I mused at the thought of such an offer, one which had never been made to me before, by anyone. Boy was he bold, I thought to myself.
“Care to share?” he asked. “A penny for your thoughts?”
“You’re bold.”
“As bold as love,” he replied, reminiscent of a Jimmy Hendrix song.
“I’ve never been propositioned to this way.”
“This isn’t a proposition. It’s a proposal,” he said. Holding my hands in his, he stated, “Last night, I held your hand but for a moment. I’m asking you to let me hold your hand for more than just a moment in time. I want to be here for you, carry you through whatever you’re going through. I have the feeling you were meant to be in my life for more than just a moment,” he said, raising one of my hands to his lips, for a kiss. “No pressure,” he added.
His argument was very persuasive, but I decided to remain on guard. I hardly knew him, he hardly knew me.
“I don’t expect you to tell me how you feel right now. Matter of fact, I don’t expect anything from you except for you to tell me what you need. And I can work at getting you what you need. I can…”
I leaned forward and gave him a full kiss on the lips, in a move that somewhat stunned him and me equally. “I’m saying yes to your proposal,” I said, certain the kiss was more than he wanted and expected, but less than he desired and needed.
“That was…unexpected,” he said, clearly chuffed that it had happened. “So, the possibility of us being an item – we give it a shot?” he asked, gently tracing the outline of my lips with his index finger.
“Yes,” I agreed, my head reeling slightly from the kiss. I’d kissed him, and he’d taken me in whole and fully, as though he never wanted it to end. I had to reel things in before they went too far.
“Talk to me,” he said, sensing I had something else to say.
“I just have a few ground rules I’d like to lay down, before we go any further.” I started.
“I’m all ears,” he replied, listening intently.
“Sex. I lost my virginity by force, but I still don’t believe in sex before marriage,” I told him. “So, no sex.”
“I can deal with that,” he said quickly, surprising me. “Anything else?”
“Honesty. Please be honest with me. Please tell me exactly how you feel, when you feel it.
“I can dig that,” he replied. “Anything else?”
“Just one more. Respect. I need you to respect my choices, respect my wishes, respect me.”
“Got it,” he said. “Now, I’ve got some ground rules of my own,” he started.
“Okay, I’m listening,” I replied, noting how his eyes had suddenly lit up.
“Acceptance,” he stated. “I’m not the easiest person to get along with, but I try. I just ask that you accept me in all that I am and for all that I am.”
That sounded simple enough. “I can handle that,” I told him.
“Exclusivity,” he mentioned. “I’m not a fan of multiplicity. I want you and you only, and expect you to want the same,” he said firmly.
“I hear you. I can give you exclusivity. Anything else?” I asked.
“I’m a man of faith, so I’ve got certain expectations tying into what I believe in,” he said.
“Care to elaborate?” I asked, intrigued.
“I believe in church on Sunday, praying together, modesty, convention. I’m not perfect, but I try. I need you to understand that everything I do is dictated largely by what I believe in. If I don’t believe in it, I won’t do it, and I won’t allow it. Not for me and not for you.”
“Fair enough,” I responded, intrigued by his openness. “Though, being so strict about everything doesn’t allow much room for flexibility, now does it?”
Caught off guard, he paused for a moment. “Within reason. Flexibility within reason.”
“I hear you,” I replied.
“I think we’ll do alright then,” he predicted, kissing my hand again. Getting up suddenly, he asked, “You finally ready to eat, Counsellor?”
“If it’ll please you, Detective,” I joked.
He raised a brow in response. “I’m off duty until further notice.”
“Good. And yes,” I replied. “I’m famished.”
“Awesome,” he replied, hurriedly throwing the white bass he’d caught earlier onto the barbeque plate, along with the vegetables I’d cut.
I watched him from a distance, considering his knack with all things to do with the outdoors. He turned sharply to meet my gaze. “You were saying?” he asked.
“I wasn’t saying,” I replied, laughing lightly. “You’re too perceptive.”
“You’re too gorgeous,” he replied.
Such a charmer, I thought, forgetting my earlier anguish and sadness. I could learn to forget and move on with him. At least this was what I hoped.
We cruised along the lake for a while longer after dinner.
Stepping away from the steering wheel he motioned for me to join him on the corner settee. I did. The water was clear and tranquil. A few mosquitos were abuzz. “Should probably head inside soon,” he suggested. “There’re enough mosquitos out here to swarm us out.”
I smiled at the exaggeration and nodded in response. Despite how beautiful it was out on the water, the thought of being swarmed by mosquitos held no appeal.
“We’re also gonna be out of range soon,” he mentioned. “Did you want to call anyone before we head out?”
“My sister Kyela. She’s in France at the moment. I’ll send a quick text to her, and she’ll let everyone else know I’m fine. Other than that, I don’t have anyone else to call.” I didn’t want to risk dealing with Duayne again, and I needed time to consider my next move.
“Hey,” Daniel said, getting me out of my thoughts and back to him. “You’re not doing this alone. I’m here with you.”
