by E. L. Todd
I stopped focusing on the sensation of his fingers moving into an exit and just thought about his kiss and touch. My nipples hardened, and I slowly rocked along his length, feeling his cock get harder than ever before. Soon enough, I stopped thinking about it altogether and just fell into the moment.
He slowly pulled his fingers out of my ass then grabbed his cock by the base. He pressed his head into my loosened channel and slowly pressed inside.
His fingers were nothing in comparison to his cock.
I winced slightly when I felt him press against me. The stretching was extreme, and I gripped his shoulders in preparation.
He looked me in the eye. “Baby, just relax.” He kissed the corner of my mouth and slowly slid inside, fitting nearly the entire thing inside me. “You have no idea how good you feel right now...”
I dug my nails into his shoulders and held on tightly, trying to get acclimated to the most foreign experience of my life. I breathed deeply, nearly panting.
Zeke’s hands went to my ass, and he pulled my cheeks apart and began to move inside, every inch of his thick and massive dick sliding in and out. “After a few minutes, you’ll get used to it.” He kissed me again as he thrust his hips upward, ramming deep inside me before he pulled out. Sometimes a moan would escape his throat, innately sexy.
His left hand moved between my legs, and his thumb rubbed my clit aggressively, moving in a circular motion. He touched me the same way I touched myself, like he’d spied on me during the late hours of the night.
That’s when things started to get really good. He kissed me passionately while he rubbed my most sensitive area with his massive thumb. His large cock started to feel good, the nerve endings finally dwindling to a pleasurable level. Before long, I rocked back into him and took more of his cock at a harder pace.
“Fuck, you feel incredible.” He kissed my neck then nipped at my collarbone, his thumb and hips working at the same time.
I felt my pussy clench even though he wasn’t inside me. My hips started to buck from the unexpected orgasm, rocking my body hard and making me tighten and soften at the same time. I moaned against his mouth and felt his cock ram into me hard. “God...”
Zeke was about to come too. His expression smoldered like usual, and he gripped my hips forcefully as he prepared to fill me. He gave a few more strokes until he fully inserted himself and released, pumping his seed deep into my ass. “Fuck...yeah.” His arms locked around my waist and rested on the steep curve of my back. He slowly pulled out of me, my body wincing when he was gone. “You okay?”
“You heard me come, Zeke.”
He pulled me to his chest and rested his face in the crook of my neck. “Told you that you would enjoy it.”
“I think I only enjoyed it because of you.”
He kissed my neck before he pulled away and met my look. “I think I feel the same way.”
***
“Do we have to do this today?” I pulled on my sweatshirt and slipped on my shoes by the door.
“Why not today?” He grabbed his keys and wallet.
“You fucked me in the ass not too long ago. It’ll just be weird to talk to Rochelle now.”
“And if I fucked you in the pussy, you would feel differently?” he asked with that smartass smirk.
“It’s a lot dirtier, that’s for sure.”
“It doesn’t matter how I fuck you, baby. It’ll always be dirty.” He wrapped his arm around my waist then pulled me out the door and to the Jeep. Like always, he opened the door for me before he went around to the other side.
“Where does she live?” I asked.
“Only ten minutes away.”
“Does she have a house?”
“Yeah. Her parents gave it to her.”
The only thing my parents gave me was a brother to look out for me. “That’s cool.”
We pulled into the driveway then killed the engine. The lights were on in the house, so it seemed like she was home. We walked to the front door then rang the doorbell.
My heart was beating a million miles an hour.
“Don’t be nervous.”
“How can you not be nervous? We’re practically bombarding her.”
“If I’d called, she wouldn’t have picked up.”
“And you think she’s going to answer the door when she sees us through the peephole?”
He shrugged. “I don’t know. But I have to try.”
Since this was important to Zeke, I stopped complaining.
To my surprise, she did open the door. Rochelle looked at both of us like she couldn’t believe what her eyes were telling her. She was still in her scrubs like she just got off work. Her hair was in a bun, and she wasn’t wearing makeup. “What the hell are you doing here?”
I let Zeke do all the talking.
“We were hoping we could talk. Rae and I would like to clear up a few things.” Zeke was far less authoritative than he usually was. He allowed Rochelle to have the reins and determine where she wanted the conversation to go. “We understand if you don’t want to talk to us, but we hope you’ll give us a chance to explain ourselves. I just don’t want you to think I ever cheated on you. That means a lot to me.”
Rochelle kept her guard up but still looked pissed. “Why do you care?”
“Of course, I care,” Zeke said. “Rae does too.”
I’d never felt so out of place in my life. Rochelle hadn’t looked at me once.
Rochelle joined us on the porch and shut the door behind her. Even though it was dark and cold outside, she didn’t invite us inside, not that she was obligated to. We were practically enemies in her eyes. “Fine. What do you want to say?” She crossed her arms over her chest.
I could tell just by looking at her that she was still in love with Zeke. She hid her emotion, but I could see the distant film of moisture on her eyes. If she really didn’t care, she would have shut the door in our faces. When she looked at him, there was still that infatuation, that love.
God, I hated myself.
