by Erin Osborne
We’re all poised to start launching snowballs at one another. Kasey, in all her excitement, wants to gain an edge on her daddy so bad that she lets her snowball fly early and hit’s him right in the stomach. He pretends that he was mortally wounded while we all laugh hysterically at their antics. This is what we needed today. What I needed to distract me from all thoughts of Riley and the mess she just brought here.
“Daddy! I got you!” Kasey yells out.
“Yes, you did sweet pea,” Rage answers. “Now, I’m gonna get you?”
“No! Daddy, no!” Kasey screams out, running to hide behind me.
I can see the sparkle in Rage’s eyes as he plays with his daughter. To him, it doesn’t matter that there’s a crowd around them. The club members and anyone else around are a witness at any given moment to the love and laughter Rage and Kasey share. This is how it should be between a dad and his daughter. There should always be laughter, love, and the feeling of being safe. When it comes to the two that hold my heart, there is no doubt to anyone in the world that Kasey is loved and everything else that she needs.
As I’m standing here daydreaming, the snowball fight is going on around me. I guess I better get my head in the game, before I end up getting hit and Rage gets pissed. Just as I go to take aim at my man, my stomach revolts and I need to run inside. This is not good. But, I should’ve known it was bound to happen. We’ve been having fun and I didn’t really eat lunch today. So, I take off towards the bathroom. Rage is behind me, I can hear him calling for me, but I can’t slow down. If I do, I won’t make it.
Once I’m done in the bathroom, we walk out to see all the girls in the hallway. They’re waiting for me and I know that my time to keep this secret has run out. The only thing I want to do is go take a nap, but if I’ve learned anything since being around the club, it’s that these girls won’t stop until you let them know what they want to know.
“Alright, we know that Whitney knows what’s going on with you,” Bailey starts. “We’re a group of old ladies and we stick together. So, now, someone is going to fill the rest of us in on what’s going on with you Keegan.”
I look back to Rage and see him nod his head at me. He knows that this is what I have to do. In fact, I’m sure it was only a matter of time before he came to me about telling certain people. It’s just a matter of being scared because I was beaten to the point I had a miscarriage before. I don’t want anything to happen to this baby.
“Let’s go in the kitchen and I’ll make us some hot cocoa,” Skylar begins. “Then you can tell us what’s going on. Fill us in on the story that you want to hide. We’ll figure it out honey.”
Rage leaves me to go with the rest of the girls. I’m sure that he’s going to make his way back out to Kasey and the snowball fight. He’ll make sure that she’s distracted while we’re talking. This is going to hurt her since we told her that she could be the one to break the news about the baby. I’ll let them know so that they can act surprised when we make the announcement.
As Skylar’s working on making hot cocoa for everyone, the rest of us sit down and get comfortable. I want to wait until she’s over here, but from the looks I’m getting, I don’t think that’s going to be possible.
“We know why you left,” Maddie begins. “Now, we want to know what’s happened since you’ve been gone. There hasn’t been time to catch up properly.”
“Well, I found out when I was in Benton Falls that I am pregnant,” I tell them.
The girls sit there in stunned silence for a few minutes. I’m not sure what they’re waiting for, but the looks on their faces are pretty comical. They range from stun, surprise, shock, and understanding. Finally, Skylar lets out a squeal of happiness and runs over to hug me. The rest of them quickly follow suit and I’m engulfed in them all trying to hug me at the same time. At least until we hear someone clearing their throat from the doorway.
“Everythin’ okay in here?” Irish asks, walking up to Whitney.
“More than okay,” Bailey answers, she looks at me silently asking if we can let him know.
I shake my head so that he is kept in the dark. Kasey needs to be the one to break the news to everyone else. We promised her that and I’m going to make sure we keep that promise. Bailey respects my wishes and quickly ushers Irish out of the kitchen. I’m guessing that everyone is going to be heading back inside, so maybe I should talk to Rage about making the announcement.
Making my excuses, I make my way out to find my man and Kasey. As long as we’re all going to be here, we might as well tell everyone now what’s going on. I’m sure that Kasey has been waiting and waiting to be able to let everyone know she’s going to be a big sister. I find them sitting at a table with Grim and Glock. Once Rage sees me, he looks to make sure I’m okay. I nod my head to let him know I’m good.
“I think it’s time,” I tell him, sitting down between him and Glock.
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah. Let her have her moment now. People are starting to wonder and we’re not going to be able to hide it much longer.”
“Sweet pea, are you ready to share our news?” Rage asks Kasey.
“Yes!” she yells out excitedly.
Rage walks Kasey over to the bar and stands her on top of it. He gets everyone’s attention and waits until the common room goes deadly silent. Whispering to his daughter, I see the excitement shining from her eyes.
“We gots some news!” Kasey begins, talking loudly and excitedly. “I’m gonna be a big sister! My Keegan’s gonna have a baby!”
There’s no movement or noise in the clubhouse for a minute. Finally, everyone starts talking and congratulating us all at once. It’s chaos at it’s best and I’m so glad that I’m back with the people that are truly my family. These people have made me the happiest I’ve ever been, and I will never be able to thank them for accepting me into their fold with no questions asked. Other than what I was running and hiding from.
