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Erotic Romance by D.C. McMillen
After finding her louse of a boyfriend playing hide the sausage with a local deli clerk, Nina moves to Toronto. Determined to swear off men for a yet to be determined amount of time, she shells $60 for a Hitachi Magic Wand and calls it a night. When her abnormally handsome neighbour, Ned, takes a liking to her English bull dog, Betty, however, Nina realizes that December just might be the hottest month of the year.
A Decent December
by D.C. McMillen
Published by MuseItUp Publishing at Smashwords
ISBN: 978-1-77127-214-8
Copyright 2012 D.C. McMillen
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A Decent December
By D.C. McMillen
December is supposed to be the month of wrap ups, of endings. The year comes to a close, and it gets you to thinking about ending old habits. About closing doors and filing all the shit that’s happened to you over the course of the year under ‘S’ in the old mental filing cabinet. This December, however, turned out to be a month of discoveries.
First, I discovered my asshole boyfriend in bed with Lorna, a bag of almost-twice-my-age from the grocery store where Al worked. Next, I discovered a new city. My company had been on me to relocate to their new office for months and, after finding Al playing hide the sausage with that leather-skinned deli clerk, I could no longer think of a reason not to move to Toronto. So, I packed up Betty, my English Bull dog with a severe under bite, and high-tailed it to Ontario.
The next big discovery I made was the actual magic that is the Hitachi Magic Wand. I’d been putting off shelling out the sixty bucks for that little toy for over a year. Since I’d sworn off men, however, and had yet to make any friends in Toronto to distract me from my distinct lack of quality orgasms, I decided to give it a go. Wowzers, am I glad I did! That thing gets me from zero to oh in about three and a half minutes. Two minutes if I switch it to the high speed, which is very convenient for me if I don’t want to miss Conan’s opening monologue. Yep, Mr. Hitachi became part of my late night routine.
Finally, I discovered Ned. Ned is my super hot neighbour. He loves Betty and every time we cross paths in the hallway of our building, he spends five minutes fawning over her. I spend an equal amount of time chastising my heart for making these ridiculous pitter-pattering type flips against my ribcage. I mean, I’m a grown woman, for God’s sake. These physiological responses to cute boys were supposed to end in grade school.
While I admired Ned from afar, he admired Betty from up close. He even offered his services as a dog walker, if I ever found myself in a bind. Of course, I was positive Ned’s interest in me began and ended with my dog. That did not stop me from fantasizing about the man taking the place of old Mr. Hitachi once in a while. Alas, I resigned myself to playing second fiddle to Betty. That is, until one frigid day just a week after I arrived in Toronto.
“Nina! Hey, wait up!”
I turned to see Ned dodge a couple cars as he jogged across the street. Even in an unflattering track suit, he was lithe and attractive. As he caught up to me, a chocolate brown lock fell across his forehead. Thankfully, he brushed it away with his hand before my willpower ran out and I did it for him.
“Taking Betty for a walk? I was going to go for a jog, but a walk sounds nice, too. Mind if I join you?”
“Sure, that’d be fun. Especially for Betty.” At that we both looked down. Betty had already assumed belly rub position, lying across Ned’s feet. He bent down to oblige. When he stood again, she rolled over with all the grace of a turtle scrambling to right itself after being flipped on its shell.
As we walked in the direction of the Harbourfront, I concentrated on trying to come up with something clever to say. Then I realised my face was probably screwed into a knot, like it does when I’m concentrating on things. So I then began concentrating on not bunching my features while concentrating on something interesting to say. Needless to say, I did not come up with any gems so I breathed a sigh of relief when he asked what I did for a living. So simple! Why didn’t I think of that topic?
“I work with interior designers to procure artwork for corporations. Mostly they rent as opposed to purchase so I schedule the rotation of the pieces.” Congratulations, Nina! You strung together a cohesive sentence. Wait, it did make sense, right? I mentally repeated my answer and concluded that, yes, I did good.
