“Of course you couldn’t let her stay with someone who’s ill,” Elisabeth agreed promptly. Although she and Arden were, regrettably, not as close as they’d once been, she’d heard about Hope’s first few days spent in a special incubator. She could only imagine how protective Arden must be of her child.
Noting the garment bag draped over Steven’s arm and the small duffel he carried with accessories for varying outfits, Arden pointed him toward the changing room. “You can put those in there. There are already hangers on the rod if you need them, so everything stays unwrinkled and camera-ready.”
“Can I hold the baby?” Kaylee asked, sticking both arms straight out in front of her.
Justin lowered his voice to a friendly, confidential tone, as if he were sharing an important secret. “I’d better hold on to her—I’ve almost got her to sleep. You wouldn’t believe what a pain she is when she doesn’t get her naps. I mean, she’s crankier than Chef Bates when someone rearranges any of the supplies in his walk-in pantry.”
Kaylee giggled, and Justin bent his legs so that he was closer to her height—albeit, not by much.
“Here,” he whispered. “This way you can get a better look at her. Just remember, no touching. And keep your voice soft like mine.”
“So she’ll fall asleep,” Kaylee agreed. “And not be a pain.”
Elisabeth couldn’t help creeping forward for a closer look of her own. The infant was tiny, bundled in a fuzzy blanket, her head covered in an adorable hat that looked like a polar bear face. Beneath the baby’s sleepy eyelids, Elisabeth glimpsed the same blue-green color of Justin’s eyes. She could pass for his daughter. It was a bittersweet thought, imagining him cradling a child of his own against his broad chest. He looked like such a natural with his niece, but Elisabeth knew he had no intentions of ever becoming a father.
Although he made jokes about being “the shallow Cade,” she suspected his aversion to building a family came from losing loved ones. Would he ever change? Would sufficient time pass for him to one day overcome his emotional baggage? Or would he perhaps meet a woman he cared for enough to face his fears?
Whether it happened or not, she wouldn’t be around to see it. She’d be in California, embracing her future. Grateful she’d met a man dependable enough to offer her that future, she flashed a warm smile over her shoulder at Steven, who was being pretty gracious about running into Elisabeth’s ex for the second time in two days. He’d confirmed after Kaylee went to bed last night that Elisabeth and Justin had once dated, but he hadn’t seemed threatened by it. And why should he be? It was Steven’s ring she was wearing. Justin was the distant past.
Although, he sure seemed to be popping up a lot in her present.
Elisabeth stepped forward to make introductions. “Arden, this is my fiancé, Steven Miller.” Behind her, Justin began humming to the baby. Elisabeth assumed it was a lullaby but a moment later, as she accepted Arden’s offer of coffee, she identified the tune as “Fly Like An Eagle.” She shot him an unamused glance, which he returned with a phony expression of boyish innocence.
Smart-ass. But she caught herself fighting a grin as she turned back around.
“Did you two have something particular in mind for your pictures?” Arden was asking. “I have standard backgrounds and props, and we can try lots of different poses then see what looks best in the proofs. But some couples bring in meaningful items or request settings uniquely personal to them.”
“We don’t have anything like that.” Elisabeth blurted her answer without thought. It was only after she’d spoken that she worried she’d made them sound like a dull couple. There were obviously moments and symbols of personal significance for them, she just couldn’t think of one off the top of her head. “Our main request is that you do a couple of shots that also include Kaylee. We’ll probably use one with just us as the official engagement photo, but we’re going to be a family. We wanted some portraits of all three of us.”
Arden nodded. “If you haven’t finished your Christmas shopping, a nice framed photo of the three of you could make a great gift for relatives.”
Typically, Elisabeth was done buying gifts by the end of November. This year—with Kaylee in her life—was a bit different, but there was already a neat stack of family presents in her closet waiting to be wrapped while she listened to her carol playlist or watched White Christmas. In light of Arden’s question about special mementos, Elisabeth was suddenly second-guessing her high-tech purchases for Steven, including a messenger bag charging station for all his electronic devices. Should she have picked out something with more emotional significance?
