The Trench Angel
Michael Keenan Gutierrez
A Novel
Leapfrog Press
Fredonia, New York
The Trench Angel © 2015 by Michael Keenan Gutierrez
All rights reserved under International and
Pan-American Copyright Conventions
No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a data base or other retrieval system, or transmitted in any form, by any means, including
mechanical, electronic, photocopy, recording or otherwise, without
the prior written permission of the publisher.
Published in 2015 in the United States by
Leapfrog Press LLC
PO Box 505
Fredonia, NY 14063
www.leapfrogpress.com
Printed in the United States of America
Distributed in the United States by
Consortium Book Sales and Distribution
St. Paul, Minnesota 55114
www.cbsd.com
Portions of this book were published in Scarab and Crossborder.
Author photo courtesy of Rebecca Ames
First Edition
EISBN: 978-1-935248-72-9
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Gutierrez, Michael Keenan.
The trench angel / by Michael Keenan Gutierrez.
pages cm
ISBN 978-1-935248-71-2 (paperback)
1. Photographers--Fiction. 2. Interracial marriage--Fiction.
3. Colorado--Fiction. 4. Mystery fiction. I. Title.
PS3607.U8175T74 2015
813’.6--dc23
2015008777
For Jessica
The piano played a slow funeral tune,
And the town was lit up by a cold Christmas moon,
The parents they cried and the miners they moaned,
“See what your greed for money has done.”
—Woody Guthrie
Contents
Part One
The Anarchist’s Son
The Somme River Valley
—1—
—2—
—3—
—4—
—Paris—
—5—
—6—
—7—
—8—
—9—
Paris
—10—
—11—
—12—
Part Two
The Handsome Man
—13—
—14—
Paris
—15—
—16—
Jesse
—17—
—18—
—19—
—20—
—21—
—22—
—23—
Meaux
Part Three
When Will These Masses End, Garatuza?
—24—
—25—
—26—
—27—
—28—
Belgium
—29—
Jesse
—30—
—31—
A Selective Bibliography
Acknowledgments
The Author
Part One
The Anarchist’s Son
The Somme River Valley
The men lined up for their pictures before they died. It was an orderly, single-file queue snaking through the trench, no pushing or shoving, none of that childhood hokum, because, after all, they were Englishman. Each held a letter addressed to his mum or sweetheart, brother or father, mostly commenting on the poorness of the weather or the morale of the men or even razzing the queer ways of the French, but they didn’t have any words for the war. How could you remember all of this and put it down on paper? When their turn arrived, they handed the letter to me, the Yank, and I raised my camera, the indestructible Miss Constance, then fired. The pose never changed—head tilted a smidge left, eyes wide—the same picture over and over again like a broken projector. You went through that death line enough times it became rote. Still, if I could go back, if I could somehow reenter the mind of my younger self, I’d have kept those photos, every last one of them, and I’d have put them all together in a book without a title because no pithy phrase could sum up those stares. When you’re young you never think you’ll forget anything let alone all of it. After a while, you forget all you’ve forgotten. Or you write it down.
Richard McDowell was next. He had a dark birthmark on his Adam’s apple and skin shaded like boiled egg yolks. It was McDowell who taught us to keep the lit end of the cigarette inside our mouths. The first couple times burned, but, afterward, it got so you liked the heat, the fire right beneath your brain. He passed me a letter addressed to his wife, June McDowell of Manchester, and I slipped it into my back pocket, between two dozen others, and then raised Miss Constance.
“Thank you,” McDowell said. They were like that, grateful.
The night before, McDowell confessed that he’d lost his memory of color. He could no longer remember the color of his mother’s flowers, the blues, greens, and reds that bloomed behind her house each spring. He’d forgotten the color of his wife’s eyes and his father’s beard. Even in the present, when he looked at his own hands, searching them by firelight, he couldn’t say their pigment.
“Brown,” I told him. “Your hands are brown like the rest of us.”
At the end of the line stood George Worthington. He’d been missing the top half of his left ear for a good year and he’d written nine different goodbye notes to his wife. He passed me the tenth.
“Don’t bother delivering my letter by hand,” he said. “She’s too pretty to bother with an American.”
“I’m married,” I said. This was true for another hour.
For Worthington, the war erased his conception of time. Moments from his childhood happened just last week. Sometimes, he said, he’d been stuck in France since Napoleon’s reign. A lot of men were like that, exiled in history, some as far back as the days of Nero, and one corporal could even recount tales of Babel. Before retreating to his own section of trench, Worthington told me, “And don’t sell the damn picture. I don’t want you to make a single bloody pence off me.”
I stepped away, stunned. Of course I’d never sell it. No one bought pictures of dead men anymore. Not since 1915. This was just a damned courtesy, or, as they liked to tell me, a courtesy for the damned. In any case, the remark reminded me of my father, the old anarchist, who had believed photographs stole a man’s right to his own time. He figured that if you could capture moment, print it, and profit from it, you made time just another commodity like coal, guns, or boots. You brought humanity that much closer to enslavement. That was the idea, at least.
