Shadow of Doubt

by Abbie Zanders

  “Jeannie automatically doubles the size of my orders,” he confessed. “Sandy started it. She said it saved everyone time.”

  “Nothing wrong with a hearty appetite. Are you as voracious about other things?”

  There was that boldness again, rising from the depths without warning.

  He didn’t answer at first and then said very quietly, “There are some things I don’t think I could ever get enough of, Kate. One of them is sitting across from me right now.”

  This. Man.

  She sucked in a breath, thrilled with his answer. It took her a moment to find her words. “You know, I was kind of thinking the same thing about you.”

  His gaze grew more intense and then cooled.

  “What just happened?” she asked, fascinated and disappointed at the same time. “Your eyes—they were so hot, and then they went cold.”

  “Kate ... I meant what I said, but ...”

  “But what?” she pressed.

  “I wasn’t kidding when I told you I can be single-minded when it comes to certain things.”

  “Certain things. Things like ... me?”

  He nodded. “I’m concerned that, if we take things further, I won’t be able to dial things back. I’m not sure you’re ready for that or even if that’s something you want.”

  He’d said something similar at Andy’s.

  “What if you’re the one who decides that I’m not what you want?”

  He shook his head. “Not gonna happen.”

  “How can you be so sure? I mean, you hardly know anything about me.”

  “I know that you’ve got the biggest heart of anyone I’ve ever met. I know I’ve never come across anyone who makes me feel the way you do. I know I can’t stop thinking about you and how, when I kiss you, it requires every ounce of self-discipline I have not to throw you onto the nearest surface and make you scream my name until you forget every other.”

  Kate had thought she was speechless before, but it was nothing compared to how she felt after hearing that. Her nipples tightened, and the area between her thighs throbbed in synchronization with the pounding of her heart. Graphic images flashed through her mind, explicit visions of him doing exactly what he’d described. The only words that came to mind were, Yes, please, and, Now.

  The look in his eyes kept her from saying anything. He wanted her—of that, she had no doubt—but he was also warning her. He was letting her know he wasn’t interested in a casual fling and that, if they did take the next step, there would be serious consequences.

  He meant what he said, and he said what he meant. She could do no less.

  “I understand.”

  Chapter Fifteen

  Mad Dog

  A week later, Mad Dog still wasn’t sure what Kate was thinking because she hadn’t given a firm yay or nay one way or the other.

  After he’d issued his dire warning, the evening had taken a somber turn. They’d still talked and enjoyed each other’s company, but the air had been heavier between them and lacked the fun, lighthearted, sexy vibe they’d been sharing up to that point.

  He couldn’t say it was a bad thing because he wanted her to understand. For her to have enough information to make a deliberate, informed decision with eyes wide open. Full disclosure.

  That didn’t mean he wasn’t second-guessing himself. He was.

  In retrospect, maybe he shouldn’t have been as direct. Maybe he could have chosen a better time and place. Maybe he should have just kept his mouth shut and let the chips fall where they may.

  But hell, he couldn’t do that. Kate had to know what she was getting into before things went too far. If, after serious consideration, she decided she couldn’t deal ... well, he didn’t want to think about that.

  They were still communicating via text, but the context had changed. No more pictures of her in PJs, only pictures of the dogs and some of her “food experiments,” as she called them.

  What did that mean? Was she keeping things chill until she made up her mind? Or was that her subtle way of telling him that she had made up her mind and wasn’t interested in taking things further?

  And who the fuck was this Luther guy, really? Either Sam or Sandy—he couldn’t remember who—had mentioned him once before, but Mad Dog hadn’t been as invested then as he was now.

  Was Renninger still sniffing around Kate? She’d said he wasn’t an issue, and Mad Dog trusted that was the case with her, but he didn’t trust that it was the same with him. No man in his right mind would simply walk away from a woman like Kate.

  Also, had Kate been the one to end things, or had Renninger?

  Mad Dog didn’t know. What he did know was, he was losing his fucking mind, asking himself questions.

  He was in a sour mood when he entered the main building with the completed plans for the greenhouse and a preliminary design to convert one of the larger outbuildings into a fitness center. Seeing Cage waiting for him did nothing to improve it.

  “Good, you’re here. Briefing in the war room.”

  “About what?”

  “The mines.”

  Annoyed that his coffee and muffin would have to wait, Mad Dog walked with him. Everyone else was already assembled, and the serious looks on their faces didn’t bode well.

  Church waited until he took a seat to begin. “Cage and I went to check out the mine entrance you’d told us about.”

  Mad Dog nodded. He’d expected as much.

  “When you were there with Kate, how far into the mine did you go?”

  He thought about the short distance from the entrance to the chamber where the dogs had been. “About a hundred feet, give or take.”

  “No farther?”

  “No. Why?”

  Church and Cage exchanged a look.

  It was Cage who replied. “Because it goes a hell of a lot deeper than that.”

  Church explained, “We believe the chamber you were in was a waiting area where workers would gather for the next car to take them down into the mines. There are sections of track buried just beyond, and we followed them to where they split. The left branch led to a cave-in. The right didn’t.”

