Tonic

by Heather Lloyd

  “Oh.” He is as miserable without me as I am without him.

  “Look. I know it’s a lot to ask. But Olivia. Listen to me. I’m ninety-nine percent sure that you are what is causing him to be this way. …And no, it’s not your fault. Don’t you dare feel guilty about this or I swear I will come kick your ass. He needs to figure out how to deal with being away from you. But I think a visit from you would help. He’s been talking about you coming here for vacation but didn’t know when or if you could.”

  “Yes, work had been keeping me extremely busy.”

  “Had…been?”

  “Yes, it’s slowed down to normal again. And I’ve been thinking about a little vacation overseas. And I have actually been looking at tickets. So, yes I feel comfortable about taking time off again.”

  “You’ll come?” she asks, hopeful.

  “Yes, I’ll come.”

  “Yay! Woo hoo! Thank you, thank you! I can’t wait.”

  I picture her doing a happy dance. I wonder if she is doing a happy dance.

  “Oh, I just had the best idea” Leslie says. “Don’t tell Ryan you’re coming.”

  “What?” I ask.

  “Surprise him. He’ll love it,” she says. “Well, he will hate it at first but then he’ll love it.”

  “I guess I could surprise him,” I agree. “He’ll be shocked.”

  “It will be awesome to see his face when you just show up,” Leslie laughs.

  We work it all out. I got on line and booked my plane tickets. Leslie will meet me at the airport and take me to the hotel first and then to the set where they are filming. She has already talked with the director and let him know what she was going to try to do. He told Leslie he will even pay for my plane ticket. Ryan will be working the first day I arrive, but the director will give Ryan a break the next two days.

  Later, Ryan calls. It is so hard not to say anything to him, but I keep my mouth shut. I am curious to see how he reacts, too. Plus, I am anxious to see for myself just how badly he has been behaving on set. I ask him how the filming is going. He groans and says he doesn’t want to talk about it. He says he just wants to hear my voice. To me he sounds genuinely depressed and like he is struggling with everything. I feel so sorry for him. But knowing that I will make him extremely happy in a few days – at least I hope so – I can deal with fibbing to him.

  After talking with Ryan, I call Taylor, Sarah and my parents to let them know what is going on and that I am leaving for a couple weeks. Taylor is excited for me and tells me I need to sit down with Ryan and have a serious talk about our future. My parents are excited too, but also cautious. They want me to be happy but don’t want to see me hurt again. And I can’t blame them for their concern. Everything is settled and all I have to do is pack for the trip.

  Chapter 12

  Monday afternoon, I find myself boarding a plane to London. I have an afternoon flight so I fly mainly during the night and it will be Tuesday when I arrive in London. Even though I am tired, I hardly sleep because I am so excited about seeing Ryan and surprising him. Once I land and go through customs, I spot Leslie. She is jumping up and down, waving at me. Once I get close enough, she comes running to me and gives me a massive hug.

  “I’m so glad you’re here, and not just for Ryan’s sake. I missed you, too,” she says. “I have to warn you, he’s been worse today because he’s been trying to reach you this morning. He even yelled at me because I was amused by his tantrum.”

  “I talked to him for just a little bit yesterday before I boarded the plane. Told him I wasn’t feeling well and that I was going to bed. Then I told him I wouldn’t be available today because I had meetings starting early and that they would last all day. He must have thought I’d be able to call him back in-between meetings.”

  “I can’t wait until he sees you. Just be prepared. He probably won’t let you out of his sight the whole time you’re here.”

  “I’d be ok with that.”

  She gives me a knowing smirk and we both laugh.

  Leslie helps get my luggage to a taxi. She chats while I look out the window at my first glimpses of London. I’ve always wanted to visit, just never took the time to come. We go to the hotel and dump my things in Leslie’s suite for the moment since we can’t get into Ryan’s. I freshen up and reapply my makeup so I won’t look dead to everyone. We grab a quick lunch, then finally arrive at the set.

