by KT Fisher
I bet he does, I think to myself.
The now new image of Booker lying naked on his bed, the many tattoos on show, makes me hungry and not for the food in the refrigerator. I’m guessing Tate’s in bed, with a woman by the looks of the bright pink bra on the living room floor. Nice.
Wanting a shower, I make my way to my room upstairs, and as I close the door behind me my cell phone rings in my bag. It’s a blocked number, and I think for a couple of seconds whether to answer or not because I don’t like to answer blocked ID calls. So I decline and throw my phone onto my bed, removing my jacket and shoes. My cell rings again and it’s a blocked number, just like before, but I decline again. I run the shower, letting the water warm as I brush through my hair, but I hear my cell alerting me to another phone call. Before I even look at the screen, I know it’s a blocked number again. Thinking it might be an emergency, I decide to answer this time.
“Hello?” I reply, closing the door to my en-suite to cancel any noise from the shower. There’s a second of silence before ‘Chasing Cars’ by Snow Patrol begins to play down the phone and chills spread all over my entire body. I used to love this song before Troy made it our song, and then I came to hate it. It reminds me of all the bad times and what he did to me. “Hello?” I repeat, but apart from the song, there’s no noise. I begin to feel sick and scared, so I quickly hang up and turn it off before Troy can hear my cries. I don’t want to chance him calling me again. Troy used to love seeing and hearing me cry after he abused me. It was like an athlete receiving a trophy after his victory, and my cries were his reward.
Why is he torturing me? Why can’t he just let me go and live my life free of him?
You’d think he would be satisfied after everything he’s already done. I may be a stronger woman now, but Troy’s still able to undo me. When I first met him, I was not the same as I am now. My friends now see me as strong, but back then I wasn’t. I was quiet and weak, I must have been to continue to live with the shit I was handed.
Even now I think back and ask myself, why didn’t I leave him sooner?
Why did I ever stay with an abusive man?
If it wasn’t for Booker, I’m afraid I’d still be living that life, but then I laugh.
Aren’t I still scared and running away from Troy? I may not be living with him, but I’m still terrified of him and what he can do.
There was a time when I was with him that I thought he’d stopped, and he began treating me the way I believed I should be treated, that was when I’d forgive him.
What a joke! I can never ever forgive Troy. There only so many punches a woman can take before she realizes she’s worth more, and for me that realization didn’t materialize from Troy’s fists, but in the arms of Booker.
When I ran for the safety of my brother, Tate, I found Booker. His flirting and compliments made me see myself for who I really am. I saw through Troy’s lies, his insults and brainwashing. He may not know it, but Booker saved me, and I will forever be grateful for that. The way Booker looked at me, and even though he may have been sweet talking me to get into my underwear by just speaking to me in a different tone than Troy did, something inside me snapped.
Troy would always talk down to me and use a nasty tone, but Booker was always sweet and in some ways, loving. So when I returned home and reunited with Troy in the house we shared, he gave me a shit storm of a story about how he’d changed, but I heard the tone in his voice. It didn’t match Booker’s, and his eyes never looked at me adoringly like Booker’s had. Even though I accepted Troy’s apology, I didn’t believe him. It was different that time, he didn’t hit me as much, but mostly instead, he tried to emotionally hurt me by getting inside my head.
However, this time, I was more aware. I was already planning my escape because I wasn’t stupid. Knowing I couldn’t just run away as I needed money to survive, and Troy had a lot of it, so I saved little bits here and there with a goal to running away. I realized if I went home to my parents, Troy would only come after me and find me, but if I went with Tate, there was a lesser chance of him catching up with me.
I never told Troy that I was related to a rising rock star—it was before Black Inferno got their huge break—so I didn’t want to ring Tate and alert him to my struggles. As a matter of fact, I didn’t want anyone knowing what I’d been hiding and feeling sorry for me, especially not with my new found pride. It’s the reason Tate and nobody else knows about Troy, except Roxie, and if she hadn’t seen me crying that night she wouldn’t have known either.
