by John Lutz
“So is the burning of witches.”
“Meaning?”
“The people who did the burning, they were the real murderers.”
The flesh around Ferris’s mouth twitched involuntarily, not at all like a smile. He went pale and stood rigid with rage, eyes gleaming with a hate that needed fear to fuel such intensity. “We’re done talking,” he said. There was a fleck of spittle on his taut lower lip.
Nudger snapped the notebook closed. “All right.”
“You’ve got more than your quota of nerve, coming around here spying and pretending to be what you’re not. It’s a good thing you outweigh me by twenty or thirty pounds.” “Don’t let that stop you,” Nudger said.
Ferris looked remotely puzzled and backed away. The perplexed expression changed feature by feature into one of defiance. “You threatening me?”
“You’re a sick bastard, Ralph.”
Ferris laughed and licked the fleck of spittle from his lip with a darting tongue. “You’re just saying that because I told you what you didn’t want to hear. But it’s the truth, and you know it and have to eat it.”
Nudger was struck by a wave of revulsion for this skinny, venomous, self-righteous antagonist. Or was it possible that the revulsion really was for what Ferris had told him? Either way, the anger would follow. Nudger could feel it building to bursting inside him. He wanted to get out of there before it escaped and took control of him. He tossed the notebook in through the Volkswagen’s window, onto the passenger’s seat, opened the door, and got back in behind the steering wheel.
“Did you learn more than you bargained for?” Ferris asked tauntingly, as Nudger started the engine.
“Everybody always does,” Nudger said. He worked the shift lever into gear. “Incidentally, Ferris, she gets the job.”
“Fine,” Ferris said. “They can give her a mallet and put her in charge of tenderizing the meat. She’d like that.”
Nudger fought hard not to yank the wheel to the right and run over Ferris, as he pulled the Volkswagen away from the curb and accelerated down the street.
“Think about what I told you next time you’re with Claudia!” Ferris yelled behind him. Probably everybody on Nightingale Drive heard. Probably they’d heard it before.
Nudger still had plenty of time before his appointment with Kelly. He stopped at a motel on Lindbergh and went into the lounge. It was a quiet, dim place with a faintly dampish odor, as if the carpet might be moldy. He got a draft beer at the bar and carried it to a booth near the entrance to the lobby, where the dampness hadn’t reached. He’d decided to skip supper entirely and give his digestive system a rest. It had to need it, after his conversation with Ralph Ferris.
Unpleasant though the experience had been, Nudger was glad he’d talked with Ferris. If nothing else, it had convinced him of one thing. It wasn’t because he was Claudia’s former husband that Nudger disliked Ralph Ferris; it was because Ferris was damned unlikable. Nudger was pleased. Possibly that was what he had needed confirmed.
Halfway through his beer, he’d managed to shove the conversation with Ferris to the back of his cluttered mind. He thought instead of Jeanette Boyington. There sure was a lot of hate in the world.
He sat wondering about Jeanette. The woman almost vibrated with her unbending commitment to vengeance. Maybe Hammersmith was right about how the surviving twin of a murder victim might feel. Maybe Jeanette thought that when Jenine had died, a flesh-and-blood part of herself had been slain. Nudger remembered how Danny had acted while talking about his twin brother who had been dead for decades. And weren’t there studies that showed how identical twins separated at birth developed remarkable similarities in their behavior even though they had never met? Who really knew what complex universal equations ruled the lives of twins? Ruled the lives of us all?
Nudger decided that he shouldn’t be thinking this way after only half a mug of beer. It was unnatural and uncharacteristic. It could lead to error. Save the metaphysics for good Scotch, Dr. Shamus.
He went to the phones in the motel lobby and dialed Natalie Mallowan’s number, hoping he could catch her at home and remind her of his nine hundred dollars.
When he got no answer, he called Claudia to try to arrange to see her tonight or tomorrow. No answer there, either. No one seemed to be home tonight. No one other than Ralph Ferris.