“Wow, that’s great! Do you procure pieces as well?” he asked, and I melted a little at the sound of his deep, rumbling voice.
“Sure, I’m always on the lookout for more art.”
“I own a small gallery in the Distillery District. I concentrate almost entirely on up and coming Canadian artists. You should stop by and check it out.”
“I’ll do that,” I said. My heart swelled a little.
“I have an exhibit on right now featuring Mitchell Chan. Have you heard of him?”
“Yeah, sure. Isn’t he studying at School of the Art Institute of Chicago? He was awarded a scholarship there, right?”
“That’s him! Wow, we have a lot in common.”
“Um, yeah, we sure do.” My heart started up with that stupid pitter-patter thing again.
“Hey, do you want to go for coffee? The Pawsway just down the street allows you to bring your dog inside.”
“It does? There are so many things I have to discover about Toronto.”
“Yeah? Why don’t I show you around? Say, Friday night? We can start at my gallery and have dinner at the Boiler House just around the corner. You definitely need to check out the Distillery District.”
And just like that, Ned and I started dating. At least, I think we were dating. I mean, we never really made out or anything, we just sort of went places together.
In fact, over the last couple of weeks in December, Ned took me everywhere in Toronto. I discovered the Distillery District, Cabbage Town, High Park, Kensington Market, and Spadina. We ate Yogen Früz at the Eaton Centre and visited Hemingway’s in Yorkville. Unfortunately, he had to go home for the Christmas holidays but promised to take me to Vaughan Mills in January.
While he was gone, to the middle of nowheresville in Northern Ontario according to him, I missed Ned terribly. I tried not to think about the fact he hadn’t hit on me yet. I mean, maybe it was not that abnormal? Just because every schmuck I ever dated tried to get in my pants on the first date did not mean I should expect the same from Ned. Gorgeous, not-at-all thinning haired, no beer bellied Ned. Wowzers. I swear over the Christmas break, I almost blew the motor on poor old Mr. Hitachi.
Betty and I flew back to Vancouver to spend Christmas Eve and Christmas Day with my friends. I told them all about the fabulous neighbour, Ned, including the fact he had yet to so much as kiss me. My heart ached more than a little over his absence. I really missed him. After I finally finished my incessant ramblings about the man, my friends took a vote on whether he was my boyfriend or just my buddy. They came up about fifty-fifty, so my vote was supposed to be the tie breaker. Unfortunately, I felt hollow and dry. Self-doubt and melancholy, likely brought on by the void caused by the small part of me that Ned took with him to Northern Ontario, made me think I was a fool for even hoping Ned’s interest in me stemmed any further than his love for my dog. As if punctuating her profound effect on peopl
e, Betty let out a loud snore as she rolled over. My friends all giggled at her unladylike behaviour.
I returned to Toronto with a weight on my chest. I missed Ned. He didn’t miss me. Of this I was sure.
On the evening of December thirtieth, there was a soft knock on my door. It was so soft, in fact, I wondered if I imagined it. Unfolding my penguin print flannel covered legs, I was about to investigate when the knock sounded again, louder and more insistent. The knocking continued until I answered the door, swinging it open with the power of a gale force wind.
“What?” I yelled. “Oh, um, hi.”
“I’m sorry, did I get you at a bad time?”
“No, no. Don’t be silly.” I mean, sure I was standing in front of the most gorgeous man in our building whilst wearing purple flannel pyjamas with skateboarding penguins on them, thick framed glasses, and a messy ponytail piled atop my head. At least I had removed the wax from my upper lip about ten minutes earlier. Whew! “Um, would you like to come in?”
“Yes,” he said, picking up a large duffel bag.
“Wait. Before I let you in, what’s in the bag? You don’t have a chainsaw and hefty bags in there, do you? I mean, you don’t strike me as the axe murdering type but I have made errors in judgement of character before.”
