Sure enough, the team coach pulls Ethan out, but when Ethan just shrugs and walks straight out the door instead of sitting on the bench, I throw my hands up. “Ugh, guys!”
The scrimmage ends ten minutes later. Everyone probably had homework or dinner to get to, because Lainey, Drystan, and I are the last ones to leave. I’m so beat, I don’t say much while I stuff my soccer gear into my bag. Drystan and Lainey follow behind me as I push the gym doors open and walk out into the crisp night air.
“At least it quit snowing,” Drystan says, glancing up at the clear sky.
I pause when I see Ethan leaning against my car. I hadn’t expected him to wait for me. I look for his car but don’t see it. Did he walk here?
Lainey sees my hesitation, then notices Ethan and quickly hooks her arm through Drystan’s. “I’m giving you a ride home. I want to hear all about this new parkour class you’ve started up before you get home and fill my boyfriend’s head with bone-breaking ideas.”
As she steers Drystan toward her car, I mouth, “Thanks,” to her, then call out, “Night, you two. See you tomorrow at school.”
Once Lainey and Drystan drive off, my heart starts thumping. Ethan’s expression is hidden in the shadows. I’m not sure what to say, so I delay saying anything and instead beep my car. When Ethan doesn’t move to let me open my door, my heart starts to race even more.
“I don’t like what’s happening between us.”
His words hurt because they echo my own thoughts. He’s feeling the distance too.
Since I can’t see his face and mine is bathed in the glow of a nearby building’s neon sign, putting my emotions on full display, I shift my attention to the hood of my car. “You said you needed to train, so I’m giving you that time.”
He steps close and speaks in a low rumble. “By spending it with the one guy who wants to replace me in your life?”
My gaze jerks to his. “Drystan is just a friend. At least I’ve taken the time to introduce him to you. I still haven’t met the girl who answered my boyfriend’s phone and told me he was in the shower…at ten at night!”
Ethan pales a little. “Danielle answered my phone?”
“We’ve already had this conversation, but apparently you haven’t remembered that part yet. By the way, that came before the ‘closet scene,’ where you told me she was your cousin’.” I don’t care if I sound snarky. My nerves are coiled so tight I can’t help it. Sighing, I step around him to beep my car again. “It’s been a long day. I need to go.” As I start to pull open my door, Ethan’s hands land on the doorframe and he pushes it shut.
“This memory thing would go a lot faster if you’d stop holding back on me. I sense you’re not telling me everything.”
I tense at the frustration in his voice, and Ethan leans close, his hips pressing against my butt. “I’m sorry, Nara. Please, don’t go.” My gym bag drops to the ground as his muscular warmth cocoons my back. “It feels like you’re leaving me, and I can’t bear the thought. It might be slowing me down, but I’m doing everything I can to remember.”
I don’t want to be the reason Ethan gets hurt. Guilt makes my hands shake, so I press them to the car’s window to hold them steady and bow my head. “This is just so hard. I’m trying to be understanding.”
Ethan’s warm hands cover mine, and he whispers in my ear, “It drives me nuts to see you with another guy, even if it’s just something as simple as riding together to play soccer. I know exactly what he’s thinking. I know, because I can’t help but want you more when I see you all sweaty and running your heart out.” He pauses to press his lips to my throat, murmuring, “Mmmm, salty and sweet.”
Tilting my head, I give him access to my neck. I absorb the feel of his hard frame behind me, holding me up and supporting me, even for a few seconds. This isn’t full on intimacy. At least I tell myself that as my body yields to his.
“I miss touching you so much.” His lips slide up my throat and his fingers fold tight around mine, locking our left hands against the cold glass. I swallow hard, my heart hammering when his other hand falls to my hip to press me closer.
Running hard has intensified Ethan’s appealing smell. Or maybe it’s hearing him say how much it bothers him to see me with someone else that amps my attraction. All I know is…I don’t notice the cold air or the thin layer of snow beneath our feet. His heat and intensity seduce me, making me want him so much my insides quiver and my nerves tingle with excitement.