That night. I can’t believe I went to meet him after everything he’d done. If he hadn’t threatened my brother, I wouldn’t have gotten myself upset. As soon as I showed up, I felt like the timid girl I used to be and I couldn’t have that. All he had to say was he wanted me back, and when I said I wouldn’t, he went crazy. He threatened me, my family, and my friends. He said he had connections and knew how to get to me, and that if I didn’t go with him, it would be the end of me.
His letters and now phone calls are becoming too much for me to handle, and after what Roxie had gone through with her creepy stalker Joe, I don’t know what to do. I think I should tell Tate, but if I do he might do something stupid and get himself into trouble.
If I ignore Troy, he might get the hint and leave me the fuck alone.
At least, that’s what I’m hoping.
Crystal had already gone when I woke up and I don’t know how to feel about that. I’m a little pissed because I wanted to impress her with some breakfast, but she hasn’t given me a chance. The first thing I did this morning was check in on her, after last night I didn’t know how it would be between us. It was fucking hot, but I don’t want to ruin our friendship. I would rather be Crystal’s friend than not be in her life at all. However, when I approached the room she slept in, the door was already open, and it was empty. The bed wasn’t made, which actually made me laugh. Messy bitch. As I stepped inside, I could smell her sweet scent and breathed her in. If only she wasn’t my friend’s little sister and we hadn’t had sex, he might just forgive me, but we’ve gone too far. We haven’t slept together for a while, probably around a year, but that doesn’t mean I’ve forgotten about her. I think about Crystal every day, and I’m not even sure I know what that means.
I get ready, and by the time I’ve showered and dress I notice I have a text. It’s from Tate, and he’s asking about Crystal. Reading his text, I discover he stayed out last night and can’t get hold of his sister. Frowning, I dial her number and it goes straight to voicemail. Her phone has most likely died, but I still put on my boots and make my way to Tate’s. Deciding to walk because it’s a beautiful day and Tate’s place is only ten minutes away, I think how much Crystal can’t enjoy living with her brother. Seeing him with girls and returning from his late nights of fucking, it’s got to be awkward as hell.
Maybe she would prefer moving in with me? Or I could, at least, offer her the room for whenever she needs a break from the house. Somehow, I don’t think she’ll take me up on my offer, though.
I key in the code to Tate’s private gates and knock on the door. There’s no answer, so I knock again, and when Crystal doesn’t open the door, I decide to let myself in. I have my own key, but it’s not needed because the damn door is open.
“Crystal!” I shout, my voice echoing through the house.
“Book?” I hear her voice floating down from the top of the stairs. She’s standing in tiny jean shorts and a tight black shirt, her long bright red hair falling down either side of her shoulders. “What are you doing here?”
Her voice sounds off, and I notice her eyes look a little red. “What’s the matter?”
Crystal stands stiff. “Nothing.” She begins to walk down the stairs, not giving me any eye contact, but it’s no use because I know she’s been crying. “Why are you here?”
“I came to see you. Tate can’t get through to your phone and neither can I.”
Crystal snaps her face toward me. “Tate’s upstairs.�
� She frowns.
“No, he’s not,” I correct her. “He’s on his way home, though, but he’s worried he can’t call you.”
Crystal’s eyes dart around the place. “I thought he was here.”
“Is everything okay?” I ask, reaching out to touch her arm, but she flinches. “Has something happened?”
“No…” she shakes her head, “…my cell died, that’s all.”
The house phone rings, and she physically jumps. Her eyes are wide again, and she’s biting damn hard on her lip. “Crystal?”
“Can you get the phone?” she asks, sounding a little shaky.
“Sure.” I nod. I don’t care what she says, there’s something definitely wrong and I don’t like it. Watching her carefully as I walk across the room, Crystal is watching me just as hard. “Hello?” I answer the phone.
“Booker?” I hear Tate’s voice.
