by Ginny Dye
Carrie gazed into his eyes for a long moment. Satisfied with what she saw there, a brilliant smile exploded on her face. “Then I suggest you start by kissing your wife,” she commanded joyfully.
Long moments later, Robert held her back and stared into her green eyes. “I don’t know how I ended up the luckiest man in the world, but I will never again let you down.”
Carrie shook her head. “We can’t promise each other that because we don’t know what the future will hold. I may be the one to let you down, or life may throw something so terrible at us that we both will want to give up.” She took a deep breath. “I think the most we can reasonably commit to is that we will never walk away from the other, no matter how dark it gets. I made you that promise when we married, Robert. I’m making it again.”
Robert smiled, his eyes shining with moisture as he clasped her hands. “And I make the same promise to you,” he murmured. “I intend to spend the rest of my life letting you know how much I love you.”
“Then I will be the happiest woman in the world,” Carrie breathed as she crawled onto the bed beside him and settled back against his chest, her head resting on his shoulder.
They spent the next hours talking. Carrie held nothing back, believing Robert could handle it. She told him about his mother and aunt, comforting him when he cried. She told him about Janie’s leaving with Clifford and all the fears she had for her friend.
“You’ve heard nothing from her at all?” Robert asked sharply. “And you’re afraid Clifford will hurt her?”
Carrie took a deep breath and nodded. “He was not the same man when he left here.”
Robert shook his head. “The war may be over, but the ramifications will continue for a long time,” he said quietly.
“I know,” Carrie agreed. She told him of seeing all the veterans on the road when they had come out to the plantation. “I have to find a way to help them,” she said softly. “I’m not sure how…”
“I know you’ll find a way,” Robert said confidently.
Carrie glanced up and then burrowed her head into his shoulder, finally letting the tears come. “I have missed you so much,” she whispered. “So very much…”
Robert held her tightly, stroking her hair and letting her cry until the tears had run their course. “How about if we watch Granite in the pasture for a minute?”
Carrie stiffened. “Watch Granite in the pasture? How…?”
Robert moved her over and slowly swung his legs over the edge of the bed. “I believe the proper term for it is walking,” he teased, his face tight with concentration as he rose to stand upright.
Carrie held her breath and watched as he stood and slowly walked to the window. She was at his side in a flash, breathing in the warm air as it flowed over them. “There is a storm coming,” she said, joy exploding through every fiber of her being that she was actually standing next to the man she loved.
“I would say we could go outside on the porch to watch it, but I’m afraid it will take a few days to get my strength back,” Robert said regretfully.
“How about if you had help?” Carrie asked. “I just saw Father and Moses return from the fields. I know they could get you down easily.”
“Moses,” Robert murmured. He turned Carrie’s head to meet his eyes. “I’m supposed to be keeping a secret, but I have so many questions exploding in my head.”
“Amber told you about Moses saving you at Antietam,” Carrie guessed. “I shouldn’t have asked an eight-year-old little girl to keep such a big secret.”
Robert frowned. “Why is it such a big secret? Amber said she overheard you saying that there was more to know, but she didn’t know what it was.”
Carrie nodded and took a deep breath. “It’s not my story to tell, Robert. How about if you get some rest, and I’ll send Moses up after dinner?”
“Not even a hint?”
“Not even a hint,” Carrie said firmly.
******
Moses stood at the bottom of the stairs, forcing himself to breathe evenly. He knew this day would come. He had also accepted that no matter when it actually came, he would probably not feel ready for it. Unfortunately, he had been right.
Rose slipped beside him and wrapped her arm around his waist. “Just speak from your heart,” she said gently. “You’ll find the right words.”
Moses gazed at her, wishing he had the same confidence. Finally he nodded, squared his shoulders, and walked up the stairs.
Robert was sitting in a chair by the window when he entered the room. Moses understood he didn’t want the vulnerability of being in bed when they talked. “Hello, Robert.”
Robert smiled, his brow creased with curiosity. “Hello, Moses. I understand there are things we need to talk about. Why don’t you pull up another chair?”
Moses nodded, glad to have something to do to delay the conversation even for a moment. He had played this over in his head at least a thousand times, but no scenario ever felt right. He carried the chair over to the window and sat down, gazing out at Granite grazing in the pasture.
“You’ve definitely got my curiosity aroused,” Robert finally said.
Moses nodded again, but still he was silent as he searched for a way to begin.
“While you figure out how to say what you obviously have no idea how to say, I want to tell you thank you for saving my life at Antietam,” Robert said quietly. “I’m surprised you saved me,” he added.
Moses looked up then, seeing an opening. “Me too,” he said bluntly, “but I’m glad I did.”
“Why did you? I’m pretty sure you knew how I felt about slaves and black people at that point in my life.”
“I did it for Carrie,” Moses said softly. “What I thought about you was irrelevant. Carrie loved you. I couldn’t have lived with myself if I hadn’t tried to save both you and Granite.”
“Especially Granite,” Robert said wryly. “I guess I should be glad you took me along for the ride.”
