Light candles. I love scented candles, particularly at the holidays. My favorites are from the Gap and Nest. They really remind me of what a Vermont inn smells like. Your guests will love the smell, too. Cinnamon or pumpkin spice scents are great for fall parties.
Have a drink. You need it.
PARTY 101
Throwing a great party is more art than science and sometimes it’s hard to figure out why one party is amazing and another is a flop. But I’ve figured out a few strategies for stacking the odds in your favor:
1. Timing is everything. I always call the party for 8 P.M. and I know the first person will arrive at 8:30 P.M. It’s nice to have a few close friends promise to get there on the dot, just so you’re not panicking in an empty apartment. Every party has its own rhythm and there’s going to be an ebb and flow, so don’t get anxious if it feels like the energy is starting to flag (for more on how to keep the energy up, read on). Expect the prime time of the party will be 9:00 to 10:30 P.M. and then the last guests will likely leave around midnight—and those will be your closest friends and/or the person you’re having sex with. I’ve never had to kick anyone out, but I remember once I was sweeping the floor at 12:30 A.M. and someone actually rang the bell. I gave them some leftover cookies and sent them on their way.
2. Music. I used to always start out with slow R&B, and then I’d move on to some more up-tempo stuff as the evening went on. You know the tastes (and age group) of the crowd you’ve invited, so it’s fun to throw in something nostalgic—Michael Jackson never fails. Now that I work in satellite radio, I don’t bother with CDs or a playlist, I just turn on SiriusXM. You can’t go wrong with its music channels, and there are hundreds to pick from. Sirius XM even has annual Christmas-themed channels. Just stay tuned to the energy level in the room. If it’s still early in the party and things are starting to drag, pick up the beat. If it’s later in the party and things are starting to mellow, then it’s fine to keep it that way.
3. No sitting down. Unless there’s a reason certain people would have a tough time standing, I try to get as much seating out of my apartment as possible. You want people moving and circulating, not plopping themselves down, glued to one spot. I’ve actually moved furniture into neighbors’ apartments (and rugs, too, because a wooden floor is a lot easier to clean than a carpet).
4. No clumping. The best parties offer a mix of people who don’t all know one another. And I feel like it’s my job as hostess to introduce different groups of people to each other. Otherwise, you end up with a party where everyone is attached with Velcro to the one or two people they know, like it’s the first day of school. I get a lot of pleasure from figuring out who would love to meet each other. Maybe this person works in print media and that one works in radio and I think they’d like comparing notes. Maybe this person is a marathoner and that one is a cyclist. Maybe she’s a dog lover and he’s a vet. I have spent whole parties dragging my guests around meeting each other—I will actually take them by the hand and pull them away from whatever security blanket they’ve attached themselves to. Don’t be shy about it. This is your job, and everyone will have more fun this way—and they’ll thank you for it later. Because when that dog lover has a problem with her best friend, who do you think she’s going to call? Introducing people is my way of giving back to the people I love.
5. Always keep lipstick nearby. Touch-ups are important when you’re running yourself ragged while being a social butterfly.
6. Make sure your air-conditioning works if the temperature outside is warmer than 75. If it’s a good party, then it’s crowded, and it will be hot. Even in the winter, packed parties can get steamy. One year, in the dead of winter, my air-conditioning was on the fritz and people were sweating. It’s no fun to see your male friends’ dress shirts sticking to their bodies like they just ran a few laps. It’s a cookie marathon you’re throwing, not an actual road race.
7. Make sure your neighbors know you’re having a party, and if you like them (or don’t actively dislike them), then invite them. Either way, make sure to warn them about your party in advance. Then they won’t complain.