“Yeah, I’m here,” I answer, and I don’t know if I’m seeing things but I’m pretty sure Crystal looks relieved. “I came to check on her. Seems her cell has died.”
“The fuck?” he shouts. “I’m fucking panicking and it’s all because she didn’t charge her cell? I’ve been ringing this phone, too. What’s her excuse on that?”
“She stayed at mine last night,” I admit and there’s a silence.
“What?” he asks.
“Don’t worry, bro, nothing happened.”
There I go, lying to him again.
Crystal’s eyes widen at my confession. She’s shaking her head and walking around in circles.
“I’m nearly home,” is all he says before hanging up.
“Why did you say that?” she asks. “He didn’t know I stayed over, and there was no need to tell him.”
“I can’t lie about everything, Crys.” I laugh, although I don’t find anything funny.
Crystal stomps into the kitchen, flicking on the coffee maker and folding her arms as she waits. She looks over at me and frowns. “It’s fine, you can leave now.”
“What’s the matter?” I ask, stepping closer. “Is this because we kissed?”
“No,” she whispers.
“Then what?” I ask.
“It’s nothing,” she urges, but I’m not buying it.
“This to do with your ex?” I ask, and as soon as I ask her, I know I have it right. Her body slightly flinches, it’s a small movement but totally caught it.
“No,” she answers, but her face has paled in the seconds since I asked the question, and this close to her I can see she’s, in fact, been crying.
“Bullshit,” I snap. “What they fuck has he done to make you cry?”
“He hasn’t.” She turns away from me, but I reach for her arm and pull her back, spinning her around to face me.
“Don’t lie to me, Crystal,” I plead. “I want to help.”
“Then leave it.” She pushes away and I hear the front door open. Tate’s home.
“I won’t,” I whisper as I walk past her, exiting the kitchen. I see Tate entering, looking like a fucking mess. “Good morning.”
“Yeah,” he grumbles and Crystal appears from the kitchen, quickly glancing from me to Tate. “Crystal…” Tate speaks, not sounding at all happy. Crystal ignores him, though, and takes herself and her cup of coffee upstairs. Tate looks to me in question, but I shrug, shaking my head. “I’m going to bed,” Tate grumbles, slapping me on the back as he passes.
I exit the house, feeling angered that Crystal’s ex affects her like this. He shouldn’t be making her cry. I know Roxie told me to be careful, but I’m not having her mistreated by some dick who she left. She obviously wants nothing to do with him, so why isn’t he leaving her the fuck alone?
I want to help her and I will.
The rest of the day, I spent locked in my room, binging on movies and box sets until I fall asleep. When I wake the next day, I’m desperate to get out. Luckily for me, Lacey sends a text to let me know they’re all going Roxie’s and I eagerly reply that I’ll be coming.
Another blessing is that I don’t have to go by Booker’s place to get to Mason and Roxie’s house. But I walk quickly anyway, I don’t want another lecture from Booker anytime soon. I can’t take it, I was so close to admitting everything about Troy before Tate walked through the door. I don’t want anyone knowing what he put me through.
As I arrive at the gates of the house, Mason’s exiting and he stops to let me by. “Joining the party?”
“And you aren’t?” I laugh, stepping inside the high metal guarded gates. This estate was secure before we met Lacey and Roxie, but after what went down with Joe and his twisted ways, the guys doubled the security. Especially when little Quinton was born. We cannot afford for anything like that to happen again, which is why I think I should tell everyone about Troy. Roxie kept it quiet, and then once she realized it, it was too late. Maybe I should ask her advice?
“No.” Mason laughs. “I’m going to Cole’s. I’ve had my share of girly chatter.”
This makes me laugh. While the band are recording their new album, Mason didn’t want to leave Roxie all alone with baby Quin, so Paige offered to say over and help. Only that turned into her moving in, and I suppose it’s fair because both Paige and Ria were staying at Cole’s place. Seeing as Paige is related to Roxie, it only seems right that she stay with them, but I don’t think Mason appreciates that. We say our goodbyes and go our separate ways.
