by Trina Solet
Trevor was still reluctant though. "I don't want to take advantage."
"You're not. Jamie isn't the great conversationalist you would think he is. It's all, 'Dad, are you listening?' And then he pulls on my sleeve. That makes it really hard to drink coffee. I need Zane to distract him."
Jamie looked like he wasn't sure what to make of all that, but he agreed that Trevor and Zane should come to breakfast with them.
Trevor looked from Diego to Jamie, both of them so eager for him and Zane to join them. "I guess we could go," he said and looked really shy about accepting the invitation.
"Zane, we're gonna have pancakes," Jamie said, all excited that they had company for breakfast.
"The best place is The Golden Stack Pancake House. Their pancakes are the fluffiest," Diego said as they all walked down the stairs. "But as far as Jamie is concerned, there is no such thing as a bad pancake. Right?" he turned to Jamie who was walking down the steps cautiously while holding Diego's hand.
"They're bad when you burn them," Jamie said.
"I was trying to forget about that, but I guess you won't let me." Diego pouted. "Yours is too young to complain," he said to Trevor.
"He refuses to open his mouth, turns his head or spits it up," Trevor said while coming down the stairs behind them with Zane in his arms.
"I guess they're never too young," Diego said while looking behind him and seeing Zane grinning at him. "Look at him, so proud of his mischief. Jamie was already almost three when I met him so I don't know how babies are," Diego said and looked down at Jamie.
"You don't know about babies, Dad?" Jamie asked almost like he thought Diego might know everything. He then looked back at Trevor. "You know about babies?"
"Sure I do, I've known Zane since he was born. He's my cousin."
"Zane is a cousin, Dad," Jamie said and looked at the little boy again.
"You'll be a cousin too as soon as your Uncle Arturo gets around to having some kids," Diego assured him.
"Tell him. Tell him to have some kids," Jamie said.
"OK," Diego said. He stopped at the last landing before they reached the lobby and got out his phone. "Here we go. I'm texting him, 'Hurry up and have some kids. Jamie wants to be a cousin.'" He said as he typed it up.
"When?" Jamie asked like Arturo's still nonexistent kids were supposed to come over and play any minute.
"I'm sure he'll get right on that when he wakes up at noon or 2:00 pm. He's still in college," Diego told Trevor. Once again he noticed how young he was. "You look like you're about the same age as him," Diego said as they continued to walk downstairs.
"I just turned twenty-one."
"Close enough."
"I'm four," Jamie volunteered and raised four fingers.
They all stepped outside and squinted at the morning sunlight. Diego stopped for a minute to take in the sunshine and the leaves shimmering in the light breeze. Growing in a line along the sidewalk, the trees were still young and didn't give much shade.
"It's a nice day isn't it," he said. The sun was shining off the boys' hair. "Look at these blond boys." Diego noticed that Zane's hair was strawberry blond while Jamie's was a darker blond.
Jamie touched his hair then looked at Zane and from him to Trevor and Diego. "Everyone's hair is good."
"We're a bunch of handsome guys," Diego agreed. "Let's go have pancakes." He had such a good feeling as all four of them headed down Barlow Street. A morning stroll with two kids and a gorgeous guy by his side then pancakes – this was the life.
They grabbed a table at the Golden Stack, one of the few that were free. The advertising posters near the register had a cartoon mouse hiding behind a giant stack of pancakes while holding a giant fork. Jamie pointed him out to Zane. "Look at him. He's going to try and eat all those pancakes."
While sitting on Trevor's lap, Zane was more interested in trying to grab anything that was in front of him. Trevor gave him a soft toy that had something rattling inside it. Zane examined it for a while. When Zane started to bang it on the table, it made only enough noise to keep him happy but not enough to disturb anyone. Good choice.
Meanwhile, Diego and Jamie were sitting across from them and reading the menu together. When the waitress stopped at their table, Jamie ordered for both of them. Afterward he managed to look both proud and shy about his accomplishment.
