Leaving Alex to follow, laughing as he did, Derek grabbed a shot from the shot girl, downing the liquid courage quickly. He approached Starbucks Girl from behind. Leaning in close to her ear and speaking before she realized he was there. "I see you have recovered nicely from your fall and consequential molestation of my body." He tried for seductive but was sure, desperate nerd came out.
Starbucks Girl must not like people in her personal space, because she whirled around so fast he thought her head was going to spin right off. In the process though, her elbow met his nose in a fast hard hit sending him backwards. He tried to catch himself, but gravity was a cruel bitch. He landed on the table behind him, sending drinks flying.
"What the fuck?” Barked the guy whose table, he had just made a landing pad. Suddenly, Derek was on his feet, courtesy of What the Fuck Guy is yanking him up by his white dress shirt. "Do you have a problem, man?" Great he had to land on steroid boys' table.
"Dude, chill. Clumsy Barbie over there all but broke his nose simply turning around. If you are going to blame anyone, blame her." Alex interjected, failing in his attempt not to laugh. “Isn't that right, sweetheart?" Oh, no! Alex should have just let him take the punch and kept his mouth shut because now What the Fuck Guy was still holding tight to his shirt, deciding if he was telling the truth or not and Starbucks Girl looked as though she was going to do more than break Alex's nose.
"What did you just call me? Clumsy Barbie?" Fire lit her eyes as she stood going toe to toe with Alex. Was it wrong that Derek was turned on by that look in her eyes? Laughing, What the Fuck Guy dropped his fist from Derek's shirt, turning to watch the show. Straightening his shirt Derek grabbed the ice wrapped in a bar towel from the waitress. Thanking her, he ordered the table another round and himself a beer, then joined the other guy to watch this small spit fire verbally bitch slap Alex for a bit. Maybe coming to the bar was not such a bad idea after all.
***
"I don't know what mental institute you just escaped from, nor do I care. Let me give you a tip though, 'clumsy Barbie' is not a charming nickname women like to hear. Nor is being called 'sweetheart' by some Neanderthal in a suit" At this point Roni's hands were in the conversation just as much as her mouth. With a final scowl, she turned to her obsession. “I don’t even know what to say.”
"That was awesome women never talk to him like that. They always fall at his feet drooling." Starbucks Boy was laughing almost hysterically along with the walking ad for steroids standing next him. "Dude, I really am sorry about the table."
"No worries, we got a show out of the deal. And you lady, are fire on heels, I would never mess with you."
Stunned by the words from Steroid Boy, Roni simply nodded her thanks. "I swear I am not trying to hurt you. It was a reaction, you surprised me." Roni was once again standing in front of Starbucks Boy apologizing to him. Chancing a look at his blue eyes, she says what she hoped was forgiveness. "I see the waitress brought you some ice, can I get you anything else? I am sure I have some Tylenol in my purse, or a tampon to stop the bleeding." She reached for her purse. Seeing the look of horror on Izzy's face, she realized what she had just uttered. Turning too fast again, in an attempt to explain that athletes used tampons for the same purpose, she swung her purse at the same moment he leaned over to grab his beer, smacking him once again. Roni wondered if she wished hard enough, a crack would appear in the floor to swallow her up. She waited, nope, no crack. "I know I keep having to say this but are you ok? I am so so so sorry. My clumsiness usually only takes me out not the people around me." Her eyes were as wide a saucers at this point, intently fixated on him. He was quiet, too quiet. Great he was probably going to call the cops on her for assault. Why not, she had already been fired for that charge, she could see herself ending up in jail for it too. Her day was getting worse by the minute.
Starbucks Boy was doubled over. "You look like you’re in pain, let me at least take you to the ER." Roni frantically spoke, feeling worse by the moment. "I’ll just get my purse, hold on one second." Before she could move his hand flew up to grab her wrist.
"No, please don't! Just sit, don't move." His voice was gruff but his eyes danced with amusement. "Let's just find a table and sit, maybe have a drink?" He smiled behind the ice pack.
"Sure, that sounds..."