I don’t bother knocking because they know I’m coming. “Hello?” I call out as I enter.
“In here,” I hear Paige shout and walk toward the front room.
All the girls are here, including a stranger. “Hi,” I greet.
“Crystal,” Roxie greets, getting up and holding me tightly. She’s worried about me, and this is why I don’t want to tell everyone else, they’ll all feel sorry for me and see me as a victim.
I do not want that.
Roxie then guides me to the seat beside her on the sofa and looks to the girl I don’t know. Her hair is the color of fire, and I find it odd because red hair as natural as ours is rare. Her eyes are green and her skin pale. “This is Lola,” Roxie introduces.
“Hey Lola, I’m Crystal.” I nod.
“Hey...” she smiles, “…I see Roxie is collecting redheads.”
“Yeah, it looks that way.” I laugh.
Roxie rolls her eyes at our joke and the rest of the girls laugh along with us.
“I met Lola around a year ago,” Roxie adds, and I notice an edge to her voice.
“Wait…” I jump in, “…Lola is the one who brought you home that night?” I ask.
Roxie nods and Lola looks between us piecing it all together. “This is why I came, to check in on you Roxie, but I didn’t know that the night we met was the night Joe…” She lets her sentence drop away, but we all know where it leads. The night Lola and Roxie met, was the night Joe took advantage of Roxie.
“He was waiting for me,” Roxie whispers.
“I should have stayed with you,” Lola cries.
“No.” Roxie shakes her head. “We didn’t know he was there, and you practically walked me right up to the tour bus. I told you to go home.” Roxie places a hand on Lola’s shoulder. “I’m glad you weren’t there because I’m afraid it could have been worse if you were. He was on something that night, I’m sure.”
“It isn’t an excuse.” Lacey frowns. “He still hurt you.”
“I know it’s not.” Roxie smiles.
“Let’s not talk about this now,” I cut in. “Joe’s gone, and will never trouble Roxie or any of us again.”
Roxie gives me a truly happy smile. Nobody needs to be reminded of that, and besides, all this talk is making me think of Troy.
“One thing I do remember is how much you spoke about Mason.” Lola smirks. “I’m so glad you’re together again. I felt like I knew the both of you that night.” She laughs.
“Men.” Roxie shakes her head. We laugh a little, but the reality of that time for Roxie was terrible. Roxie’s smile
fades and I feel bad as she is taken back to her past memories.
The sounds of baby Quin stirring from the baby monitor clutched in Roxie’s hand interrupts, and she rushes upstairs. Once Roxie is far enough away, Lola then looks to the rest of us.
“How’s she doing?” she asks, and right then I gain some respect for her. She seems to care about our shared friend.
“A lot better,” Lacey answers. “Quin and Mason are a big reason for her staying on the straight and narrow.”
“And you guys…” Lola smiles around at us, “…I can see you’re more like family than friends.”
“We’ve been through a lot together.” I nod.
“Yeah, I caught all of that from the news.” Lola frowns. “I remembered Roxie right away and I was worried.”
“It’s good of you to catch up,” Lacey adds.
Roxie then walks in with Quin in her arms, and we all turn into mush at his cuteness. Roxie then sits down again, introducing Lola to her son.
“Oh, he’s just adorable.” Lola fusses him, and after a little while, the conversation turns to the guys. “I was so shocked that Mason was, in fact, the Mason from Black Inferno.” Lola laughs.
“You should hear our story.” Lacey smiles.
“Oh well, now I have to know,” Lola begs.
“Lacey and I met the guys in a club, and we didn’t know who the hell they were,” Roxie answers.
“Not a clue?” Lola asks, looking shocked.
“Nope.” Lacey laughs. “We were dating rock stars and we were clueless. Ria and Paige were the ones to tell us.”
“Yeah, Lace took it worse than me.” Roxie shakes her head, and Lacey rolls her eyes.