by Anne Mather
She hardly heard the rest of the conversation that ensued between Jared and the doctor. She was too involved with her own state of mind, and when Dr Singh bade them both goodbye and walked away towards Glyn’s room, she couldn’t wait to express her misgivings.
‘You can’t go away and leave me to it,’ she exclaimed, refusing to allow him to speak. ‘I can’t go on with this without your help. I mean—I don’t know Glyn. I know nothing about him. How do you think I’m going to manage when he starts talking about things he and Val have done together—people they both know? It’s crazy! It was crazy to begin with, and it’s even crazier now.’
‘Look, cool it, will you?’ Jared expelled his breath wearily. ‘Okay, I know it looks like I’m putting the whole weight of this on your shoulders, but if Glyn’s going to be fit to come home in a week’s time, I’ve got to go back and prepare the way.’
‘Prepare the way?’
‘Yes, prepare the way.’ Jared moved his shoulders in an indifferent gesture. ‘I’ve got to see Lisa, I’ve got to tell her how it is. Right now, she doesn’t know—everything.’
‘You haven’t told her Glyn’s blind?’ Rhia stared at him.
‘You got it.’
Rhia shook her head. ‘Couldn’t you tell her on the phone?’
Jared made a negative gesture. ‘No.’
Rhia sighed. ‘Why not?’
‘Because I can’t.’ He was abrupt. ‘Look, we can’t talk here. Let me tell Glyn I’m leaving, then I’ll drive you home.’
‘Don’t bother.’ Rhia was in no mood to be tactful. ‘I’ll get a cab. I’d rather.’
‘You’ll never get one at this time of night,’ retorted Jared tersely. ‘Don’t be a fool, Rhia. Wait here.’
Rhia thrust her hands into the pockets of her jacket, as she acknowledged he was probably right, about a taxi, at least. She wished she had the guts to walk home. Right now, she badly wanted to be alone to assimilate all she had learned, and to try and face the week ahead with something less that sheer blind panic. Blind! Her lips twisted bitterly. She had certainly been blind to walk into this so impulsively.
Jared was coming towards her again, and she watched his approach with covert eyes. In spite of the fact that he had had little or no sleep the night before, he did not look as exhausted as she felt. On the contrary, the slight pouches beneath his eyes gave him a slightly debauched appearance that was not unattractive, and there was no trace of weariness in his deceptively indolent stride.
‘Let’s go,’ he said, and she had no choice but to obey. Somehow, she had the feeling he was well used to giving orders and being obeyed, and she couldn’t understand why Glyn’s mother should receive such individual treatment.
Happily, the streets were much clearer than earlier in the day, and they made good time. It was only a quarter to one when Jared brought the Mercedes to a halt before the block of apartments, and Rhia decided that whatever happened, she would not be getting up early on Sunday morning.
However, when she would have made to get out, he laid a restraining hand upon her arm. It was very comfortable in the car, with the heating purring and the voice of Randy Crawford issuing with soft insistence from the radio, and Rhia stiffened instinctively at the implied intimacy.
‘I just want to—thank you,’ he said, his features shadowy in the light from the street lamps outside. ‘I do—appreciate what you’re doing for us. And I promise you won’t lose by it.’
Rhia, who had been briefly distracted by the attractive tones of his voice, knew a sudden sense of distaste. ‘I don’t want anything from you, Mr Frazer,’ she retorted, removing her arm from his grasp and pushing open the door of the car. ‘What I’m doing, I’m doing for Glyn, not you. Goodnight.’
‘Rhia—’
She heard his impatient exclamation as she hurried into the apartment building, but she didn’t stop to find out whether he was following her. The lift stood gaping on the ground floor, and she stepped into it without a backward glance.
CHAPTER FIVE
DURING the week that followed, Rhia did her best to forget what Jared Frazer had said. She did her best to forget him, but it wasn’t easy when Glyn frequently mentioned his uncle. Perhaps he found reassurance in speaking about his family, Rhia couldn’t be sure, but she did not interrupt him. It was a relief to her not to have to play any active part in their conversation, knowing as she did how easy it would be to make a clumsy mistake.
