She'd never made any attempt to socialize with her fellow hunters. It wasn't encouraged, and, in any case, she'd never really learned how to interact socially with others, never having had much opportunity for it growing up. On the other hand, she hadn't exactly tried to keep her background secret either. She kept images of her family in her locker and it wasn't inconceivable that those had been seen by at least some of the other hunters.
And that was just the sort of juicy tidbit people liked to share when they were bored and couldn't think of anything else to talk about.
Apparently, her whereabouts since take offwasn't a secret and Psycho's nasty remark was only a prelude to what she could expect to have to endure.
She selected one of the last bunks for her own, in the corner near the far bulkhead, not so much because she was trying to hide—although she wished she could—but because, strategically, it would be easier to defend if she came under attack.
She should've been used to being the pariah. She'd been ‘the freak’ growing up and the reputation of the hunters was such that civilians generally gave them a wide berth and, of course, the hunters themselves were encouraged to be loners.
Now, however, she didn't even have the comfort of knowing she was among her fellow soldiers.
She was human, the only human in the barracks, the only human on a ship loaded with cyborgs and bound for a planet inhabited and ruled by them.
She was pretty sure she knew what it felt like to be the only guppy in a tank full of sharks.
Chapter Ten
Amaryllis’ internal clock, attuned to her uneasiness about her surroundings, woke her periodically. She'd considered staying awake, but she had to sleep sometime or she wouldn't be able to defend herself even if she was attacked and since the only alternative was sleeping while everyone else was awake and that seemed far more dangerous she composed herself and slept with one eye open and one ear cocked for trouble.
Under the circumstances, she was surprised she got any rest at all, but the past weeks had worn at her, frayed her nerves and exhausted her both physically and emotionally.
The events of the night before had wrecked what little composure she had left.
She didn't want to think about Dante.
It was like having a sore tooth. She couldn't resist touching it, but the moment she did excruciating pain replaced the dull throbbing ache that was her constant companion.
She didn't want to think about Reese either, but it was as difficult to block him from her thoughts as Dante. Consciously dismissing them from her mind and refusing to think about them by focusing on something else did very little good. Erotic dreams of both Reese and Dante tormented her nights.
Nearly a week passed before she saw Reese again and by that time she'd arrived at some fairly unpalatable conclusions.
Despite the company's claims about the cyborgs, these were beings. Strictly speaking, they might not be human beings, but she thought that was debatable—they certainly weren't the spawn of alien DNA. As far as she could see the only thing that made her any different from them at all was the fact that she'd been conceived ‘naturally'. Physically, they had no greater ratio of mechanics to biological material than she did. Mentally—except for being well above average intellectually—their thought processes didn't seem to differ a great deal, and emotionally—they were capable of pretty much the entire range of nasty human traits.
Psycho might've been the only one to vocalize her feelings about Amaryllis fraternizing with the ‘enemy', but since pretty much everyone else treated her like the invisible woman she had a fairly clear idea of what their feelings were on the matter. And being tried and convicted by one's peers on nothing more substantial than a rumor was certainly a very human situation.
When she added to that the fact that both Reese and Dante had betrayed her, she had to admit the differences between human and cyborg were blurred to near indistinguishable.
For a solid week after she'd been placed with the other female hunters, they were confined almost exclusively to the barracks, even taking their meals there and it dawned on her after a while that nothing had changed a great deal from her previous situation, except that now she was surrounded by people who ignored her. The only break in the monotony was when they were lined up and taken to the facilities for showering.
Excitement rolled through the barracks when they discovered the following week that they would be allowed to leave the barracks during wake period to mingle in the rec room. Any break in the monotony was welcome, but Amaryllis didn't see what there was to get so excited about. When they reached the rec room, though, she saw that the male hunters had been allowed access to the rec room, as well.
After weeks of confinement, she supposed it was only natural that everyone would feel as if they'd been released from prison. It wasn't much of a release in her book. Guards still watched them from windows in the deck above them. Guards escorted them to and from the barracks. Once they reached the rec room, they couldn't leave until they were escorted out again, under guard.
Dalia, the huntress who'd supposedly gone ‘rogue', remained with the group of hunters, as much a prisoner as the rest of them. Despite the fact that their bunks were on opposite ends of the barracks, Amaryllis had caught several glimpses of her in the past week, along with the rumors that Dalia was a plant, there to spy on them and report everything they said and did to the cyborgs.
Amaryllis didn't know whether to believe it or not. There didn't seem to be much point to it when the cyborgs could as easily survey them and collect intelligence through electronic means, but she wasn't the least surprised that the rumors persisted. It was just the sort of thing that ‘people’ did when they were bored and/or scared—search for a target to take out their frustrations on. Unlike her, however, Dalia was neither ‘invisible’ nor ostracized.
Mentally, Amaryllis conceded that that was most likely because Dalia was the best of the best and there probably wasn't one among them, the males included, who didn't suffer just a tiny bit of hero worship where she was concerned.
