by L. P. Dover
“Stop.” Gritting my teeth, I grabbed her hand and pulled it away. I was either making the worst decision ever, or the best. It felt like the worst; especially when her eyes grew dark. “This isn’t the kind of decision you want to make when you’re drunk. I’m not going to lie, it’s evident I want you, you’re a beautiful woman, but being with me will only fuck you up. I can’t do that to you.”
Leaning up on her toes, she grasped my face and squeezed. “I’m not scared. Life is about risks. I want to take this risk with you.”
I shook my head. “But I don’t want to take it with you.” It was a lie and I wished I could take it back the moment I said it. The level of hurt on her face would be something I’d always remember.
Grabbing the robe, she threw it on and ran out of my room, tears already welling in her eyes. I was a fucking idiot, but I refused to fuck her while she was intoxicated. Tomorrow would come soon enough and I could tell her how I felt. However, I had the feeling it was going to be too late.
Hadley
Two Days Later
For two days, I’d intentionally ignored Blake. Sneaking into his room was the single most embarrassing thing I’d ever done and I’d regretted it ever since. True, it might not have been the best decision at the time, but I didn’t know what else to do.
Blake tried to talk to me on numerous occasions, but I pretended he wasn’t there. I knew it was childish, yet I’d rather not face him than have to deal with the emotions. Anger was easier than rejection.
Tyla had just left for the day which sucked because I wanted to talk to her. Unfortunately, she was around dumbass all day. I couldn’t talk to Felicity about it since she’d told me not to get attached. The last thing I wanted was to hear her bitch at me. On a brighter note, Nick seemed to be doing a lot better. I had that to lift my spirits.
A car door slammed and I rushed to the window. Blake had just gotten in his truck and started down the driveway. Breathing a sigh of relief, I rushed downstairs and found a note on the kitchen counter.
Gone to the store. When I come back, we’re going to talk. You need to listen to me, even if I have to tie you up.
~ Blake
Tie me up? I wasn’t going to give him the satisfaction. Hearing his voice was enough to drive me insane. It was like a shot through the heart each time he’d say my name. Talking to him was out of the question.
Taking a bottle of water, I guzzled it down and grabbed an apple. The weather was a little cool with the sun hiding behind the clouds, but it was perfect to be outside. Blake let Snowflake and the other horses out to pasture and it was always fun to watch them interact with each other. Snowflake always frolicked along like she was the only one out there, and Nightshade played it cool, hanging out by the stream. I climbed up on the fence and took a bite of my apple. Nightshade’s ears perked up and he trotted over to me.
“I see how it is. You only want to come when I have treats.” I laughed. He nudged me with his nose, his big round eyes trained on the apple. “Let me have one more bite and then you can have it.” I leaned toward his ear and whispered, “Just don’t tell Snowflake. She’ll be angry.”
Holding the apple on my palm, he opened his mouth and grabbed it with his teeth. “You’re such a good horse. Why can’t your owner be as sweet as you?”
The sound of crunching gravel caught my attention. I turned to the driveway. “Dammit! He’s back already?” Shit, shit, shit. I patted Nightshade’s nose and hopped off the fence. “I gotta go, boy. I’ll give you another apple tomorrow.” By the time I got to the barn and peeked around the corner, Blake had already parked his truck in front of the house. I was hoping like hell he didn’t see me.
“Hadley, I know you’re out there,” he called. He took off his T-shirt and crammed it into his back pocket.
“Dammit,” I hissed, crouching down low.
“Don’t you think it’s time we talked? You can’t hide from me forever.” His footsteps grew closer, so I hid inside one of the empty stalls, hoping he’d walk past. I slid down into the corner and held my breath as he walked by. “I want to say I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings the other night.”
“Just drive the wedge in even harder, asshole,” I mumbled to myself.
“I need you to come out and talk to me. I can make you if I have to, which might be kind of fun for me. You don’t want me to enjoy this, do you?”
What I really wanted to do was smack him on the head. He was baiting me, but I couldn’t figure out the game.