I half smiled in response. “There’s still Duayne I need to contend with when I get back.”
“Easy. Police escort to your property. Change the locks, install security cameras, get a restraining order out on him,” he suggested. “Consider charging him with rape.”
“I’m not sure I can do any of that,” I told him. “He’ll deny the charges, say it was consensual, draw it out, and try to destroy me in the process. He’ll…”
“Hey. He can’t hurt you any longer. He can try, but he won’t succeed.” Slapping a mosquito off his arm, he motioned for us to go inside.
Inside, I avoided the topic of Duayne, opting to shift the focus on my developing romance with Daniel instead. “Tell me more about you, tell me about your boat and why you love being on the water so much,” I said.
“I had the external custom built, did the interior myself. Boating’s a passion of mine, nothin’ says freedom like getting out on the open water. I find it very liberating getting away from it all…,” he replied.
“When do you find the time to do all you do? Your work in law, investigations and all?”
“Always plenty of time for work,” he said, tight lipped about his line of work. “I’ve been single for a while too. That in itself gives me a lot of time to do whatever I please.”
“Why did you quit law?” I asked.
“I didn’t exactly quit. I’d like to say I walked away from it, but truth is I found myself in contempt of court over a contentious issue in a case. State Board recommended I take a leave of absence. Had to eat, and the Force and private parties were looking for an investigator at the time, so I made the leap.”
“Sounds like you didn’t have a choice but to. Sorry to hear that you had to walk away from practicing law,” I said.
“Don’t be. If I wasn’t doing what I’m doing now, we might never have met,” he reasoned.
“True,” I said in response.
“Plus I enjoy being an enforcer of the law so to speak. Having a background in law gives me the edge in gathering evidence. I can visualize how it will all play out in court, and to a large extent, this helps determ
ine the outcome.”
I nodded my head in agreement. “Did you work solo or with a partner?”
“I worked with a partner. MacCauley and Brennan’s the name,” he announced.
“So, your partner, MacCauley, he or she still running the firm?”
“Yep. He – Craig still runs the firm,” he said. It seemed I had touched a sore spot. “Still trading as MacCauley and Brennan.”
“Oh okay,” I said, putting the topic to rest. “So, you’ve been single for a while now?” I asked instead.
“Yes, though not anymore I’m not,” he corrected.
“Right. Okay. Before you were with me, you were single. No girlfriend, no long term relationship?”
“My life was too full with work to make room for that,” he said abruptly, contradicting himself. He obviously had time for me now.
“But you’re here with me?”
“What we have here is different. I’ve been waiting for the right person to come along. You’ve only just come along,” he explained. “Plus I wasn’t the most sought after bachelor back in college. I kept to myself mostly, except when I needed to compare notes or do group assignments, and boy did I hate those,” he recalled.
“You and me both,” I laughed, the memory all too clear.
He took a swig of his Dr. Pepper then leaned forward as though he were letting me in on a secret. “So, in college you’ve got your jocks, your beauties, your geniuses, your nerds and your weirdos. I was one of the weirdos,” he said plainly. “Now I’m a qualified lawyer, women want to be with me. For all the wrong reasons.”
“I’m not sure I buy that,” I told him. “I’m sure you’ve made many a woman swoon and I’m sure there’s no shortage of women trying to be with you for all the right reasons,” I stated, remembering the looks he would get when we were out. Looks he was seemingly unaware of.
“Money talks…,” he replied.
“True,” I said. “So how do you know that I’m not into you for all the wrong reasons?” I asked.
“Lady, I have the uncanny ability to know what someone is about when I first meet them, and I know your intentions are good. Real good,” he stated with conviction.
“Well, then. We’re both off to a good start.”
“You bet,” he said, planting a passionate kiss on my lips.
Living in t-shirts, jeans and summer dresses was a welcome change from the usual suit and formal wear I wore daily when at work. Being outdoors was a welcome change from being in and out of court, to and from the office.
When we ran out of supplies we headed back into town, mostly under the cover of night. One of the local shop owners who was already familiar with Daniel took to packing us up a bag of the things we usually bought, with a few extras. Blue Bell Ice Cream, Best Maid Pickles, and extra bottles of Dr. Pepper.
Daniel and I got along like a charm, which shouldn’t have come as a surprise. We were born under the same star, with our birthdays being only days apart. At times, he seemed to know me better than I knew myself. At times, I knew him better than he knew himself.
The five year age difference was but a number. His maturity infused me with a sense of responsibility and a sense of longing for permanence and a sense of belonging. To him. In our time together, I encouraged him to dream, encouraged him to surrender while throwing caution to the wind, and I encouraged him to love. We had found each other at a pivotal moment in time, and there was no going back to what either of us had known.