Moses laughed then, realizing that no matter what the outcome of the conversation, right now it was just two men talking. “It’s time to get this all out,” he stated firmly. “Secrets always have a way of coming out when you least want them to.”
“Secrets?”
Moses nodded and took a deep breath. “I’ve imagined this conversation so many times, but I’ve never figured out a good way to tell you that it was my daddy that killed your daddy.”
Once he had said the words they seemed to just hang in the air, supported by the breeze and the dust motes dancing in the sun.
Robert stiffened and sucked in his breath. “What?” He hardly recognized his own voice. “What are you talking about?”
“I was eleven years old when my daddy tried to escape the plantation we were on. He got caught, along with a lot of others. They decided my daddy was one of the leaders and decided to make an example of him by hanging him.” Moses paused, trying to keep his voice calm as the memories threatened to swallow him. “I overheard some men talking on the porch of my plantation so I knew what they were going to do. I didn’t want my daddy to die alone so I snuck out into the woods to watch.” His voice thickened as telling the story took him back in time.
He could feel the blackberry brush stabbing him as it pulled him into its embrace to hide him. He could see the flames roaring from the bonfire. He could hear the angry shouts of men. He could see the broken body of his daddy being prodded into the clearing with pitchforks.
Robert waited quietly, watching him closely.
“They had broken both of my daddy’s arms. They didn’t think he could do anything, so they untied his hands before they took him to the platform where the noose was.” Moses faltered as vivid images flashed through his mind.
He could see his daddy’s lips tighten. He saw the determined look that said his daddy was going to do something important. He could see the knife waving in the firelight as Master Borden threatened to cut him up before they hung him.
“It was my father who
was going to cut him before they hung him,” Robert said heavily, regret mixed with a lingering anger from what he had witnessed so many years before. He thought he had released all the anger, but the vivid images pouring into his mind had his heart and gut tightening like a vise.
Moses gasped. Had he said his thoughts out loud? “How could you…?
“I was there too,” Robert said flatly.
Moses could only stare at him.
“I saw the whole thing. I overheard some of the men talking and decided to do the same thing you did. I followed them and hid away in the woods.”
“So you saw…?”
Robert nodded grimly. “I saw your daddy lunge off that platform and kill my father.”
Moses stiffened with anger but didn’t have time to get a word out.
“I also saw my father threaten to cut him with the knife,” Robert added in a voice full of regret. “I know your father did the only thing he could do. I also know I would have done the same thing if the roles had been reversed,” he added firmly. Saying those words — knowing the truth of them — released the last vestiges of anger and filled him with peace.
Moses sat back in his chair and gazed at Robert while a stiff breeze suddenly blew through the room. “Both of us lost something precious that night,” he finally said softly. He felt peace flow through him as the wind swept over his hot face.
“Yes. And it also set both of us on a course we didn’t have a lot of control over,” Robert said. “Both of us hated because of things other people did. We hated because we were taught to hate.” He took a deep breath. “Moses, you had more reason to hate than I did.”
Moses nodded slowly. “Yes, I suppose you’re right, but that doesn’t diminish the pain of a boy watching his father be murdered.”
“For either of us,” Robert said simply. A long silence fell over the room. “You knew all this when you saved me,” he said slowly.
“Yes.”
“And you knew I killed the little boy on my plantation the year before the war started.”
Moses tightened, forcing the image out of his mind as soon as it sprang up because he knew Robert was a different man. “Yes.”
“And still you saved me,” Robert said in wonder. “You took me to a black family that totally changed my life.” He reached out a hand and gripped Moses’s arm tightly. “Thank you,” he whispered, tears springing to his eyes.
“You’re welcome,” Moses said, shaking his head. “I’ve imagined this moment a lot of times. I never thought it would be like this.”
Robert smiled. “There has been enough hatred and violence for a lifetime. It still amazes me that God has forgiven me for all the things I have done. How can I not forgive others? Especially a man who tried to escape a horrible situation and got caught?” He held Moses’s gaze. “The truth is that my father would have done terrible things to him if your father hadn’t killed him. It was a horrible thing, but I determined a couple years ago that I was no longer going to let the past define me.”
The sound of laughter drifted up through the window. It caught on the breeze and swirled through the room in a dance.
Robert smiled again. “This is what matters now. Today. Laughter. Friends. Family. I think only God could have reunited two boys who watched something so terrible. Only God could have brought you here to Cromwell Plantation and intersected our paths in Antietam. You’re an amazing man, Moses. Thank you for all you’ve done for Carrie.”
Moses smiled, the smile coming easily now. “You’re welcome,” he replied. “And I do believe you’re right about only God being able to turn all this around,” he murmured, his heart light now that the secret was out in the open.
Robert heard a sound in the distance and turned to look out the window. The sun had set, but the day was still bright. He saw a cloud of dust in the distance and a large mass that seemed to be moving. “What in the world?” he muttered.
Moses turned to look out the window too, straining his eyes to determine what was coming. “Your guess is as good as mine,” he finally said. “Whatever it is, it seems to be big.”
“Were we expecting anyone today?” Robert asked, his eyes on the road.