“Hadley?” His voice grew farther away until I heard his footsteps leave the barn. Once I heard the patio door of the house slam shut, I knew I only had a couple of minutes to get out of the barn. Taking a deep breath, I slowly got to my feet and glanced over the stall; the coast was clear. I had no clue where I was going to go, but anything was better than being stuck in a stall.
The wooden door of the stall creaked and I froze. Fuck. I held my breath and listened, but there were no footsteps approaching. As quietly as I could, I tiptoed my way to the back entrance of the barn and turned the corner, only to run right into Mr. Let’s Talk. He reached for my hand, but I jerked away from him.
“You didn’t think you fooled me back there, did you?”
“Fuck you,” I spat, turning on my heel. I marched off but he followed close behind. “I have nothing to say to you.”
“Well, too bad. I have a shit-ton to say to you. Now stop being a childish brat and give me one minute.”
Sucking in a breath, I froze. Did he really just call me a childish brat? Gritting my teeth, I faced him head on. I half expected him to smirk, but there was nothing but seriousness in his stormy gray gaze.
“All right, this ends now,” I snapped, pushing on his chest. He stepped back, his jaw clenched tight. “You may think what I’ve done is childish, but I’m pissed and embarrassed. I show up naked in your room, just to have you turn me down; to tell me you wouldn’t want to take a chance on me. I may have had a little buzz at the beginning of the night, but I was nowhere near drunk. It was the only thing that gave me the courage to tell you how I felt.”
Huffing, I turned and marched out of the barn. “Now I just feel like a fucking idiot. So, by all means, make me sit down and hear all the reasons why you don’t want to be with me. Go ahead and call me childish. I don’t care anymore,” I said, waving my arms in the air. “At least I wasn’t afraid to let you in.”
My heart thundered in my chest. It felt good to scream out my feelings, but now they were no longer mine. Anger could make a person say just about anything.
Out of nowhere, a rope lassoed around my body. I screamed when it bit into my skin, burning as Blake tightened it, roping me in. I struggled to break free, but it was so tight, even my hands started to tingle. I tried to stand my ground, but the harder he pulled, the tighter it got.
“Dammit, Blake. Let me go! I can’t feel my hands.” I had no choice but to willingly move my feet. If I didn’t, he’d drag me across the ground through the dirt. My dignity was more important.
“You shouldn’t have walked away,” he growled, his voice by my ear. He jerked me around and pushed me into one of the empty stalls. I turned my face away, but he grabbed my chin. “I don’t think so, princess. You’re going to look at me when I say this. Do you want me to tie your hands and feet together too?”
I had no doubt he’d do it. “Fine,” I spat, lifting my glare to his. “What do you want?”
His lips closed over mine, hard and raw as he forced his tongue inside. I tried to fight him off, but it was a half-assed attempt. Who was I kidding? I didn’t want him to stop. Not to mention, I couldn’t move. I was at his mercy, and I liked it. He pushed me into the wall, rubbing his arousal against me. Moaning, I bit his lip and he pulled away.
“You,” he growled, leaning his forehead to mine. “I’ve always wanted you, even when you thought I didn’t.” He loosened the rope and pulled me into his arms, kissing me again.
My fingers tingled from the b
lood rushing to them, but I was able to get his jeans unbuttoned. I didn’t want to wait any longer. His cock jumped when I ran my hand down it, massaging him.
Blake grasped my lip between his teeth and groaned. “I’m sorry for what I said. It was lies, all of it. I never meant—”
“Shut up,” I said. There would be time for words later. “Just shut up and help me out of this shirt.”
His eyes sparked, then he lifted my shirt and unclasped my bra, freeing my aching breasts. I gasped when he closed his lips over my nipple, sucking it between his teeth. I grabbed onto his shoulders and everything inside of me tightened. I wrapped my legs around his waist and worked myself over his erection.
“Ah fuck,” Blake moaned. He unlatched my legs and kept his gaze on mine as he unbuttoned my jeans and slid them to the ground. I stepped out of them and he slid his fingers between my legs. My eyes rolled into the back of my head as he pushed one inside, then another.
