by R. J. Lewis
“The whole cake?”
A ghost of a smile flickered across his lips. “Fucking, doll. That’s what I meant.”
I nodded. “I know, Borden.”
“And if I fucked you, it’d be forceful, wouldn’t it?”
“Well, that’s what rape is, Borden. Forceful.”
He shrugged. “You can have consensual forceful fucking, right?”
Before I responded, I felt fingers brush against me and I looked down at the side of my bare thigh where his hand was. My heart sped up at this random gesture. Casual Borden was long gone, and he was back on his power trip.
Don’t react. I told myself. Play by his rules.
But it’d been so long since he’d touched me, and I’d thought about it every day, almost yearning for it. The noise around us no longer bothered me. I was too enveloped in the presence of this man to notice anyone besides us, too observant of the fingers tingling across my skin, giving me goose bumps. My heart was going a million miles an hour and I just knew nothing good was going to come of this.
“Do you ever think about our kiss?” His words broke through my thoughts with a crash. “Ever think of how good it felt?”
I hesitated. “I think about it.”
“Ever imagine what would have happened if I’d stayed?”
I pressed my lips down hard, unsure of how much I wanted to admit. “Sometimes.”
“How do you think it would have gone, Emma? When you daydream about it, am I going down on you? Licking your pussy before shoving my cock inside you? Or am I already spreading your legs wide on that nasty desk and plunging inside your wet cunt with your arms around my neck?”
Holy fuck.
I was deprived of oxygen. I stared into his eyes, every inch of me hot as those images flooded my mind when he spoke them.
I murmured almost inaudibly, “Spreading me wide and plunging inside me with my arms around your neck.”
He ran his teeth over his bottom lip slowly. “Straight to the point. I like that, Emma.”
I didn’t respond. I turned away and blinked rapidly, trying to get my heart to stop from bursting inside my chest. Jesus, he had a mouth on him.
“Did you intend on getting fucked tonight?” he then asked. “Is that why you wore this dress?”
He was deadly serious with that question. I felt myself squirm and then hated myself for allowing him to have this effect on me! It wasn’t fair. Why wasn’t I returning the favour? The man had an obvious soft spot for me, and if he was going to purposely rile me up, then why not do the same?
“Yes,” I answered as casually as I could.
His eyes widened in surprise and then darkened. “Is that right?”
I nodded certainly.
“Has it been that long that you’re so desperate for a fuck with a gangly looking man in skinny jeans?”
Oh, God.
It was him. He was responsible for scaring Jake away.
Well, that made a lot more sense.
“Hasn’t been that long,” I replied calmly. “A little over a week.”
His fingers abruptly left my leg. Now he was angry. “A little over a week?”
“Yeah.”
“You’re a liar.”
“Nope. You think it’s hard getting away from your muscle? Moustache Man sucks at what he does –”
He gripped my chin suddenly and forced my face up to look at him. His grip was tight but not painful. I looked up into his thunderous eyes. The passive exterior he’d tried so hard to contain had broken through, and he was seething.
My whole body came alive and adrenaline surged through me again. I was mortified at myself for feeling… excited.
“Don’t you ever fucking lie to me again,” he growled. “There was no one last week, and there was no one the weeks before that. It’s been a very long time since you’ve been touched by another man, so stop bullshitting me, Emma. It was me, and only me.”
He leaned in forward until his nose was barely touching mine. His eyes looked deeply into mine and my heart squeezed painfully as he softly added, “And no one’s going to be touching you either. You got it?”
Though he waited impatiently, I made no movement.
“Emma?” he said threateningly.
I finally nodded and he let go, swiftly looking around the room with his face all screwed up. His anger was exploding right out of him, but he held it in with remarkable effort.
I couldn’t stop myself from smiling. I had to look away so he couldn’t see it. What was it about me that made him able to hold back from losing his shit? And why did that satisfy me so damn much?
“While this has been…interesting, I should go,” I said after some silence. Time to flee Mr Mercurial and return to my safe haven of a home. Moustache Man was most likely still kicking around outside somewhere.
“I’ll take you home,” he replied.
“It’s okay,” I protested with a shake of my head. “I’ll call Graeme –”
“That wasn’t a fucking offer, Emma. I’m telling you I’m taking you home. Get up and let’s go.” His voice was hard and that frightening gleam shadowed his eyes as he waited for me to respond.
Eventually I nodded. He wouldn’t quit until he got his way.
I stood up with him and quickly pushed down my mini-dress after it’d hiked up to my thighs from sitting down for so long. I ignored his eyes as they lingered around my ass and legs.
Thankfully, he kept his distance as we trudged out of there.
*
It was my first time in a Ferrari. I tried not to act so excited, but I was bursting at the seams inside. I felt a little awkward because the drive had been a silent one. I ran away with my thoughts, feeling things I shouldn’t. Like safe. That was the last thing this man was given how riled up he made me.
I tried not to look at him, but I was like Granny. I just had to rudely stare. I was immune to his punishments, so I didn’t worry about being caught gawking.
