Maureen McKade

by A Dime Novel Hero

  “What if I want to put him to bed every night? You expect me to ride out here every day, then ride back after dark?”

  “You certainly can’t live here.”

  Jake snorted. “I thought you didn’t care about your reputation.”

  Her blush deepened to scarlet. “I don’t, but…”

  He crossed his arms. “But what?”

  She pressed her spectacles up on her nose, and defiance sparked her tightly drawn features. “It wouldn’t be right.”

  He clenched his teeth, his jaw muscle flexing. Should he bring up the ranch loan? If she didn’t pay her mortgage, it would be she who wouldn’t belong there, not him. It would be her breaking society’s rules, not him. It would be her all alone, not him.

  Guilt pierced Jake’s stubborn wrath. He didn’t want to relegate her to living the lonely life she’d known as a child. For all her deceit, Jake didn’t want to shred her tattered reputation any more than it had been by the gos-sipmongers of Chaney. And he had taken her virginity. She hadn’t lied about that.

  Her steady gaze remained unflinching, her lips thinned to a grim line. She resembled a she-cat protecting her young, ready to attack at the slightest provocation. He admired her grit; her bookish appearance had fooled him into thinking she’d back down.

  Kit was Johnny’s mother—if not by blood, then by love—and she didn’t want to leave her son as his mother had left him. He admired her for that while at the same time wanting to damn her for keeping Johnny from him.

  Kit relinquished her glare and picked up her cup. Studying him silently, she leaned against the counter and sipped her coffee. Although she appeared calm and resolute, Jake spotted a fluttery pulse point in her neck.

  He considered his options the way he would approach a client’s defense. With any luck, the ranch would be his in a short time and he would legally move into the house he’d grown up in. Johnny wouldn’t even have to leave the only home he’d known. But there still remained the problem of Kit.

  Without her, Johnny would be miserable. Jake couldn’t do that to his son. The only way to ensure Johnny had both his parents would be for Jake to marry Kit.

  Having seen his parents’ failed marriage, he hadn’t planned on falling into the same trap. He breathed deeply to dispel the suffocating impact.

  Unbidden, the memory of Kit holding the kitten in the barn surfaced. He remembered her gentleness with the tiny creature, and the way the lantern’s light had bathed her hair with a golden halo. He had thought it an angel’s halo.

  In spite of her duplicity, he wouldn’t be able to look at himself in the mirror if he cast Kit out of the home she’d worked so hard to possess. Infinitely worse would be the loss of her son.

  As he considered marrying Kit, the idea didn’t disturb him as much as it originally had. Of course, he’d already tasted her charms and knew she’d be able to assume her wifely duties. And enjoy them.

  Warming to his plan, he had to admit marriage wouldn’t be such a bad trade-off. She’d remain Johnny’s mother, and Jake would have her to himself every night.

  Because he could no longer trust her, the marriage bed would be the only thing they shared.

  He glanced at Kit. “I think I’ve come up with a solution to our problem.”

  She tipped her head to the side, a lone curl straying across her creased forehead. Wariness crept into her eyes. “What’s that?”

  “Marry me.”

  Chapter 15

  Jake Cordell slicked back his thick, autumn-touched hair and slapped bay rum on his neck. Squaring his hat on his head, he picked up a small black velvet box. He flicked open the container’s lid and gazed down at the glittering diamond, a token of his love for the woman he would spend the rest of his life with.

  “For richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, ’til death do us part,” Jake quoted softly.

  He’d made his decision. No more would he strap on the instrument of death around his hips. No more would he risk his life against murderous outlaws. No more would he be alone.

  His heart swelled with an emotion he’d lived without for most of his thirty-one years. No matter what hardships came upon them, Jake knew he and his bride would face them together; side by side for all time. She who knew him as no other woman did and who gazed at him with loving adoration…

  From this moment forward, he’d be her hero alone.

  Kit stared at Jake’s emotionless mask. He’d proposed marriage the way she proposed a horse deal. She, however, displayed more enthusiasm to a prospective buyer.

  Hurt indignation swelled in Kit, igniting her temper. “The hell I will.”