I press my free hand to his jaw, enjoying the feel of his five o’clock shadow against my fingers. Ethan whispers my name and slides his hand up my shirt. My muscles flex as his fingertips trace slowly along my belly until they come to rest over my thrumming heart, and his thumb slides under my bra clasp. Skin to skin. Warmth melding into warmth. “My heart,” he rasps before kissing my jaw and pressing his fingers closer, locking me against him.
The pressure intensifies each beat of my heart, making me feel it flow from the front of my chest to my back. But it’s not my heart I feel against my back. As Ethan’s lips trail along my cheek, I count the beats. Ethan’s heart is pounding just as hard as mine. I know it’s my imagination, but it almost feels like they’re in sync. My heart beats a little faster at the thought.
Ethan’s hold tightens on me and just before his lips capture mine, I realize I let this get too far. Why can’t I keep my wits whenever he touches me? Gripping his hand, I pull it away from my heart and say in a breathy voice, “What have you learned about our connection when you talked to Danielle?”
He takes a deep breath and shakes his head as if clearing it. “Connection?”
I stare straight ahead and try to calm my racing heart. “Yes, the ravens. You’ve told Danielle about our connection, right?”
When he stills behind me, I realize he hasn’t shared anything about us with the girl. Turning to face him, I hold his gaze. “I think you should tell her about our dreams and our connection through ravens. She might have some insight.”
“Answers are really all you want from me?”
He looks so incredulous, I lift my hand to touch his arm. “No, I didn’t mean it like that.” Danielle needs to know what you and I have is beyond special; it’s a deep, emotional connection. And if she has some knowledge to share that can help us learn more, then great. But how can I say that without sounding insecure? Before I can say anything, he steps back.
“Then you’ll get your wish.” His voice sounds flat, his expression shutting down. “See you tomorrow.”
“Ethan wait, I—”
But he takes off running and is quickly swallowed by the night.
Chapter Fourteen
Nara
You know that roiling, anticipatory feeling you get in the pit of your stomach? That’s how mine feels as I stand in the atrium at the front of the school, hanging with Lainey, Matt, and Drystan this morning.
My dreams used to tell me everything that would happen. Now they’re nothing but a strange mishmash of worries, fears, and hopes in moving imagery each night.
Last night I dreamed I was running around the frozen woods again, looking for Ethan. I’d call his name and every so often I’d hear him respond, saying, “I’m here.” Once I reached the area where I heard his voice, Danielle would pop out from behind the tree, laughing.
From the moment I woke up, my stomach’s been wound tight. I’m not sure what I’m feeling, just that my gut’s telling me something’s in the air. Maybe intuitiveness never goes away; it just adapts to its new environment.
I arrived early, hoping that chatting with my friends would help take my mind off Ethan. I’d been so spoiled when he had that phone. It would’ve been easy to send a message, saying, “You took what I said the wrong way. That’s not what I meant at all.” Then again, Ethan’s personality is so strong, it’s better to have a conversation like that in person, which I plan to do as soon as I can get him alone.
A sudden hush rushes over the crowded atrium. Even Drystan, Lainey, and Matt seem spell
bound by something at the front of the school. I glance toward the entrance to see what has caught everyone’s attention.
Ethan and Danielle are chatting just inside the door. The breathtaking sight of them, like the same half of an alluring, dark-hued coin, slams my chest as if someone has just clotheslined me.
Standing a few inches shorter than Ethan, Danielle’s dressed in all black: fitted jeans, moto boots, and a side-zip leather jacket. Ethan’s wearing a black sweater and dark jeans over his boots. While Danielle’s hair flows in black silky waves down her back, Ethan’s is a mess of spiked sloppiness that opens his face and enhances his chiseled bone structure. They both exude seductive confidence as they pause and scan the crowd.
Had they finally noticed the effect they were having? All I can think is…they look like they belong together. Apparently the crowd shares my thoughts, because several people cast sympathetic gazes my way.
A couple girls stroll past, blocking my line of sight to the front of the school. The dark-haired one glances my way over her shoulder, saying, “Looks like you’ve been traded up, Nara. Ah well, better luck with the next guy.”