Nudger hung up the phone, feeling an unaccustomed emptiness after not being able to talk with Claudia. He was beginning to understand why he’d had to go to the Ferris house on Nightingale Drive. It was part of Claudia’s past, which made it part of Nudger’s future. He felt a need to acknowledge and fully reckon with her life with Ralph Ferris, to know what he could about it, place it in its proper mental slot, and so reduce it to a negligible factor in his relationship with her.
He felt an overpowering desire to talk with Claudia’s daughters, to explain some things about their mother so they might understand her better. He could imagine what Ralph Ferris told them about her.
His drive to the Nightingale house on what had seemed a whim had been significant and irreversible, Nudger belatedly realized. That people had time to contemplate forks in the road of life was a lie. Usually they went one way or the other without realizing it, and could only gaze back over their shoulder as those fateful three-way intersections faded into the past.
He stood supporting himself with one hand fisted against the wall. It had been a depressing day and a demanding evening. For a moment he considered driving home, taking in the Cardinals’ game on television, and forgetting about the appointment with Kelly. Forgetting about everything except hits, runs, and errors, and how nice it felt to be dozing off on the soft sofa instead of meeting another might-be murderer.
But he knew he wouldn’t return to his apartment. He couldn’t. He was destined to remain a while longer in the legions of those not home, doing his job. It was a job he often loathed, but it was all he had, a burden and a salvation.
He went out the lobby door to the parking lot and walked toward his car, trying to decide which was the most direct route to Twin Oaks Mall, forgetting all about going home.
XXII
Or maybe Nudger was home. The area around the Twin Oaks Mall fountain was beginning to seem as much like home as his apartment. He settled down on his customary concrete bench to wait for Kelly.
The mall was more crowded in the evenings than during the afternoons. And there were more male shoppers, more family units of husband, wife, and trailing, misbehaving offspring. The tempo of the mall was quicker. Fewer shoppers were here for idle recreation. Now the real business of buying was being conducted by many of the people hurrying past. Mr. and Mrs. Consumer, marching to the rhythms of the latest catch phrases and advertising jingles. Nudger sat back and observed the orderly lockstep madness. It was enough to make him wish he had disposable income.
A gray-haired man, easily in his seventies, sat down gingerly on the opposite end of Nudger’s bench and sucked on a nasty-looking black briar pipe, all the time watching the passing parade of women with his weary but interested eyes. A couple of young boys ran up to the fountain and tossed coins in, then threaded their way at high speed back into the crowd. Two teenage girls in tight jeans walked past chattering and giggling. The old guy on the bench, probably a retiree well out of the melee, useless now to the mall except as a consumer of dentifrice and laxative, looked on with approval before fixing his wandering gaze on a buxom woman yanking a pre-schooler along behind her. Nudger had played this scene over and over during the past week. Home, all right.
With the old man, Nudger watched the woman with chest and child until she veered and entered the drugstore. When he looked away from her, there was Kelly.
Nudger glanced at his wristwatch. Kelly-and he was immediately sure it was Kelly-was on time to the minute. He was indeed close to six feet tall, but he was so broad through the chest and shoulders that he appeared shorter. He was wearing a black shirt with pearl buttons, and neatly creased gray sl
acks, all as Jeanette had described. But what claimed Nudger’s wary attention was Kelly’s full head of very curly coarse blond hair. Nudger let his gaze drop to Kelly’s hands. They looked as if they could crush a week-old Danny’s Dunker Delite.
Kelly’s features were broad and flat, and because of their blandness barely missed being handsome. He wasn’t at all fat, but he was wide through the waist, hips, and thighs. His arms were tanned and muscular, dusted with blond hair, with wrists as thick as many men’s ankles. Not more than two hundred pounds, but a born strongman, the kind that made natural college halfbacks or ends that could block.
As Kelly rested a foot on a concrete planter and looked around with wide-set blue eyes, Nudger pretended to study the shoppers streaming toward him, as if someone were keeping him waiting. He felt Kelly’s gaze slide over him like a cool wave that stirred the hairs on the back of his neck. Wearing a carefully neutral expression, Nudger glanced at the blond man with seeming disinterest.