  Surprise flickered in his eyes, then he narrowed his gaze. “Before you turn me down, think of Johnny. What would he think if his father and mother got married and he had a real family?”

  Kit knew Johnny’s response: he’d be overjoyed. “That’s not fair!”

  A scowl curled his upper lip. “Life isn’t fair. Besides, you’re the one telling me to think of Johnny, to think how all this will change his life. If you marry me, it’s going to be a lot easier on him.”

  “And if I say no?”

  His expression turned to stone. “Then I take Johnny with me.”

  Kit spun away from Jake to stare unseeing out the small kitchen window. To be Mrs. Jake Cordell had been a childish dream she’d clung to for years, but not this way. Not without Jake’s love. How could she marry him, knowing the marriage was a sham, a blackmail scheme she’d agreed to only to stay with her son?

  Closing her eyes against waves of anguish, Kit lamented she had no choice. She would remain Johnny’s mother, but she wouldn’t have Jake’s heart. And if she became Jake’s wife, she also relinquished all rights to her ranch to him. Surprisingly, that didn’t bother her. She loved the ranch, but deep down she’d always thought of it as Jake’s. One of the reasons she’d bought it was to ensure Jake’s son would inherit the Cordell home.

  But what of Charlie, Ethan, and Pete? This was their home as well. If she agreed to his plan, she had to make sure her friends would have a place here if they wanted to stay.

  If she accepted his proposal, it wouldn’t be much different than the way she and Johnny lived now. Surely Jake expected her to be a wife in name only. He’d made his disgust for her obvious. She swallowed her disappointment and was angry at herself for her treasonous reaction.

  She forced herself to think of Johnny. How would Jake explain he was Johnny’s real father? Would the five-year-old understand? Or would it lead to more questions, questions Kit feared to answer?

  Turning slowly, Kit met Jake’s rock-steady gaze. “I have some conditions.”

  Suspicion lit his maple-colored eyes. “What are they?”

  Kit scrubbed her damp palms across her trouser-clad thighs. “What do you plan on doing about Charlie, Ethan, and Pete?”

  Jake shrugged. “As far as I’m concerned, they’ll continue working here like they’ve always done. I plan on keeping my law office for a little while, and I’ll need some men I can trust to take care of the horses.”

  Gratitude tightened Kit’s chest. “Good, that was one of my conditions. This is their home.” She took a deep breath. “And I don’t want you to tell Johnny about Maggie.”

  “Why?”

  “It’ll be confusing enough for him when you tell him you’re his father. When he’s older, he’ll understand the situation better.”

  A muscle flexed in his jaw. “All right.”

  Kit sighed in relief as she nodded. Only one problem remained: the mortgage on the ranch. Unwilling to deceive him any further, she wanted to have everything in the open between them. If she had been honest when Jake had arrived home, maybe things would’ve worked out differently.

  “There’s one more thing,” she said.

  “What’s that?”

  “If we marry, the ranch becomes yours,” she began.

  Jake’s features became like marble, his eyes curtained to hide his thoughts. “That’s right.�
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  She swallowed the pride blocking her throat. “In ten days, the mortgage comes due. It’s five hundred dollars, and I only have two hundred. I’m not proud of the fact that I don’t have the money, but you have a right to know what you’re getting into.”

  An unidentifiable emotion flickered across Jake’s face, and he looked down at the floor, hiding his expression. Kit’s palms grew moist from nervousness. His estimation of her must have taken another steep plunge.

  Raising his head, Jake met her eyes with a steadfast gaze. “I’ve got some money saved from my bounty hunting. The mortgage’ll get paid.”

  Both elated and humiliated, Kit didn’t know how to respond. “All right.” The only secret she harbored was her identity as T. K. Thorne. She looked at his flinty expression and her courage failed her. “I guess that’s it, then. I’ll marry you.”

  “When?”

  She shrugged, surrendering to the inevitable. “Whenever you want.”

  “Sunday.”

  Shock robbed Kit of her voice for a moment. “That’s in four days!”

  He nodded. “The sooner we get married, the sooner I can start being a father to my son.”

  Although his voice was steady, Kit could hear regret echo in his tone. He’d already lost five years with Johnny; Kit couldn’t deny him any longer.

