Sure it is. It isn’t his mind that’s been usurped by a clinically sound but foreign personality. He’s not the idiot who signed off on it. I did.
I have fucked up plenty in the past, but this might be the most colossal of them all. Prophets forgive me.
November 19
Mom has been calm since her crying jag. She’s pleasant to all, her jabs at Kini downright friendly. Again, fairly typical behavior from her after a depressive episode. The one thing that’s different is how quieter she tends to be. She’s thinking hard. About what, I can’t imagine. Or maybe I can and just don’t want to.
It feels as if fate is holding its breath before unleashing the next storm on our heads. I’m being paranoid, but hey, I’m Shalia Monroe. I’ve earned the privilege to be paranoid when life quiets down.
I still regret having her undergo the surgery. I’ve toyed with the idea of having Meyso remove the regulator in her brain. If Mom won’t change, and if she feels worse because she no longer recognizes herself, what’s the point of this at all? Yet Kini is ecstatic over what he feels has been a major breakthrough, and I know he’ll argue vehemently against returning her to Eve one-point-oh again. He may even resort to legal means to prevent it from happening. I figure if we give it a few weeks and she doesn’t improve, I’ll have more of a case for undoing the wrong. For now, it’s wait-and-see.
More crappy news came today. Elwa and her clan are going home to the capital city tomorrow.
“It’s time,” she told me when I saw her at the clinic today. “Eve has turned a corner. The worst is behind you. And you desperately need more space with Clan Aslada without extra people looking over your shoulder. Theirs is a worthy clan. You need the opportunity to explore the facets of your relationship.”
“I doubt I would have survived these last few weeks without you.” I wasn’t exaggerating in the least. “I’ll miss having you around.”
“I’m as close as your com,” Elwa insisted, hugging me to her side. “When you return to the Matara Complex, we’ll practically be neighbors. That standing date to have dinner every other week still applies when you return, by the way. No excuses, young lady.”
Clan Aslada showed their gratitude for all Elwa had done by giving her and her clan a grand dinner celebration tonight. The great cavernous dining hall was dressed to the nines, with fine tableware and festive decorations. Each dish served was exquisite, created by some celebrity chef from the other continent. No king in a palace filled with lords and ladies ever had a more sumptuous and rich banquet. It was over the top, but the room was filled with laughter and stories. I was able to forget the distress of Mom’s recovery in those hours during which we toasted each other and made Anrel giggle as she was passed among her adoring fans.
I hate to see Clan Serndi leave, but they have their own lives to lead. That they came at all means a lot to me. It turns out they weren’t just there so Elwa could lend support to me and Mom. Quiet asides with Serndi, Hilon, and Alfra revealed they’d been keeping an eye on how I was treated by Clan Aslada.
Dramok Serndi summed up their appraisal best. “A worthy clan, Shalia. You have a few issues to work out with them, as any woman embarking on a new relationship would. We don’t feel there are any matters that can’t be overcome with patience and understanding. If love should spark in your heart for these men, then you should answer its call and join Aslada’s clan. They’ll do right by you and Anrel.”
A resounding endorsement, which I trust. Once I can settle my mind about Mom, I’ll do my best to concentrate on discovering if I do have a future with Clan Aslada.
November 20
A sad morning followed by an amazing afternoon. Ah well, that’s life, isn’t it? Bad to make the good that much sweeter.
Saying goodbye to Betra’s parents was hard. I hadn’t fully realized until this morning how I’d come to rely on Elwa running interference between me and Mom. I admit to feeling terrified to have to cope without her advice and strength to bolster me.
She did leave me with a last nugget of wisdom before boarding the shuttle that would take her home. Pulling me aside as she snuggled Anrel goodbye, Elwa said, “You’ve been strong before. You’ll be strong now. Both with your mother and Clan Aslada.”
I looked at her in surprise. “Is there some issue about the boys you don’t like?”
She chuckled. “They are wonderful men. They deserve any chance you can give them to prove themselves. In fact, I believe they have proven themselves in many ways already. I can tell you care for them.”
I nodded. “I can picture a future with them as my mates and Anrel’s fathers.”
“They would do well by you. Don’t get swept up in the moment or the material things they can offer you and this gorgeous child. You don’t have to compromise yourself, so don’t.”
I gazed over at the men, talking and laughing with Elwa’s clanmates. A rush of affection and desire warmed me. “It’s not come to that at any point.”
“Good. You should never lose yourself or your values to make a relationship happen that shouldn’t.” Her eyes twinkled. “Remember not to discount them immediately when trouble arises either. Those three have strong personalities, as do you. You’ll be at odds from time to time. If you use those challenging moments to grow as a clan and not tear each other apart, it’ll work out fine.”
She kissed Anrel and me goodbye. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t have to wipe a few tears as the shuttle disappeared into the distance.
A check on Mom’s schedule showed she was in physical rehab, so we went to Clan Aslada’s hill mansion. The men picked up on my blue mood. They decided to shake me out of it.