He pulled them out and stared at me when he put them in his mouth. The level of raw intensity in his gaze made me tremble. I’d never had anyone look at me like that before. Lifting me in his arms, I wrapped my legs around his waist and he walked us over to a pile of hay bales and gently laid me down. My breaths came out quick, my heart thumping in my chest. The anticipation was torture.
Blake brushed the hair away from my face, his arousal aligning with my opening. When he pushed himself inside, I cried out and dug my nails into his back, relishing the feel of him stretching me wide. His thrusts grew hard and fast. I was so close to the edge, I was about to explode.
He trailed his lips to my neck and bit down, his fingers digging in to my hips. “You feel so fucking good.”
I rocked my hips against his and cried out as my release exploded through every nerve in my body. Blake followed closely behind, grunting as his cock pulsated inside me. My whole body trembled and I ached for more.
Still connected, he rested on his elbows and gazed down at me. “You okay, princess? At first, I thought maybe I hurt you.”
I shook my head. “It was a good hurt. It’s been a while since I’ve been with someone.”
“Look, I’m sorry for everything I said the other day. I knew that if I had one taste of you, it wouldn’t be enough. Letting you go won’t be easy.”
I grasped his face and kissed him. “You don’t have to. I’m right here.”
“But for how long?”
“As long as you want me to be.” He didn’t look convinced, but I didn’t want to hash out the details while I was still enjoying the post-sex glow. “Hey, at least now I know what it’s like to roll around in the hay. It’ll be perfect for my song.”
His lips spread wide. “Are you writing it about me?”
I shrugged. “Maybe. You’ll just have to find out when you hear it on the radio.”
“How are you going to write your music? You don’t have your guitar.”
He had a point. Mine was still at the house I never wanted to go back to. “I’ll figure it out.”
He winked and slowly pulled out of me. “I got you covered, princess,” he said, getting to his feet. Slipping on his jeans, he handed me the T-shirt he had stuffed in his back pocket. “You might need this.”
“Hello? Blake, you in there?” Tyla called out.
“Shit,” he hissed. Grabbing my shirt and bra, he tossed them to me and rushed out of the stall. I quickly wiped off with his shirt and threw my clothes on while he distracted her. The rake was just outside the stall so I fetched it and pretended to work.
“Hey girl, what’s up?” Tyla said. I turned and smiled at her, knowing my cheeks were bright red. Blake walked by and winked before disappearing out the other side of the barn.
I wiped my brow on the bottom of my T-shirt and realized it was on the wrong way. “Not much, just helping Blake clean these stalls,” I said.
She snorted. “Uh-huh. I bet you were. You might want to tell that lie to someone who believes you. I can tell when a girl’s been thoroughly fucked.” She pointed at my clothes. “Your shirt’s on wrong and you have hay all up in your hair. All I can say is, it’s about damn time.”
Laughing, I said, “Don’t I know it.”
“What are you doing?” Blake asked, taking a seat beside me. He glanced down at the papers in my lap and leaned over.
“Hey!” I shrieked, covering them with my hand. “No peeking. It’s a new song. I can’t let anyone see it until after it’s done.” After the day I’d had with Blake, and riding with Tyla, I had never felt more inspired to write.
“Will you sing it for me?”
Smiling, I folded up my lyrics and tucked them down the side of my chair. “Maybe. But I never sing new songs in front of people, except in the studio. I have this fear everyone will hate it.”
His brows furrowed. “Why do you care? You’re successful already. Your fans love you.”
“It’s not that simple,” I said, turning to him. “When I write my songs, it’s a part of me, a part of my soul. The thought of people hating them scares me. That’s why I never sing newly written songs at my concerts.”
“I can understand that, but I don’t think you have anything to worry about.” He kissed my cheek and got to his feet. “Wait here, I have something for you.”
I wondered what it could be. The answer came when he walked out the back door. Eyes wide, I stood and gaped at the beauty in his hands. “Oh my God, it’s amazing. Is it yours?”