I glare at Miranda—the captain of our soccer team—as she turns to Sophia and laughs at her own wittiness. Once they walk off snickering, and the people in the atrium start to buzz and move around the crowded area once more, a warm hand squeezes my shoulder.
“Damn, you weren’t kidding about those two, were you?” Drystan whispers in my ear. “If you want, I’ll invite them to my parkour class and throw in a self-defense lesson right up front so you can use them as volunteer dummies.” The idea of knocking the wind out of them under the guise of self-defense is so appealing I can’t help but laugh.
“Nara.” Ethan’s deep voice floats my way. His gaze immediately snaps to Drystan’s hand on my shoulder and his jaw tightens. As Drystan’s fingers slip away, I let out an inward sigh of relief and start to respond when Drystan moves closer, his chest brushing against the back of my right shoulder.
“You going to introduce your new friend, Ethan?” he says, laying on his Welsh accent.
Danielle stands beside Ethan, all tall, curvy, and gorgeous, eyeing us with avid curiosity. Her gaze quickly sweeps over Drystan’s proximity to me, then a perfectly plucked eyebrow raises in knowing amusement.
Ethan ignores Drystan and steps forward to grip my hand. Pulling me toward him, he turns to Danielle. “Danielle, this is my girlfriend, Nara.”
Danielle swings a contemplative gaze away from Drystan, and I shiver as her dark eyes lock on to me. She’s beautiful and coolly unreachable, yet at the same time magnetic. She might be smiling, but her eyes are so dark it’s hard to read her.
“Nice to meet you, Nara.” Sweeping her attention to Lainey, Matt, and Drystan, her smile broadens. “And what are your names? Any friends of Ethan’s are friends of mine.”
“These are my friends…” I begin, but pause when Ethan tucks me by his side and slides his hand deep into my jeans’ back pocket.
“Go on, Nara. Introduce them,” he says in a light tone even as his deep blue eyes challenge me to balk.
Apparently I’d flipped his patience switch last night and he was done giving me my space. He’s never been so openly possessive before. While a part of me feels relief that he’s making it clear to Danielle we’re a couple, another part of me wonders how much of this move is for Drystan’s sake. Nothing in Ethan’s expression tells me that he’d learned anything from Danielle about us.
But he did tell her. I can tell by the way Danielle’s sizing me up as I lift my hand toward Lainey and continue, “This is my friend Lainey, her boyfriend Matt, and Drystan, who’s here from Wales and living with Matt and his family.”
While Danielle nods to them and Matt asks her questions about being new to Blue Ridge, I speak to Ethan in a low tone as I start to slide out of his hold. “You took what I said yesterday the wrong way.”
His hand curves in my pocket, cupping my butt and locking me against him. “I don’t think I did, but if you want we can talk about it at your house after school.”
My heart thumps at the idea, but being alone with him isn’t the smartest move right now, especially after yesterday. I can barely think with him touching me. Drystan’s “doormat” reminder bolsters my resolve to keep things as uncomplicated as possible between Ethan and me right now. “Did you learn anything about us from Danielle?”
“Just that our connection surprised her. She’s never heard of Corvus having the kind of relationship we do.” A cocky smile flashes. “Told you, Sunshine.”
“How does she know so much about Corvus?” I ask as Danielle weaves her charisma around Matt, Lainey and Drystan like a spider’s sticky web.
“She was trained.”
“By whom?”
“Her adoptive father.”
My eyebrows shoot up as my friends listen intently to Danielle talk about working on a NASCAR pit crew for six months. At least Matt now knows where she learned about cars. I glance at Ethan, who’s watching her too, which makes me grind my teeth. “What is she?”
His mouth presses into a thin line and he nods to Drystan. “What is he?”
Stalemate. This sucks. I sigh and shake my head. “You can’t come over later, I have to stop by CVAS to take pictures of the pets who’ve been there the longest. After Sally saw my pictures of Houdini, she asked me to take ones of the other older dogs romping in the yard for the website. I’ve got soccer after that. Coach wants us there early for our game. What about later?”