8. Seek help! You don’t have to do everything yourself. If guests ask if they can bring anything, don’t be shy—say yes. And don’t hesitate to be specific so you get what you need instead of duplicates of what you don’t. I’ve never seen wine go to waste, so you can always ask for a few backups. You can ask friends to bring their favorite cookies, too. If you know you’ve got plenty of chocolate chip cookies made, give them an idea of what kind of cookie would really add to the array. Even if the cookies your guests bring aren’t all equally great, you can put them out at the end of the night when your guests are too well lubricated to care. You can also enlist some extra sets of hands at the party. When I realized that I was too busy shuttling cookies back and forth from the kitchen to enjoy my guests, Joan Hamburg of WOR Radio gave me the brilliant advice to hire a few students from the Columbia University Bartending School. I have them come early, show them where everything is, and then they can refill platters and restock the bar. It’s amazing help and worth every penny (and it’s really not that expensive). Plus, if you still have any cookies or brownies left over at the end of the night, they’ll be more than happy to take them off your hands.
WHEN MY GUESTS ARRIVE, usually the first thing they say to me is, “Where’s Lucky?” He’s the real celebrity at my parties. But forget it, Lucky makes a quick disappearing act before the doorbell even rings. He knows what’s good for him and he stays well hidden until about 11:30, when he emerges to take a star turn for the few remaining guests.
And it’s not just cats that can get shell-shocked by entertaining. At a certain point—it might be the stroke of midnight, or it might be 5 A.M. the next morning or 12:30 the next afternoon—you will look around your post-cookie-party home and you will ask yourself what the heck you were thinking. You’ll find your own cat (or your dog, or your boyfriend) cowering under the bed, and he will be wondering the same thing.
Then, you’ll clean up the mess, get over the trauma, and you’ll want to do the whole thing again next year—and do it even better. Chocolate stains are temporary, wine stains less so, but the memories of your cookie party are forever.
I know people who refuse to serve red wine at their parties just to avoid the mess, but that’s not who I am. I’d rather stock up on club soda and salt than tell my guests they can’t drink something that stains. Over the years, I’ve had maybe one really bad carpet stain that I had to call in professionals to deal with, and that’s not so bad.
Just accept in advance that you’ll find a cookie ground into a spot in your apartment that you never would have expected. After the last guest leaves (and preferably with the help of a friend), sweep up the worst of it, and collect dirty plates, cups, and all food scraps into bags. You don’t have to clean everything, because you really want to crash at this point, but you do want to get rid of anything that smells or you might step in on your way to the bathroom in the middle of the night. Finally, take all that trash out of the apartment so you don’t have to smell it the next morning.
The next day—after you’ve had a cup of coffee—you can deal with the rest. And you can enjoy all the e-mails and texts and tweets and Facebook wall posts you get from people who loved your party. Despite all the hard work, you might even find yourself suffering from a bout of PCPS (post-cookie-party syndrome). I know I always do. A good antidote is to pack up any leftovers and take them into work Monday morning. Then you can soak up a few more compliments.
THERE ISN’T A WRONG cookie to make for a cookie party, but here are some more party-tested winners that I guarantee will make your guests happy. And if you’re a newbie baker, my best advice is: don’t worry. It’s very hard to go wrong with butter and sugar—and chocolate and peanut butter. If you make sure your invite list is diverse and your bar is well stocked, you could serve cookies made of flavored Styrofoam and your guests would still walk away happy.
MINI APPLE PIES
When I first started throwing cookie parties, I tried serving full-sized cakes and pies, but they were never as popular as the cookies. It’s just too hard to hold a drink in one hand and try to eat something with a fork with the other hand. And once you start cutting into a pie, it stops looking nice on the table, so the whole display can become an unappetizing mess. The solution? Mini apple pies. My guests love these, and they’re one of my favorite recipes. They’re just as delicious at room temperature, but if you have time before the party starts, you can pop these into a 325-degree oven for about 10 minutes to warm them up. They smell amazing.
2 ready-made piecrusts
For the apple filling:
2 Granny Smith apples, peeled and diced
1½ tablespoons sugar
¼ teaspoon ground cinnamon
For the strudel topping:
⅓ cup butter (cold)
⅓ cup flour
¼ cup sugar
¼ cup brown sugar
1½ teaspoons cinnamon
2½-inch round cookie cutter
Minimuffin pan
Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
Using the 2½-inch round cookie cutter, cut out 24 circles to form mini-piecrusts. Place one circle in each well of a minimuffin pan, and push dough down, forming a cup shape.