Aslada summoned Snoy to take Anrel to the nursery, where a new shipment of toys had just been unpacked. They are spoiling my kid to the extreme with the goodies. No child has had so many toys to play with. I’m not even sure Anrel can spend more than five minutes with each toy and get to them all before she’s a teenager. It’s crazy how the guys dote on my little girl.
And me. As soon as Anrel was whisked away, Jaon slung me over his shoulder. Over my admittedly weak and not-heartfelt protests, we were off to the playroom.
I know I’ve mentioned the room was vast. I’m not sure I’ve seen all that’s in it yet. During the previous visit, I had noticed the strange setup of a thick, pillowy square of fabric, like a comforter, with two smooth logs at either end. This was in a raised alcove, with three undecorated walls making it almost a separate room apart from the larger play area. I’d wondered about the bizarre tableau, particularly the logs. What place did they have in the playroom? I’d been kept too distracted to ask about it before.
This was where Jaon carried me. He set me down so I lounged in the middle of the comforter.
“Computer, vid a hilltop view,” Aslada said as he and Meyso joined us.
I gasped as the three walls and ceiling disappeared, replaced by scenery that must have been from the peak of a hill the mansion resided in. Blue skies with a few clouds scudding overhead stretched as far as the eye could see. Beyond the comforter was a stretch of lush grass. A massive tree loomed nearby, casting its shadow to the side. The only thing missing was the breeze I saw fluttering the sapphire-blue leaves.
The men sank down around me, settling on the comforter. “Wow.” I looked everywhere. “This is certainly different. And amazing.”
Aslada used a log as support to lean against. He motioned me over. I crawled to him, happy to nestle between his legs, my back against his chest, my head pillowed on his shoulder. I sighed and relaxed, enjoying this delightful oasis in the middle of the somewhat dungeon-like playroom.
Aslada shifted me a little before letting his hot hand burrow beneath my blouse. It slipped up my abdomen and tugged my bra up, freeing my breasts so he could cup their naked weight in his palm. As if given a signal, my nipples stiffened into eager points. My pussy went wet for him and the other two watching us. I’m so damned easy. With Aslada, Meyso, and Jaon, I don’t care. I’ll be eas
y for them anytime, anywhere.
His other hand slid against the crotch of my slacks, claiming his right to touch wherever he pleased. I trembled, my legs falling slightly apart in surrender to his unspoken demand.
“Your stay has been filled with stress,” Aslada said in a careful tone. “We’ve managed a few precious hours here and there, but not nearly enough. Now the territory government is about to go into session, and I’ll be spending long hours at work. Meyso has patients to treat, and Jaon must also return to his job.”
I tensed, wondering if we weren’t going to pursue our clanning potential after all. I looked up at him. He shook his head with a gentle smile.
“I am not blaming you for how our relationship has gone so far. I hope you don’t blame us either. Can we try this again? When your mother is better and we can spend real time with you and Anrel? My schedule runs by quarters, so if you don’t mind delaying judgment on our compatibility until we can have a real holiday, say in about ten weeks?”
I relaxed again. Well, as much as his busy hands and my wakening libido would allow me to relax. Far from giving me up as a decent Matara, Aslada was asking me to give his clan a second round, when we could concentrate on each other exclusively.
I beamed, adoring him for thinking me worth the effort. “Of course I want to give this another try. You three have been wonderful through all of this. I can’t begin to express my gratitude.”
There were relieved smiles all around. Meyso sighed, “Thank the ancestors you’re not evaluating us on so little. It’s been a real concern to us.”
“It shouldn’t be. You’re an amazing bunch of men. I can’t believe you’re not ready to pitch me out.”
Jaon’s eyes widened. “Not for a second, lovely.”
Aslada rubbed my breasts, making exciting tingles race through my body. “Then it’s settled. We return to our duties in another week. You and Anrel will remain here for the duration of Matara Eve’s recovery. We’ll spend what we can carve out for ourselves until the end of the quarter break. Then we’ll immerse ourselves in discovering all we can about each other.”
“Will Mom be far enough along by then?” I asked Meyso.
“Given her change in attitude these last couple of days, it is likely. Her physical therapist reports she could be moved to a residence that is dedicated solely to rehabilitation. There is a facility nearby that also offers continued psychological counseling. It’s more of a resort feel and less like a medical facility. It’s got all sorts of luxurious amenities. She’ll love it. We were planning to discuss it with her tomorrow.”
I was delighted to hear she was improved to the point of moving out of the clinic. “That’s great news, Meyso. Mom will be thrilled to get out of a hospital-type atmosphere.”
“I suggest we celebrate this wonderful development.” Aslada’s voice rumbled in my ear.
His pinch to my nipple made my girlie bits clench. He moved to the other and pinched more insistently. I was jolted as pain and delight zapped straight to my clit. I moaned and thrust my chest up, silently begging for more.
Aslada’s chuckle trembled my bones. Good night, the man’s every move had my nerves alert. He rubbed my pussy to make me writhe against him. His erections pressed hard against my lower spine.
“Does my pretty Earther want to play?” he murmured before his teeth nipped my earlobe. I made another helpless sound, wondering at how even the least touch made my insides churn with need. Aslada could damned near play me like a violin at this stage.