The first bell rings, indicating we have five minutes to get to first class, and as our friends start to leave, we follow behind at a slower pace, entering a side hall that leads to the lockers. “I can’t meet later,” Ethan says. “We’re training ’til late.”
I frown. “How late?”
“Not sure yet. Danielle was able to learn information from some guys here at school about Harper. They mentioned places they saw her hanging out recently…some dive bar and a couple clubs. We plan to check the bar out tonight. We’ll keep looking until we find her.”
I shake my head. “I don’t think you should go looking for a demon while your memory is faulty and your training is rusty. That’s just crazy.”
Confident arrogance tilts his lips. “The Corvus instinct is very strong. I know how to call my sword now. It’s getting easier and faster each time I practice. If the demon’s still inside her, we’ll find out why she wanted that book, and since the book is tied to you, we might learn more about how you and I are connected. That’s what you wanted, answers.”
“Not like this, Ethan. Wait until your memory returns, then all that training you’ve had will come back to you.”
His face hardens. “If this helps my memory to return faster, I’m all for it.”
“Why are you being so stubborn?”
“Because you are.” Frustration stamps the hard lines around his mouth, but it’s the vulnerability banked in his gaze that holds me in place as he reaches for my hand. “Even though I’m the one with the memory loss…” He swipes his thumb across my palm in a slow, leisurely caress. “Why does it feel like I’m the only one fighting for us?”
“Ethan…” That really hurt—a deep in my chest kind of pain. As I close my eyes to hold back the emotions, his finger moves higher, brushing the edge of my scar, and my legs nearly buckle. Instead of the dull pain whenever anything comes into contact with the raised line of skin, a jolt of pleasure shoots down my body.
I swallow my gasp, but can’t help the shiver that runs through me as he steps so close I feel his breath stirring my hair. I don’t move away. I can’t. I inhale deeply, calming my reaction before I open my eyes. “I’m worried for you. Last night I dreamed I was looking for you in the woods. It’s a dream I’ve had several times, but in this dream every time I run toward your voice calling me, Danielle would pop out from behind a tree and laugh, like it was some kind of twisted game.”
His lips bend in a smug smile. “You sure you�
�re not just jealous?”
“I’m serious.” I grip his hand. “My dream might’ve been weird, but I woke up anxious and tense.”
“I don’t want you to worry.” Pressing his lips to my temple, he says huskily, “I just want you to love me.”
I never stopped loving you, I want to scream, but I’m so afraid he’ll break my heart when his full memory returns. As his thumb starts to slide across my palm once more, I look down at our clasped hands and notice he’s not wearing his silver ring anymore. I take a step back, untangling our fingers. “Where’s your ring?”
He flexes his hand. “I had to take it off during training. I can’t grip the sword right with it on.”
I nod my understanding, even though not seeing the ring on his finger makes me sad. I lift my gaze to his. “Ethan, it’s because I care that I’m worried. Why can’t you see that?”
“All I see is you pulling away.” Irritation flashes in his gaze as it snaps between our separated hands.
“That’s not fair. You know I’m here for you.”
Glancing around the cleared hall, he expels a resigned sigh. “I’ll be fine, Nara. We need to get to class. I’ll let you know when I have answers.”
Nara
My phone rings as I drive past Ethan’s house.
“Hello?”
“Inara, sweetie. What have you been up to?”
“Hey, Gran.” I make a U-turn at the end of the street and then park in the darkest area I can find that’ll still give me a good view. Not much. Just stalking my boyfriend’s house at eleven at night. “I’m just getting back from hanging with my friend Lainey after our soccer game. What are you doing up so late? Aren’t you usually in bed by nine?”
My great-aunt Corda—who I’ve called Gran since I was little—sniffs into the phone. “I can’t sleep. I’m worried about Clara. She might drive me crazy at times, but she’s like a buckshot of morphine right to my taillight; she keeps me hopping.”
Destiny, YA Paranormal Romance (Brightest Kind of Darkness Series, Book #3) Page 15