place for me.
Back in Coventry, my mother had stopped “waiting” for me to come home. She was dating, finally, and funnily enough, had met a man from Boston who was on a work visa in the UK. She was head-over-heels for him, and they planned on visiting L.A. for Christmas. I was so happy that she had someone to take care of her, and I was excited to see her and meet her new beau.
Billy had helped his father, Daniel, find a luxurious condo nearby, one far better than the shack he’d resided in for years. I helped with the decorating, finding myself there with Daniel many nights a week, laughing over take-out dinners and rolling maroon paint over bathroom walls. He was a spritely man, always game for a shot of whiskey, and I found, in him, the father I had lost.
Each night, when I returned to Billy, he took my hand and told me—with glistening eyes—how glad he was that I was part of the family. How glad he was that I hadn’t left them all behind.
That year, Billy’s father decided to have Thanksgiving at his house. It was to be a small affair, initially. But Daniel met a woman about a month before, and decided to bring her along. Leandra had also recently picked up a new boyfriend, a man named Tyler went to get his hair cut at her salon, just to “see her pretty smile.”
“Can he come to Thanksgiving, Billy Jay?” she had asked, a few weeks before. “I know he wants to meet you.”
“Is this going to be another guy who comes in and out of our lives, just like that? You always toss them away after a few weeks, Leandra,” Billy had teased her. “I don’t want to like another one of them, just to see them go.”
“He’s different,” Leandra had said, grabbing his ear. “I think you’ll love him. And that’s it. I’m not asking for permission. He’s coming, whether you like it or not.”
The night before Thanksgiving dinner, I stayed up late, manning the pumpkin and apple pies and the stuffing I’d promised to make. Billy was poring over a collection of real estate expense pages. This was to be my first Thanksgiving since coming to America. In five years, I’d never had a stable enough relationship with anyone to hitch myself onto their family holidays. I’d never bothered to give it a chance, always thinking my “real” life would begin either when I returned home or got an acting gig.
But real life always happened. It was happening all around you.
“Shit!” I burnt my hand as I removed the pumpkin pie from the oven, waving it around after I smashed the platter onto the stovetop.
Billy raced to my side moments later, lifting my finger to his mouth. He kissed it softly, then ran his tongue along the reddened skin. “Baby, be careful.”
I grinned, waving the towel between us. “Help with the last two?”
I watched him work from behind, easing the two platters from the oven and placing them on towels, stretched out over the counter. His muscles rippled as he moved, showing me his incredible strength. He hadn’t ‘let himself go’ since moving back to Los Angeles. In fact, he seemed to stand taller, to smile more. I hoped I gave him that.
We made love on the kitchen floor after that, as the pies cooled. He ripped open my dress, no longer the black and torn one from the year past, but a new one. With money coming in from all sides, material possessions no longer seemed so important. We always had food to eat. We had each other, and that was all that mattered.
The next day, we dressed early, kissing in the soft light of the Thanksgiving morning. Having never been anywhere else in America, I’d been told that Thanksgiving was meant to be chilly and snowy. But in Los Angeles, it was bright and sunny, with people driving with their windows down. We loaded up the back of the car with the pies and stuffing, along with several bottles of wine, and then slid into the front seat. Billy cranked the engine and the radio, which emitted Christmas songs into the car.
As we drove, I held my stomach gently with my hands.
The familiar condo was already decked out in Christmas lights, which Daniel had strung himself. He flung open the door with gusto when we pulled into the driveway, waving for his new girlfriend to come forward. As we approached with the food, the woman, perhaps in her early 60s, wrapped her hands around the pie and gave me a knowing look. When she spoke, her voice was the warmest I had heard in years. I knew Daniel was with the right type of person.
“Darling, you’re absolutely glowing,” she said. “It’s wonderful to meet you. I’m Linda.”
“Good to meet you, as well.” I followed her into the kitchen, which I had painted myself—a light blue, with matte white tiles lining the walls. We placed the pies on the counter and eased the stuffing into the oven to warm.
Leandra and Tyler arrived moments later, pulling up on Tyler’s motorcycle. Daniel muttered something about, “Those things are so dangerous. Don’t see how she does this to herself,” but then was the first at the front step, throwing his arms around her when she arrived.
Every few minutes, I checked Billy’s face. Always, he seemed to beam with joy at his surroundings. Always, he seemed amazed that any of this was really happening. That his family was a close-knit unit again, after his being away so long.
As we chattered at the table, with several people sipping wine, Leandra brought her hand skyward. It twinkled with a ring.
“I don’t want you to freak out,” she said, speaking mostly to Daniel. “But last night, Tyler and I got engaged.”