"You're getting to be a real pro at ordering pancakes," Diego told him and saw Trevor smile at both of them. "Look, you impressed Trevor."
Now both Trevor and Jamie looked a little shy.
When their order arrived, Zane got a pancake of his own from Trevor's plate.
"No syrup?" Jamie said seeing that Zane's pancake was plain.
"Watch what he's doing with it," Trevor pointed out to him.
"He's smushing it," Jamie said as he saw that Zane was demolishing his pancake in his tiny fists.
"If he had syrup, he would get all sticky."
"He had some of the pancake," Jamie said when he saw that instead of just mashing it Zane stuck a piece in his mouth. "Is it good?" he asked then he turned to Diego and found that he was busy on his phone.
"Don't play on the phone, Dad. Pancakes are dad and son time," Jamie complained then he noticed Zane slobbering on his second bite of pancake. "He likes pancakes too, Dad."
Diego put away his phone. "Sorry about that. I work from home. I have ever since I got Jamie. So I have to keep up with things," he explained to Trevor.
"What do you do?" Trevor asked.
"I work for a nonprofit this group of tech CEOs started to promote science education. We get tech companies to sponsor events like contests, and special programs like science camp for kids in low income areas. My job is to prod the companies to fork over the dough and anything else we can use. Official title Resource Coordinator, but I'm a glorified telemarketer," Diego said then he decided he had talked enough about himself. "Where do you work?"
"Dundee Lighting Emporium," Trevor said with a shrug like his job wasn't worth talking about at all.
Diego disagreed. "That place is right around the corner. But the job is only part time?"
"I'm hoping my job goes from part time to full time soon. Mr. Dundee hinted that it might when he hired me. I've been working on improving our online ordering to show him I'm worth it, but he only believes in brick and mortar," Trevor said.
"He is going to get steamrolled. You said our building was pricey, so how come you moved here?"
Trevor cleared up some crumbs Zane had made and offered him a piece of pancake to eat. "The apartment was a little out of my price range, but I wanted to impress the child services people so I can keep Zane. I have temporary custody since my aunt passed away. I want permanent custody and this neighborhood has a park, daycare, preschools. Where I lived before was kind of grubby and not child friendly."
"Probably like every place I lived a few years ago, but I only had myself to worry about back then." Diego looked over at Jamie who was pointing out to Zane which piece of pancake he should eat next.
"This one. This is good," Jamie told him.
Diego smiled. "I've never seen Jamie with any little kids. He surprises me."
"He's good with Zane. I didn't know little kids could be so patient," Trevor said and smiled at the two little guys.
"I'm seeing a new side to him," Diego said in wonder. He was always making new discoveries about his little boy.
"You said you didn't know him when he was a baby," Trevor said.
"I adopted Jamie from his grandfather," Diego smiled sadly and looked over at Jamie.
Trevor nodded as if he instantly understood what Diego wasn't saying, that there was something about the circumstances that wasn't easy to talk about in front of Jamie. His grandfather knew he didn't have long to live and needed someone to adopt his grandson. That sad fact is how Diego became a dad. Then there was Simon and how he failed both him and Jamie.
But Diego didn't want to dwell on him when he was sitting across from someone li
ke Trevor. He noted how quiet and thoughtful Trevor was, and also kind of mesmerizing. But he wasn't a date sitting across from him in some dimly lit restaurant. Diego couldn't just blurt out to him, "God, you're beautiful," then take him to a motel room, fuck him and forget him.
Chapter 3
At some point while they spent time together, Trevor became pretty sure that Diego was gay. It started out as a question, but it turned into almost a sure thing. Maybe it was in the way he leaned over to whisper in Trevor's ear, getting right in his personal space with no hesitation.
It happened while they were taking a walk around the neighborhood after breakfast. The nearness of Diego's body as it was almost touching his made Trevor shiver and grow short of breath. And all that happened was that Diego told him that there was a really good pediatric dentist down the block.