Kelly was looking away from him now with those ominously guileless blue eye, eyes so emotionally void that they must conceal much, placidly surveying the throng of shoppers. Then he walked over to the circular concrete bench encompassing the fountain, sat down as if settling in for a wait, and began gnawing on a hangnail on his right ring finger.
He gnawed persistently for quite a while, although without real concentration, his wrist twisted at an awkward angle to allow him to use his incisors. He was lucky not to dislocate his arm.
Finally he gave up gnawing, then waiting, and began walking toward the main exit. Nudger stood up from the hard bench and followed.
Kelly strode slowly past the cafeteria, toward the glass doors that would let him out onto the lower-level parking lot. Despite his bulk he moved in a glide, with a jungle cat’s grace. Nudger’s Volkswagen was parked on the upper-level lot. There was no time for him to rush to his car and drive to the lower level with any expectation of spotting Kelly again in the acres of parked cars. All Nudger could do was stay behind the blond man and try to get his car’s description and license-plate number.
Nudger felt an undeniable shameful relief. Kelly was one of those men who had about him an air of controlled menace, of barely restrained, unpredictable violence seething beneath a crude, calm exterior. A gut-deep tough man, close to the primal.
He surprised Nudger. Instead of going to a parked car when he got outside, Kelly turned and followed the walk bordering Sears’ display windows. He stopped and stood in a relaxed wide stance, with his hands clasped behind him, a few feet from a bus stop sign.
Nudger’s cowardly relief left him and his stomach came to bothered life again, spurring him on as he hurried back through the mall to the escalators and the upper-level parking lot.
He didn’t know if he was disappointed or not when he drove the Volkswagen into the lower-level lot and saw Kelly still lolling at the bus stop. Nudger found a parking space from which he could observe Kelly, positioned the Volkswagen between the yellow lines just so, switched off the engine, and waited.
Not for long. Within ten minutes the Cross County Express belched and snorted its way through the lot and hissed to a stop, blocking Nudger’s view of Kelly. Half a dozen shoppers got out through the rear door. The bus rumbled mightily and emitted heat-shimmering black diesel exhaust, then disembarked from the curb.
Kelly was gone from where he’d been standing.
Nudger backed the Volkswagen out of its parking slot and followed the bus.
They drove east, through a string of west-county bedroom suburbs, all the way into the city. Kelly got off the bus near Oakland and Kingshighway and stood at another stop on the west side of Kingshighway, waiting to transfer to a southbound bus.
As Nudger parked on Oakland and kept Kelly in view, he pondered the fact that the man had used public transportation to get to his intended meeting with Jeanette. Certainly the women Kelly met had cars, or he would assume so. Kelly’s own car-if he owned one-would be a hindrance and possible incriminating complication if he left it in a parking lot while he did murder. It fit, this use of the buses to meet intended victims.
Or maybe Kelly simply didn’t have a car. Or maybe he had one and it was in the shop. Maybe Kelly wasn’t a murderer, just a lonely guy making blind dates by phone.
Maybe Nudger should be careful about leaping to convenient conclusions.
The Kingshighway bus rumbled to a stop, and Kelly and two other passengers boarded. Nudger waited until the bus would be far enough ahead of him, then pulled out into the Oakland Avenue traffic and made a right turn on Kingshighway.
The bus was stopped for a red light a block ahead. Nudger joined the line of cars behind it. He didn’t have to worry about mistaking another bus for it; this one sported a large liquor advertisement below its dusty rear window, on which someone had lettered HOT STUFF with red spray paint across the seductive likeness of a slinky blonde in a black silk evening gown.
Nudger couldn’t have gotten close to the bus if he’d tried. Traffic was heavy on Kingshighway, moving irregularly as cars slowed or stopped to make left turns into side streets. Nudger didn’t regard that as a problem. From the angle he had, he could catch occasional glimpses of Kelly’s blond head through one of the bus’s side windows.
But when traffic thinned out near Magnolia, Nudger was surprised to see that Kelly was gone.
Like that. As if Houdini had had a hand in it.
Possibly he’d switched seats. Nudger hadn’t seen him get off at any of the stops the bus had made. A horn blared as Nudger veered the Volkswagen into the outside lane.