In a bowl, toss together diced apples, sugar, and cinnamon until apples are well coated.
Fill each dough cup (two-thirds full) with apples.
In another bowl, with hands (my preferred method) or a pastry cutter, smush together butter, flour, sugars, and cinnamon to form a strudel. Place small amount (about a teaspoon) of strudel over each mini apple pie.
Bake 15 minutes until the topping turns lightly brown. When cooled, dust with powdered sugar.
Makes 24 mini apple pies.
PLAIN-AS-BUTTER COOKIES
These cookies are so delicious, and they remind me of something important: things don’t have to be complicated to be good. With so many cookies with different textures and tastes, it’s nice to serve a basic butter cookie. And as any chef will tell you, it’s the simple recipes that test your technique—if you can bake a butter or a sugar cookie, then you’re good to go with everything else.
¾ cup (1½ sticks) unsalted butter, softened
1 cup sugar
1 egg
½ teaspoon vanilla
2 cups all-purpose flour
½ teaspoon baking powder
Parchment-lined cookie sheets
Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
Using a standing or handheld mixer, beat butter and sugar until fluffy. Scrape down sides. Add egg and vanilla. Mix until incorporated.
In separate bowl, whisk together flour and baking powder. Slowly add to butter mixture until combined.
Chill dough for about 20 minutes. This makes it easier to scoop.
Using your ⅜-ounce ice cream scoop, scoop out balls of dough and place them 2 inches apart on the parchment-lined cookie sheets. Press top of dough down gently, just a little.
Bake 11 to 13 minutes, until bottoms turn light brown. Cool on rack.
Makes about 57 small cookies.
PEPPERMINT BARK COOKIES
I started making chocolate peppermint bark bars as holiday presents for coworkers, and then I decided it would be fun to showcase the same flavors in a cookie. One look at these cookies and you’ll think Christmas, and it’s a nice little surprise to get the crunch of the peppermint as you bite into them.
½ cup (1 stick) unsalted butter, softened
1½ cups sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
3 eggs
2 cups all-purpose flour
½ cup unsweetened cocoa powder
½ teaspoon baking soda
4 ounces semisweet chocolate chips
12 candy canes
Parchment-lined cookie sheets
Preheat oven to 325 degrees.
Cream butter and sugar. Add vanilla and eggs and mix until incorporated.
In a small bowl, sift together flour, cocoa powder, and baking soda. Add slowly to butter mixture. Scrape down the sides of the bowl.
Melt chocolate chips in a microwave in three increments of 20 seconds each. Stir between each increment until smooth and fully melted. Now mix into dough.
Place candy canes in a sealed zipper bag and crush using a meat tenderizer or a rolling pin. Stir one-third of the chopped candy canes into the dough. Place in freezer for about 10 minutes until dough is firm.
Using ⅞-ounce ice cream scoop, scoop out balls of dough, dipping tops of dough balls into remaining candy canes. Place 2 inches apart on parchment-lined cookie sheets and flatten cookies slightly.
Bake for 15 to 17 minutes until cookies are firm.
If some of the candy melts outside of cookie, wait until completely cooled; it will easily break off.
Cool on racks.
CHOCOLATE SANDWICH COOKIES WITH VANILLA CRÈME
These are the bootleg version of an Oreo cookie, and even more delish. Some of the most popular cookies at my parties are copies of old childhood favorites. Who doesn’t love chocolate mixed with vanilla and a generous heaping of nostalgia?
For the chocolate cookies:
1 cup (2 sticks) unsalted butter, softened
1 cup sugar
1 egg
1 teaspoon vanilla
2½ cups all-purpose flour
½ cup cocoa powder
For the vanilla crème:
½ cup (1 stick) unsalted butter, softened
½ cup solid vegetable shortening
3½ cups confectioners’ sugar
1 tablespoon pure vanilla extract
Parchment-lined cookie sheets
2½-inch circular cookie cutter
Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
To make the cookie dough, cream butter and sugar; scrape down the sides of the bowl. Add egg and vanilla until incorporated. Add flour and cocoa powder in batches until well mixed. Make sure you scrape sides and bottom of bowl very well. Then gather the dough into a ball and divide in half, flattening into two disks. Place each disk between sheets of parchment paper and roll to ¼-inch thickness. Freeze flat for about 10 minutes, until dough is firm.