Jared had left for Calgary on Monday lunchtime, after spending most of the morning with his nephew. Rhia had had little to do with him on Sunday, arriving at the hospital unaided in the morning, and arranging with Simon to pick her up in the evening, so that they could at least attend the latter half of the Bartok concert. It was quite a relief to sit in the auditorium of the Festival Hall and allow the music to sweep over her, even if the memory of Jared’s taut face when she told him her plans remained an indelible memory. After all, she had her own life to lead, she consoled herself, ignoring the fact that part of her guilt stemmed from the way she had behaved the night before.
Contrary to her expectations, she had no telephone call from her father, but she did receive a second telegram, from him. In it, he merely confirmed that Valentina was with him, and promised he would write later with more details. Rhia guessed this was her sister’s doing. She would not want Rhia regaling their father with her reasons for leaving England so precipitately, and for the present Rhia was too tied up to care.
Her working day was the most difficult thing to explain to Glyn. He was used to Valentina working either days or nights, or a split shift which entailed her being there mornings and evenings. He was not accustomed to office hours, and Rhia had had to lie and say that she had been given a concessionary day-shift.
‘Isn’t it better that I come and see you in the evenings?’ she asked, when he first protested, and without much alternative he had had to agree.
Her worst moments came when they were alone together and he wanted to get more intimate. She was anxiously aware that her hair, confined though it was in a knot on top of her head, would not remain in place if he tried to run his fingers through it. In consequence, she had to risk his believing she was too embarrassed to indulge in any heavy petting in the hospital, and appeased her conscience with the thought that he might think she was cooling off, which could only be for the best.
He was certainly getting stronger, and by the middle of the week he was up and sitting in a chair beside his bed. He was still in pyjamas and dressing gown, of course, but it did mean he was more mobile and consequently more hazardous to Rhia’s peace of mind.
However, his continuing blindness was beginning to take its toll. Whereas, at the beginning of the week, she had been able to reassure him, as each day passed without any improvement in his sight, his depression grew, and she began to be less troubled about his discovering her identity than worrying about his deteriorating state of mind. He grew morose, and listless, and spent most of the time when she came to visit him, questioning her about his condition. He had accepted Jared’s departure for Calgary without anxiety, content in the knowledge that when Jared returned, it would be to take him back for a prolonged holiday. He had even spoken of Rhia—or Val, as he believed her to be—accompanying them for a holiday herself, assuring her she would enjoy staying on the ranch. Rhia had received the news that Jared Frazer owned a ranch with some surprise. In her experience, farmers, as they were known in England, often found it hard to make ends meet. They did not own private planes, or fly back and forth across the Atlantic, as easily as they drove to market. But then she knew nothing about farming methods in Canada, and she supposed Jared could be a member of some farming combine.
Simon took the news of Glyn’s depression without sympathy. ‘Anyone who’d let that sister of yours drive his car deserves everything he gets,’ he exclaimed one evening, when he had picked Rhia up from the hospital after visiting Glyn, and driven her to his mother’s house in Kensal Green. ‘The man must be a luna
tic! She could have killed somebody!’
‘That’s true, Rhia,’ said Mrs Travis, setting a tray containing a plate of biscuits and three cups of tea on the table beside her armchair. Then, subsiding into the chair, and spreading her slippered feet out before her, she went on: ‘You seem to forget, that young man brought this whole affair on himself. While I’m not excusing your sister—running off like that, quite unforgivable—I can’t help thinking you’re treating the matter far too lightly.’
‘Lightly!’ Rhia gazed at her aghast.
‘Well—lightly in the respect that you’re saving all your sympathies for Glyn Frazer, when you might conceivably consider what the consequences might have been.’
Rhia sighed. ‘There’s not much point in that, is there, Mrs Travis? I mean, all right, I admit Glyn shouldn’t have let Val drive his car. But I know my sister. She can be very persuasive. And as Glyn obviously thought—thinks—a lot of her, he probably wanted to please her. It was wrong, we all know that, but he’s the only one being made to suffer. Don’t you think that’s sufficient punishment for anyone?’