  It is dreary and rainy, but perfect for the scene they are shooting. My heart is pounding; I am so excited to see him. We sneak into the view of the set and I am able to watch Ryan work for a while. He looks so good. I realize how much I did miss him. Leslie is right. Ryan goofs up a line and starts cursing like I’ve never heard him. I am shocked. I have never seen Ryan like this. He is so furious and upset. Some part of me is happy that I am not the only one who is miserable and depressed because we were apart.

  Leslie lets the director know I am here and as soon as he can, he says he will stop for the day. They film for about another hour. The director yells at Ryan a few times to get his head on straight. Finally, they stop. Ryan still has not seen me. He starts to stalk off by himself with his cell phone up to his ear; my phone starts vibrating. I show Leslie that he is calling again. We smile at each other. She calls out to him; he mumbles something – I think I heard Olivia and more cursing somewhere in that mumbling – but grudgingly comes over.

  When he finally spots me, his eyes widen. He has a look of disbelief on his face at first and then the biggest grin appears and his whole face lights up. He runs to me, grabs me, knocking Leslie back a few steps, wraps his arms around me and kisses me good and long, almost inappropriately. I can hear others laughing at his reaction.

  “What are you doing here?” he huffs out as soon as he takes a break. His eyes devour my face.

  I am flushed and have trouble catching my breath, but still laugh. “I came to surprise you. Surprise!”

  “I love this surprise. You look so good. God I’ve missed you so much. I love you,” he rambles and kisses me again. “I’ve been trying to call you all day.”

  “Sorry. I couldn’t answer my phone since I was on the plane. And well, since I arrived…I didn’t want to give myself away. Phone’s on vibrate. And I love you, too.”

  “How long?” he asks, his eyes burrowing into mine. “How long can you stay?”

  “A while,” I barely get out.

  “What’s a while?” he asks hopefully.

  “At least two weeks,” I reply, squeezing him and not wanting to let go either.

  “Yes,” he exclaims. Ryan picks me up, swings me around and kisses me again. Then he brushes my hair back on both sides of my face. “I can’t believe you’re here. Thank you for coming.”

  The director comes over then; Leslie introduces me. Ryan keeps his arms around me protectively and holds me close to him. The director tells Ryan he can leave and not come back until Friday – and he’d better have a much improved attitude. Ryan assures him that he will.

  The crew is going to get together to grab something to eat and drink. I suggest that we go with them, but Ryan just wants to go back to the hotel, says he just wants some quiet time with only me. I catch Leslie watching us; she looks relieved. While Ryan goes to get his things, I walk over to Leslie.

  “Thanks for calling me, telling me the truth and asking me to come over. He’s better now, right?” I ask.

  “Ohmigosh. It’s a night and day difference. His sun finally came out. I’m so glad you came.” She hesitates, then continues. “You saw what he was like before he knew you were here. Although, I’m concerned with how much you affect him. He has to be able to work through any issues and do his job. I’ve never seen him this way. I don’t know what he’s thinking or if he’s not thinking. He doesn’t want to get a bad reputation.”

  “I thought about that on the flight over. I’ll talk with him and see what’s really going on with him.”

  Ryan comes up to us then. He puts his arms around me from behind. �
�Ready to go?”

  “Yes, I’m ready. Leslie, call when you get back and I’ll come get my things.”

  Leslie says she will call and gives both of us hugs and winks at me. Ryan leads me to his car, kisses me before I get in and we are off to the hotel.

  As soon as we get into his suite and the door closes, Ryan pushes me up against the door and attacks me, not that I am complaining. I do my own attacking of him. My need for him makes me rip the buttons off his shirt because I am too impatient to unbutton them all. Clothes are strewn all over the entryway. There is nothing slow about our love making this time. Lips, tongues and teeth wrestle together. I realize as much as I like it when he takes his time and slowly draws me to the edge, I like this animal side of him, too. It seems like he just can’t go slow, like he needs me too badly now.

