My heart pounds and my pulse races. I want to lean against him. My legs are still shaking from the run-in with evil-Harper, but I take a step away and face him, adopting an even tone. “That’s not important right now. You wanted the express lane, so let’s stay on it.”
He holds my gaze for a second, then nods. “What did Fate say about me?”
“He said you’re Corvus, a kind of enforcer who keeps balance.”
Ethan’s dark eyebrows lift. “Balance of what?”
I shrug. “I don’t know. He told me you exist outside of our realm, and that he can’t see your fate, but you have a destiny.”
“That doesn’t make any sense,” Ethan grumbles, eyes narrowed in disbelief. “I eat, breathe, sleep, and bleed. I exist like everyone else.”
“Since you came back, you move much faster, you’re more muscular, and you’ve grown at least an inch. Your body has changed. You’ve changed, even if you don’t remember why.”
When Ethan suddenly stills, I soften my tone. “Think about it. You’ve never been in any of my dreams about my next day, even though I spend hours with you. Why do you think that’s the case? Fate said if I wanted to know more about the Corvus I should ask the Order.”
His eyebrows shoot up. “The Corvus? As in plural?”
I nod. “Apparently there are more like you.”
Wonder flits through his eyes before he scrubs his hands down his face, growling in frustration. “What’s this Order?”
“I didn’t run across anything about your kind of Corvus or the Order in my raven research.”
“Why were you researching ravens?”
“I figured while you were gone I’d work on a journal, collecting every bit of information on ravens, swords, tattoos, basically anything I could get my hands on to help you come to terms with your tattoo. I planned to give it to you when you came back.” My lips twist downward. “Of course, I had no clue you were out discovering who and what you are on your own.”
“Nara.” Ethan reaches for me, but I step back.
“I gave you the journal on Saturday, but you left it behind. I’ll get it for you.”
As I turn toward the stairs, Ethan falls into step behind me. I stop and gesture to the couch. “Wait here. I’ll be right back.”
Before he can say anything, I bolt upstairs, Houdini in fast pursuit behind me.
Once I’m upstairs, I take a few minutes to calm down. I can’t let Ethan touch me and draw me in. For both our sakes, I have to stay focused until he remembers and can tell me where he was and what he was doing. Keeping things platonic is for the best.
The sad look Ethan gives me from his position on the sofa when I come back downstairs sets me on edge, but I shrug off the tension and set the books in his lap.
His big hands instantly grip them as I sit down, leaving a cushion between us. “Two books?”
“That’s the journal I worked on.” I nod to the leather bound book. Pointing to the other book, I continue, my voice turning husky with sadness. “And the blue one with the metal corners and spine findings was Freddie’s.”
Ethan reads the title out loud: Ravens. He glances my way as he flips through it. “A book all about caring for ravens? This is the book Drake killed Freddie for? Why?”
“Yes, he killed Freddie for this book. I’m pretty sure he wanted the book because he was looking for this…” I trail off as I hold up the silver triskele necklace my grandmother left for me. Then I lower the charm near the identical symbol on the book’s spine until it suddenly adheres. As soon as the charm locks to the book, the metal finding on the bottom of the spine pops open.
“What the—?” Ethan lifts the book and peers into the empty space behind the print and the spine’s binding.
While Ethan pokes his finger inside, I nod to the book. “This is how we’re connected, through the ravens. My grandmother saved this necklace for me until I turned seventeen. Freddie had kept this book safe for almost thirty years. Both my grandmother and Freddie were given these items separately and at different times, but each item came from a mysterious blond man who told them to keep them safe and they would know what to do with them when the time came.”
Bafflement travels across Ethan’s features before he returns his gaze to the book and shakes it trying to see if anything falls out. “This hiding spot is empty. Was there something hidden inside?”
I nod. “It held a small scroll of parchment paper.”
Ethan lowers the book, excitement in his gaze. “What did it say?”
“I can’t remember.”
“What do you mean you can’t remember?”