I didn’t believe him, not when I was a kid and not that last morning on the Somme. But then again, I didn’t believe much of anything by then. Like a lot of men without experience, I’d held a devout faith in the power of ideas, but that was before the war, before I’d raised my camera to my first corpse and recorded my first death, back when I’d been a photographer of faces, rather than a chronicler of boots. Those ideas—the perfectibility of man, the progress of history, and the war that brought peace—lost their meaning on some marble orchard between Paris and Verdun. Yet, I wasn’t entirely faithless. I still trusted the reliability of memory, the photograph as truth, and the written word as meaningful. But t
he cause? Thinking about it in my soiled trench, my mud-crusted charnel house among the lice and vermin running the maze of spent shells, I struggled to find any inspiration that wasn’t propaganda. The armies marched behind liars and fools and, yes, I’d been complicit in the spreading of those lies, the propping of those fools. The whole lot of them—Haig, Falkenhayn, Joffre—could kill each other into the next year, the next decade, hell the next century, as far as I cared. By the time I took Worthington’s picture, I knew this was my last day on the Western Front.
Neal Stephens was quitting the Great War.
The guns fired, again. A thousand British cannons rained munitions upon the sopping German trenches. The men looked east, studying the ladders they’d soon mount. I turned west: there was nothing left to photograph. The landscape had returned to its original volcanic state—a sea of steaming sand rolling along the Earth’s crust—only a lone chimney teetering in no-man’s-land remained of civilization. It was like the view from my childhood home, where the Rocky Mountains, jagged and primeval, filled the bright horizon, teaching me that we were all just one plague away from returning to cave life. At the time, I thought I’d never return to Colorado. I’d told my wife that lie. But in that trench, during that first Great War, I believed myself honest because I was going to get her out of France, off the gray front, to a place where white men could live in matrimony with black women without fear of the hanging tree. That place was Lisbon.
The mines detonated and the ground shook like San Francisco. I, ever brave, quaked against a sandbag.
Imagine if they’d all gone off.
Most of them didn’t. They just went thud, a failure of European manufacturing. It could have been so much worse if all the ammo worked. I’ve heard you can go back to that same place along the Somme and see the trench and walk through a field where no-man’s-land used to be, and some say you can hear the whispers of the dead, but it’s really the wind through the wheat and if you’re not careful, if you don’t watch your step, you’re liable to trip over some unused shell, some unexploded mine, and then you too get to be whispering to the living in that field. That’s what they say.
A mess sergeant, James O’Keefe, poured me hot coffee with a lashing of rum. He was the dandy of the bunch, with a freshly trimmed moustache and slick hair coifed beneath his steel helmet that glimmered with a polished sheen, like a target. Next to him, Roland Reynolds, encrusted in mud, coated in lice, shuffled through his pack, making sure he had everything, and he had everything: a rifle fixed with bayonet, goggles, a shovel, two flares, a message book, a mess tin, a ground sheet, a water bottle, field dressings, spare socks, a shaving kit, a hand grenade, a gas helmet, a towel, an iron ration, wire cutters, some dry rations, and the collected works of Goethe in the original German, just in case. He also had the sledgehammer. Every tenth man got handed a sledgehammer and Reynolds drew the dime. If they’d taken the German trench, who knows, maybe they would have needed that sledgehammer.
From the twin rivers, a band of mist swept across the earth, but it wasn’t cover or camouflage. The sky was too clear. Once up top, a soldier could see clear to the Germans and the Germans could see clear to him. Rain fell a few hours earlier, but not much rain, just enough to give the mud a fresh sheen. If Eskimos have a hundred words for snow, and Americans have a dozen words for indifference, then trench soldiers had a thousand words for mud: mire, sludge, bogland, cunt-clay, blood-soil, death marsh, cock-slough. The morning rain turned the dirt into a heavy, clumpy mire that caked their uniforms, weighing down their seventy-pound packs another pound or two, but what was another pound or two when you were going to die?
They all died by the way. I should have said that before. Every last one of them died.
I crouched on the duckboard, and then drew Lorraine’s letter from my coat, unfolding it—I love you, Snowball and I’m here to bring you home. I’d read it near a dozen times that morning, going over each word like it was code, as if counting the syllables might illuminate some secret Masonic message, but she was honest and forthright and it was I who played games with language. I would read that letter a thousand times after that day, until one wet night in 1928 when I sat in a phone booth on the Negro side of Chicago and her letter crumbled in my fingers like a hieroglyphic scroll, and it was then that I knew I’d never remember what her face looked like again, but that was still a long ways away. In that moment, in that trench, my wife, my Lorraine, was still alive, safe in a Red Cross tent barely a mile away. I’d make things right with her. We’d get to Lisbon.
But of course it didn’t work out that way. It’s strange, now, to think about how those things I wanted so much when I was young, those places that I would have done anything to get to, are now, years later, the things that scare me the most. Lisbon’s like that for me. You couldn’t pay me enough to go there.
