Finally before the kiss transcended all bounds of public decency, Deringer stepped back. She expected a smug grin but his face was rigid, totally expressionless except for his mouth. The usually full sensuous curves of his lips were pressed together almost as if he was in pain.
“I’ll walk you to your car,” he said as he reached for her hand. Before she could react, he aborted the gesture and simply walked beside her instead. She was annoyed at his self-control. She had been all but humping the man right there on the spot. Yes it had been a while but surely not that long. She pressed her lips together as she was suddenly flooded again with the taste and smell of him so intense she almost groaned aloud. Fortunately they had reached her car and with a brief thank you she climbed in. Starting the engine, she drove off without looking back, too afraid that she’d submit to temptation and invite him to go home with her.
* * * * *
“Are you planning to feed me real food any time soon?” Nate said.
“You must be feeling better, if you have the energy to complain about food.” Tonya adjusted the tray over his lap. It had been a week since his return and he was healing rapidly. As promised, the cutters had come back to remove his chest tube. Since then he’d been walking around the apartment quite a bit. Tonya was delighted with his progress, but she still worried. He’d had a couple of long nights of pain. He’d refused the pain medication after the first day. He didn’t like being out of control and it seemed that the anxiety from that was harder on him than the pain. Still it was difficult to watch him struggle for every breath. Her fears were at their worst at night when there was nothing to disturb her and she was left alone with her thoughts. Now it was absolutely thrilling that he’d turned the corner and would soon be well. His color was good and his movements were easy with none of the lassitude of the early days. He was still sore and there was some residual bruising, but it was a far cry from his condition when he first arrived.
“For one thing I want to know where my fish sandwich is.”
“Fish sandwich?”
“It is Saturday, isn’t it? Carlyle’s is open. They didn’t go out of business when the old man died, did they?” Nate asked, a frown of concern marring his still wan features.
“How did you -- So you weren’t just spying on me, you spied on the whole town?” she said.
“Some things just came up, but yeah. I know I was only here for a summer, but I like to think of this place as my hometown too. I promise I wasn’t really stalking you, but I just had to keep in touch somehow,” he said.
Tonya stood beside the bed, trying to respond, but really what was there to say? Nate was an orphan, had been one for most of his life. If thinking of Maple Fork as his hometown helped him deal with that what kind of monster would she be to disagree?
“Well, I wondered what was keeping you cooped up at home,” Anita said from the doorway.
Tonya whirled, stunned to see her mother and Reuben. She’d given her a seldom-used key long ago, but she’d forgotten about it. Damn.
Nate grinned. “Good to see you, Mrs. Stephens, you too, Reverend Adams.”
Anita walked over to the bed while Tonya stood transfixed on the far side nearest the wall, wondering what her mother would say. Reuben stayed back in the doorway.
“Glad to see you finally decided to come back, boy. Next time you get in trouble you’d better come home first,” her mother said to Nate.
“Yes ma’am, I’ll remember that,” Nate said in a soft whisper. Tonya reached out to touch his shoulder as tears welled in his eyes.
“Mama,” Tonya said. “How did you know?”
“I have no idea what’s going on here, and I don’t want to know,” she said with a glance over her shoulder at Reuben who then joined her beside the bed. “But I do know that him showing up after all these years is no coincidence. Tonya, why don’t you step over here for a minute.” Tonya followed her into the hall outside the bedroom, leaving Reuben with Nate. Shaking her head in concern, her mother paused and cupped Tonya’s faced in both her hands. “Baby, I can’t believe you’re letting him see you like this. At the very least you could put on some lipstick.”
Tonya knew she looked bad. The pajama bottoms and tank top she wore were hardly chic, and she hadn’t bothered to do more than wash her face and brush her teeth since Nate arrived. Fortunately she was too tired to even get irritated over her mother’s obsession with her looks. She bristled simply for form’s sake. “For God’s sake Mama! Is that all you’ve got to say?”
“For right now, yes. The man comes back after more than ten years. Comes back from the dead and you’re running around looking like you don’t have any people. And acting like it too, I might add. Is he back for good? And what happened to him?”
“I thought you didn’t want to know.”
“You’re right. Do you need any help?”
Tonya was so exhausted she could barely hold her head up, but she didn’t want to relinquish caring for Nate. “No, I’m fine.”
Anita gave her a considering look. “Tell you what; let me at least bring you some meals over. I’m assuming that whatever’s wrong with Nate is a secret?”
“Yeah, it would be best if it didn’t get out.”
“You know everybody’s going to know eventually, but at least all those reporters and other crazies are gone.”
Tonya shook her head. She’d almost forgotten about the publicity after her disappearance. Just as Bryan predicted, once she released the statement about going to rehab everyone lost interest. Amazing. “I know, but there’s nothing I can do about it. He insisted on coming here and he had to know the risk of gossip.”
Anita nodded. “He always was stubborn. Anyway, I’m going to the market today, and I’ll pick up some food. I’m guessing your refrigerator is probably bare, as usual.”