He caught me looking every time. After about the sixth time his eyebrows rose in exasperation. “Didn’t anyone tell you it’s rude to stare?”
I spotted some discomfort in him. Either he hated being stared at –and who wouldn’t – or he wasn’t used to it. People did turn away when he looked anywhere in their vicinity. It was always per his demand to be looked at directly.
I wondered why I enjoyed making him uncomfortable. I had some kind of weird fascination pushing his buttons to see how far he would go without losing his shit. Sort of like what he was doing to me.
I ignored his question.
“Don’t drop me off in front of the apartment building,” I said. “I’d hate for anyone to do something to your car. Lot of people loiter around there.”
“Don’t worry about my car in your ghetto,” he replied.
“Ghetto, huh?”
“How else would you describe your living environment? Educate me.”
I thought for a moment. It was a miserable little area, I’ll give him that. A lot of gangs lurked there and they were none too welcoming either. They hadn’t bothered me personally, and were more affiliated with drug exchanges than girls, so it wasn’t all that bad.
“Pretty ghetto,” I finally agreed quietly. “We’re not all lucky and rich.”
Well, that was a clear dig at him. Nothing like being another poor person with a chip on their shoulder, Emma!
“I wasn’t until a lot later in life,” he corrected me. “I had my fair share of poverty before I left town. I’ve been to places that make your apartment dwelling look like a dream.”
My eyes widened in surprise.
“I never knew that,” I said. “I mean, nobody ever said anything about that.”
“That’s because nobody knows of my travels,” he mumbled disinterestedly. “I’d like to keep it that way too.”
“Oh.”
I wasn’t sure if I was allowed to pry, though I wanted to – and suddenly I really wanted to.
“Where did you go?” I blurted out.
“Away from here.”
“Was it scary?”
He tensed a little, his thoughts firing behind his eyes. “Yes,” he truthfully answered. “It was.”
The car slowed down on the street facing the apartment complex. He looked at the building and then at the same group of men out front of the entrance doors, all five of them. They still never hassled me, and I was inclined to think they were genuinely okay guys, but Borden frowned at the sight of them. Rightfully wary.
“Let me walk you in,” he said, turning off the engine.
“You don’t have to,” I quickly replied.
He just stared at me.
Shit.
We got out and headed to the entrance doors of the apartment building. He had his hand wrapped around my waist, as though marking me in front of the men. They heard our footsteps and turned to look at us. Their eyes wandered about my body and one whistled faintly. I reddened and kept my eyes drawn to the pavement. They didn’t say anything, but I caught Borden glaring at them.
I unlocked the door and walked in. He followed too closely behind. In the elevator, he looked at the graffiti-filled walls and ceiling in pure distaste.
“This is just sad,” he muttered. “How much are you paying on rent every month for this hellhole?”
“Let’s just say most of my paycheck before you hired me,” I replied, unable to conceal my smile.
We got off on my floor and walked to my apartment. I stopped at my door and was about to say something when the screaming next door erupted and the television roared from the other side. He looked in the directions they were coming from.
I smiled. “Nothing wrong with a bit of white noise, right?”
“Right,” he muttered, his lips flitting up. “Gives me a bit of nostalgia, to be honest. I didn’t live far from here when I was your age.”
“It’s gotten a bit better. The crime, I mean.”
He shook his head slowly. “Not by much, doll.”
I turned away from his enthralling eyes and unlocked my door. Stepping inside, I turned on the hallway light.
“Thank you for the ride,” I told him, turning around to face him.
He stood unmoving in front of me, like he was waiting for something else.
“And for taking me inside,” I added.
He looked into my eyes and then over my head and into my apartment. It took me only a second to realize what his intentions were.
“You can go now,” I said, unsure of how else I should shoo him away.
“Not going to invite me in?” he asked in surprise.
“No,” I quickly responded with a shake of my head. “That would be like diving into open waters and waiting for the sharks to start circling me.”
He processed my words in silence, looking thoughtful as ever.
“I’m not so bad,” he finally said.
I raised a sceptical brow. “You’re a crim…” I paused. “I just don’t feel comfortable with you outside of work. This is meant to be a professional arrangement.”
“Fuck professionalism. There’s nothing fun about it.”
I sighed. “It’s not meant to be fun.”
“Invite me in, Emma.”
“No. I still don’t know much about you anyway.”
“What would you like to know?”
Oh, jeez.
“Well, why do you want to come in so much?” I retorted, annoyed.
“I’ve never been turned away before.” He shrugged. “I usually… I usually do that.”
“So because you don’t have control of the situation, you feel like you can push me around and try and persuade me into letting you into my privacy? And don’t you dare threaten me, either, because you’ve exhausted every freaking thing you can threaten me over –”
He interrupted me by putting his hand in his pocket and taking out a money clip filled with hundred dollar notes. My eyes widened.
“It’s not control,” he told me, looking down at the money. “It’s that I want you. For a very long time, I’ve wanted you.”
When I didn’t respond, he leaned forward, coming to my level, resting his hands against each side of the doorway so that he was a foot away from my stunned face.