She’d never been particularly adept at the sappy stuff. Lacking her sister’s creative flair, Elisabeth’s forte was practicality. Back when she’d been dating Justin, she’d struggled with what to get him for his birthday. After two weeks of waffling between ski gear or a gift card, she’d given in to a silly whim and presented him with a book of erotic redeemable coupons. Not a groundbreaking gift in terms of originality, but he’d reacted with a wickedly appreciative smile. “Just what I always wanted. How’d you know?”
She wasn’t sure they’d made it through the whole book before he ended their relationship, but while it lasted, it was difficult to say which of them had enjoyed his present more. The biggest downside had been not anticipating the moment when Patti Donnelly asked at the dining room table, “What did you get him, dear?” Elisabeth’s cheeks had burned hotter than the candles on the cake.
“Okay, Arden.” The sound of Justin’s rumbling baritone snapped Elisabeth out of her memories. He was buckling the baby into the infant car seat that doubled as a carrier. “We already put the base for the seat in my SUV, I’ve got her feeding schedule, her blanket, the insanely heavy diaper bag, the folding travel crib, a partridge and a pear tree. If that’s everything, I’m heading out.”
Kaylee’s bottom lip, much like the Grinch’s heart, grew three sizes. “You’re going already? Can I go with you?”
While he’d been busy gathering baby gear, Justin had apparently missed the part about Kaylee being in the pictures. “Want me to get her out from underfoot for a couple of hours?” he asked Elisabeth. He no doubt thought he was doing them a favor, keeping the girl occupied while they had their photo shoot. “I could use an assistant babysitter.”
Steven met her gaze. “You did say you wanted to run some wedding errands after. I don’t mind if she stays with Justin. If he doesn’t mind waiting a few minutes so Arden can take the pictures with her first?”
Justin shrugged in agreement, and Kaylee beamed so brightly that pictures of her would probably come out overexposed. Elisabeth was the only person in the room who didn’t seem delighted with the arrangement. It wasn’t that she minded Justin looking after Kaylee. It would be much easier to concentrate on pricing at the bakery and florist without a six-year-old underfoot, but... Was Steven avoiding the little girl? He sometimes seemed to be at a loss for what to say to her, which she understood. He was an only child without a lot of experience with kids. But if they were going to be married, he couldn’t avoid Elisabeth’s daughter forever.
That wasn’t a discussion for the lobby of Arden’s studio, however.
“Thank you,” she told Justin. “You’ve made her day. Again.”
“I’m glad. I’ve always liked her.” He watched fondly as Kaylee executed happy twirls around the reception area, her blue-and-green plaid skirt billowing out over her leggings. “It was horrible what she and her mother went through. Not that I met Michelle, but I’ve seen what cancer does. And when Kaylee moved here...”
She waited, curious what he would say.
“Never mind. You should be getting ready for your close-up, not wasting time with me.”
She retreated to check her makeup and straighten Kaylee’s blue hair bow, but his casual words stayed with her. He’d said “wasting time.”
There had been a point after their breakup when she’d wondered if the months with him had been a waste. Why had she invested so much in a relationship that a more intelligent woman might have seen was doomed from their first date? Yet, she didn’t think she’d ever truly loved a man until Justin. There’d been crushes, of course, and boyfriends about whom she’d cared deeply. But he had been different. Before him, she’d never once rolled over in the morning and thought, That’s the face I want to wake up to for the rest of my life. Even though their relationship hadn’t worked out, maybe he’d opened her up to new possibilities, new depths of feeling.
Her time with Justin had been many things—unexpected, adventurous, infuriating, arousing and ultimately wrenching. But it hadn’t been a waste.