When the guns stopped, the absence of noise, the air empty of fire, made me dizzy. My boots sunk into the kind of mud that didn’t exist in America. I looked to the chimney, to my magnetic north, and settled myself. This spell, like something out of an antebellum romance, hit me whenever it got quiet. Soon now—ten minutes, a sergeant said. Orders arrived. Soldiers were not to assist the wounded. As an officer yelled for the men to stand ready, I pressed against the back of the trench, away from the condemned with a loaded Miss Constance. The Sergeants fixed trench ladders in place. Soldiers partnered up—taking turns affixing tin triangles to each other’s packs—making sure they shined for those watching the war play out through binoculars. There were no cries. This wasn’t the time for sentimentality. No maudlin speeches of camaraderie. Let the Germans weep.
I checked Miss Constance a third, a fourth time, then stepped back from the soldiers and raised her, hoping to get off one last shot, because, after all, it was nearly time for the dénouement.
The Captain opened his watch, the slow tick louder than Big Ben. Rats jostled over boots. Roaches burrowed into the mud. Everyone inhaled.
At seven-thirty, on the last tick, the Captain lipped the whistle, then blew. A half a million men sighed.
The unit commanders climbed first, then helped their men over the top, like they’d planned. Forward on, don’t stop. Even when the Germans opened their machine guns, even when their cannons filled the air with fire, the soldiers filed up the ladders like mourners entering a chapel. When the final officer went over, I was alone, the last man on Earth.
Two steps up the ladder, Miss Constance mounted on her dirt tripod, I squinted through the viewfinder. Brown boots on brown ground, at first in motion, then still, only the tread visible on film. I should have gone up with them, stood in the line of fire, and really gotten a good shot off, but that’s the thing with war photography: if I wanted to get a good picture I’d have to be willing to take a bullet.
A shell exploded, sending me to the dirt, my helmet riddled with metal fragments. I scurried along the duckboard with the rats, checking my fingers, my limbs, looking for a tunnel to hide in. My eyes burned and I breathed smoke and mud. When I stopped moving, when I tried to cough, I couldn’t smell anything, so I touched my face, wiping mud across it, relieved I still had a nose and a jaw because to me, then, the only thing worse than death was disfigurement.
I found myself sitting on the duckboard, my back to the war, lit a cigarette, and then watched the mud rain into the trench. Had my father been this scared? That’s what I asked myself. I was a stray bullet away from heaven, and I couldn’t think of anything more profound than the anarchist Jesse Stephens. He had that way about him, an ability to creep into the recesses of your memory, only to emerge unscathed when you’d been sure you’d gotten rid of him. Had all of the blood horrified him? Did it confirm all he’d believed about the corruption of governments? They said it was anarchists who brought this war upon us. It was an anarchist who sent me here.
On my feet, I looked through Miss Constance’s lens. More boots, just the treads showing. The Germans kept s
hooting, their Gatling guns firing round after round like a telegraph ticker. Even though it looked like the war was over and the Germans had won, I hoped to get off one more shot, something I could take to Lorraine, but I was always missing the point. Hell, if I’d had a better camera, one with a stronger lens, I might have seen past those boots, beyond the shell casings and the mine craters and the barbed wire, right up to those Germans manning that cannon aimed straight at me.
Maybe it was because of the cannon’s poor quality, or the soldiers’ miscalculations, that the shell sailed over the boots of dead Brits, over the barbed wire, over the trenches, and over me as I abandoned my trench and ran west toward the Red Cross tent, toward Lorraine.
The shell screeched over me in a colorless fire, incinerating my dual belief in the infallibility of truth and the reliability of memory just as solidly as if the damned thing had detonated square on my skull.
—1—
I heard the train long before I saw it, a march of steel charging along a stone embankment. It shook my boots and I raised my hat and let the rumble course my skin. The steam came next, a black plume hissing into the wind, followed shortly by the profile of the locomotive rolling through the white sagebrush, charging head-on toward me. From New Sligo, it would abandon the plains and cut due west, slipping through the shadows of Rocky Mountain canyons until it reached the Mormon desert and then speed toward the dark waters of San Francisco. From there, I could board a ship going just about anywhere.
Like most mornings, I had ended up watching the trains come and go. Back then New Sligo didn’t have a recognizable railway station, just a lean-to, along with a small radio room and a clock tower which was always a couple minutes behind, but that day it seemed like the whole town had come out to see the train. It was nearing midday and scores lined up to board and more would be here tomorrow and the day after that until New Sligo was just another ghost town: merchants with means sending their families to Eastern relatives; bankers with brass-plated steamer trunks taking long autumn holidays; even out-of-work miners, down to their last nickels, lolled about, hoping to jump an open freight. The few remaining employees tried to keep order, but their hearts weren’t in it. As the train slowed, the crowd hushed. This is why we’d all come.
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