I twist my lips and pick at the seam on my jeans. “As soon as I looked at it, the paper disintegrated in my hands. It literally turned to dust.”
He blinks, then shakes his head slowly. “And you really can’t remember what was on it?”
“I know it had something to do with ravens.” Sighing, I worry my lip with my teeth. “I’ve tried to remember, but I can’t picture what was on the paper at all.”
“So it’s lost forever then.”
His obvious disappointment tightens my chest. “I believe I was meant to see it, since I was led to it. Hopefully I’ll be able to remember what it said when the time comes.” I spread my hands wide and shrug. “Whenever that is.”
Ethan raises an eyebrow.
His skepticism makes me doubt myself. I grip the couch cushion. “I have to believe that, Ethan. I couldn’t live with myself if I thought Freddie kept the secret within that book safe all those years, then lost his life for nothing.”
As my lips start to tremble, Ethan grips my shoulder. “I’m just trying to process all the strangeness, Nara. If I only had one person I could depend on, I would choose you. No matter who the stranger was who gave your grandmother and Freddie these items to keep them safe for you, one thing I know for sure is that he picked the very best person.”
When I dip my head, appreciating the fact he still believes in me despite the tension between us, his hand falls away and my gaze shifts to Freddie’s book. “The question is…who was that man and what did he pick me for?”
Ethan grins. “When the time comes, you’ll know.”
I snort, warming to Ethan’s amused response. “Well, others obviously want Freddie’s book. They don’t know I’ve discovered its secret. You heard Harper. She wants it and that guy you fought in the hall wanted it too. That’s why he attacked me. He planned to give it to someone he said would ‘be my worst nightmare.’”
His gaze locks with mine. “You said Drake wasn’t entirely human. I got that same sense from that girl today too. Pure evil rolled off her. I’ve never wanted to hurt another person as much as I did when I saw her grab you.”
He appeared to be acting on instinct earlier. What drove that? “What did you feel when you thought she would hurt me?”
“Dead calm, then cold fury. An absolute knowing that she must be eliminated.” He seems a little surprised by his response, but plunges on, his tone building in assurance, “Whatever that evil is…it should never have gotten so close to you, let alone attacked you. I wasn’t going to let her walk away.”
There isn’t an ounce of hesitation in his statement now. His unyielding “must be eliminated” viewpoint instantly reminds me of the enforcer label Fate had given the Corvus. I blink as I realize the changes that’d happened to Ethan while he was gone haven’t left him; the base instincts are just simmering under the surface, muffled by his memory loss. That means he’s not totally defenseless. I just need to figure out a way to help him tap into them again. “Those were your thoughts, but what did you physically feel?”
Ethan rolls his right shoulder. “After she knocked me back, my shoulder burned as if it was on fire, which is weird because I hit my back on the building, but I just ignored the pain and followed the tightness in my gut. It felt like a rope had been lashed between us. Each time I took a breath, my lungs burned and the rope tightened, tugging me forward. It took everything ins
ide me not to attack that thing as soon as I saw her. If you hadn’t been standing in the way, I would’ve gone after her instantly.”
If I helped trigger this feeling before, maybe I can again. “I have an idea that might help you remember.” I scoot close, then lean across him and curl my left hand over the top of his right shoulder. Tapping his back, I hold myself still and try not to react to him leaning closer to me. “Is this where your shoulder burned?”
Ethan rests his cheek against mine for a second, then he suddenly stiffens and grips my wrist. “You’re touching my tattoo. I thought you were talking about a real sword earlier.”
When he starts to get up, I clamp my fingers tight to keep him seated. “Close your eyes and picture what happened with Harper. Think about how you felt when she attacked me.”
Ethan sets his jaw, but closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. A second passes, then two. His breathing increases and he rolls his shoulder like I saw him do by the field house. I thrum my fingers on the back of his shoulder. “You’re burning here, aren’t you?” When he dips his head once, I say, “Now imagine if she’d thrown me like she did you. Hold on to that thought.”