“Thanks, Mama. I’ve been meaning to do some shopping. I appreciate your help.” They returned to the bedroom where Nate and Reuben were talking softly about sports and the SEC’s prospects for this football season. Tonya was about to heave a sigh of relief that no one had said anything untoward when Reuben spoke up.
“I assume you’re involved in some type of shenanigans.”
Shenanigans? Seriously? And who was he to talk? The man’s entire life was shenanigans. Before Tonya could interrupt, Nate answered him.
“No sir, at least not to my knowledge.”
“Well, you got hurt some kind of way. Were you doing something illegal? You’re not involved in drugs, are you? I always thought you were one of those potheads,” Reuben said gruffly.
Nate shook his head as Tonya turned to give Reuben a piece of her mind. “No sir. Not anymore. I promise you, as far as I know I haven’t broken any American laws.”
Reuben rubbed his chin. “I guess I have to be content with that. Just take care. It took her a long time to recover last time you left.”
“Reuben!” Tonya began, really about to bless him out now, but Nate grabbed her hand.
“I know. I messed up big time.”
“If you break her heart again you’ll have me to answer to, do you understand?”
Many men would’ve laughed at threats from a man of such small stature, but Nate knew better. He knew death even when it came in a flashy suit. Besides, Reuben had a good thirty years on him and what older men lacked in strength and stamina they made up for in cunning and stealth. He had no doubt the other man could take him out any time he liked. “Yes sir. I promise you I’ll never hurt her again.”
Reuben and Anita both gave him stern looks before they took their leave.
Tonya turned on Nate, fuming. “How dare he?”
Nate was calmly polishing off his breakfast. “Because he loves you. Count yourself lucky.”
Tonya had no response to that, remembering that Nate had no family, not even an unorthodox one.
“Your mama never changes, does she?” Nate said.
“Hey, she just welcomed you home. I can think of a lot worse she could’ve said.”
“Yeah, I know. I never knew she thought of me that way. What do you think she’ll say when she finds out I kidnapped you?” he said.
“She already knows. That’s why I was so worried that she’d say something ugly -- not that she needs an excuse,” Tonya said.
“Wow.”
“She always thought you were just jelly.”
“Yeah, but who knew that would extend to kidnapping?” Nate said.
“I told her you had good reasons, though I didn’t go into detail. Speaking of reasons, Deringer never really talked about it, but he did tell me the bad guy is dead...” she said.
“Dare never talks about much of anything. Yeah, the Rooster is dead.”
“I suppose you’ll be going back to work once you’re better.” She hated that questioning note in her voice, but there was nothing she could do about it. She didn’t want him going anywhere anytime soon, particularly not off to some world-class hellhole in pursuit of terrorists.
“I don’t know what I’ll do. My line of work is too damned dangerous.”
Tonya gave him a surprised look. Had being shot finally brought him to his senses? She shook her head. Probably not, after all, it wasn’t his first gunshot wound.
Nate took in her startled expression. “Not too dangerous for me. Too dangerous for you. I mean if you were found once you can be found again.”
“Oh, my God,” she whispered. She hadn’t considered that.
“Exactly. No, I think I need a new line of work, but I don’t know what that is yet.” He moved the tray off his lap and scratched at his scraggly facial hair. Deringer had just given him a shave the previous evening and he was in dire need of another.
“Well, you’ve got your degree, maybe you should look into finally using it somehow,” she said.
“I’ve thought about that. I’ve got some money saved. I might do something entrepreneurial, or maybe do some security consulting. I just don’t know yet.” He shifted uncomfortably on the bed and she moved to remove the breakfast tray. He grabbed one of her wrists, stopping her before she could leave his side with the tray. “You know, you haven’t come near me since I came back. Don’t I get some type of reward for keeping my promise?”
“Haven’t come near you? I’ve been with you every day for a week.” She turned to place the tray on the dresser.
“You know what I mean.”
Tonya sighed heavily as though greatly put-upon then gave him a playful peck on the cheek, but he grabbed both her arms and held her in place for a much longer salute. She didn’t dare move for fear of hurting his ribs, besides she wanted the kiss. Believing he was dead had been so horrible, and the long nights spent frightened out of her wits thinking Deringer would get there too late or was mistaken in his belief that Nate was alive had been even worse. Now that he was on the mend she could focus on more carnal thoughts, not that they were ever that far away anyway. Even bandaged and bruised and looking like death warmed over, he and his masculinity drew her like a hummingbird to nectar and were just as sweet. She leaned into the kiss tasting the essence of him, absorbing it into her flesh. She pulled closer to him, kneeling on the bed now as the kiss intensified. Tonya knew she should halt the caress but it felt too good, she’d thought he was dead and now his vital, breathing flesh was warming beneath her hands. Burning her, searing her with the promise of all she’d ever wanted.
Feeling his hands against her bare breasts brought Tonya to her senses. The man was wounded for crying out loud! She pulled away, grabbing his hands to halt his tantalizing touch.
“You’re in too bad a shape for that and you know it.”