In the time away, I opened a new bank account, transferring funds out of my old one, which I suspected Duayne had access to, though it was not a joint account. When an address was needed, I used Daniel’s address. I also worked out a safety plan for my return. The plan involved cutting Duayne out of my life completely. A clean break. In the two weeks we spent at the lake house in Southern Texas, I maintained very little contact with the office. The third week we were away, I was offered a brief relating to the possible disbarring of a lawyer who’d allegedly misappropriated client funds and had missed crucial deadlines. Trial was not to commence for another four weeks, so I planned to hold off on concentrated work on the brief, at least for a few days. The appointed lead prosecutor on the case was Ernesto del Vasta, a sharp, unapologetically rigorous lawyer with a track record of securing convictions each and every time. Without fail, he managed to ensure that maximum penalties were imposed regardless of the defendant’s circumstances.
It was towards the end of that third week, one late afternoon on the drive back to the lake house, that Daniel suggested we head back. “I really enjoyed the time we shared, but we should be getting back. We can always do this again sometime?”
“In a heartbeat,” I told him.
“So, how do we do this?” he asked. “Go back to yours?”
“No,” I answered quickly. I was reluctant to go back to mine, under police guard or otherwise, fearing I would run into Duayne. I just wasn’t ready yet.
“We could change the locks?” he suggested.
“No. I’ll see if I can stay with Shania for the time being, then I’ll find myself someplace else to live.”
“Where does Shania stay?” he asked.
“Round Rock,” I told him.
“I see.” After a pause, he boldly suggested, “You can always stay with me. My place in Cedar Park has room enough for the both of us.”
“Sweet of you to offer, but no, you’ve done a lot already,” I told him.
“If not my place, we can go back to yours. Change the locks, set up a security system…”
“No,” I told him. “I’m not living there any longer. I’m not sure I can get over the fact that it was where things went down.”
“I see,” he replied softly. Reaching out for my hand, he stated, “So, there’s only one option now. You come stay with me.”
“Two other options actually,” I argued. “Staying at Shania’s or getting another place. Getting another place is probably the way to go,” I told him.
“Look, I know you want your independence and all, but with getting another place, you’ll probably be at my place most of the time or I’ll be at yours most of the time, so why don’t you just come and live with me?” he proposed.
I smiled in response. “That’s very presumptuous of you, Mr. Brennan.”
“What, the prediction that you’ll be at my place all the time?” he asked, grinning widely.
“Yes, that and then some.”
“Well, it isn’t a presumption if it’s true now, is it?” he questioned.
“I guess not,” I replied, a little excited at the prospect of me spending more time with him.
“Plus, you’re not getting rid of me that easily.”
“Who said anything about getting rid of you?” I asked.
“Anything’s possible, what with you being mysterious and all,” he joked.
I smiled, feeling so deeply in love with this man, but not wanting to let on how much. A little mystery wouldn’t hurt the relationship, I told myself.
3
THE RETURN
Daniel drove me in to work on Monday morning. “Call me when you’re done,” he insisted. “Try not to miss me too much.”
“Daniel. My world doesn’t revolve around you.”
“It should,” he joked.
“Yeah, yeah,” I replied, planting a full kiss on his lips. “Keep yourself out of trouble.”
“Trouble’s my middle name,” he announced.
“Oh is it now? I thought your middle name was Josiah.”
After a pause where he presumably reflected on my statement, he stated, “You killed it.”
I threw my head back in laughter. “Sorry Daniel, you know I love you,” I said, words escaping my lips long before I intended them to.
“Do you now?” he asked. “Guess what. I love you more,” he declared.
Love. My heart fluttered at the thought. This man, this life, this love. A far cry from where I’d been before, where I had to beg for the affection of a man wh
o never intended to give me more than crumbs of loving.
“Okay, better get in there quick before you give them something else to talk about,” he advised. “I miss you already,” he said, squeezing my hand as I stepped out of the car.
“I’ll be back in your arms before you know it,” I promised, blowing him a kiss before turning and heading into the office building I’d last seen weeks ago.
Pete, the security guard at the front desk greeted me as he usually did, as though I had not been away. His brown hair was slicked back as it usually was, his uniform crisply ironed. Time had stood still for me, yet things here had gone on without me.
I didn’t have my swipe card on me. It was with all the other belongings I had at my place.
“I haven’t got my card,” I advised.
“Rules is rules,” he stated. “But I’ll let you in this time, like every other time, which is like never. You always have your card with you. I’ll let you in today. Just because.” He smiled broadly, a twinkle in his chestnut brown eyes as though I’d made his day just by talking to him.
“Thanks Pete,” I said.
“Good to see you’re alright,” he said as a side note. “Just have to clear security here and I’ll let you through,” he promised.
“Thanks Pete. Appreciate your concern,” I replied as I put my belongings on the security scanner’s conveyor belt.
My bag went through fine, but Rochelle, the guard on the other end asked if she could search it.
“You’ve got a bottle of some sort in there?” she asked.
I’d forgotten the glass bottle of sparkling water in my bag. “Oops, sorry, I forgot I had it.”
“Don’t worry about it,” she said. “It’ll be here waiting for you on your way out.”
Pete scanned open the glass doors and I thanked him. I made a mental note to myself to get another security pass made up for me before the end of the day.
“See you next time,” he stated. I gave him a quick wave in response.
My Dusk My Dawn Page 4