Mrs Travis sniffed, and Simon leant forward to help himself to a biscuit. ‘Well, I tend to agree with Mother,’ he remarked, not entirely to Rhia’s surprise. ‘And I think Frazer has taken advantage of your generosity.’
‘Glyn! He doesn’t—’
‘No, not Glyn,’ declared Simon tersely. ‘I mean his uncle, naturally. Clearing off like that and leaving you to bear all the responsibility—it’s not right.’
‘And it’s not very nice for Simon either,’ put in his mother, nodding her head. ‘How do you think he feels when friends come up to him and ask him why you were at the hospital? People talk!’
‘Friends?’ Rhia looked to Simon for confirmation. ‘Who?’
‘It was Toby Richards, actually,’ muttered Simon, not entirely happy with his mother for bringing it up.
‘Toby Richards!’ Rhia gasped. ‘Well, honestly, Simon, you can hardly call Toby Richards a friend!’
‘No. But he is a colleague,’ said Simon defensively, and Rhia shook her head.
‘You see him about twice a year.’
‘Yes, but he knows you. By sight, anyway.’
‘And he saw me at the hospital?’
‘Last weekend.’ He paused. ‘With—er—with Frazer, actually.’
‘With Glyn!’
‘Are you being deliberately obtuse, Rhia? No, of course not with Glyn. With his uncle, of course. Toby was going into the hospital, to visit his mother, just as you and Frazer were coming out.’
‘Oh, I see.’ Rhia was beginning to understand. It wasn’t so much her visiting Glyn that Simon objected to, as being seen with another man. She knew of Toby Richards’ reputation, and she could quite imagine the interpretation he had given Simon.
‘So, how is he this evening?’ Mrs Travis interposed quickly, noticing the indignant sparkle that had come into Rhia’s eyes, and unwilling to be accused later of starting an argument. She could never be sure which side Simon was going to take. Even when her claims were justified, he often took Rhia’s part, and she had no wish to fall out with him.
Rhia, tempted to ignore the question and pursue the matter of Toby Richards further, gave in. She had no real desire to fall out with Simon either, and schooling her features, she forced a faint smile.
‘Physically, apart from his eyes, that is, he seems to be getting stronger. But this obstruction of his sight is the real problem.’
‘Can’t he see anything?’ asked Mrs Travis curiously.
‘I’m afraid not.’ Even thinking about it made Rhia feel so helpless. ‘Poor Glyn, I. feel so sorry for him.’
‘And Frazer’s playing on that,’ exclaimed Simon, losing patience. Getting to his feet, he surveyed her frustratedly. ‘When is he coming back? When can we expect to be free of this—this duty? Rhia, I’ve been very tolerant, but I’m beginning to feel stifled by it all.’
‘I’m sorry you feel like that, Simon.’ Rhia put down her teacup and folded her hands. ‘What would you have me do? Stop visiting him?’
Simon hunched his shoulders. ‘You make it sound like a crime!’
‘And wouldn’t it be? Cruel, anyway.’
Simon drew a deep breath. ‘Okay. But when his uncle gets back—’
‘When his uncle gets back, he’s going to take him home,’ declared Rhia firmly, and stifled the realisation that for all her misgivings, she was going to miss Glyn.
On Thursday evenings she didn’t see Simon, and she arrived home from the hospital at about half past nine to hear the telephone ringing in the apartment. Expecting it to be him, Rhia didn’t hurry, but when she eventually lifted the receiver she had the strange sensation that she was listening to space. Immediately, her mind jumped to her father, and the possibility that he had decided to ring after all, but then another voice spoke, deep and vibrant, and she realised it was Jared Frazer.
‘I didn’t get you out of bed, did I?’ he enquired, after she had answered his greeting, and Rhia made a sound of indignation.
‘I’ve been at the hospital, visiting your nephew,’ she retorted, taking her bag from her shoulder, with fingers that were not quite steady, and dropping it on to the couch. ‘Where—where are you calling from?’
‘Moose Falls,’ he replied flatly, his voice echoing hollowly on the line. ‘I just wanted to ask you how you think Glyn is progressing.’
‘If you rang the hospital—’ began Rhia quickly, unsure why he should be calling her, but Jared cut her off.
