“Your bags are checked all the way through to San Diego, Ms. Gibson.” The attendant looked closer at her computer monitor. “Just one way?” she asked.
“You’re damned right,” Mistress Krystal replied adamantly. “I never want to see snow again.”
Down in Birmingham, Alabama at the Wardle & Ward Advertising Agency, the imposing figure of former football player and agency president Bucky Ward stood in front of his eighty seven employees and with a big downhome smile as he introduced his latest employee.
“Hey folks, let’s show some good ‘ol southern hospitality to your new chief executive, Mr. Kurt Fitzgerald, even though he’s a damn Yankee!” Bucky joked, though the employees didn’t seem especially amused. They gave Fitz a rather underwhelming round of applause, which didn’t exactly fill Fitz with confidence. Bucky Ward leaned over and put a big strong arm around his shoulder. He whispered in Fitz’s ear. “Don’t worry, son. They’ll loosen up over time.”
On the south side of town, in Mistress Krystal’s old apartment, Mr. Winkle stood naked in front of Mistress Queen Lorraine as she cracked a bullwhip across his bare flesh.
Craaack!!!
“Owwww!” yelled Mr. Winkle.
“What d’you say, motherfucker?” Lorraine barked at him.
“Thank you, Mistress Queen Lorraine, O beautiful African Goddess and…er…”
Craaack!!!
The bullwhip ripped into Mr. Winkle’s flesh once more, tearing the skin on his stomach with a long slash.
“African Goddess and Bitch Babe!” Lorraine yelled.
“Please. Don’t hit me quite so hard, please,” Mr. Winkle asked politely.
“Shut your pie-hole, Winkle. And if you even think of pissing on my floor I’ll bite your damn dick off, you hear me? You hear me?” Lorraine screamed at her terrified client.
Meanwhile, back in Hopkins, Bake & Brew was flourishing without much need for any advertising at all. Word of mouth, social media and some blogging did the trick and it didn’t cost a penny. In fact, they got so busy they needed extra help, so they hired Justine, who’d recently been laid off and who was delighted to be reunited with her old boss, though it was Tara who was her new boss now.
It was suggested that the little chubby man with the paintbrush and ladder should come back out to visit them and rename their store Kakes & Koffee but Clem, Tara’s marketing manager, insisted that would create confusion with their brand and seriously impact their demographic. As Tara liked to say to Justine – You can take the man out the ad biz but you can’t take the ad biz out of the man.
Mistress Krystal never did come back from California much to the delight of Lorraine who’d finally discovered an occupation that she found immensely satisfying and fulfilled everything that was missing in her life. What’s more, the tight bodice she wore did wonders for her lower back pain. And the fact that the job allowed her to exact revenge on the male species without any legal repercussions other than a wad of cash every time she vented her anger on her willing subjects was manna from Heaven.
As for Frank Bergenson, he enjoyed living in retirement on the French Riviera for two fabulously relaxing weeks before suffering a massive heart attack. He died in Saint Roch Hospital in Nice a few days later.
And in a dimly lit room somewhere in Birmingham, Alabama, a large-breasted woman who called herself Mistress Diana was entertaining a new client.
Thhhwaaack!
The whiplash crack of the riding crop made him flinch. But the sound of her stiletto heels on the bare floorboards seemed to excite him.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
As well as being an author, Tony is also an Emmy Award winning writer and filmmaker, musician and photographer. His documentary work includes The Royal Academy and Mondo Bondo. He attended Westminster City Grammar School in London and is a graduate of Ealing College of Art & Design in England. In 2006, Tony was the recipient of the Individual Artist Fellowship awarded by The Tennessee Arts Commission. He has worked professionally as a copywriter in advertising for over 20 years on both sides of the Atlantic and has lived in San Francisco, Los Angeles, Nashville and Minneapolis. Tony is married and was born in London, England.
Chardonnay Press is a Limited Liability Company
Table of Contents
Font Cover
Title Page
Copyright
Author’s Note
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
About the Author
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