“Are you kidding? It’s been weeks. If I’m ever that bad off just take a gun and blast me between the eyes, little sister.”
Tonya laughed. “Well, I’m dead tired. I doubt I’d be much fun.”
He frowned. “I’m sorry, Onion. You’re wearing yourself out. Why won’t you let anyone else take care of me? The Department -- ” he began before she interrupted him.
“Do you really think I want those creepy ass people in my house? They made you disappear once before, what’s to keep it from happening again? No, I’m perfectly capable of taking care of you. Especially now that you’re doing so much better.”
“Fine, if you insist. But what about my fish sandwich?”
* * * * *
Tonya adjusted the angle of her laptop stand so that she could lean back more in her recliner. She’d been writing for hours and the strain was beginning to wear on her lower back. A good stretch and a glass of tea seemed like a good idea. She jumped as the glass suddenly appeared on the table next to her chair. She turned and saw Nate clad only in a pair of loose fitting pajama bottoms standing next to her chair. After three weeks of convalescence he’d regained some weight, but there was still a troubling fragility about him.
He gestured toward the glass, “I see you still drink that rocket fuel to get juiced up. Looks like you’ve had a few.”
Tonya smiled and picked up the glass, which he’d placed in front of four empty ones. She could usually tell how long she’d been writing by the number of glasses she’d consumed. She stood then pausing to stretch the kink in her lower back.
“I’m sorry, have you been up long? I get in a zone when I write.”
“I remember,” he said with a faraway look in his eyes.
“Are you hungry? Do you need anything?”
“Nope. Nothing but to stay out of bed for a few minutes.”
“Nate -- ”
“I’m not going to climb the Matterhorn. I’m just sick of being cooped up.”
“Fine, you can use this chair, it should be most comfortable. Do you want a book? A magazine?”
“Nope. I just want to talk to you.”
Tonya looked down at her computer.
“Hey, I don’t want to be a bother.”
“You’re not a bother. I was pretty much done anyway. My editor will be thrilled that I’m so far along.”
He shook his head. “I don’t know how you do it. Write on a deadline like that,” he (clarified?) said after she raised a brow in inquiry.
“No, you don’t, considering that I did it for you when we were in school. I damned near flunked Chaucer for you.”
“I did flunk B. Law for you, or did you forget that I’m the only reason you survived Calculus?”
Tonya chuckled as she recalled those frantic late-night study sessions. They were probably the only couple on campus that spent a good portion of their time together actually studying. “So, it took two of us to make one good student.”
“We make one helluva pair, that’s for sure. Tell me more about writing. What are all those sticky notes for?” He gestured toward the notes that covered her laptop stand and case.
“That’s how I plot. Each sticky is a chapter and I write out what will happen on it. How did it feel when you got your first assignment?”
“You couldn’t possibly want to talk about my job.”
“Quid pro quo, Randolph. You show me yours and I’ll show you mine,” she said.
“Seems I’ve heard that one before,” he laughed then shook his head as he stared off into space for a moment. “I was terrified. Scared to death I’d screw it up,” he said with a sigh.
“But not afraid you’d be hurt or killed?”
“Not really.” He opened his mouth as though to say more then rubbed his hand over his head before he spoke again. “I was well-trained.”
“That’s not what you were about to say.”
He held up an index finger and slowly shook his head again.
Realizing he wasn’t going to say anything else she continued. “I don’t know how they train you not to fear death -- or worse.”
“They don’t. They train you to focus on the job at hand. When you do that, everything else falls into place. There’s no time for fear or worrying.”
Tonya sank down on the massive chocolate brown sofa that was at a right angle to the chair. “If anyone had asked
me back then what I thought you’d end up doing I would never have imagined anything like this. Even when you disappeared I thought -- ”
“Me neither. So what are you working on now, Diced?”
She smiled. “Yes, and no, I’m not telling you anything about it.”
“You know when I first heard you were writing books I was terrified.”
“Terrified? Of what? You didn’t fear death from a crackpot terrorist, but you were scared of me?”
“I thought you might be writing about me.”
“Thinking pretty highly of yourself, huh?”
“Well the whole Waffle House thing made me nervous. After all, we had history there.”
“I told you...”
“I know. I know you didn’t remember, but how was I to know that? I knew I’d done you wrong. I’ve heard about the ways you writers take revenge.”
“I like my revenge a little more personal. I’d never put you in a book,” she said, lying through her teeth. Martin, her lead character’s love interest was so obviously Nate even Callie had teased her about it. She was stunned he didn’t see himself. Of course, she realized now the character was the young man she’d known, not this hardened agent. Her Nate was still there, but he was irrevocably changed by his life experiences.
Shortly afterwards she noticed that he was beginning to tire and he went to bed without complaint.
Tonya slipped into bed beside Nate. He’d turned in hours before while she worked late on her manuscript. She carefully spooned him her front to his back, relaxing as she felt his comforting warmth.
“This time I was scared out of my mind.”
“What?” Tonya said, startled. She’d thought he was asleep. Why was he lying here in the dark by himself?
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