Ned dropped the bag and wrapped his arms around my waist. His full, boyish lips found mine and just like that he was kissing me. It took a few moments for me to overcome my shock before I actually started kissing him back. He stopped and stepped away.
“I’m sorry, Nina. Did you not want me to... I mean, I just missed you so much. If you don’t feel the same—”
It was my turn to cut him off. I did this by jumping on him, wrapping my legs around his slim waist, and covering his lips with my own. His hands slipped under my thighs as he kicked his bag inside the apartment. We moved blindly about until he slammed the door with his heel and whipped me around. My back rested against the cool wood. I groaned as his lips left mine to scrape across my chin, jaw, and neck.
His hand found my breast and I was sure he could feel my heart pounding against my rib cage.
“I was so determined to take it slow with you, Nina. But I can’t get you out of my head. I felt empty without you over the holidays.”
I was shocked and delighted his feelings mirrored mine. And then more intense emotions took over as he squeezed my nipple. Reaching for the hem of my oversized shirt, I pulled it upward. He caught it and helped me get it over my head before dropping it on the floor by his bag. Again his hand found my breast, but this time flesh contacted with flesh and my entire body tensed at the sensation. Now I wanted more. I wanted to feel his breath, his lips, his teeth on my nipple. I wanted his chest pressed against mine.
“The bedroom is that way,” I breathed the words.
Carrying and kissing me the entire way, he wobbled across the small apartment until we arrived at the bedroom. Together we fell onto my bed. That’s when clothes started flying. Briefly I considered the fact it was going to be a pain to gather all the clothing later. That was my last rational thought.
His hands and lips were everywhere. I ran my own fingers along his well formed abs and flat tummy. As my nails lightly scraped his pubic hair he sucked in his breath and stilled his movements. I dipped my hand lower and softly touched his velvety soft head. He gasped and his forehead fell into the crook of my neck. My hand closed over the thick shaft and I swear I felt him tremble. Slowly, firmly I pumped my fist up and down against his hard cock, enjoying the sound of his quickening breath in my ear. Cupping his balls with my other hand, I felt them tighten.
“Wait! Oh God, wait,” he groaned after a few minutes. He gently swatted my hands away. “I don’t want to do that yet.”
I allowed him to loosely pin my hands above my head with one hand as the flat of his other palm moved along the middle of my chest, past my belly, and over my vee. My entire being responded when his fingers grazed my clit. His thumb moved to circle the soft mound as his fingers continued on their path, gently parting my labia and dipping one at a time into my pussy. I cried out, squirming against him. All of me—except my barely trapped wrists—moved in pleasure.
Two fingers curled inside me. A low moan escaped my lips as I bucked against him. My temperature rose with every one of his movements. My muscles tightened around him as waves of pleasure coursed through me. My eyelids squeezed tight and fireworks began going off behind my eyelids. I’m sure I mumbled nonsensical things, as was my habit when the intense pleasure of an orgasm possessed my body. Oh God, did he give Mr. Hitachi a run for his money!
When I finally opened my eyes, it took a moment to focus on his beautiful face. It took me a moment longer to realize his sober expression, a complete opposite of mine, I assumed.
“Um, is something wrong?” I asked. A twinge of panic landed in my gut. Oh God, did I make my stupid concentrating face? I bet I totally turned him off. “Did I make a stupid face?”
“No, not at all,” he answered thickly. “I just, um, have a confession to make.”
“Oh?” The panic in my gut intensified.
“Well, first, I need to tell you that the walls in this building are very thin.”
“I know that. I can hear you singing Papa Was a Rolling Stone in the shower every morning.”
“You can hear that? How embarrassing.” He smiled at me and my panic dissipated just a touch. “Well, I can hear you, too. At night. See, my bedroom is on the other side of this wall.”
Stupid me, it took a few beats for me to get at what he was saying.
“And I hear you, at night, right between Colbert and Conan. You drive me crazy, Nina. I hear you with your toy and I touch myself, too. I don’t know if that’s wrong or creepy or something but I can’t help myself.”