"You’re an asshole!!!" Turning to the sound of Izzy's voice she watched her friend slap, as hard as she could, Starbucks Boys' friend. That was quite a feat considering the height difference between the two. "Seriously, you should never ever be allowed out of your house without a trained nurse or a larger dose of your medication!” Izzy glared up at the man pushing her glasses up her nose. "You asshat are the reason women hate men. I don't even know your real name and I am ready to jump on the hate Suit Boy bandwagon. So take your frat house attitude shove it up your ass and leave me the fuck alone!” Ending her rant, Izzy looked over at Roni, giving a nod toward the door. She grabbed her purse and pushed past the speechless man and out the door.
"Wow, I have never heard her curse that much in such a short period of time.” Roni shook her head turning back to Starbucks Boy. “Rain check, looks like our friends can't play nice." Roni smiled apologetically at him. Carefully grabbing her purse, not wanting to hurt him again. She began to follow Izzy out the door. She did, however push his friend for good measure as she left the bar. Starbucks Boy was still that, her no name obsession.
***
Derek wanted to punch Alex, for the second time that day, but it looked as though the cute brunette already did a number on him. Her small hand print perfectly preserved on his cheek. Derek can only imagine what landed his friend in this predicament. “I can’t take you anywhere! You were talking to her friend for what, two minutes? How could you possibly have pissed her off that bad in such a short period of time?” Derek’s hand was still holding the ice to his bloody nose his other hand flailing about. “Damn it, Alex! I didn’t even get her name…. AGAIN.” Derek had gone from amused pissed to full on pissed at Alex as he realized that his chance with Starbucks Girl was gone.
“Dude, relax, you’ll see her at Starbucks. Plus her friend over reacted, I was just joking around. Not my fault that girl has no sense of humor.” Alex pauses, a devilish smile crossing her face, “Great ass though. Grabbing it was totally worth the slap”
“You grabbed her ass? What part of ‘go to the other side of the bar or shut the fuck up’ was unclear to you? If her friend hates you, I have no shot. That’s how girls work. They have that pack loyalty thing going on. Since you ruined my night with Starbucks Girl, you’re buying. I think I have expensive taste tonight,” Derek looked at back at the table he had knocked over, “and my new friends, aka the random strangers that did not chase away Starbucks Girl, are drinking on my tab too. Or should I say your tab.” Derek smiled, thinking he was clever to punish Alex by making him hang out with a group of guys instead of chasing tail. His mood was improving. “Now run along and get our new friends and me a few shots and beer chasers, to start with.”
“This is bullshit man!” Alex exclaimed as he stormed off to the bar.
“No man this is retribution!” Derek laughed, taking a seat with What the Fuck Guy and his buddies.
“You’re a cruel man, but who am I to complain when we are reaping the benefits.” What the Fuck Guy laughed, slapping Derek on the back. “I’m Collin by the way, this is Gavin, Roc and that’s Phin.”
”I’m Derek, and our host for the evening,” Derek chuckled, waving his hand over his shoulder in the general direction of the bar, “is Alex.”
“Man, your buddy must have a real talent with the women. Even I’ve never been slapped that fast.” Gavin laughed from across the table.
A few minutes later, Alex returned with a tray of drinks. “Here assholes, thanks to Slap Girl deeming me asshole of the year, the waitress is refusing to bring us drinks. Women they always stick together.” He grumbled with a huff.
“Well then you can play waitress all night.” De
rek announced with a smile. Earning him a laugh from his new conspirators. This night may end ok after all, at Alex’s expense of course.
Chapter Three
Roni lay awake in her bed, glancing at her alarm clock. If she still had her job at Douche Bags R Us, this would be the time she got up. She would dress for perfection, fix her hair and makeup so she looked stylish and sexy. Spend extra time finding the perfect outfit.
None of her efforts would be for the office. It would be for the five minutes at Starbucks when maybe, just maybe, her obsession would notice her. Well, she sure had gotten him to notice her no. Almost sending him to the ER twice in the process. Ugh! Her life was suddenly something out of a sitcom. Only nothing was going to be solved in thirty short minutes. Sighing, she decided to get on with her day.