  Cage nodded and took up the tale. “It was fucking eerie, man. Like stepping back in time into some kind of underground temple or something. Massive open areas with columns and pillars of coal with more tunnels shooting off in different directions. We found mine carts, oil lamps, even a couple bird cages.”

  “Bird cages?” Heff asked.

  “Coal miners used to carry canaries into the shafts with them to detect toxic gases, like carbon monoxide,” Doc explained. “Birds are more sensitive to that kind of thing and served as an early warning system. If they dropped dead, the miners knew there was a problem.”

  “Right. Continue.”

  “Here’s where it gets really interesting,” Cage said. “We followed one of the tunnels, and after about an hour, we came upon another large chamber. And this one had indications of recent use.”

  “How recent?” That was from Smoke.

  “Recent enough to warrant further investigation,” Church said, flicking his eyes Mad Dog’s way.

  Before he could ask what that was all about, Cage continued, “It’ll take weeks to fully explore everything. We’re going to take GPS trackers down with us next time. That way, we’ll be able to map out exactly which chambers and tunnels are open and which aren’t. And bonus: we’ll be able to integrate that with the digital maps we already have and superimpose those with a current satellite map of the area.”

  “Fuck, I think Cage just came a little,” Heff commented.

  They ignored him.

  “I want in,” Doc said.

  Mad Dog nodded in agreement. The thought of exploring an underground network was fascinating. Plus, they weren’t the types to sit around indoors while waiting for the spring thaw. They were chomping at the bit to go out and do something.

  Church nodded in approval. “Teams of two. No one goes down there alone, feel me? And we’ll n
eed someone topside at all times to monitor and coordinate.”

  Unsurprisingly, Smoke—who had been in a tunnel collapse overseas and had an aversion to tight, closed spaces—offered to stay aboveground. Heff said he would as well.

  Briefing over, the guys started filing out. Mad Dog hung back to give the completed designs to Church.

  He looked them over and handed them back. “Looks good. Write up a list of everything we’ll need and place an order. I’d like to have everything on hand when the weather breaks. As for the fitness center, let’s bring in Kieran Callaghan and Michael Connelly and hear their thoughts before we commit. Callaghan runs a place in Pine Ridge, and Connelly’s got a string of health, fitness, and rehab centers nationwide. Both are former military, so they’ll have valuable input.”

  “Sounds good to me. Now, tell me what’s really on your mind, Church.”

  His lips quirked briefly. Mad Dog had been around him long enough to know when he was holding back.

  “Those indications of recent use I mentioned? Well, we found footprints in the dirt, coming and going.”

  “What makes you think they’re recent?”

  “The tread.”

  That made sense. Boots made a century ago hadn’t had the same patterns as those made more recently.

  “And?”

  “And some were obviously male. Others suggest an adult female.”

  Church hesitated, and Mad Dog knew where he was headed. It pissed him off.

  “And you immediately assume they’re Kate’s?”

  “I’m not assuming anything. Kate admitted to exploring the tunnels. She also told you that very few people knew about them, but clearly, someone does. If it’s not her roaming around down there—”

  “It’s not.”

  “Then, maybe she knows who is.”

  “So, what if she does?” he grumbled, thinking how Kate had been so quick to change the subject. “I can’t ask her without arousing suspicion. She’ll wonder why I’m asking, and I’m guessing you don’t want me to tell her.”

  “No,” Church agreed. “But you could tell her that Doc has a fascination with local mining history and ask if she’d be willing to share some of her stories with him.”

  A growl rumbled in the back of his throat as that possessiveness rose up again. He didn’t want Kate sharing stories with anyone but him.

  “And you, of course,” Church said with a hint of a smirk.

  “I’ll think about it.”

  Church nodded. “Fair enough.”

  Mad Dog’s stomach rumbled, reminding him that it needed more than the bowl of instant oatmeal he’d had earlier. He’d been keeping to his trailer the last couple of days, and as such, his food supplies were running low. He was going to have to take another run into town and soon. Hopefully, that trip would also involve some time with Kate.

  With that in mind, he set a course for the kitchen. The center island in the dining room had already been cleared, but Sam always kept something hot and ready for stragglers. He identified and spotted his target immediately—a large, covered, rectangular bin on the counter—and headed right for it.

  “Hey, Mad Dog.” Sam emerged from the walk-in freezer, carrying an armload of wrapped packages.

  “Sam.” He altered his route and provided assistance. “Dinner?”

  “Yep. Thought we’d try spare ribs tonight. Kate sent me a super-easy recipe.”

  That was news to him. “You’ve been talking with Kate?”

  “Yep. She sends me pictures of the puppies every day and gives me meal ideas. You were right about that, by the way. She’s got some amazing recipes. I bet she could open up her own restaurant if she wanted to.”

  Based on the meals she’d shared with him, he heartily concurred. He grabbed a plate and scooped copious amounts of fried potatoes and hash onto it.

  Sandy entered the kitchen, laptop in hand, looking more relaxed and happier than she had been only a few weeks earlier. Heff had claimed most of the credit for that, but Mad Dog thought some of it had to do with Sandy finding her niche. She was doing what she loved to do in an environment that allowed her to do so at her pace.