When he caught up with the bus, which now contained only a few passengers, he still couldn’t see Kelly inside. He dropped back half a block and continued following the bus, but with a self-deprecating kind of hopelessness. He could actually taste the bitter frustration of having gotten so close to the man who might be Jenine’s killer, only to lose him again through bad luck. Or through incompetence.
Nudger followed the bus all the way to its turnaround point, where it would stand empty before looping in a wide U-turn to make its northward run. The end of the line.
No Kelly.
Somewhere between Tholozan Avenue, where Nudger was sure he’d seen him through the bus window, and Magnolia, where Nudger was sure Kelly was no longer on the bus, Kelly had stepped from the rear door onto the sidewalk with some other passengers and disappeared. It had to have happened when Nudger was well back from the bus, when his view of the bus stop had been partially blocked by stalled traffic.
Nudger sat in the parked Volkswagen and slapped too hard at a mosquito perched on his forearm. He missed the mosquito. He hurt his arm. Letting two antacid tablets dissolve in his mouth, he turned the car around and drove back the way he’d come, ignoring his mosquito antagonist as it explored the far corner of the windshield. A truce of sorts.
Within fifteen minutes he caught up with a northbound Kingshighway bus. It had the same sexy advertisement below its back window, the slender blonde in the black silk gown. He noticed that the ad wasn’t what he’d thought. It wasn’t a liquor advertisement at all. It was an ad for Tabasco sauce, and the words HOT STUFF weren’t sprayed on by a vandal but were made to look that way, part of the copy. some ad man’s contribution to creativity. A real eye-catcher.
Nudger actually groaned as he realized his mistake. somewhere along the way he might have begun tailing a different bus. He had stupidly followed an advertising poster instead of Kelly. A poster that was probably one of hundreds being carted around the city.
In a burst of frustration, he slapped the bucket seat next to him, stinging his palm. He wondered if drinking an entire bottle of Tabasco sauce in one sitting might prove fatal. He wished he had an ad man to try it on.
XXIII
Have you ever worn a black silk evening gown while cooking with Tabasco sauce?” Nudger asked Claudia. “No. It sounds kinky.”
Nudger sat at Claudia’s kitchen table, nursing an icy Budweiser and enjoying watc
hing Claudia prepare dinner. She had every burner glowing on the old white four-burner stove, busying herself from pot to skillet to pot. She was a good cook, a practiced cook, though not necessarily the kind that could blend gourmet dishes. She was more of a specialist in the basic, in the sort of food that was no less tasty because it was recognizable on the plate. Corn on the cob was boiling in one pot, green beans simmering in another, potatoes heating in a third. In an old, heavy skillet, she was pan-frying the steaks Nudger had brought. Country cooking.
He liked the here and now of his life, he decided. There was a pleasant domesticity to it. Though Claudia wasn’t wearing an apron, she was dressed in wifely-enough fashion in a sleeveless print blouse, denim skirt, and practical square-toed shoes that tried but failed to detract from the graceful turn of her ankles. Her dark hair was worn pulled back and pinned in a loose bun, emphasizing the symmetrical leanness of her face and making her deep-brown eyes seem enormous. she was obviously enjoying what she was doing, in fact seemed so absorbed in it that at times Nudger wondered if she remembered he was there. The simmering food gave off tantalizing cooking scents that mingled in the tiny kitchen. The beer was cold, the woman was warm. All very snug and right. Life on the upswing.
Nudger had thought his day was completely ruined when he lost Kelly. Listening to Jeanette’s cold anger after he’d reported to her on Kelly hadn’t improved his mood, either. But when Nudger had returned to his office, there was a new client, a six-foot-four, two hundred and fifty pounder who described himself as a small businessman, and who wanted his lawyer investigated. Nudger had taken the job, received a reasonable retainer, and immediately phoned Eileen.
What a princess! She had agreed to give Nudger more time to pay all back alimony on the condition that he mail her the retainer he’d just received. He’d gotten a money order made out to her, pocketed the part of the retainer he hadn’t told her about, and mailed her the few hundred dollars to hold her at bay. It was something like tossing a cheese-burger to a trailing wolf.