by J. E. Parker
I stopped in front of her.
Inches separated her chest from mine.
“Brantley,” she whispered, her eyes searching my face. “What’s wrong? Is everything—”
Her words died on her tongue when I cupped her face in my hands and tilted her head back. The kids fell silent. “Nothing is wrong.”
“Then what in the world—”
“I’m sorry, Firecracker.”
Confusion swept over her face. “For what?”
“For not seeing the truth sooner. For not—”
“Daddy, are you gonna kiss, Clara?” Bella asked, giggling.
“Eww,” Declan said, gagging. “That’s gross.”
A second later, Liam piped up. “Why would he kiss Mom? He’s not her boyfriend.”
Not yet, I mentally replied.
“Me and you,” I continued, dropping my hands, “are going to talk later.”
Nostrils flaring, Clara stepped back and turned, opening the backdoor of my Range Rover. She rested her head against the tinted glass as the kids climbed in, one by one. Liam gave me a pointed look, his assessing eyes glued to my face before disappearing inside behind Bella.
It was obvious he didn’t trust me, and I understood why.
Kid has every right to be suspicious.
When the kids were in my SUV and buckled, Clara shut the door and looked back at me. Shaking her head, she whispered, “I feel like I’m in the twilight zone. Honest to God, I’m waiting for aliens to swoop down and abduct me or something.”
Just looking at her beautiful face made my chest tighten.
“Get in the car, baby.”
When she didn’t move, I walked toward her and opened the passenger-side door. Resting my hand on her lower back, I urged her to get in. “Come on, Clara. We need to get going.”
She blew out a small breath and leaned back against the open door. “Why does it feel like when I get in this car that everything will change?”
“Because it will.”
She chewed on her bottom lip. “You’re not planning on kidnapping us, are you?” Despite trying to be funny, I heard the fear lining her voice.
“No,” I replied, rubbing my fingers over her lower back. “But I am about to steal something from you.”
“Oh really?” She quirked a single brow. “And what’s that?”
I remained silent as I guided her into the car. Once she was seated, I pulled the seat belt across her, securing it in place. Before I could lean back and stand up straight, Clara grabbed the front of my shirt, holding me in place.
“Answer me, Brantley,” she whispered. “What are you going to steal?”
My eyes met hers and my pulse quickened. “Your heart.” She gasped, but I didn’t stop. “It may not be today, and it may not be tomorrow, bella dama, but one day soon I’m going to steal your heart right out of your chest.”
“Brantley, I—”
“And once I hold it in my hands, Clara, I’m never giving it back.”
I didn’t wait for her to respond before backing out of the car and shutting the door. Tilting my head back, I looked up at the afternoon sky, and sent up a silent prayer.
Dear God, I prayed. Please don’t let me fuck this up.
Clara
My apartment was a disaster.
Pizza boxes, empty coke cans, and crushed juice boxes covered the coffee table that Brantley, Isabella, the boys, and I sat around holding Uno cards in our hands. Puzzle pieces and GI Joes were strewn across the sofa behind me, and the most well-constructed blanket fort I’d ever seen sat in the corner of the room next to the muted TV.
It looked like a category five hurricane had made landfall in my living room, leaving nothing but destruction in its wake. It would take me forever to clean up, but I didn’t care. The chaos surrounding me was worth the smiles plastered across all three kids’ faces.
Seeing Brantley smile from ear-to-ear didn’t hurt either.
I liked his smile. A lot. It was the main reason I couldn’t stop staring at him. Well, that combined with the words he’d spoken earlier when we were leaving Grandmama’s house. Hours later, I still felt shell-shocked by the things he’d said after I climbed into his car.
I’m going to steal your heart…
Part of me wanted those words to be true so badly I ached. But the other part—the rational part—knew he didn’t mean them. Men like Brantley simply didn’t fall for women like me.
Someone as beautiful as him will never love someone as broken as me.
Tears burned my eyes at the thought.
Pull yourself together, the voice in my head snapped.
“Alright,” I said to Declan, forcing a smile. “It’s your turn, baby boy.”