And he had thought I was ready to bolt on them? The man had no idea how enthralling he and his clanmates were.
With practiced ease, he pulled at the re-sealable crotch seam of my pants. They purred open, displaying the lace of pristine white panties. Aslada ignored their prim appearance, shoving his hand in so that his fingers slid through the folds of my pussy. I arched into the contact, my body crackling with anticipation.
“So wet for me,” he breathed, rubbing back and forth before pushing a finger inside.
I melted, boneless for an instant until he pinched my nipple hard. The warring sensations of hurt and delight made me hyperaware. I could feel every throb of my pulse in my clit, avid from the contact with Aslada’s palm. I was succumbing to bliss, my will shattering against the unperturbable strength of the Dramok.
He pawed my breasts, delivering enjoyment and torment in equal measure. He pumped my sex a few strokes before his finger pulled out, spreading moisture over my petals and clit. I cried out at the lightning strike of elation to be touched on that most sensitive place.
Aslada’s finger and thumb closed over the swollen nub, seizing it with an implacable grip. He rubbed it up and down, then swept his thumb over the tip. Then more friction on either side before another goading swipe. I had a death grip on his thighs, holding on as climax announced its nearness with billowing exhilaration. My whole body shook, readying for explosion. As it was about to crest, his fingers stilled. Stopped.
I quaked in his embrace, feeling orgasm retreat with regret. I knew he wouldn’t let me have release so easily. Aslada enjoyed demonstrating dominance when we were intimate. That usually meant a lot of teasing, a lot of near-climaxes, and a lot of proving I was his to enjoy. In the grand scheme of things, I adored these encounters. I adored how he pushed me to submit to him, even when I begged for release. The testing itself drove me out of my skull with frustration, but I knew in the end, if I was sweet and submissive, he would reward me. He always did.
I didn’t protest his abrupt stopping or my missed orgasm. I lay between his legs and against his chest, suffering from the need gnawing at my belly. When he started to play with me again, as I knew he would, I let him drive me to that peak where I could feel the nearness of sensual rapture. Again, he stopped before I could realize what I moaned for, refusing me.
All was to be done in Aslada’s time, at his command. Over and over, he tormented me with pleasure that wasn’t to be fully finished. My pussy and clit and tits became the focus of my attention, the places where he tortured me. I was reduced to a trembling, needful mass of desire.
At last he asked, “Do you want me, sweet girl?”
My usual snarky “well, duh” response was nowhere to be found. I moaned with all the feeling in the world, “Yes, Dramok. Please.”
“You may get on top of me.”
That was a surprise. Aslada was not the type to hand over any sort of control, including the illusion of it. But I was dying for him. I turned to face him.
“Clothes off first.” He opened his trousers. His cocks damned near leapt out, heavy and glistening with desire. For me.
My clothes went flying with enough enthusiasm that I heard Meyso and Jaon chuckle behind me. Aslada didn’t laugh, however. His dark gaze riveted on me, watching with enough smolder to light a forest fire.
Naked, I crawled towards him, ending by straddling his hips, hovering over his shafts. I ached to impale myself with him, but I waited instead, needing permission. I was on top, but he was in command.
A smile drifted over his too-kissable lips as he reached beneath me to position himself. “At my pace, precious pretty. Take me into you, slowly.”
I obeyed, easing down on him. His primary nudged through my folds, our combined wetness letting him slip within effortlessly. My womanhood convulsed, and my breath caught.
More of that knowing smile. The sense of his power grew. “You’ll take my cocks with that hungry pussy and ass. Keep going, precious. Good girl.”
His smaller shaft nudged its target, insisting on having its place too. I relaxed into how it stretched me, opening me for Aslada. Filling me, inch by inch, both lengths forged in until I sat on his groin, my legs trembling at the feeling of Aslada stuffed inside me. He was not small by any means.
“Lovely,” he breathed, his eyes sliding closed as he exulted in the moment. “So very good.”
His lids lifted so he could pierce me with that unwavering stare again. He slid his hands up my thighs, not st
opping until they framed my sex. He stroked either side of my clit with his thumbs, and I spasmed around him. Sweet prophets, the lightest touch felt akin to a force of nature. I realized I was holding onto his shoulders, my nails digging into his skin.
I jerked my hands away. “I’m sorry, Dramok.”
“Hold on all you wish. As hard as you need. Feeling your passion for me is exhilarating.”
Thank goodness, because I needed to hold onto something. I throbbed to have him within me, to have him stroking my clit with that soft, lazy touch that was so profound.
“You may fuck me,” he said, his voice languorous with satisfaction. “Slowly, to start with.”
I eased upwards, crying out at the delicious friction that coiled my guts tight. Damn, it was exquisite to have Aslada moving inside.
I rose up until I was in danger of losing him. I settled down, reveling in my own sensitivity. He rubbed all the right parts in and out. Up again. And down. Rising and falling in slow motion, giving him the leisurely fuck he desired, though I was burning to take him like a jackhammer.
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