How embarrassing, indeed. I still can’t believe it never occurred to me he could hear me masturbating. I mean, I heard him singing in the shower while sitting in my kitchen table for Chrissake. Wowsers.
“Is that why you want to date me, Ned? Because I masturbate on a nightly basis?”
“No, absolutely not! I really like you, Nina. And even though we’ve only been seeing each other for three weeks, I missed you like crazy over these last few days. Hell, I even cut my holiday short so I could see you sooner.”
It was true, he did tell me not to expect him home until after New Years. “Well then, why are you telling me about your eavesdropping now? At this exact moment, while we’re lying naked in my bed?”
“Well, um, I’m hoping you can introduce me to Mr. Hitachi.”
“You know its name?” I near shouted. Oh God, so embarrassing!
“Oh sure, you shout it out sometimes.”
“Wowsers. Holy shit.” I took a deep breath. “Wowzers.”
“If you’re not cool with it, that’s okay,” he said quickly. Despite the fact that only a sliver of moonlight managed to slice through the drapes, I could clearly see his face turn deep red. “I’m sorry, I just fucked things up, didn’t I?”
He sounded so miserable my heart went out to him. My concern over his feelings transcended my own embarrassment.
“No, Neddie, you didn’t fuck anything up. Honestly. Please don’t be embarrassed. Introducing Mr. Hitachi to our lovemaking might be fun.” And as soon as I said it, I realised it was true.
“Yeah?”
“Absolutely.” Suddenly my fingers itched for the Magic Wand. Ned moved out of the way so I could reach my bedside table. When I pulled out the Hitachi Magic Wand, Ned’s eyes widened to saucers.
“Holy shit, that’s huge!”
“Well, it doesn’t go inside me silly! It’s for my clit.” I turned the magic wand onto the low setting and pressed it against the inside bend of his elbow. He jumped a little and smiled. My lips mirrored his as I slowly moved the wand between my legs. My clit was already swollen and sensitive so when I lightly pressed the wand to the mound, the vibrations seemed to cut through my entire body. My lids drooped, but so did Ned’s. As m
y breathing became heavy and rapid, so did his.
He jumped off the bed to retrieve his jeans. I watched him produce a condom from the pocket, rip the wrapper open, and roll the condom over his hard shaft. Low moans escaped my lips as he positioned himself between my legs.
“You should hurry,” I whispered. “This thing gets me off in about three minutes.”
“That works for me. I’ve been waiting for this moment for so long, I don’t think I can last much longer than that.” He offered a sexy wink. “Next time, I promise.”
I nodded, swallowing hard.
The sensation of Ned’s hard clock sliding deep inside me while the vibrations of the wand did their magic was indescribable. He filled me so completely, and it was almost like the wand helped him touch every part of me. I could feel him in my curling toes, in the tips of my fingers, behind my eyelids. The pleasure was so intense I lost my grip on the wand and Ned had to take over for me. The familiar waves of my orgasm came this time in the form of a tidal wave or a tsunami. I shouted, I moaned, I cried out Ned’s name as my climax shook me to the core.
“Ned! Ned!” I screamed as my body bucked against his hard flesh.
His body began to move more quickly, more forcefully. He dropped Mr. Hitachi but at this point I no longer cared. I was more concerned about my eyeballs bouncing around in my skull.
He moaned loudly as his orgasm drew near. His face screwed up just like mine did when I was concentrating or climaxing and I wondered how he managed to look so cute like that. His body jerked and then jerked again. My favourite part was when he cried out my name as he came.
His arms gave out and he landed on top of me. We listened to the sounds of our breathing until he finally broke the silence.
“Can I sleep over?”
“Why not? I assume you have a toothbrush in that duffel bag of yours.”
Betty chose that moment to enter the bedroom and fluff her bed, readying it for a comfortable night of sleep.
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