Ethan hisses out in pain, then jumps up and quickly tugs his jacket and shirt off. As he drops his clothes, I stare in amazement at the sight of the hilt of his sword tattoo sliding over the curve of his shoulder, then turning, the raven-feathered blade following around the bulge of his bicep.
“What the hell?” he grates while the ink continues to snake around his arm at a rapid pace. He turns his hand to the ground, palm down and flexes his fingers. When the point of a very real sword starts to emerge behind his fingers, Ethan dips his head back and a moan of pain erupts from deep in his throat.
By the time I reach his side, he’s holding the sword decorated with a raven’s feather along the blade and a raven yin-yang symbol near the hilt. His arm flexed inward, the blade’s tip touching the floor, Ethan lowers his chin and exhales deeply, his once blue eyes pitch black. His face is pale, and shock reflects in his expression, yet his grip on the sword is tight with instinctual confidence.
“I’m so sorry, Ethan. When you let me feel it forming right on your back before, you didn’t act like you were in pain.”
Ethan swallows a few times, but doesn’t speak. Did I push him too far, too fast? Guilt knots my stomach and before I realize what I’m doing, I lay my hand on his chest. “Are you okay?”
His gaze slowly comes into focus, natural blue starting to swirl with the black color. “Nara?”
With that one word, he’s asking a zillion questions I can’t answer. I shake my head slowly and curl my fingers into a fist on his chest. “That’s all I know.”
I shift, intending to step back, but Ethan grasps my waist in a tight hold. “Stay.”
How is he holding me with both hands? I start to glance down, but the sword is already returning to his body; the tattoo is curling back up his arm, sliding around the defined muscles, moving toward the slope of his shoulder.
Once the hilt disappears over his shoulder, Ethan pulls me forward and touches his forehead to mine. “Please, Nara. Just for a minute.” His grip might be firm, but his body quakes under my palms. I stay put.
A full minute passes as we breathe in and out, then Ethan exhales deeply and slides his nose along my cheek. His intensity and appealing smell wreak havoc on my resistance. My hands itch to run along his warm skin, to explore the bulk of his muscles. It takes everything inside me not to press against him.
Ethan’s fingers dig into my spine, pressing me closer. Before we connect fully and I lose total control, I force myself to step out of his hold. Picking up his shirt and jacket, I adopt a crooked smile. “At least now I know how you retrieved your sword when you were dressed in a suit jacket. Been wondering about that.”
Disappointment is evident in the wry twist of his lips, but he takes his clothes and shrugs into them. “I hope you’re right and that gets easier. Felt like my arm was turning inside out.” Sliding his hands in his jacket pockets, he asks, “Do you know where this Harper girl lives?”
“No, I don’t. And she doesn’t know where I live either. For now we need to focus on your memory.”
His body tenses. “When I find her, she’ll tell me who wants that book and why.”
I shake my head in fast jerks. “Ethan, whatever Harper is, you’re not ready to face her yet. I saw you fight Drake and how inhumanly strong he was. You need to regain your memory first.”
When his face sets in stubborn lines, I cross my arms, refusing to back down. “Speaking of memories, why don’t you try to remember Danielle? You know, your supposed cousin you spent the last few weeks with.”
Lines crease around his mouth as he shakes his head. “Bits about you are coming back, but nothing about anything or anyone else.”
“If your memory doesn’t return, this Danielle person might be the only one who can fill in the blanks.” I square my shoulders, my tone hardening. “I might not like all the answers I get, but at least we’ll have them.”
Ethan pulls his hands out of his jacket and takes a step toward me. “Nara—”
The sound of the garage door opening draws our attention. I pick up the books from the coffee table, then hand him the journal. “Mom’s home. Flip through the journal tonight so you can catch up on all things raven. I have one more thing I want to show you tomorrow after school that also might help jog your memory.”