She would give Starbucks a try, at the very least she could take her laptop and start her search for a new job, at the most (and she was crossing her fingers that she would get the most) she would see Starbucks Boy. If she sat in the corner, she could ogle him without him seeing her. After all, if he sees her, he might decide to sue her assault or something. Twice over.
One last inward sigh, Roni headed to the bathroom to get ready. Thirty minutes later she was dressed casually in skinny jeans and a form fitting sweater. Hair and makeup done to perfection (or as close as she could get, just in case Starbucks Boy didn’t want to sue her). Grabbing her laptop bag and purse, she headed out the door.
Roni typed nervously on her laptop. Trying to focus on updating her resume, and not on the clock. 7:15, he was never late. He always walked through the door at exactly 7:00. She sighed. Guess the impression she left on him was so spectacular that he decided to switch Starbucks or have his morning caffeine fix at home.
Deciding that she ruined any change she had with Starbucks Boy, she blew out a long breath. Squaring her shoulders, she dove into updating her resume and applying for jobs. A task she dreaded but at least one that would take her mind off of hot muscular men with great hands. Another sigh and she went back to work on her resume.
Roni spent the next hour in the job hunting zone, applying for one job after the other. Downing, way too much caffeine in the process. She was all but twitching. That is when she looked up to see none other than Starbucks Boy. Although he looked a little rough. He was unshaven, dressed casually instead of his normal tailored suit, and sunglasses covering his eyes. She blinked up at him not wanting to move a muscle out of fear she may somehow injure him. “Mind if I share the table? The place is filled today.” He asked, smiling down at her, and wincing slightly at the movement of his face.
“Please have a seat.” Roni gestured to the chair across from her. Either he really had nowhere else to sit or she hadn’t made as bad of an impression as she thought. She smiled to herself in the hope blooming inside her.
Starbucks Boy sat down, attempting another smile. “Thanks…um, sorry about my buddy last night. Your friend was right, he should not be out in the general population.”
“Did he tell you what he said? Izzy, my slap happy friend, wouldn’t tell me a thing. Only that he was every bad male stereotype rolled up into one super asshole. Her words, not mine” Roni laughed. Starbucks Boy winced and held his temple at her laugh, not the reaction she wanted. Then it dawned on her why he looked the way he did. She looked him up and down, noticing that his nose was bruised. She crossed her arms over her chest. Giggling to herself. “So how much did you and Super Asshole drink last night? You look like life in general hurts today?” She couldn’t help the smile on her face.
Laughing, and wincing Derek answered her. “Yeah, we may have had a few too many. Alex, as punishment for running you off, was both waitress and host last night. So myself and the table of guys you knocked me into,” he paused to send her an amused smile, “may have overindulged in some really pricey liquor and kept Alex running all night, and away from any other women. So to answer your questions, yes, life in general hurt a lot today.” He smiled and rubbed his temples. “What are you working on?”
“My resume and applying for jobs.” She groaned. “My least favorite thing to do.”
“Well, I am sure something will come your way. CP Security Technology is hiring I hear. You should check out their website.” He stated without looking at her, which was odd.
“Thanks, I will check them out.” He leaned over and pulled out his own laptop out of his messenger bag and they worked in silence for a bit. Both trying to decide what to what to say next. The large amount of caffeine running through her system combined with her nervous reaction to the gorgeous man sitting across from her made her a twitching mess. She simply had to say or do something. “Hey, since you’re here,” she cleared her throat, “I really am sorry for knocking you over and then almost breaking your nose. Usually my clumsiness doesn’t take out the people around.” She offered him a shy smile.
“So falling down a flight of stairs is a common occurrence for you?’ Starbuck Boy asked raising a disbelieving eyebrow at her.
Roni laughed, “Oh, you have no idea. I have been known to trip over air. Hell, I am so used to bumping into thing and tripping over things at this point that I don’t even notice. I wake up with bruises having no idea how I got them.” Ok, she knew she was babbling, but caffeine had replaced the blood in her body making her twitchy.