Apparently Jamie was deathly afraid of dentists though he had hardly ever been to one. Diego said some other kid had scared him with horror stories. That was the kind of thing they talked about, but the whole time Trevor felt like some kind of tension was ratcheting up. It was like Diego was becoming more attractive and irresistible with every minute they spent together.
Trevor's gaze was drawn to his lips. He would have bet anything that Diego was a great kisser. He could imagine his fingers closing around fistfuls of Trevor's hair. If he was brave enough to touch this man, what would it be like? It would be too much for Trevor to handle. He wasn't very experienced and he wasn't exactly a hunk especially next to someone like Diego.
To run his hands over Diego's strong body, starting with those broad shoulders then down the biceps that bulged every time he moved was just a fantasy. Diego was the kind of guy Trevor could stare at for hours if he had been posed in a photo. He could let his fantasies play out. But in real life, he couldn't stare and let his imagination run wild.
Most of all Trevor couldn't stare at those dark eyes for too long. The intensity in Diego's eyes made him freeze up, hold his breath and lose his head. He could picture that look in dim lighting, seen close up as that body hovered above him and Diego's luscious mouth swooped in for a kiss.
For the next few days, Trevor tried to put Diego out of his mind as anything but a kind neighbor. Trevor had no business noticing hot guys right now. He had one mission in life and that was getting custody of Zane. Thinking of that terrible uncertainty, he envied Diego his peace of mind, knowing that Jamie was his and no one would take him away.
Despite telling himself to knock it off and stop obsessing about Diego, Trevor found himself wondering when he would run into him again. If he and Zane went for a walk or to the store, it might happen sooner rather than later. What was he thinking trying to arrange running into a guy he had sworn he would stop thinking about?
He didn't need to get involved with anyone, not even someone as sexy and nice as Diego. His love life could wait until things with Zane's custody were settled. Not that Diego wanted to get involved with him either. They just happen to be two neighbors with kids.
Around the time when he knew Diego would be picking up Jamie from school, he was tempted to just step outside, maybe go check the mail before it even arrived or something. He stayed put and helped Zane with his chunky numbers puzzle. Mostly Zane just liked to bang the puzzle pieces on the coffee table.
In the early evening when the mail did arrive, Trevor took Zane to go get it and noticed that the box for number 608 was still full. Now he wanted to hang around, a maybe sort his mail right there. There was a trashcan by the mailboxes for that very purpose. Might as well.
Zane got a kick out of the junk mail, but Trevor saw no sign of Diego while he lingered there. Trevor marched himself back to his apartment. He was acting like a dumb kid with a crush, hanging out by a guy's locker. He might be only a few years from being a high school kid, but he had no excuse for acting that way.
Instead of giving in to the temptation to arrange a run in with Diego, Trevor decided to clean up and pick up all the things Zane scattered while crawling around the apartment. Right now Zane was jumping in his playpen, waiting for his dinner. Trevor had it going in the kitchen. It was too early for Trevor to eat, but Zane ate early so he did too. That was as it should be. His life was about Zane.
As he was straightening up, he heard voices just outside his apartment door. It was Diego and Jamie, and Jamie was asking, "Which one? Is this one Trevor's and Zane's? Is it? It has a six like our door, and it has a zero and a two."
Trevor heard Diego answer, "Good eye. That's 602."
Since he heard them, Trevor couldn't ignore them. On impulse, he decided to open the door.
"It's Trevor!" Jamie said looking happy to see him.
"Hey, looks like you were right," Diego said to him.
"Good afternoon, guys. I was just on the other side of the door and I heard you," Trevor explained. Maybe he was a little too eager opening the door just because he heard their voices. He hoped Diego wouldn't think he was weird.
"We didn't mean to disturb you. Jamie was proving to me that he was good with numbers," Diego told him.
"Is Zane in there?" Jamie asked and peered inside.
"He is. He's in his playpen right now," Trevor said. "Do you want to come in and say hi to him?"
"Are we visiting?" Jamie asked his Dad eagerly.
"Guess so. We can't stop by and not say hi to Zane," Diego said and Jamie started to wipe his feet.