He hummed as he looked between the two cards he held in his hand. One was a green number four, and the other was a draw four. He looked at Bella, lifting his chin in the air. “What card do you have?” Declan asked her, teasing. “Is it red?”
Bella smiled and bounced on the pillow she was sitting on. “I’m not telling, Dec,” she replied. “That’s cheating.”
Brantley coughed into the bend of his arm, hiding his chuckle. He, along with everyone else at the table knew Bella’s remaining card was blue. She’d haphazardly flashed it more than once.
“Hmm…” Declan tapped his finger on his chin as he stared at the draw four card clutched between his fingers. I sucked in a breath, waiting to see if he would put it down, making Bella draw four cards. If he did, she’d likely lose since everyone else was down to one and two cards.
Declan’s eyes flitted back to Bella. He blew out a breath and started to throw down the draw four card. I closed my eyes. I didn’t want to see Bella’s reaction. She was as competitive as her Uncle Evan at most things, and I doubted she’d taking losing too well, especially when it was Declan who dealt the killing blow.
Oh dear Lord. She’s going to flip—
Bella screamed, and I opened my eyes just in time to see her throw her blue card down onto the discard pile. She jumped up, her arms in the air. “I won!” she screamed loud enough to wake the dead. Throwing herself into Brantley, she wrapped her arms around his neck. “I won, Daddy!”
Confused, I looked at the three cards that Declan held in his hand. Not wanting Bella to hear me, I leaned close to him and whispered, “What did you do?” He’d obviously drawn another card instead of throwing down his draw four. I wanted to know why.
Declan shrugged. “I didn’t want her to cry, so I took another card. It’s no big deal.”
He was wrong. It was a big deal. At least to me it was.
Unable to stop myself, I ran my fingers through his air. “I’m proud of you, Dec. Like, really proud.”
He smiled. “I know.”
Liam yawned from where he sat opposite me. “I’m tired.”
I glanced down at my phone, checking the time.
9:06 pm, it said.
“What time does Bella go to bed?” I asked Brantley, who was holding Bella tight against him. “The boys are usually passed out by eight thirty.”
He kissed Bella on the forehead before turning her and placing her on his lap. She slammed her head back against his chest and laughed when he tickled her ribs. “Eight. She’s grumpy in the mornings if she doesn’t get enough sleep.” He tickled her again. More laughter followed. “Isn’t that right, princesa?”
“I don’t wanna go to sleep,” Bella answered around a fit of laughter. “I wanna play again.”
“Tomorrow,” Brantley said, giving her a look that left no room for argument. “Right now it’s time for you to brush your teeth and get ready for bed.”
With one last giggle, Bella climbed from her daddy’s lap and looked up at me. “Can I sleep with you, Clara? I don’t like the dark.”
Declan stood next. “You can sleep on the bottom bunk with me. I have an Optimus Prime nightlight in my room.”
“I love Optimus!” Bella squealed, shifting her weight between her feet. “But wait”—she said,
standing still—“what am I going to wear? I don’t got no clothes.”
“I don’t have any girl clothes,” Declan answered, curling his upper lip. He pointed at me. “Mama does though.”
I winked down at Bella. “I’ll find you something. Though”—I swung my gaze to Brantley—“I don’t think I have anything that will fit you.”
I may not have been a small woman, but even my loose-fitting shirts wouldn’t fit Brantley’s muscular frame. There was no way. Besides, I didn’t see him as someone who would wear women’s clothing. Even to sleep in.
“I’m good,” he replied, holding his hands up in a placating gesture. “Don’t get any ideas about dressing me in chick clothes.”
Shaking my head, I laughed and focused back on the kids. “Okay, you three. Time to brush your teeth.” I playfully waved my hand toward the bathroom. “Move it, little people. We don’t have all night. Your teeth are rotting out of your head as we speak after all the candy you turkeys have eaten today. Now go.”
All three kids turned and took off down the small hall that led to the bathroom.
I glanced at Brantley. “I’m going to find Bella something to sleep in and help them brush their teeth. I’ll be back in a few minutes.”