Zeke spoke first. “Rae and I got together a month after you and I broke up. I never cheated on you. Rae and I were only friends during that entire time. I don’t want you to think I was sneaking around behind your back. I did care about you and still do. I don’t want you to think I’d ever do that to you.”
She stared at the ground before she looked at him again. “You told me how you used to feel about her...”
“I know,” he said with a sigh. “I did feel that way about her.”
“So, did you feel that way while you were with me?” She spoke so quietly, it seemed like she didn’t want him to hear it and give her an answer.
Zeke was silent for almost a minute. “I think I’ve always felt this way about Rae. But when we were together, I didn’t actively think about her. When you and I made love, I wasn’t thinking about her. When we went out to dinner, I wasn’t thinking about her. I never thought about her. But...I think I’ve always felt this way about her.”
It was such a sweet thing to say, but it made me feel like the biggest jerk on the planet. I wished I weren’t there to listen to it.
Rochelle looked down again. “I really loved you...”
My heart was breaking.
“I loved you too,” Zeke said. “I really did.”
She sniffed and forced the tears back. “If you did, then why did you leave?”
Zeke sighed. “I loved you, Rochelle. If we’d stayed together, we would have been happy. I know I would have been happy. But...I loved Rae in a different way. I had to take the chance to be with her. I’m sorry I hurt you, but I had to do it.”
“So, you left me for her?”
He nodded. “I found out Rae had feelings for me. And when that happened...I couldn’t stop thinking about her. I broke things off between us and took some time to sort out my feelings. About a month later, I asked her out.”
Rochelle sniffed again, holding back tears.
“I’m sorry, Rochelle. I’m so sorry for hurt
ing you. I wish things had been different. But even if I didn’t go out with Rae, I still had to end things between us. Because...it wouldn’t have been right.”
Her bottom lip trembled. “I guess I never had a chance, did I?”
Zeke didn’t know what to say to that. He bowed his head.
“You didn’t cheat on me, but you never loved me as much as you loved her,” she whispered. “That’s what you came to tell me.”
“I just wanted you to know what really happened,” Zeke said. “That I didn’t betray you.”
“It hurts exactly the same, Zeke,” Rochelle said. “It doesn’t make a difference. You were the love of my life. You’ll always be the love of my life. I thought we were going to get married and...” She couldn’t finish.
I hated myself more than I ever had before. I wanted to burst into tears for all the pain I’d caused. If I’d never developed feelings for Zeke, none of this would have happened. But if I’d never been with Zeke, I never would have known true happiness.
Tears burned in his eyes. “I thought we would too. Believe me, I feel just as shitty as you do.”
“No, you don’t,” she snapped. “You don’t.”
Zeke stuffed his hands into the pockets of his jeans. “I guess...we should go.”
“I’m not sure why you brought her to begin with,” Rochelle hissed. “So, she could witness her victory?”
“No, not at all,” Zeke said calmly. “I just—”
I looked her in the eye. “Honestly, I hate myself for all the pain we’ve caused you. Neither one of us feels good about it. I thought of you as a friend, and when you two were together, I never made a move out of respect for both of you. I know you don’t agree, but Zeke is a great guy. This kills him inside. He wishes he could take it back. He wishes he could bear your pain so you don’t have to feel it. We just want you to know we don’t feel good about what happened. And we hope this gives you some closure.”
She finally relaxed, tears heavy in her eyes. “I’m sorry I called you a whore.”
I didn’t expect the apology.
“And threw a drink in your face,” she continued. “I know you’re a nice person. I know Zeke is too. I guess...being heartbroken has turned me into a bitter and mean person. I’m sorry for—”
“Don’t apologize,” I said quickly. “I understand. When Ryker dumped me, I was a wreck too. I know how it is to see the man you love walk away with a different woman. Believe me, I do.”
Instead of arguing, she nodded.
Zeke extended his arms to hug her.
She eyed his gesture before she finally reciprocated. She moved into his chest and closed her eyes, savoring the touch.
“Take care, alright?” He rubbed her back. “I know the right guy is out there waiting for you.”
She nodded and pulled away.
I didn’t move forward because I knew she wouldn’t want anything from me. But I did wave. “See you around.”
“Yeah,” she whispered. “See you around.” She walked inside and shut the door.
Once she was gone, Zeke took a deep breath like the weight was leaving his shoulders. He walked toward the Jeep with me beside him. With every step, he seemed to be stronger. The past gripped him less tightly.
And finally, the guilt left his body.
Chapter Seventeen
Rae
Jenny left early for the day because she had a doctor’s appointment, so the lab was empty. I turned on Spotify from my phone, so I had something to keep my mind busy while I finished my lab project. My bacteria had grown in perfect colonies, and now I was finally able to run some serious tests.
I was so excited about it I skipped lunch.
Sometimes, I forgot how much of a nerd I was. A perfect gram stain got me excited. Not the way Zeke got me excited, of course. But in a nerdy, professional kind of way.
The door at the top of the stairs opened, and heavy footfalls echoed down the stairs until they reached the lab. I’d just burned my inoculating loop over the burner and transferred a drop of my colony to a new petri dish, so I couldn’t turn around. “I’ll be with you in a second.”