Using cookie cutter, cut out circle shapes in the dough and place on a parchment-lined cookie sheet, about 1 inch apart. Bake for about 12 to 13 minutes. Cookies should be firm and start to turn a little bit darker.
Cool on wire racks.
To prepare the vanilla crème, cream together all the ingredients until smooth and spreadable.
Turn half the cookies over, so the flatter side is facing up. These will be the bottoms. Place 1 tablespoon of crème in the center of each bottom half. Spread out to edges. Place one cookie top on each, so the slightly domed side is facing up. Press slightly.
Makes 20 sandwich cookies.
THANKFUL COOKIES
These are my favorite cookies for the fall, and I especially love baking them for Thanksgiving. The hint of orange with the oatmeal is a sure hit. My father especially loves these. When he’s visiting from Florida, I always pack him a box to take back, but they never make it to the plane.
¾ cup (1½ sticks) unsalted butter, softened
⅞ cup packed brown sugar
1 egg
¾ tablespoon honey
1 teaspoon vanilla
1 cup all-purpose flour
8 ounces old-fashioned oats (not instant)
6 ounces fresh cranberries, chopped (or half of a 12-ounce bag)
Zest of one large orange
Parchment-lined cookie sheets
⅞-ounce ice cream scoop
Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
Cream butter and sugar until fluffy. Scrape down the bowl. Beat in egg, honey, and vanilla.
Add flour and mix until well incorporated. Stir in oats, then cranberries and orange zest. Mix well.
Using your ⅞-ounce ice cream scoop, scoop out balls of dough and place on parchment-lined cookie sheet 1½ inch
es apart. Press slightly.
Bake 15 to 20 minutes. Cookies should be firm.
Cool on wire racks.
Makes 25 cookies.
GREEN TEA SHORTBREAD COOKIES
These have a delicious, subtle flavor, and their pale green color is really lovely. These are also good for those health-conscious guests who think that anything green (and green tea) must be healthy. Just don’t tell them about all the butter. Note: you can find green tea powder in health food stores and even some larger grocery stores, or online (where I’ve found it a little cheaper). And here’s a fun fact: you can also use it for a homemade facial mask! Green tea has astringent properties and is very good for the skin—just mix it with raw egg, lemon juice, and some honey or sugar and slather it on.
1 cup (2 sticks) unsalted butter, softened
½ cup sugar
¼ teaspoon salt
2 tablespoons Matcha (green tea) powder
2¼ cups flour
Parchment-lined cookie sheets
⅞-ounce ice cream scoop
Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
In mixer, blend butter and sugar until light and fluffy. Scrape down the sides of the bowl. Add salt (it brings out the flavor of the tea, so don’t skip this step). Add green tea powder. Slowly add flour until incorporated.
Make sure ingredients are mixed in well. Scrape up the bottom of bowl to make sure flour doesn’t stick. This is important to make sure cookies keep their shape and don’t spread during baking.
Using a ⅞-ounce ice cream scoop, scoop out balls of dough and place 2 inches apart on a parchment-lined cookie sheet. Balls should look like light green scoops of butter.
Bake for 15 to 18 minutes, until cookies are light brown at the edges.
Let cool completely.
When cooled pour ½ cup of confectioners’ sugar in plastic or paper bag. Put cooled cookies in bag and very gently shake until cookies are completely covered with sugar.
Makes 24 cookies.
DIVA DOODLES (A.K.A. SNICKERDOODLES)
This is another simple, nostalgic cookie that never fails to please. Even though this recipe has been around forever, these cookies always bring a smile to your face. People love the chewy texture and the hint of cinnamon. And they go really nicely with wine.
Sex, Lies, and Cookies: An Unrated Memoir Page 18