Ethan reaches for the leather book, but clasps his fingers around mine, holding me captive. “Tell me you believe we were meant to be, Nara. That more than this…” He glances from Freddie’s book in my other hand to the journal between our fingers. “Is keeping us together.”
My heart races as I stare into his eyes. I’m not ready to answer the emotional part, so I answer the best way I can. “Fate told me that everyone has a fate, and he’s the one who keeps us heading toward our destination. We’re on the same path, Ethan.”
Worry flickers in his eyes, making my heart ache. “He said he can’t see my fate. Are we on the same path?”
“But he said you have a destiny and so do I. All we can do is keep moving forward.”
Frustration reflects in his gaze and his mouth thins to a grim line. “So, together ’til?”
I nod just as Mom walks in and calls from the kitchen doorway. “Oh, hi, Ethan! I’m so glad to see you’re okay.” After she sets the groceries on the counter, she strolls into the living room smiling. “Inara was so worried.”
Ethan’s blue eyes flash to me, a slow smile tilting his lips. “She was worried about me?”
Thanks, Mom. How will I keep him at a distance with you saying things like that? Mom nods, oblivious to the look I’ve shot her way. “Of course she was. You should’ve seen her—”
“I’ve got to take Ethan home, Mom.”
Ethan’s smile broadens as he turns toward the front door. “That’s okay. I’ll walk, but I hope you don’t mind being my ride to school, at least until I get my car back from the shop. What do you say? Will you be my wheels, Nara?” he asks, eyebrows raised innocently.
I narrow my gaze. I’m just about to tell him that the couple miles to school is not a big deal to walk when Mom pipes in, “Of course she’ll be happy to give you a ride.”
Ethan flashes a brilliant smile. “Thanks, Nara. I’ll see you tomorrow morning.”
I follow him to the front door and as he walks out, I say, “I can take you in the morning, but you’ll have to find a ride home. I just remembered that Drystan reminded me we have indoor practice after school.”
He turns to me, all amusement gone. “I thought we had that thing after school tomorrow.”
I’m too irritated at how easily he’s twisted my emotions into knots to think about taking him to the raven sanctuary right now. I shrug. “It can wait a day. I’m sure you have a ton of homework to catch up on anyway. My guess is it’ll feel like a whole month’s worth.”
“Nara…” he begins.
; I plaster on a smile. “I’ll pick you up at seven forty-five tomorrow. Be ready bright and early.”
Chapter Ten
Nara
“Lainey!” I quickly wave to my friend over the crowd of students milling about in the locker hall.
She pushes off Matt’s locker, kisses him on the cheek, then heads in my direction.
I’ve just spun my combination lock when she reaches my side and immediately spouts in my ear above the end of the day noise. “Why did I have to find out from Drystan that Ethan’s lost his memory?” Folding her arms, she leans against the locker next to mine. “I shouldn’t have to remind you of the best friend ‘no secrets’ code.”
I’m stunned into silence and for a couple seconds I imagine wringing Drystan’s neck. How did he tell her without revealing why I told him about Ethan? The fact she chose to yell at me about this issue means he didn’t share the real reason I told him. If she knew the truth about either Drystan or my abilities, she’d really flip. Lainey can only handle certain truths and my ability to dream my next day—well, my past ability—isn’t one of them. “Sorry, Lainey. I only told Drystan because I thought he might have ideas of other places a guy might keep his phone that I hadn’t thought of.”
Her bottom lip pokes out. “Still, you should’ve told me. Poor Ethan.” Pausing, she glances around. “Where is he anyway? Isn’t he back at school? I thought I saw him in the hall earlier today.”
I nod. “He’s here. I was his ride to school since his car’s in the body shop. He’s probably busy trying to catch up with teachers, homework, and stuff.”
Lainey nods, her long red hair falling into her eyes. Pushing strands behind her ear, she says, “So catch me up. Drystan was stingy on the details.”
“Important things first. I ran into Harper yesterday afternoon on the school grounds.”
Destiny, YA Paranormal Romance (Brightest Kind of Darkness Series, Book #3) Page 9