Billy and Daniel’s jaws dropped. Linda reached toward the hand, eyein
g the stone appreciatively. “Wow,” she whispered, shaking her head.
Tyler’s broad shoulders shifted. He held onto Leandra tightly, sensing this was an awkward moment for her. “I know I didn’t ask your permission, but you guys should know that, although we haven’t been dating long, Leandra has changed my life for the better. I didn’t see any reason to wait.”
“And I couldn’t see any reason to wait to say yes,” Leandra said, shrugging. They shared a kiss in front of us, one of pure, sweet love.
I brought my hands to my mouth, in total awe at the effect love could have on people. A single tear crested my cheek.
“You’ll give us your blessing, Daddy, won’t you?” Leandra asked, turning to Daniel. Her voice was meek, almost pleading. “Because I don’t know how I’d feel if you didn’t. I’d feel so empty, Daddy.”
Daniel paused for a long time. All eyes were upon him as he glanced from Leandra, to Tyler, to me. Linda coaxed him, placing her hand on his shoulder. “I know it’s a lot to take in.”
But after a moment, he let out an almost wild laugh, one of joy. He nodded to himself, then brought his hand to Leandra’s, on top of the table. “I would never, ever do anything to split up this family, Leandra. And least of all, turn away someone who wants to be a part of it. Tyler, dammit. I bless your union.” He reached forward and gripped Tyler’s hand, shaking it.
A feeling of relief passed through all of us. Billy reached forward and shook Tyler’s hand, filling the silence. “Goodness gracious, big sister. What news. What amazing news.” He paused, bringing his arm back around my shoulders. “But if it’s all the same to you guys, I think we should eat. I’m starving! All this happiness makes a man hungry.”
We did. We loaded up our plates with American food, tucking in quickly, and then going back for more. The succulent turkey. The yams. The cranberry sauce (whatever it was for, I loved it). The mashed potatoes, coated with dripping gravy. We ate, and the others drank. I held my hand on my stomach, knowing that our own secret would come pouring out of me soon.
I just wasn’t sure when to say it. I didn’t want to detract from Leandra and Tyler’s announcement. I didn’t want to change the focus from such a gorgeous holiday.
I’d taken the pregnancy test over a month ago, and it had read back a pink, wonderful plus sign. It had taken me a few days to tell Billy, holding up the bag I had filled with positive pregnancy tests and saying, with tear-filled eyes, that he was going to be a dad.
I knew his complicated feelings about his father. We had never discussed children, not outside of an abstract sense. But when he had held the bag, looking at each positive test, I watched as tears began to form in his eyes, as well. As he began to understand that his life was about to change, for the better.
He would be a father. He could rectify any mistakes his father had made with him. He could show this child a different world and he could work on building a better one, before that.
“Why aren’t you drinking?” Leandra asked, her fork poised over her pumpkin pie. Her eyes were showed that she was already tipsy, but filled with humor. “You don’t have big news too, do you?”
I’d been caught. Glancing toward Billy Jay, we savored the last moment of our secret together. He wrapped his arm around my shoulder, bringing me closer to him. Daniel, Linda, Tyler, and Leandra were waiting with bated breath, no longer eating or drinking.
After what seemed like a small eternity, I nodded. I nearly burst into tears with joy. Gripping Billy’s hand, I whispered, “You tell them. It’s your family.”
“We do have news,” Billy said. He rose up from his chair, bringing me with him. “We’re having a kid, guys. We’re going to be parents!”
The next few minutes went by in a happy blur. Before I knew it, everyone was kissing me, pressing me for information. Daniel was uncorking a bottle of champagne he’d had on-hand for “years,” apparently, and Linda was telling me every single remedy she could think of for morning sickness.
It was the most gorgeous occasion. Surrounded by loved ones, in a place that had recently become my home, I felt fulfilled in every way. I was amazed at the power of time, at what happens when you take a few risks. If I hadn’t gone for a drink with Billy Jay that day, or coined Claire Harrington’s name, I never would have had this.
Maybe Billy Jay and I would go to London someday. Maybe we would ride the London Eye and hold hands, with our son or daughter between us. I’d show him Coventry, and introduce him to my favorite foods and childhood places. We’d watch our child play on the swings I played on when I was little.
Clark Lambert would be a distant memory. All thoughts of fear would be stamped out, for good.
But in reality, we didn’t need fantastical ideas of London. All we really needed was right there, in Silver Lake, Los Angeles, on the Pacific Coast. We were the last people to see the sun set. And we soaked up every second of it, side-by-side. Together.
The End
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