Rage brings Kasey down from the bar top and she hugs us both. It’s been her and her dad for so long that she’s can’t wait to meet the new baby. We’ve had talks about it. There’s a whole list of things that she already wants to do with the baby. And, she keeps telling me that she’s even going to help change the dirty, stinky diapers.
“You happy soon to be mama?” Rage asks, pulling me into his side.
“I am. What more could we ask for? We’ve got friends by our side, family, playing out in the snow, and the holidays are fast approaching,” I tell him, snuggling in even closer.
“I could think of a few things.”
“Like what?” I ask, wanting to know what he’s talking about.
“Well, for starters, your dad and that asswipe bein’ out of the equation. Then, havin’ a home of our own.”
“You want to have a house with me?” I ask astonished. I mean I didn’t think we’d stay at the clubhouse permanently. But, I didn’t think he’d want to get a house with me already.
“Of course. I’ve already started it. See, I listen when you talk firefly. I know what you want and what you don’t want.”
“Are you serious? When can I see it?” I ask, the excitement building the more I think about sharing a home with this family.
“I’ll see what kind of progress gets made this week and then I’ll show it to you. Right now, it’s not much to look at.”
Without hesitation, I reach up and pull Rage down to meet my lips. Before it can get too heated, I hear a muffled ‘ew’ coming from Kasey. This leads to everyone surrounding us laughing like crazy. Yeah, we might have forgotten we had an audience.
“We’ll continue this later on. After Kasey has gone to bed,” Rage tells me, slapping my ass before walking over to join some of the guys.
Chapter Four
Keegan
I CAN’T BELIEVE HOW FAST TIME is flying by. We’ve been playing in the snow, spending time with everyone in the clubhouse, and now we’re planning for Thanksgiving in a few weeks. I’m excited because it will be
my first celebration with family. In the month that’s gone by, every single one of these individuals have become my family.
At the same time, I’m trying to slowly ease back into spending time with Riley. Things aren’t the same as it used to be, and honestly, I don’t know that they ever will be again. She’s been trying to tell me what exactly happened and what made her change her mind. While I appreciate that she’s trying to be honest now, I think she should’ve been honest from the very beginning. We could have come up with a game plan back then.
Today, I have to take time away from helping the rest of the girls plan for Thanksgiving. Rage and I are going to see Doctor Sanchez. He’s really concerned about how tired I am and the way that I’m still getting sick. Honestly, I am too. Bailey and the rest of the girls have talked to me about this and they’ve all told me that they think I’m carrying multiples. They just aren’t sure if it’s twins or more. That thought scares the ever-loving shit out of me honestly.
“Are you almost ready firefly?” Rage asks, coming in our room.
“Yeah. I just need to brush my hair and we’ll be ready to head out.”
“I’ll be in the truck waitin’. I’m just gonna drop Kasey off in the game room with the girls.”
Rage gives me a kiss and then walks out of the room. It’s probably a good thing because I’m distracted to the point that I’m forgetting things this morning. I went to take a shower, and I forgot all my clothes in the room. Thankfully, I locked the door before I got in, so I didn’t have to worry about anyone walking in. But, first I forgot that I was making Kasey eggs and toast this morning and completely burned everything. It was insane. We had to open all the windows and doors to get the horrid smell out of the clubhouse.
It doesn’t take me long to get done brushing my hair. So, I grab my purse and head out to the truck. Rage bought one a week ago. He decided that we needed something better for the winter months. Especially with the baby on the way. The car that I’ve been driving is good enough with the three of us, but not now that there’s at least one more baby on the way. I haven’t even told him about the possibility of there being more than one baby in there.
On our way to the doctor’s office, he holds my hand. I’m not sure if he’s trying to calm me down or calm himself down. I know he’s been worried about how sick and tired I’ve been. It’s something that we’re going to talk to the doctor about today. Rage and I talked about it last night and I agreed that we need to find out what’s going on.
Today is the first time that I’m walking into a doctor’s office with Rage. He doesn’t let me go to the counter alone or anything. The entire time, he’s right by my side. Especially when I finally got called back to go in the exam room. I’m not going to do a single thing alone during this pregnancy. It’s refreshing to know that I’m not going to be alone.
“How has everything been going?” the nurse asks me.
“I’ve still been really sick and I’m sleeping a lot. I know I’ve heard that you get tired in the beginning of your pregnancy, but the way I sleep is insane. It’s all I want to do.”
“Well, we can do some blood work and an ultrasound. Then we can try to figure out what’s going on and what we need to do next,” Doctor Sanchez tells me.
“Sounds good,” Rage answers.
As soon as I got on the exam table, he pulled the chair up by my head and hasn’t moved from that spot since. He’s not going to be going too far from me if he doesn’t have to. Honestly, I didn’t think I was going to like the attention, I figured I’d feel suffocated. The opposite is actually true. I feel so loved and wanted, like he’s true when he tells me that he’s going to be by my side and protect me, and our family, no matter what.