“I can honestly say I have never met anyone who didn’t know how they got a bruise. How do you make it through the day without serious injury? From what I have seen your clumsiness could be a superpower.” He laughed.
She smiled, laughing along with him. “Sure, I could be Super Clumsy Barbie.”
***
Derek was beyond relieved to know that Alex’s dumbass behavior didn’t completely ruin his chance with Starbucks Girl. Derek smiled. “Don’t ever say that in front of Alex, he will call you that forever.”
“So does your friend make a habit of getting hit by strange women? Is it some kind of fetish?” She smirked.
Derek’s booming laugh filled the café, he winced at his own noise. “No, last night was a record for him. Usually it isn’t until the next morning when he is sneaking out without even so much as a goodbye that he becomes physically injured.” Derek shook his head at the memories of college and how by the time they graduated 90% of the female population hated Alex. Most even hated Derek just for being associated with the prick.
“His Super Asshole powers must have been magnified by the full moon or something. I have never seen Izzy hit anyone.” Starbucks Girl looked past him as though trying to think of what Alex the Asshole could have said to yield such a reaction from her small friend.
“Well, whatever words were exchanged, Alex is being very hush hush about the entire thing. Which is odd, he would tell a perfect stranger the most intimate details of his life.” Now Derek had to find out what transpired between the two of them. “So what’s your plan for the day?”
“Ummm, well, umm, I hadn’t really thought past getting my resume done. “ She suddenly looked nervous and excited all at the same time.
Just as Derek was going to ask her to lunch, two things happened simultaneously. His cell phone rang with the distinct ring tone of his administrative assistant and Roni’s bouncing knee hit the table causing her to jump. He watched the chain reaction as though it was in slow motion. Roni hit her knee, she leaned forward to grab said knee, her elbow connecting with his latte, the latte launching into his laptop, the laptop sputtering and shutting down. Then, although way too late, she reached to save the laptop from the latte knocking her hot tea right into his lap. “Holy, shit!” He screamed, jumping up. Now they had the entire café’s attention that was for sure. “What?” He barked into the perpetually ringing phone while trying to save his balls from boiling.
“Oh my God! Oh my God! I am so sorry, what is wrong with me, I hurt you every time you are near me.” She started babbling, while dabbing furiously with a small napkin at his demolished laptop. If he was not in fear for his favorite body part being bu
rned, he would have thought it was adorable.
“Mr. Callaway, are you there?” His annoying assistant whispered on the other end.
“Yes, Jemma, what do you need? I told you I was taking the day off and only to bother me if it was an emergency.” He all but growled into the phone. He will never know why he hired her she was too meek, for the position and way too quiet when she spoke. Although, her organizational skills made up for her lack of backbone.
“Yes, sir. I know, but it is an emergency. I have to leave, my mother is ill and I have to fly home right now. I will be back as soon as I can but I have to leave now.” Jemma was crying by the end of the sentence. Well, didn’t he feel like his title should be Super Asshole.
“Jemma I am so sorry, yes, go take care of your family.” He said in his most empathetic voice.
“Thank you sir, I will be back in the office just as soon as I can. I will leave notes on what needs to be done and your calendar is up to date. HR can bring in a temp I am sure. Thank you again for understanding.” With that, she hung up.
Great he had a huge launch in a few weeks and needed an assistant to keep him organized. Without Jemma he would never remember to go to meetings. Then a large smile broke across his face as an idea formed. Yes, this could work. Shoving the phone into his pants, forgetting the trashed laptop. He smiled at Starbucks Girl. “So have you ever been an assistant before?” She stopped wiping up her mess and looked up at him like he was suddenly nuts.
“Yes, I was an administrative assistant in my last job for the accounting department. I have never been an executive assistant though.” She chewed on her lower lip, adorable he thought.
“Well then we can solve both of our problems with one shot. I need an assistant, at least temporarily, and you need a job. You’re hired” He beamed at her.
Falling Into You (Geek to Chic) Page 2