He handed me the most beautiful guitar I’d ever seen in my life. It didn’t even look used.
“I’m not musically inclined. Give me a gun and I’m good to go. It’s actually my grandfather’s. He fiddled around with it, thinking he’d have time to learn, but it never happened. I figured you could have it.”
“Have it?” I gasped.
He shrugged. “Why not? I’m not going to use it. He’d be happy to know I gave it to someone who will.”
I ran my hands down the shiny wood. It was better than the one I had at home. “Thank you, Blake. This means a lot.”
Taking a seat in front of me, he nodded toward it. “Go ahead and try it out. I’d love to hear you play.”
I’d never played one on one with anyone other than my mother. She used to love listening to me play. Taking a deep breath, I sat down on the edge of my seat and strummed my fingers across the chords. I hadn’t realized how much I missed the sound. The entire time I played, Blake never took his eyes off of me. I wanted to sing for him, to let him hear his song, but I couldn’t do it. It wasn’t anywhere near ready yet.
“Do you think that’s a good beat?” I asked.
“Is that the one to your new song?”
I nodded. “I think so. It’s different from my other songs, but I think it’ll work.”
He leaned over and placed his hands on my thighs. “I don’t exactly listen to country music, but I think it kicks ass.”
“So you live out here, parading around in your cowboy getup, and you don’t listen to country music?”
He shrugged. “What can I say? It’s the look that gets the ladies, not the lame music.”
“You’re such an ass,” I said, rolling my eyes.
“Hey,” he said, his gaze serious. “I didn’t say your stuff was lame. I like that you write your songs based on the people you care about. It’s real. Your music has emotion to it.”
“Thanks. I like to make people feel.”
A small smile splayed across his lips. “You want to help me feel?”
Giggling, I set the guitar down and kissed him. “I think I might enjoy that. Where do you suggest I start?”
“Oh, I don’t know . . . maybe in the shower?” His smile alone turned me on. He had those bedroom eyes that would be perfect for magazines.
Biting my lip, I grabbed his hands. “My shower or yours?”
He chuckled. “I don’t know, I think we should give them both a go.”
“Okay, but first I need to call Felicity. She expects me around noon, that way she knows
to pick up the phone. Apparently, the media keeps harassing her for a story.”
Blake shook his head. “Do you deal with that shit every day?”
“Not like that. There aren’t too many people who have my phone number. It’s going to be interesting when I get back though. My mailbox is probably full.”
I wanted to talk to him about what we were going to do when I left, but I didn’t want to ruin the moment. Everything was all new and vulnerable. The odds of the relationship working was stacked against us, but I had to believe we could make it work. Blake wasn’t the type to balk at a challenge. Hopefully, he would see us as one and try to prove the world wrong.
When we got to his room, he disappeared into the bathroom and turned on the shower. I grabbed my phone and dialed Felicity’s number. It rang and rang, but then she finally picked up and all I could hear were a bunch of people in the background, talking and laughing.
“Felicity, you there? It sounds like you’re having a party. What’s going on?” I said.
“That’s because she is,” someone else answered.
Gasping, I threw a hand over my mouth and sat on the bed. “Nick? Is it really you?”
He chuckled, then hissed in pain. “Yeah, it’s me. Remind me not to laugh though. You’d think after two weeks of healing, I’d be up and moving around.”
Blake leaned against the door frame, his body tense. When I looked at him, he stared back at me, but then averted his gaze and left the room. I wanted to go after him, but I couldn’t.
“I miss you,” Nick murmured in my ear.
“I miss you too. I hate that I couldn’t be there for you. Everyone thought it best I left. As soon as they catch the guy, I’m coming home.”
“What have you been doing all this time?” he asked.
All I could think about was Blake, but it wasn’t the time to tell him about that. “Things you could never imagine me doing,” I said. “But, I have to admit, I love where I’m at. When everything goes back to normal, I need to see about buying some property out here. It’s been good for the creativity . . . and it’s helped keep everything that’s been going on off my mind.”