Regardless, as tired as she was of having nothing but her own thoughts for company, of being alone even in a crowded room, she knew better than to attempt to change the situation. Any overtures on her part would almost certainly be resoundingly snubbed, and she thought she might as well spare her pride at least.
To Amaryllis’ surprise, she discovered on the third day that either the hunters hadn't heard the rumors the huntresses were speculating on, or they simply didn't care, or the rumors intrigued them rather than repelled them. One of the hunters, Cain, who'd actually been her recruiting officer, approached her. She eyed him warily, wondering if he'd merely come to see if he could discover any juicy tidbits to pass along to the others pertaining to the rumor that she'd taken a cyborg lover.
They were bound to be getting bored with what they had and had managed to invent by this time.
"I didn't realize until the other day that you were among the captured."
Amaryllis felt a blush rising in her cheeks in spite of everything she could do, but, even if he was alluding to the rumors about her, she wasn't going to acknowledge it. “My partner and I were close enough we were called in to take part in the mission."
He looked uncomfortable for several moments and she thought he was going to leave again. “Do you think there's any truth to what they told us?” He asked after a moment, and then shrugged. “I suppose anything's possible, but it's hard to accept that nothing I think I remember was real."
Amaryllis relaxed fractionally, realizing he wasn't referring to her time with Dante. She wasn't a great deal more comfortable with the conversation he'd chosen, however. “I don't know, but it's hard to argue with their logic,” she responded. “No matter how well trained, it seems unlikely a human would be a match for a cyborg in strength, speed, or agility.” The comment prompted a line of thought that hadn't occurred to her before and she frowned. “But if it's true, it makes me wonder what The Company had in mind f
Cain studied her assessingly for several moments. “Actually, it's fairly clear what they had in mind."
Amaryllis looked at him in surprise. “You must know something I don't."
"I must ... but then I'd assumed we all had the second, ‘mystery’ locator."
Amaryllis nodded, but she was more puzzled, not less so. “The tech found two on me, too. Which was almost as curious as the fact that I don't even remember them planting that second one."
"That second one—the one none of us knew about—was a termination chip."
Amaryllis felt her jaw go slack with stunned surprise. “You don't mean ... you can't mean...."
He smiled faintly, but the amusement didn't reach his eyes. “I do mean exactly that. When we'd finished, they would've had no further use for us, and I have to assume they figured it would be too risky to leave any of us ‘in service’ ... unless they had something against me in particular."
"You're positive?"
"Did I take their word for it, you mean?” he asked, jerking his head fractionally in the direction of the cyborgs that were watching from above. “I don't trust anyone that much. No. I checked it myself."
A wave of nausea washed through her. Anger followed it. “This is ... outrageous! Who the hell died and made them God!"
He shrugged. “The government. They've been dipping deeper and deeper into big business’ pockets. It was only a matter of time before power shifted. The government wields very little control over anything any longer.
"The situation with the cyborgs threatened to become far too big for a cover up, however. If word got out, terror would follow and mass hysteria is beyond anyone's control. I feel sure the government and The Company were in agreement that it would be far better to sweep it under the rug as quickly as possible than to risk having a public outcry widespread enough to threaten toppling them from power. The Company depends upon having their puppets in place. Then, too, hysteria is contagious. There's no saying but what knowledge of what they had done wouldn't cause rioting, which in turn could cause a great deal of damage to the property and profits of The Company."
Amaryllis realized he was probably right, but it didn't make her any less angry. “In other words, we really don't have anywhere else to go, whether we want to stay or not?"
Cain released a sigh that was tinged with exasperation. “I don't precisely relish the thought of becoming a colonist, but fortunately, I learn fast,” he added with a trace of amusement, referring to the ease with which he could assimilate additional programming. “I feel confident that I could find a niche for myself that would satisfy me. And I have to admit there are certain incentives that appeal."
Recalling her life as the child of a colonist, Amaryllis wasn't sure she could agree with him, but then her own experiences, she had to admit, had been tainted by her situation. She supposed she'd never given much thought to what she would be when she retired from active service in the militia. Maybe she hadn't expected to live to retire?
A death wish?
She didn't think so. She thought it was more a matter of never having had any expectations of having a life like her parents had had. Who would want a freak as a companion, after all? And since that was the only life she was intimately acquainted with she either hadn't wanted to imagine spending the end of her days alone or she just hadn't been able to envision it, having come from a large, loving family.
"Such as?” she asked finally.
"The family units they will need to build a society. I hadn't given much thought to what I would do if I lived to retire from active duty, but now that I have been retired from company service, the idea of a companion and children holds a good deal of appeal."
Amaryllis blinked at him in surprise. “But ... cyborgs can't...."
He shrugged. “Dalia is pregnant ... proof that the cyborgs are evolving into a unique species."
"Or that Dalia is actually human,” Amaryllis pointed out dryly.
"And yet it was you who pointed out that no human would have the speed, strength, or agility to best a cyborg. If that is true then Dalia, who has had more kills than any other, would certainly fit that criteria. Besides, Reuel claims the child as his own."