  He pulls me down on my knees to the floor, lays me down. As he pushes into me, he apologizes for going so fast, but he needs me desperately. He pumps faster and faster. I explode which in turn causes him to lose control and come. After he is spent, he collapses half on, half off me. We are both sweating and breathing hard from the exertion.

  I am staring up at the ceiling, grinning like a fool, when his hand nudges my head so I will turn to look at him.

  “Welcome to London, Sweetheart. I still can’t believe you’re here. You can’t know how happy your visit has made me.”

  “Well, I know how happy I am to be with you, so I kind of know. It took all my strength not to say something to you all the times we’ve talked since I made the plans to come.”

  “How long have you known?”

  “Well, Leslie called me last…let me see,” I say as I think. He raises his head and gives me a confused look.

  “Wait. Leslie called you?” he interrupts, a little confused and irritated.

  “Yes. I need to talk to you about that, too. But she called last Sunday, so I’ve known since then and not said anything.”

  “Why did Leslie call you?”

  “She called to beg me to come here for a visit. She told me how bad you were struggling thus delaying the filming.” I yawn. “Don’t be mad at Leslie. I’m glad someone finally told me what was going on.”

  “She shouldn’t have called you.”

  “No, she shouldn’t have had to, but you weren’t telling me what was going on.”

  “I didn’t want you to know how missing you, how being away from you, was affecting me. I was afraid I’d scare you. And I didn’t want you to worry about me.”

  “I think that’s my decision whether I should worry about you or not.” I yawn again. “You need to think about what kind of reputation you’re going to get if you can’t work if I’m not around. You want me to be open and honest with you; I expect the same from you.”

  “Let’s talk more about this tomorrow. You need to sleep.”

  “No. I’m fine,” I say, yawning again. “Stupid jet lag. I want to stay right here with you.”

  He gets up and picks me up, carries me to his bed.

  “Olivia. You need to sleep. I don’t need you to get sick on me. Get rested, then we can have fun together.”

  And that is all I hear before I pass out on him.

  * * *

  When I wake up, the sun is out. I look around the room now. I was a little preoccupied when I got here yesterday and then of course I passed out before I could check out the suite. The king size bed has a beautiful chocolate brown and cream comforter on it. The curtains on the sliding glass balcony doors match the bedspread. On the opposite wall from the window, there is a dark brown, 3-drawer chest of drawers. The chair and table all coordinate with the bedspread, too, with deep brown and cream strips and mahogany wood. How gorgeous. Maybe I need to copy this in my bedroom. In the chair and just in front of it are my suitcases. Ryan must have gotten them for me.

  I stretch and wonder what time it is. Ryan’s arm snakes around me and pulls me to him.

  “I love you, Olivia Sterling.”

  “I love you too, Ryan Paxton.”

  “I still can’t believe you’re here.”

  “I know. Can’t believe I’m in London. I’m so glad I came.”

  “I’ve been laying here thinking and wondering when you’re going to wake up. Debating whether I should wake you up or let you sleep. I was good and let you sleep because you’re going to need to be rested,” he grins at me. “And I’ve come to the conclusion that you can never leave.”

  “What?” I ask puzzled and wiggled my body around so I can face him.

  “You can’t leave me again. I can’t deal with you being half way around the world. As Leslie told you, and well, you saw for yourself yesterday, I was grumpy and depressed and horrible to work with.”

  “Yes, I did see that. But you have to figure out how to work well when things aren’t going as you planned in your personal life.” I gently trace my fingers over his face. “Because I do have to go back…but, not for two weeks.” I kiss his nose.

  “So you’re my prisoner for the next two weeks. And I get to do anything I want to you.”

  “Oh, no!” I fake being scared. “What are you going to do to me?”

  “Well, now. That depends on how bad you’ve been. And I think you’ve been very bad.”

  “What? I have not,” I argue.

  “Let me name some of your transgressions. Didn’t tell me you were coming to London. Wouldn’t answer your phone when I called. Went out with your friends and got hit on.”