  “Are you talking about Kate?” Sandy asked.

  “Yeah,” Sam answered. “I was just telling Mad Dog how I wish I had half her culinary skill.”

  “Rico tried to coax her into working for him at Franco’s several times,” Sandy said, nodding, providing another bit of information with which he’d been unaware. “Kate always thanked him but told him she already had a job. Which reminds me, I need to call her when things settle down a bit.”

  “Why?” Mad Dog asked, taking a seat.

  “I want to talk to her about possibly revamping Handelmann’s website. Now that I’ve decided to give self-employment a try, I’m reaching out to all the local businesses.”

  “Good idea. Maybe we can kill a few birds with one stone,” Sam commented and then turned to him. “When are you going to see Kate again?”

  “I don’t know.”

  Both women paused and exchanged a look, and then Sam narrowed her eyes. “Did something happen? Is that why you’ve been hiding out in your trailer all week?”

  “Nothing happened, and I have not been hiding out. I’ve been busy.”

  “Uh-huh.” She crossed her arms over her chest and stared at him.

  His mother used to give him the same look when she suspected he wasn’t being entirely truthful.

  “Sam, nothing’s wrong. Kate and I are just”—hell, he didn’t know what they were doing—“figuring things out.”

  “What’s there to figure out? You like her. She obviously likes you.”

  “It’s not that simple, Sam,” Sandy said thoughtfully. “It should be, but it’s not.”

  “No, but I’m not sure it matters. It didn’t to us.” Sam looked at Mad Dog. “Whose idea was it to back off? Hers or yours?”

  “My money’s on Mad Dog,” Sandy said when he didn’t answer right away. “I bet he’s doing the same thing Heff did—backing off to let Kate make her own choices.”

  Sam nodded emphatically. “Steve did the same thing.”

  “Is that so bad?” he muttered.

  “No,” Sandy admitted, “and I even understand where you’re coming from. You guys, you’re wired differently. You tend to strip everything down into black and white, all or nothing. But it doesn’t have to be that way.”

  Sandy was right. He and his teammates were different. The ability to see shades of gray got snuffed out pretty quick when they had to make split-second decisions that meant life or death to themselves and their team. They’d learned to trust their instincts, and his instincts screamed that Kate was the one for him. That was why it was so hard for him to sit back and wait for Kate to come to the same conclusion.

  “Did Kate give any indication that she wanted to slow things down?” Sam asked.

  He shook his head.

  “I don’t think you’re giving Kate enough credit,” Sandy mused. “For as friendly as she is, she’s also very independent-minded. She listens to what other people have to say, but she definitely makes up her own mind.”

  “Luther Renninger is a perfect example,” Sam said.

  His ears perked up. “How so?”

  “Well, it’s no secret that Kate’s mom has been trying to push those two together for years. No one thought it would actually happen. He and Kate were friendly because their parents were friends, but they weren’t exactly each other’s type, if you know what I mean.”

  “When Luther came back from college and they started dating, it surprised us all.”

  “Kate’s mom was thrilled. She was already making wedding plans, though I don’t think Kate knew anything about it.”

  Both women shook their heads.

  He needed to hear the rest of the story. “So, what happened?”

  “Well, Kate found out that Luther had been sleeping around and kicked his ass to the curb. But honestly, I don’t think it would have lasted much longer
anyway. They just weren’t a good fit, you know? And I can tell you this: Kate’s mom was more upset over their breakup than Kate was.”

  “Besides, I never saw Kate look at Luther the way she looks at you.”

  His chest swelled at the possibility.

  “In fact, I bet the only reason she’s going along with this whole idea of yours is because you need the time to figure things out, not because she does.”

  Dare he hope? A plan was already forming in his mind, one that would prove or disprove their theory.

  He shoveled the last bites of food into his mouth and stood. “Good talk, ladies.”

  Chapter Sixteen

  Kate

  Apparently, Kate’s dinner with Chris had become the talk of the town. That in itself didn’t bother her; she’d expected as much. When you went to a place like Franco’s, tongues wagged. It was just the nature of the small-town beast.

  What did bother her was the fact that Luther was treating it like it was a personal attack on him. “I understand now,” he said, coming into the store a few days after her dinner date with Chris.

  “Good for you. What are we talking about?”

  “How you feel when I see other women.”

  “We’re not together anymore, Luther. I really don’t care what you do. Go out with whoever you want, whenever you want.”

  “You’ve made your point, Kate. I get it. But at least I was discreet. I didn’t flaunt it and publicly humiliate you.”

  Kate paused what she was doing and crossed her arms over her chest, amazed. He couldn’t actually be that dense, could he?

  “So, let me get this straight. In your mind, what you did wasn’t humiliating because you had sex with them behind closed doors?”

  He ground his teeth together. “Goddamn it, Kate. I said I was sorry. What else do you want from me?”

  She uncrossed her arms and went back to wiping down the counter. “That’s just it, Luther. I don’t want anything from you, except maybe for you to let it go.”

  He continued as if she hadn’t spoken, “I made dinner reservations at the Celtic Goddess for Valentine’s Day.”