Amaryllis’ eyes widened at his mention of the most feared, and sought after, cyborg of all. “Reuel?” she whispered in a voice threaded with awe.
He shrugged. “I don't know what the likelihood is that we will find we have all evolved the ability to procreate, but it certainly isn't impossible if it has already happened once."
"Making plans already?"
Amaryllis and Cain both turned to look at the huntress who'd joined them.
Cain's lips flattened into a thin line of irritation. “Merely discussing possibilities. You know my partner, Violet?"
In pretty much the same sense that she knew all of the hunters. She recognized both the name and the face. “We didn't train together,” Amaryllis said non-committally.
Violet divided a look between Cain and Amaryllis and smiled thinly, then fixed Amaryllis with a significant look and jerked her head in the direction of the observation booth above them. “I just thought you might be interested to know that the dark twin has been released from the brig at last."
Amaryllis’ heart skipped a beat as she instinctively glanced in the direction that Violet had indicated. Dante was standing at the front of the observation booth. Beside him stood Reese. Her heart did a back flip when she saw that both were looking directly at her. Disconcerted, Amaryllis looked away again quickly, trying without success to keep the blood from rushing into her cheeks.
Violet, she saw, was smiling like the cat that ate the canary.
When she glanced at Cain, she saw that he was still studying the two in the observation booth.
He didn't look particularly pleased.
She didn't especially want to ask, but she couldn't seem to resist. “What makes you think he's been in the brig?"
Violet shrugged. “It's what we heard ... that one of the cyborgs had been caught harboring a huntress and was confined to the brig. Then, low and behold, you appeared in the barracks. Naturally, I assumed...."
As badly as Amaryllis wanted to wipe that smile off of Violet's face by knocking her head clean off her shoulders she didn't particularly want to end up in the brig herself. Besides, her thoughts were chaotic. She'd assumed that Dante had betrayed her, but it seemed less likely that he had if he'd been thrown in the brig for hiding her.
Did that rule out the possibility altogether, though?
She thought it might, but then she also thought there was a strong possibility that she wanted to believe he hadn't used her and then callously turned her in ... which meant she should distrust her reasoning since it was obviously tainted with emotionalism.
She absolutely didn't want to consider what sort of emotionalism might be involved. Moreover, she couldn't help but notice that both Cain and Violet were watching her with interest.
"Why did you call him the dark twin?” she asked, more because she was trying to turn the conversation to something less uncomfortable than because she had much interest.
"His brother, Reese, is fair,” Violet pointed out dryly.
A jolt went through Amaryllis. “Brother? They're cyborgs."
Violet chuckled. “And? Look at the two of them. Except for their coloring, they look like twins—which means they have to share at least one parent gene donor. Besides, I partnered with Reese. Don't tell me you partnered with Reese a year and a half and he never mentioned his twin brother, Dante?"
Chapter Eleven
Amaryllis reddened, but she saw she didn't have to say anything at all. Violet had read the answer in her expression.
She wanted nothing so much as to escape the inquisition, and the smug look on Violet's face, but there was no escaping the rec room until the cyborgs allowed them to leave.
She glanced at Cain, wondering if he'd set her up for Violet.
His expression was carefully neutral, but anger flickered in his hazel green eyes. “Is there a point to this, Violet?"
Violet shrugged. “I suppose you could say I was just testing the wind."
Cain's brows rose. “For what?"
She divided a malicious glance between Amaryllis and Cain and finally shrugged, and Amaryllis realized abruptly that jealousy was driving her. “As you were telling Amaryllis earlier, we'll be allowed to choose companions once we arrive at the colony. I was just curious to know what her interest was in Dante and Reese."
Amaryllis glanced from Violet to Cain and back again, restraining the temptation to glance toward Reese and Dante. She had the feeling, though, that Violet was more interested in Cain than either Reese or Dante.
Or, perhaps, she liked the looks of all three and didn't want competition until she'd decided which she would choose?
It must be nice to have that kind of confidence, however misguided it seemed to be.
With an effort, she pasted a smile on her lips. “Go for it. I really don't have any plans to stay."
It didn't take the smug smile on Violet's face to assure her she'd just left herself wide open. She knew the moment the words were out of her mouth that she'd allowed her chaotic emotions to overrule her wisdom—if she could claim any and she was beginning to think she no longer did if she ever had.
"You're leaving us?” Violet asked, pleased. “Exactly how do you plan to do that?"
"I hadn't made any plans,” Amaryllis said tightly, if not with complete truth. “However, they have said we are not going to be prisoners, and that implies that we'll have the right to choose to stay or to go. I'm just thinking I'd rather take my chances with my.... “She stumbled to a halt, horrified that she'd almost said ‘my own kind'. “Company,” she finished lamely.
Violet laughed. “Your company?"
"Give it a rest, Violet,” Cain said tightly.
Violet glared at him. “The crash screwed up her logic circuits.” Her eyes narrowed. “You really ought to consider whether it's a good idea to hang around her or not. The cyborgs are likely to take any escape attempts very badly."
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