  “We’ll have to talk to the minister,” she stated.

  “Tomorrow morning we’ll go visit with him. Where’s Johnny?”

  Kit hesitated a moment. “Pete took him fishing down at the creek.”

  Jake’s expression grew pensive. “My father took me fishing a couple of times. Those were the only times I really felt like he cared for me a little.” He started, as if he’d revealed too much. “I want to take Johnny fishing, and I want him to remember those times after he grows up.”

  Kit resisted the urge to touch him, to assure him he would be a good father. She turned toward the door. “I’ll take you to him.”

  She led him out of the house, and they walked in strained silence through the trees. At the edge of the clearing, Jake paused and clasped Kit’s wrist, halting her. “I’ll tell him we’re getting married.”

  She remained silent a moment, seeing anxiety in his eyes. “Do you want me to?”

  He seemed to ponder her question. “We’ll both tell him.”

  Hope flickered in Kit’s breast. He’d said we. Maybe there was a chance Jake would come to care for her like a real husband. Pleased by his concession, she smiled. “Good idea.”

  His features eased as a smile ghosted his lips.

  Jake glanced down at his hand, which banded Kit’s slender wrist. He liked touching her. He admired her courage in standing up to him for the sake of her friends, instead of trying to ease her own plight. But it was her divulging the news about the ranch’s mortgage and her inability to pay it that had nearly shattered his resolve. He’d been certain she’d hide that from him, as she’d hidden Johnny’s identity.

  Confused by her candor, he didn’t know what to think of Kit. This time she’d been honest. This time it was him keeping the secret.

  He released her reluctantly, and they crossed the remaining distance to the creek’s high bank.

  “Hi, Mr. Cordell,” Johnny hollered, scrambling to his feet.

  Pete rose also and laid a firm hand on the boy’s shoulder, holding him back protectively. Jake glanced at Kit, who sent the gray-haired Indian a nod. Pete removed his hand, his creased face relaxing. Had Kit thought he’d steal Johnny away? Her distrust struck a discordant note in Jake. It was one thing for him to distrust her, but another for her to distrust him.

  Jake turned back to his son. His son.

  “Hello, Johnny.” Jake could hardly speak past the lump in his throat. He hadn’t even been this nervous at his first gunfight.

  Like the focusing of a blurry picture, Johnny’s image cleared and Jake could suddenly see himself in the boy. Why hadn’t he recognized his own flesh and blood? He took a deep breath. “Catching anything?”

  Pete held up a stringer with five medium-sized trout. “Got us a start on supper.” He latched his shrewd gaze on Jake. “How about you?”

  Jake glanced at Kit, who seemed to be studying the fish with more attention than necessary. He turned back to the aged Indian. “You could say I caught more than I bargained for.”

  Kit speared him with a sharp look.

  Jake hunkered down beside Johnny, who stood holding his crude fishing pole. “Remember when you asked me if I would be your father if I married your ma?”

  Johnny nodded. “Yep, but you said you had to love each other first.”

  Kit straightened and turned away, but not before Jake spotted her trembling lips. His own stomach clenched with regrets. He pasted on a smile. “What if I told you that even if I didn’t marry her, I’d be your father?”

  Johnny appeared puzzled. “What do you mean?”

  “I’m really your father.”

  Johnny turned to Kit. “Is it true, Ma? Is Mr. Cordell my pa?”

  Her smile appeared strained. “Yes, he is, sweetheart.”

  Johnny squealed with delight and wrapped his skinny arms around Jake’s neck. “You’re my pa!”

  Unexpected tears burned in Jake’s eyes, and he hugged his son close. Glancing up, he noticed Kit’s gentle gaze upon them, and his heart skipped a beat. Never knowing what he’d missed all these years, he hadn’t longed for a home and family. Now, however, a fierce protectiveness rose in him. No one would harm Johnny, or Kit, as long as he lived.

  Johnny drew back, but kept his hand on Jake’s shoulder. The boy frowned slightly. “How come you never came to see me before?”

  Jake licked his suddenly dry lips. How could he tell Johnny he’d been too busy drinking and whoring?