* * *
JUSTIN FOUND HIMSELF half wishing that baby Hope would wake up and cry. At least then, he could walk with her, patting her back and feeling useful. While she slept peacefully in the carrier, he had nothing to do but watch and wait. He looked on while Arden and Elisabeth admired each other’s engagement rings, and he had a surreal moment where it felt as if everyone around him were getting married. In reality, he only knew of the two couples, but since he was in the room with one and a half of those couples, it still left him strangely isolated.
Then Arden got the trio arranged in front of a formal background, and Justin had to admit the future Miller family looked good together. They’d color-coordinated in a way that was unifying but not so identical that it created a disturbing Stepford effect. Steven’s tie was the same color blue as the sweater beneath Elisabeth’s blazer, highlighting the blue in Kaylee’s print dress. Justin had to glance away. The tableau they made, smiling and nestled together, was too much. Too taunting, too treacherous.
Looking at them would beguile most anyone into daydreams about white picket fences and silver anniversaries, but that wasn’t the whole story, was it? He remembered quite well how happy his parents had looked together. And how losing Rebecca Cade had devastated his father. As far as Justin was concerned, the man had died of a broken heart. After Rebecca’s death, Justin’s dad sank into depression and a series of seemingly unrelated maladies until his heart failed. For the final years of his life, the man had been more a ghost of himself than an actual father. And now there was Colin....
Justin couldn’t imagine the hell Colin had endured when he lost his wife and young son; he only knew that since then, his brother had gone renegade. He’d given up his job, his home and all but a few remaining ties to his brother and sister. Thinking of how different Colin had become, how bitter, Justin forced himself to look back at Elisabeth. Despite the smiles beaming at the camera, was there anything on the other side of his sister’s lens that wholly justified the emotional risk?
Arden worked quickly, changing sets and poses while respecting her clients’ time. “I think I’ve got some great shots of the three of you,” she told Elisabeth, “if you want to release Kaylee and focus on the engagement pictures.”
“Sounds good.” Elisabeth hugged Kaylee and admonished her to behave. Then she turned to Justin. “I promise we’ll try to get through our errands quickly. I don’t want to take advantage of your generosity. Do you want to meet us somewhere, or should I just pick her up at your place?”
“My place is fine.”
She averted her gaze, and he wondered if she recalled the last time she was there, after his birthday. They’d had a hell of a night that lasted into early morning. She’d been the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen, dawn bathing her naked skin as she drifted to sleep in his bed, her red-gold hair fanned across the pillow in a near match for the sun’s rays. As he’d watched her, it felt as if something had cracked inside him.
“I should change,” she said after an awkward pause. “See you both later.”
Justin helped bundle Kaylee into her jacket, then picked up the baby carrier. They were on their way to his SUV when the door to the studio flew open behind them.
“We forgot the booster seat,” Elisabeth called, chasing after them in such a hurry she hadn’t even bothered with a jacket. She looked stunning in a wraparound black dress. Apparently, she’d wanted something more sophisticated for the engagement photos than the wholesome family portrait. It was a deceptively simple garment—hanging in a closet, it might even have looked boring. But molded to her lush curves, it was silky, sinful temptation.
They transferred Kaylee’s seat to his SUV, and Justin was momentarily disoriented, as if he’d hit his head hard. Or fallen into an alternate dimension. He was the most confirmed bachelor and least likely family man in all of Cielo Peak. So why was he pulling out of the parking lot with two adorable little girls buckled into the back of his vehicle like he was a freaking soccer mom?
During the drive to his house, snow began to fall. There was already plenty of accumulation on the ground, but he never got tired of the untouched magic of brand-new snow, blanketing over ruts and muddy patches.
“Can we make a snowman?” Kaylee asked as they pulled into his driveway.
“Not today, kiddo. We should stay inside with Hope in case she wakes up. But I have an idea. I haven’t started decorating my tree yet. Want to help?” After getting home yesterday evening with his impulsive purchase, he’d discovered that he owned exactly three ornaments.