"When we visit, we have to wipe our feet," Jamie said as he kept at it for a while.
"You're done now. Good job wiping your feet. You can go in," Diego told him.
They walked right into a small living room that only had enough space for a couch, a coffee table, a small TV cabinet and a playpen where Zane was. Trevor's TV was way smaller and older than Diego was probably used to, but Trevor didn't know why he was worrying about that.
Was he picturing them watching TV together and snuggling on the couch? Trevor knew his place didn't look like much, but it's not like he wanted to impress Diego. Except he kind of did. Too bad for him, his place would impress no one.
Seeing the two of them come in, Zane was no longer satisfied to stay in his playpen. He raised his arms to be picked up and clamored to be release from his little prison.
Jamie went over to him and asked, "Can I pick him up?"
"It might be fun to see him try," Diego said to Trevor, but to Jamie he said, "Not yet. Give it a few years."
Trevor picked up Zane. "Look, Zane, we have guests."
Jamie said hi to him and a whole lot of waving started.
"I better check on some food actually," Trevor said remembering what he had cooking. The small kitchen was right off the living room and Trevor carried Zane in there. Diego and Jamie followed him in. "If you guys watch Zane, I can set him down. I can't let him go where he wants in the kitchen. It's child proofed but he likes to fiddle with everything in here."
"I'll watch him," Jamie volunteered.
"We'll watch him together," Diego said.
Trevor set Zane down by the kitchen table and he was thrilled to be there and grabbed onto a chair right away. He banged on the seat of the chair then moved on to the next one.
"Look at him toddling all over the place," Diego said as he watched Zane go from holding on to one chair to another.
"He can walk," Jamie said.
"As long as he holds on to something, he can," Trevor told him. "And he loves those chairs because he can push them around. He likes to hide under them and peek out at me. He has even tried climbing on them."
"Who needs toys?" Diego said, alarming his son.
"Kids need toys, Dad," Jamie said urgently.
"I don't know about that. Zane loves any kind of box. A cereal box can keep him busy for hours," Trevor said.
He noticed that Diego was looking at the kitchen table and the rubber guards on the corners. Kitchen cabinets were held together with rubber bands. Trevor had bought some proper cabinet and drawer locks. He just needed to put them on. The rubber bands were Za
ne-proof, so they did work. But he was worried his jury-rigged safety measures wouldn't pass muster with the child services people.
Diego checked out the rubber bands. "I bet Zane has fun with these."
"He does. I think he'll miss them when I put the real things. A social worker is going to be making a home visit the day after tomorrow. I don't want to take any chances."
"You want me to put them on for you. I'm a pro. I removed and donated our old ones, just kept the ones on the cabinet with cleaning supplies. I don't want Jamie to start cleaning when I'm not looking," Diego joked.
Trevor wasn't going to accept his offer, but the cabinet locks were sitting right there on top of the microwave. Diego got busy with them and they both kept an eye on the boys. Jamie was playing with Zane, hiding behind a chair then popping up to make him laugh.
"What's cooking?" Diego asked when Trevor opened a pot to check if the water was boiling.
"I'm making some pasta and carrots for Jamie. The pasta is for me too. Do you guys want to stay and eat with us? There's plenty. I'm just going to throw some sauce on the spaghetti." As he made the offer, Trevor was already trying to think of something else he might add to make the dinner more worthwhile for his guests.
"We don't want to impose," Diego said but Jamie contradicted him.
"I want to watch Zane eat spaghetti."
"I should treat you guys to something better since you treated us to breakfast," Trevor said. Plus Diego was putting in the cabinet locks for him. There weren't that many so he was almost done.
"We like spaghetti just fine. Right?" Diego turned to Jamie who nodded. "OK. We'll stay for dinner, but you have to let me contribute. I have two steaks in the fridge. I'll bring them over."
"Steaks?" Trevor said.
"You don't hate steaks, do you?" Diego asked.
"Me and dad like steaks because we're guys," Jamie said.