  “He had a job to do, Johnny. He was hunting down outlaws who belonged in jail,” Kit replied.

  Surprised by her defense for him, Jake cast her a grateful look, and she nodded in acknowledgment.

  His son’s beaming smile returned. “But now you’re going to stay here with us, right?”

  “As soon as your mother and I get married.”

  The boy looked at Kit. “When is that?”

  “Sunday,” she replied.

  “Then we’ll all be a family,” Jake added.

  Johnny’s whoop nearly deafened him. “You hear that, Pete? I got a real family.”

  The sage Indian nodded, his obsidian eyes twinkling. “It’s about time. I figure if a man and a woman is going to get married, they may as well do it without a lot of fuss.”

  “Believe me, there isn’t going to be a lot of fuss for this one,” Kit said, bitterness ringing in her words.

  Jake’s light mood evaporated. In spite of the circumstances surrounding the wedding, his pride didn’t want others to know he’d used extortion to gain Kit’s agreement.

  Johnny suddenly grabbed his fishing pole. “I got one,” he shouted, drawing Jake’s attention.

  He turned back to the boy, and together he and Johnny landed a flopping fish on the bank.

  “Thanks, Pa,” Johnny said, holding up the twisting trout by the line.

  Jake ruffled his dark hair, his heart expanding into his throat. “You’re welcome, son.”

  The next morning, Kit reined in Cassie in front of Freda’s neat whitewashed fence. After dismounting, she wrapped the leather straps around the hitching post and brushed the dust from her burgundy split skirt.

  Opening the gate, she followed the hard-packed dirt path to the front porch. Her knock was answered a few moments later by her petite friend.

  “Come in,” Freda greeted with an expansive wave of a flour-covered hand. After Kit stepped across the threshold, Freda closed the door behind her. “What brings you here this early?”

  “Do you have a fresh pot of coffee?”

  Freda’s smile faded. “In the kitchen. There you can tell me what bothers you.”

  After pouring them each a cup of coffee, Kit lowered herself to a la
dderback chair. The older woman wiped her hands on her apron and joined her.

  “This is about Jake Cordell,” Freda stated.

  Kit glanced at her friend, startled. “How did you know?”

  “ I wasn’t born yesterday.” She shrugged her narrow shoulders. “Jake has been as grouchy as a fox.”

  Kit bit back a smile. “As grouchy as a bear.” She sipped her coffee, appreciating the strong, bitter brew. “At least Jake’s not enjoying this any more than I am. We’re getting married.”

  Freda’s eyes widened as her mouth dropped open. “Serious you are?”

  Kit nodded. “I’m afraid so. I told him Johnny was his son, and he threatened to take Johnny away from me if I didn’t marry him.”

  The German woman sighed. “I am not surprised. Jake will do anything to keep his son happy.”

  Kit laughed without humor. “And here I thought nobody knew Johnny was Jake’s son. I guess everyone but Jake saw the resemblance.” She paused, a sob welling in her throat. “How can I go through with it, Freda? He doesn’t love me.”

  “But you love him.”

  “That’s why it hurts so much.”

  Freda reached across the table and grasped Kit’s hand. “In the old country, arranged marriages were common. It was with Hans and me, but we came to love each other. For Jake, it will happen also. He already cares for you. If he didn’t, your feelings for Johnny would not have mattered to him.”

  Freda’s words pulled Kit out of despair, but did she dare hope that Jake would someday love her as much as she loved him? “How did you make your husband love you?”

  Freda smiled, and her gaze seemed to turn inward to unseen memories. For a moment, Kit could see how Freda must’ve looked as a young woman, before time’s trials had furrowed her brow and shadowed her eyes. “After we were married, those were good days. My Hans would work in the fields and I would take him his lunch. We would sit and talk beneath a big oak tree. We fell in love during that time.” She blinked and focused on Kit. “I did nothing but be with him. Often we did not even talk, but just sat quietly in front of the hearth. I would mend and Hans would smoke his pipe. Sometimes when I close my eyes, I can still smell the tobacco.” Freda shook her head, the years stamping their mark on her features once more. “If only he had stayed away from the liquor.”