The deep sound of his voice fell over my ears. “Take your time.”
I froze at my station for a millisecond before I kept going, knowing Ryker—my boss—was standing behind me. I finished what I was doing then disposed of my gloves before I washed my hands in the sink. As a scientist, it was difficult for me to ever step away from a procedure without giving my hands a good scrub.
I finally faced him, feeling light-headed. “Hey. What brings you down here to no-man’s-land?”
“My most talented scientist, of course.” He stood in his black suit, a handsome smile on his face and his hands in his pockets. Like our last encounter wasn’t tense as hell, he strolled inside with his head held high. “What are you working on?”
“Analyzing bacteria that could potentially break down certain kinds of waste.”
He nodded. “Sounds better than recycling.”
“Hopefully.” I crossed my arms over my chest and waited for him to say what he needed to say. It had to be work-related. Otherwise, he wouldn’t have come down there when Jenny could be around. “So...what can I help you with?” The last time we were together, he danced with me in the center of the room, one hand on my bare back and the other hand in mine. It was too intimate for me to forget about.
He stepped closer to me, far too close for a boss and an employee. “I was hoping you and I could have dinner after work.”
He wanted to have dinner?
He came down to ask me that?
“Ryker...why?”
“I’d like to talk to you about something. And I’d rather not do it here.”
Zeke told me Ryker wanted to get back together with me. I didn’t believe him, but now I was suspicious. “Are we going to pretend like nothing happened at that charity gala?”
He sighed like he wished I hadn’t brought it up. “Things got out of hand...I know.”
“Really out of hand.”
“Don’t act like it was all my fault. Zeke walked in there and started everything.”
“Don’t blame this on him.”
“I’m not,” he said quickly. “But I want you to know we’re both guilty, not just me.”
That was the most I was going to get out of him, so I let it be. “Then I don’t know what there is to talk about. I should get back to work.” I turned away to dismiss the conversation.
He grabbed me by the arm, his touch powerful and familiar. I was instantly taken back into time, when he would grab me like that all the time. “Rae.”
I turned back around and pulled my arm from his grasp. He let me go without a fight. “What?”
“Please.” Sincerity shone in his eyes, along with some desperation. “Just an hour of your time. One meal. That’s all.”
“I need more than that, Ryker. What is this about?”
“A lot of things,” he said quietly. “I know I don’t deserve your compassion after what I did to you. But...please.”
I’d never heard an admission of guilt from him. It was unlike him to admit he ever did anything wrong. Normally, he would just fight until he convinced me he was right. But now, he wasn’t bullshitting. In the back of my mind, I kept thinking about Zeke and how much this would piss him off. But when Ryker nearly begged me just to have a conversation, it was hard for me to resist. What if there was something serious going on, and he needed someone to be there for him? It was just dinner in a public place. It wasn’t like we were going to be alone together. And Rochelle did just throw a drink in my face and called me a whore. I didn’t give Zeke shit for that. “Okay.”
He smiled, but it wasn’t the sincere kind that reached his eyes. He suddenly looked miserable, like he felt guilty for pressuring me into something I didn’t really want to do. “We’ll go to Oliver’s. I’ll come down here at five.”
“Alright.”
He nodded then walked out of the lab, leaving me t
o think about what just happened.
***
The bathroom outside my lab was never used because it was downstairs. So, it pretty much belonged to Jenny and me exclusively. I called Jessie thirty minutes before my shift was over because it was the only chance I had. I was swamped in the lab without Jenny for help.
“Hey, girl. Are you still at work?”
I opened the stall and walked inside. “Yeah. I’m in the bathroom, so I had to use my cell. I really have to pee, and I haven’t had a chance all day.”
“They work you like mules, huh?” she said with a laugh.
“Something like that.” I got my jeans off. “Anyway, I have big news, and I need a pep talk before I call Zeke.”
“Oh my god. Are you pregnant?”
“No.” I pulled down my panties then placed a seat cover over the toilet. Then I sat down and did my business. “Ryker came into the lab and asked me to have dinner with him at Oliver’s.”
“Oh, shit.”
“He said he wanted to talk, but he didn’t say what it was about. At first, I said no, but he guilted me into it. I think something bad has happened. Maybe his mom is sick too or something...”
“Or he wants to get back together with you.”
“I don’t know... It didn’t seem like it.”
“Why?” she asked.
“He just seemed too...miserable. And I gave him shit for the way he acted with Zeke a few weeks ago. It’s pretty obvious I’m with Zeke, and there’s nothing he can say to come between us. So, I don’t think that’s it.”
“So, you’re going, then?”
“Yeah...”
“Are you gonna call Zeke when you get off the phone with me?”
“Yeah...” I was dreading the call.
“I’m sure if you explain the situation, Zeke will be okay with it. He’s a logical guy.”
“Yeah...” After all the shit that had happened with Ryker over the past few months, I wouldn’t be surprised if Zeke was ticked at first. He was certain Ryker was trying to steal me back. “I’ll let you know how it goes.”