‘I have rung the hospital,’ he declared. ‘And spoken with Glyn, as it happens. I guess it must have been just after you’d left. That’s why I’m ringing you.’
Realising her palm was sticking to the receiver, Rhia herself sank down on to the couch, and shifted the phone into her other hand. ‘But why?’
‘You know why, Rhia. Glyn’s not responding to treatment, is he? And according to Singh, he’s in a pretty low state of mind.’
Rhia sighed. ‘I’m afraid that’s true.’
‘He hasn’t guessed—he doesn’t suspect—’
‘Me?’ Rhia shook her head. ‘No. No, I don’t think he suspects anything like that. But he is upset because his sight isn’t returning.’
‘So I believe.’ Jared sounded grim. ‘God knows how he’s going to adapt to an indefinite period of blindness!’
Rhia made a helpless gesture. ‘It may not come to that, Jared. I mean—give it a little longer before you start jumping to conclusions. Nerves are funny things. Maybe he just needs to relax, away from the hospital.’
‘You’re very reassuring,’ remarked Jared dryly, his wry humour stirring her unwilling pulses. ‘What a pity you’re not a nurse, instead of your sister. I think you’ve missed your vocation.’
Rhia had to laugh, and Jared gave a rueful sigh. ‘You should be here, you know that?’ he added, bringing an uneasy flutter to Rhia’s stomach. ‘I could do with your support.’
‘W-why?’ Rhia paused. ‘Did you tell your sister-in-law?’
‘About Glyn’s blindness? Yes, I told her. She took it pretty badly, as I knew she would. Even my father feels the strain.’
‘I’m sorry.’ The words were trite, but Rhia couldn’t think of any others. ‘I—when—when will you be back?’
‘Why? Have you missed me?’ he asked, half teasingly, and Rhia’s own nerves quivered.
‘Naturally—naturally Glyn has missed you,’ she said, avoiding a direct reply. ‘I—I think he’ll feel better when he leaves the hospital.’
‘Do you?’ Jared did not sound convinced. ‘And I guess Travis will feel better too, won’t he?’
‘My visiting Glyn is not hurting Simon,’ Rhia replied firmly, not quite knowing why he was bringing this up.
‘Good.’ Jared essayed his approval. ‘Well, I’m flying back Friday night. I’ll give you a call Saturday morning, if that’s okay.’
‘Of—of course.’ Rhia felt a ripple of anticipation slide along her spi
ne.
‘Okay.’ Jared prepared to ring off, and then, just as Rhia was about to offer her goodbyes, he said: ‘About the other night—I want to apologise—’ And when she tried to protest, he added: ‘Listen. I didn’t mean to offend you, I just wanted to show my gratitude.’
‘It’s all right. Really.’ Rhia was embarrassed, but Jared did not spare her blushes.
‘I don’t know what either. Glyn—or I—would have done without you,’ he said, his voice low and resonant. ‘See you Saturday. Goodnight.’
Rhia replaced the receiver carefully, sitting for several minutes just staring at the phone before getting up and taking off her coat. She realised she was feeling decidedly shaky, and she chided herself for being affected by the unconscious charm of the man. He was being polite that was all. His reasons for calling her had been painfully obvious. He was worried about his nephew, and after speaking with Glyn, he had needed reassurance that his anxieties were not misplaced. Nevertheless, she could not deny that he was an attractive man, and she thought it was just as well it was Glyn, and not Jared, who was needing her help. The idea of sitting with him for hours on end was a disturbing one, and to imagine kissing him, as she was getting used to kissing his nephew, evoked a sudden pain in the pit of her stomach. Jared had such an attractive mouth, narrow-lipped and faintly cynical, and the idea of feeling those firm lips parting hers brought a wave of heat surging through her body.
Her foolish emotions irritated her, however, and she hung up her coat with impatient hands. It wasn’t as if she was a schoolgirl, attracted by the first man who showed an interest in her, she thought irritably. Heavens, she was twenty-one years old; she had had boy-friends since she was sixteen, and she and Simon had been going out together now for almost three years! She was letting the emotions she felt for Glyn get mixed up with her feelings towards his uncle, and the sooner both of them got out of her life, the better.