Doctor Sanchez does what she has to do as far as my exam goes. Once she’s done, she makes the arrangements for me to have an ultrasound done. She wants it done today with the way that I’m feeling. Having a doctor that is going to go above and beyond to make sure that I’m okay is amazing. I’ve heard horror stories where the patient could barely get a word in about something that was going on. I don’t know what I’d do if I ended up with someone like that.
“Okay, stay right here,” she tells us coming back in the room. “The technician will be here shortly. On your way out, make sure that you make an appointment for another month from now.”
We thank the doctor before she leaves the room. Once again, she makes sure that I have the medicine I need to stop feeling so nauseous. It helps a little bit, but I can’t constantly take it, so there’s going to be times that I’m going to have to deal with it.
“Are you excited to see the baby?” I ask Rage.
“Yeah. I know it’s not goin’ to look like much since you aren’t that far along, but it’s better than nothin’,” he answers.
I can see the excitement in his eyes. It makes me wonder if he got to go through anything when his ex was pregnant with Kasey. If he didn’t, my heart breaks for him. Rage is such an amazing man and a wonderful father. Our little boy or girl is going to be so loved and cherished. This pregnancy also makes me realize that I wasn’t anywhere near ready to have a baby when I was pregnant before. I’m glad that I get to experience this with the man at my side and not someone else.
“Can I ask you something without upsetting you?” I ask him hesitantly.
“Of course, you can. Don’t ever be afraid to ask me anythin’ firefly.”
“Did you get to go through this with Kasey’s mom? Were you still together when she was pregnant?”
“No. She wouldn’t let me around her. I got told she was pregnant through a text message. Once in a while I’d get an update, but that’s it. Hell, I was barely there when Kasey was born. If it wasn’t for my mom, I wouldn’t have known at all.”
“I’m so sorry,” I tell him, my heart breaking.
“Nothin’ to be sorry about. It’s in the past and I have Kasey all to myself now. Plus, I get to experience it with you now.”
“I would never hold this from you. No matter what happens between us, I’d never have kept your baby from you.”
“I know firefly.”
Before anything else can be said, there’s a knock on the door and it’s opened. There’s a technician wheeling a big machine in behind her. I’m not sure exactly what I’m supposed to be seeing here, but I’m sure she knows exactly what she’s doing. Rage has a confused expression on his face too. We look at one another and I know that we’re both clueless in this moment.
“How are you today?” the tech asks.
“We’re doing good,” I answer, noticing that she’s not looking in my man’s direction at all.
“Okay. This is going to be an internal ultrasound. Have you heard of that before?”
“No.”
The technician explains what’s going to happen. I watch as Rage’s face pales. If I wasn’t so worried about what’s going on, I’d laugh at him. But, this is to make sure that our baby is fine, so I just grab his hand and hold on tight. This makes Rage look at me and I know he can see the concern I have for him. So, he leans over and kisses me gently while she gets everything ready.
Once she’s ready to go, she tells me to push my pants down. Once I have them removed, she does what she has to do so we can see our baby on the screen. The only reason I know this is because she told us that’s what was going to happen. Within a minute there’s a picture up on the screen and I’m staring at it in fascination. Even though I have no clue what I’m looking at, I know that our child is in there. A child that was created out of love.
She points out different things and then my man asks the question that was in my head. “Um, why does it look like there are two tiny blobs in there?”
“That would be because there are two in there. It looks like you’ll be having twins,” the technician tells us.
I glance over at Rage and he’s staring at me with love shining from him. I’m not sure what’s going through his head right now though. Personally, I’m scared shitless knowing th
at we’re going to be bringing two little ones into this world. Our family is getting bigger than we anticipated, but I know that with him by my side, we’ll be more than fine. Rage isn’t going to be an absent dad that expects me to do it all on my own. He’ll be there for the midnight feedings, the dirty diapers, the crying, the first moments such as their first smile, walking, crawling, and talking. We’re going to go through the hard times and the good times as a unit.
As we’re walking back in the clubhouse, Rage is staring at the pictures from the ultrasound. He’s been so quiet on the way here and I don’t know how to take it. I’m sure he’s surprised just like I am, but him not saying a single word is unnerving. If I weren’t just as shocked, I would probably be upset right now.
“Are you okay?” I finally ask him.
“Yeah. I’m shocked, surprised, happy as fuck, and scared,” he tells me, wrapping his arms around me and pulling me in for a delicious kiss.
“Should we tell Kasey?”
“Yeah. Let’s find her and let her know. Then she’ll let everyone else know.”
That’s another thing that I’m so happy about. We are including her in every part of this. We’re not excluding her or making her feel like we’re trying to replace her or anything. Kasey will be a part of this every step of the way. It’s the only way that she’s not going to feel anything bad about it. And, if we’re going to be a family, I want her included in everything. I already love her so much and feel like she’s my daughter.
“Keegan! Daddy!” we hear shouted from the hallway. “You’re back!”
Kasey comes running up to us and if we didn’t know, we’d have missed catching her as she threw herself into our arms. This is what she always does though, so we were both ready. After hugging her and placing kisses all over her little angelic face, we tell her that we have some news for her. Rage walks us over to a table in the corner, so we can share this privately.