He stepped forward, ready to follow the kids. “I can get her. You don’t need to—”
I smacked his hand gently, making him freeze. “I know I don’t need to, but I want to, Brantley. I haven’t spent much time with her in the last few months. Please let me do this.
A look I couldn’t read crossed his face. He turned to the side and extended his arm. “Have at it, beautiful. Just tell me when she’s ready and I’ll come kiss her goodnight.” He smirked. “Can’t let you have all the fun, now can I?”
With a roll of my eyes, I sauntered after the kids.
When I felt Brantley’s heated gaze lock on my backside, I stopped and looked at him over my shoulder. “Are you going to stare at my butt every chance you get?”
His eyes never left my body as he replied, “I’m not even going to lie. Hell yes, I’m going to stare. I mean damn, Clara, how can I not? It’s just so—”
“Big?” I asked, interrupting him.
“I was going to say perfect, smartass.”
Tossing my head back, I laughed. When I’d stopped, I pointed at him with a single finger. “Behave, Pretty Boy,” I quipped. “I’ll holler for you when we’re ready.”
“Yes, ma’am,” he said, smiling. “I like it when you’re bossy.”
“Hmm,” I hummed. “Make sure you stick around then because I stay that way.”
He raked his tongue over his bottom lip. Although he did it a lot, the move never failed to make my toes curl. “Planning on it, bella dama. Always.”
Always… There’s that dang word again.
With a quick nod of my head, I walked down the hall towards the bathroom where the kids were cutting up and laughing like drunken hyenas.
Brantley’s eyes followed me the entire way.
I was tucking the kids into bed when Liam grabbed my wrist from the top bunk where he slept each night. “Mama,” he said. “You can sleep with me if you want to.”
I knew by the tone of his voice and the look of concern in his eyes that something was wrong. “Liam, baby, what’s wrong?” I asked, resting my chin against the bed rail. “You feel okay?” I placed my hand on his head, checking for a temperature.
He was as cool as a cucumber.
“I’m not sick.”
“Then what is it?”
“I don’t want you to be scared,” he answered quietly.
Confusion set in. “Why would I be scared?”
He glanced across the room to where Declan and Bella stood, picking out a bedtime story to read. “Because of him,” he whispered low enough for only me to hear.
Realization dawned.
“Liam, honey,” I said, running my fingers through his hair. “I’m not scared of Brantley. I have no reason to be. Trust me.”
I could tell by the look on his face that he was unsure.
“Sweet boy, listen to me”—I took a breath—“not all men are like him.” Thinking about Colin, much less speaking about him to Liam made my stomach turn. Still, I continued. “Most men are good and kind. Just look at the ones in our family. Hendrix, Anthony, Evan, Pop, Keith, Felix. They are all good, baby, and Brantley is just like them.”
A single tear slid from Liam’s eyes; my heart broke.
“Promise?”
My own eyes filled with tears. “I promise.” Leaning forward, I pressed my lips to his forehead. “I swear I won’t let anyone hurt us, Liam. Never again.”
Declan chose that moment to stand on the bottom bunk and peek his head up to see what Liam was doing. “What’cha doing, Liam?”
Liam rolled to his back, wiping away his tears. “Lay down, Dec. It’s time for Mama to read us a story.”
Declan curled his upper lip at his brother’s annoyed tone and looked at me. “What crawled up his butt?”
“Declan O’Bannon!” I fussed. “We do not speak like that.”
He scrunched up his nose. “Shelby does.”
Now there’s a role model, I thought.
“Lay down, you little delinquent.”
Smiling, Declan plopped down on to the bottom bunk next to Bella, who was wearing one of Liam’s Cub Scout t-shirts. “Alright, scoot over,” I said, barely squeezing onto the mattress beside them. “Liam, you good up there?”
“Yep,” he replied, giving me a thumbs up over the side of the bed.
“Alright,” I said, flipping open the book I’d been handed. “What did you guys pick?”