“I haven’t been with a woman in a very long time. I’m clean as a whistle, and I’ve got a lot of money. A few grand in my hand here if you want it. I’m not asking for anything else. We can keep it strictly business. I don’t have a problem with giving you money in exchange for–”
“Are you out of your mind?” I interrupted harshly. I wanted to scream at him but I bit my tongue. “I’m not a whore!”
“I never said you were.”
“You’re throwing money in my face so you can sleep with me?”
“We wouldn’t be sleeping.”
“You’re crazier than I thought.” I was practically spewing through clenched teeth, I couldn’t believe what he was saying! “You think I’m desperate enough to have sex with you? You?!”
“You do live quite poorly, Emma.”
“I would rather eat rat faeces than accept payment for throwing away my dignity to a horrible man like you.”
“You would eat rat faeces? I’m starting to wonder how kinky you are–”
“Go away, Borden.”
“It’s a simple exchange, money for sex–”
My anger had risen to a boiling point, and I wound up slapping him across the face as hard as I could. Again, the bomb had exploded. There was ringing in the air, and I was hovering over my body, watching in awe at what I had done.
Then, there it was: the surprise on his face, his chest rising and falling quickly, and the sudden hunger in his eyes when he looked at me.
My last thought was, oh fuck, before he took a step forward and smashed his lips against mine.
Nineteen
Emma
I’d never been kissed like this before. Not even last time with him compared to this.
Was it even considered kissing when I felt like I was being devoured?
And why was my traitorous body unable to pull away from him?
I shook from the rush of his tongue invading my mouth, of how harshly he was pushing me back until I was against the wall of my unit. I vaguely heard the sound of the door slamming shut before his hands grabbed at either side of my face. One hand moved to my hair and gripped a chunk of it back so that my face slanted up to his.
He tasted like mint and fruit and all male. I felt his lower body pushing against mine, pinning me in one spot, and the hard ridge in his pants against my stomach.
Holy shit. Holy fucking shit.
Those hands moved down my body, lightly over my breasts and then harshly around my hips, squeezing them before travelling further down to my thighs. All the while, he kissed me and barely broke away to breathe. His tongue clashed over mine and his teeth nipped at my bottom lip. I breathed out erratically into his opened mouth as his hands pulled my dress further up my thighs. I felt cold air on my exposed skin and then his hot hands on the back of my thighs.
I gasped when he picked me up and, to my shame, I steadfastly wrapped my legs around his hips. He pushed even further into me, until his length pressed harder against the front of my exposed underwear, right at the nub of my nerves. A single brush against it and my body exploded with an electric jolt of pleasure.
I was hot. Insanely hot. My body was overheated, my skin already stricken with sweat, my hair tangled, my mouth dry, and my senses burnt out. He pulled back just slightly and then ground his erection into me. I inhaled sharply as another jolt of pleasure shot up my body, encompassing me in its short-lived bliss.
He licked my lips and regarded me through hooded eyes. He ground harder into me again, and I shut my eyes briefly and let out a moan. Oh, it’d been so long. So. Damn. Long since I’d felt the warmth of another man.
But this wasn’t just another man. He was a predator that screamed strength and power and I gladly surrendered myself to the feel of him. He breathed harshly again
st me, licking his way along my jawline before pulling back again.
“Do it again,” he grunted out anxiously.
Confused, I opened my eyes and scanned his face. In a cloud of lust, I couldn’t understand what he meant. He was panting against me, holding me up without effort, and staring at me as if he was in desperate need of something.
Do it again. Do what again?
Under the dim light I saw his one cheek redden, and it suddenly occurred to me what he wanted.
He wanted me to slap him?
No, no, no. This would be a serious libido killer. I didn’t want to slap him! Well, I mean, I wanted to slap him, but not for pleasurable reasons and not right this very second.
My hesitation was obvious. He leaned in and licked my lips again and I hastily tried to kiss him, needing to feel more of him, but he pulled back before my lips met his.
“Do it again,” he demanded now. “Or should I continue to wave my money around and call you a whore this time to get you to–”
I slapped him. Harder than before. The same bewildered look crossed his face. His erection intensified against me and I was… confused and horny as all hell, but so confused.
I watched his cheek redden even more and his chest heaved up and down quicker. He was full blown panting as if he’d run a marathon. He wrapped his hand around my hair again, fisting it roughly against my scalp before he dove back into my mouth. I shook in his grip with the need for friction against my pelvis, and he appeased me with one rough grind that had me wrapping an arm around his neck to keep him closer to me.
I was drenched and needy, and when he painfully tugged at my hair, sending sharp pain throughout my body, I moaned unexpectedly as the pain pooled with my pleasure.
“You like it rough, don’t you?” he murmured, sucking my lip.
I shook my head, denying it.
“No?” he whispered before tugging my hair again, drawing out another hiss and a moan. “Your body says otherwise.”
Pulling my hair, he angled my head upwards so that his mouth had free access to my throat. He sucked along my skin harshly and bit, causing me to gasp and moan again. My fingers dug into his back, and he groaned and bit me harder before licking away the marks.