There was a snowboarding Santa in a pair of goggles; Trey Grainger’s wife had bought them in bulk last year and given one to each of the eighty patrollers. Then there was a promotional ornament that had come free with a six-pack of soda at some point. Finally, there were two cartoonish cats embracing under a sprig of mistletoe, a memento from the month he’d dated a waitress named Kitty.
Even though he’d deliberately picked a small tree, he was going to need more than three meager ornaments. He’d knocked off a few of the evergreen needles while trying to get the tree situated on a coffee table, and he didn’t own a proper tree stand, so he’d improvised. As a result, the tree was leaning slightly to the left. It was a little like Charlie Brown’s tree. No, that wasn’t true—it was like another, sadder tree that aspired to be half as grand as Chuck’s.
She crossed her arms over her chest. “Are all your decorations breakful, too?”
“You mean breakable? Like glass and stuff?”
She bobbed her head in affirmation. “I’m not allowed to touch those kind.”
“Good news, I don’t have any breakable ornaments. In fact, you’re looking at all my decorations.”
“Don’t you know where the stores are?” she asked, clearly aghast that he couldn’t figure out how to buy more.
“Yes, but I thought we could make some ornaments. Like out of popcorn and stuff.”
“I like popcorn.”
“Then we’re in business.” Just as soon as he located the needle and thread he was about 80 percent sure he owned. He had a dim recollection of buying a kit to replace a button before he’d decided he didn’t like that particular shirt enough to bother.
The baby stayed asleep while he microwaved two bags of popcorn, burning one of them slightly. He got the popcorn started so that Kaylee didn’t accidentally stab herself with the business end of the needle, then let her slide the pieces down the string. She also ate some of the would-be decorations, but he told himself that at least popcorn had no sugar. As they worked, he remembered Arden once making a chain of paper loops. Since he didn’t have any construction paper, he brought Kaylee a stack of his Sports Illustrated magazines. He showed her how to look for colorful pictures and tear the page into strips.
Soon after that, Hope woke, loudly demanding a bottle. Justin settled into a chair with her and watched as Kaylee glued strips of varying width into lopsided circles. Truth be told, he thought more of the glue was getting on her than on the chain, but at least she was enjoying herself.
As soon as they hung the makeshift decorations, however, Kaylee frowned at him. “Y
ou don’t have any lights. Christmas trees need lights. It’s a rule.”
“A rule, huh?” Did he own lights? He couldn’t recall the last time he’d done any holiday decorating beyond a novelty wreath on his front door, but surely somewhere... He had a sudden brainstorm. Back in October, his sister’s best friend had drafted him to help with the high school’s haunted house fund-raiser. He still had a few strings of lights in a miscellaneous box in the garage.
Situating Hope in the supportive baby sling he’d found in her bag, he headed into the garage. He returned with one string of purple bats and another of orange pumpkins. “These are the best I could do,” he told Kaylee. “A little unorthodox, but they do light up when you plug them in.”
Now his crooked tree, which was previously decked in three mismatched ornaments, also bore a popcorn garland, a paper chain soggy with glue and orange-and-purple Halloween lights. Yeah, that’s progress.
“Guess it doesn’t look much like the one you have at home, does it, kiddo?”
“Nuh-uh.” She stared up at him, brown eyes full of something perilously close to hero worship. “Yours is way better.”
* * *
ELISABETH SHOULD BE filled with satisfaction. In a short period of time, she and Steven had accomplished a lot, crossing a number of items off their to-do list. But she couldn’t shake her nagging sense of unease. It grew worse the closer they got to Justin’s house.
Even the clicking of her blinker as she waited to turn left set her nerves on edge. “Steven, can I tell you something?”
He glanced up immediately from whatever he’d been reading on his cell phone. “Of course. You know I’m always here to listen.”
Second Chance Christmas (The Colorado Cades) Page 7