“Lucky,” Bella said, clapping her hands. “It’s about a horse, and I love horses.”
“Me too,” I replied, finding the first page. “Okay, here we go… Amy and Michele were—”
“Clara,” Bella interrupted.
“Yeah, sweet pea?” I asked, looking over at her.
“Thank you for reading me a book. Daddy reads to me a lot, but my mommy never does.” The sadness that crossed her face hit me in the gut. “She doesn’t like me. She says I’m a b-brat.”
“She’s stupid,” Declan hissed, his face contorted in a way that I’d never seen before. It was clear as day that he was pissed. And I mean pissed. “You’re not a brat. You’re a princess.”
Needing to get control of the situation, I sat up and took Bella’s hand in mine. I forced a shaky smile around the anger that consumed me. “I’m sure she loves you, princess. Sometimes people just have a hard time expressing how they feel.”
It was obvious from her expression that she wasn’t buying it.
What has this witch done to her?
“But you know what? I like you enough for ten people”—I stuck out my tongue—“so there.”
Bella giggled. “I like you too, Clara.” She paused. “I wish I had a mommy like you.”
A lump the size of a boulder formed in the base of my throat and right or wrong, all I could think was, I wish I had a daughter like you.
“Well,” I said, tears filling my eyes. “You may not have come from my belly, babydoll, but you will always have me. Plusss,” I dragged the word out, “you also have Maddie, Shelby, Hope, Charlotte, Ashley, Carissa and Heidi. And dear Lord let’s not forget Grandmama.”
Bella’s face lit up. “I love Carissa! She always sings to me. Will she be at Aunt Hope’s tomorrow? Will I get to see her? Will Heidi be with her? What about Ashley? Can I go to Shelby’s and see her? Will I…”
My head spun. “Slow down, Bella Boo,” I replied, giggling. “I can’t understand you when you talk so fast.” Bella giggled and pulled the blanket up, covering half her face. “Okay, so, yes you’ll see Carissa and Heidi sometime this week. They are both coming to see your cousin Ryker whenever they have some free time. And I’m sure we can find Ashley. After all, she lives right next door to you.”
“Yay!” She threw her hands up in the air as Declan groaned.
&n
bsp; “Not more girls,” he said. “They are everywhere.”
“But first,” I continued, choking back laughter, “we have to go to sleep. And before we can go to sleep, we need to finish our horse book, okay?”
“K.”
Shaking my head, I lied back down, pressing my side to the mattress. “Where were we?” Finding my place in the book again, I began to read. “Amy and Michele were sisters. Amy was older. Michele liked green…”
Within minutes, all three kids were asleep.
I was fuming.
Standing in the middle of my bedroom, wearing nothing but a lacy blue bra and matching panties, I paced across the floor. My nerves were a mess, my anger was through the roof.
My mommy doesn’t like me.
My mommy doesn’t like me.
Bella’s pain filled words repeated in my head.
I was close to throwing something. Seriously, I wasn’t a violent person but if Brantley’s ex-wife were standing in front of me, I would’ve punched in her the face. What kind of vicious bit—
Knock, knock, knock.
Three knocks sounded on my bedroom door, interrupting my stewing.
“What?” I snapped, coming to a standstill.
“Clara,” Brantley’s deep voice called out. “Can I come in?”
Without stopping to think about how I was nearly naked and standing in the middle of a dimly lit room, I replied, “It’s unlocked.”
I blame my lack of giving a crap on my anger.
The door swung open and Brantley stepped inside my bedroom. When his eyes landed on me, his mouth fell open. “Fuck. Me.”
I blinked. Once. Twice. Then, “Well that wasn’t in my plans for the night.”
Brantley’s eyes snapped up, meeting mine. “Are you trying to kill me, Firecracker?” He clutched his chest. I rolled my eyes at his overly dramatic self. “Seriously, are you trying to give me a heart attack?”
I rested my hand on my hips. “Oh, please. Like you haven’t seen more than your fair share of women.”
His eyes widened. “None of them looked like”—he waved his hand in front of him, gesturing at my body—“that.”