  His hand unexpected ly comes down on my bare butt, making me jerk forward into him. He actually spanked me! I am so shocked that I can’t think of anything to say. I look at him, his eyes sparkling with mischief. I squint my eyes at him.

  “You did not just spank me.”

  “Oh yes I did.” He keeps grinning at me mischievously.

  He presses his mouth to mine; his teeth grabbing my bottom lip. But I can’t enjoy it. Nausea hits me at that inopportune time and I think I am going to throw up. As I push Ryan away, I see hurt flash across his face for just a second before confusion takes its place and run for the bathroom. I make it just in time to throw up in the toilet. Ryan is right behind me, rubbing his hand up and down my back in a soothing motion. After I am done, Ryan grabs a wash cloth, wets it and hands it to me. Then he gives me a glass of water.

  “Sweetheart, are you ok?” he asks concerned, squatting down beside me. His hand brushes the damp hair off my face.

  Still feeling weak, I lean against him. “I think I’m ok. Sorry. I’m not sure why I threw up.”

  “It’s probably just jet lag. We’ll take it easy today. Have you eaten since you got here?”

  “I had lunch with Leslie after I got here, but that’s it.”

  “So you need some food, too.”

  Ryan helps me up and we take a shower together. Since I still felt queasy, he helps me wash and rinse off. While I get ready, Ryan orders room service. After I eat some toasted bread, I feel a little better. After resting a while, I feel much better. Ryan proceeds with his plans to have me see his London.

  As we get ready to leave, there is a knock on our door. Ryan opens it and there stands Jeremy, Ryan’s bodyguard. I grin and greet him.

  We walk around the south bank of the river Thames and go on the London Eye. What a view of the city I can see from it! Awesome! Ryan takes me to an art gallery; we spend hours there. I have a wonderful, relaxing afternoon. And Ryan looks so much happier and relaxed than he did when I first arrived.

  We decide to go to dinner at a restaurant that is close to the hotel. Then we spend the evening in bed, talking and making love. I wake up to another beautiful morning. My stomach is a little upset but I don’t throw up. Maybe I got a little bug that is now working its way out of my system.

  “Good morning, Beautiful.”

  “Mmm. Morning,” I reply as I stress my arms above my head.

  “I was thinking. How would you feel if I make dinner reservations tonight for us, my brothers and their girlfriends? I can’t wait for
my family to meet you. You’ll meet mom and dad another time.”

  “Of course. I’d love to meet your brothers, and their girlfriends. What are their names again?”

  “My eldest brother, Steven, has been seeing Sophia for about a year and a half now. We’re expecting an engagement from them soon. And Jake is currently seeing a girl named Audrey, she goes by Drey. They’ve only been dating a couple weeks.”

  “I can’t wait to meet them. Do they know about me?” I am curious if he told them how serious he is about me.

  “Oh, yes,” he answers, looking a little embarrassed. “I’ve talked to my family about you. They know I love you. They might tease you a little.”

  “Tease me? About what?”

  “About being with me.”

  “OK. I don’t see what there is to tease about that. Must be a brother thing,” I said confused.

  “Yes, it is,” he confirmed. “Actually, they’ll probably tease me even more.”

  “Alright.”

  “Don’t worry about it. It’s nothing. I’ll make them behave. So, what would you like to do today? Is there something you’d like to see?”

  “I’d love to see Buckingham Palace?” It came out as a question.

  “Sure, we can do that. Let’s get going.”

  Jeremy again greets us to accompany us on our outing. Even though it is the wrong time of year to tour the palace, we have a wonderful time there. We go to St. Paul’s Cathedral and Westminster Abbey. Everywhere we go there are so many people interrupting us for pictures and autographs from Ryan. He is such a trooper. But thank goodness Jeremy is there to help us get through the crowd.

  We go back to the hotel in time to freshen up and change for dinner with Ryan’s brothers. I start getting nervous about meeting them, hoping they will like me.

  When we arrive at the restaurant, his brothers and their girlfriends are already there. Ryan, knowing I am nervous, takes my hand and gives me an encouraging squeeze and leads the way to the table.