Moses shook his head. “Not that I know of.” He was suddenly anxious to go downstairs and see what was going on. Carrie and Rose had just stepped out on the porch. Their faces said they weren’t expecting anyone either. “I think I’ll go down.”
“Will you help me?” Robert asked suddenly. “I can walk again, but I’m afraid I’m rather weak.”
Moses grinned, knowing how happy Carrie would be when Robert walked out on the porch. “Certainly.” He wrapped one arm around Robert’s waist, stunned at how frail he was.
Robert interpreted the look on his face. “I know it’s bad,” he admitted, “but I’ll get strong again quickly.”
Moses nodded. “Just be warned that my mama will be pouring food into you every chance she gets.”
“Your mama?” Robert knew Moses had gone to get his mother and sister, but Carrie hadn’t told him anymore.
“Her name is Annie. She is cooking now that Opal is gone.”
Robert’s eyes were sad. “My father killed her husband,” he finally said. “Can she forgive me?”
“She already has,” Moses said quickly. “Like you said, there has been enough hatred and violence. The country is starting over and so are all of us. None of us need to carry the baggage of the past with us. There are plenty of people in this country determined to do just that. We don’t need to add to their numbers. There will be enough trouble as it is.”
Robert nodded and leaned into Moses when they reached the stairs.
“Just take them slow,” Moses said. “You don’t need to worry about falling.”
Robert smiled. “I believe you,” he said, his legs trembling from the exertion of walking. He paused. “I’d like it if we could be friends, Moses. In addition to all the personal connections, I understand Thomas has made you half-owner of Cromwell Plantation.”
Moses shot a look at him as they slowly descended the stairs. “Does that bother you?”
“Not a bit. I can’t think of many things I would rather not do than run a tobacco plantation,” he said ruefully. “My passion has been and always will be horses.”
“We’ll be friends,” Moses said firmly as they reached the bottom of the stairs. He could feel the trembling in Robert’s body. “Want to take a break?”
“Yes,” Robert responded with a smile, “but I would prefer it to in be the rocking chair out on the porch.”
Moses chuckled and walked with him across the parlor.
******
“Robert!” Carrie cried. “You’re downstairs!” Her eyes were wide with wonder. “How…?”
“Moses helped me. We had a very good talk.” Robert looked down the road. “Does anyone know who is coming?”
“No idea,” Carrie murmured, her eyes shining with joy as she exchanged a glance with Moses and then stepped close to her husband. She wrapped her arm around his waist and gently lowered him into the rocker.
“It’s so good to see you downstairs,” Rose said, handing him a glass of lemonade and a plate of cookies. “Annie is determined to make all of us heavy. I’m so glad you’re here to share these.”
Robert smiled. “Thank you, Rose.” He took a deep breath. “You have a rather remarkable husband,” he said.
“That I do,” Rose responded easily. “I’m so glad you’re feeling stronger. Clint will be very excited to see you out of bed.”
Robert smiled. “Where is he?”
“Out in the barn I’m sure. He has oiled Granite’s tack so many times it’s probably about to wear out!” Carrie said with a grin. “He’s ridden Granite a few times. I’ve never seen such joy on anyone’s face.”
“He loves that horse,” Robert murmured. “And he has a gift.”
“He’s determined the two of you are going to work with horses together,” Carrie responded. “Now all we have to do is ge
t some horses,” she continued with a chuckle. “I told him it would be a while.”
Just then Thomas and Abby joined them on the porch.
“Hello, Father. Look who decided to join us.”
Thomas smiled and stepped forward to shake Robert’s hand warmly. “Welcome back to the land of the living, my boy!”
Robert winced. “You and I both know it’s about time.”
“I know it’s easy to judge something you’ve never experienced,” Thomas said evenly. “I’m simply glad you’re doing better. And just in time.”
“Just in time?” Robert asked. “What do you mean?”
Thomas nodded his head toward the dark mass that was drawing closer. It had gotten just dark enough to be unable to determine what it was.
“Do you know who is coming?” Carrie demanded.
Thomas just shrugged, a mysterious smile on his lips.
“Abby?” Carrie demanded. She looked more closely and realized Abby’s eyes were shining with excitement. “Who is coming?”
“You’re about to find out,” Abby murmured as she moved close to the edge of the porch. She turned to Robert and bent down to give him a warm kiss on the forehead. “Welcome back,” she whispered. “I’d say the timing is perfect.”
Rose suddenly leaned forward and peered hard. “There are horses coming!” she cried.
Carrie stepped up beside her. “Horses?”
Suddenly Clint bolted from the barn and waved wildly at the house. “They’re here, Aunt Abby! They’re here!”
Abby smiled broadly and waved back. “I see that,” she called joyfully. “Are you ready for them?”
Clint ran all the way from the barn and skidded to a stop at the bottom of the stairs, his eyes gleaming. “Yes, ma’am! Every stall is cleaned and ready. I’ve got feed and hay in all of them, and everyone has fresh water.”
“And I thought you were just cleaning tack,” Carrie said in wonder, her eyes growing wider as the horses drew closer. “Look at them!” she cried. She whirled around to stare at Abby. “You did this?”