Redemption

by Alla Kar

  I bit my tongue to hold in a pathetic whimper. “I want to help you. I want you to know that I’m not judging you, and I see the way you look at me. Everyone deserves a second chance—,”

  Rage gripped my upper arms, yanked me up and pinned me against the nearest wall, his mouth a hairbreadth’s away from my parted one. “I’m a fucking low down, dirty criminal and you want me?” he whispered. “You don’t know the real me, Neveah. You don’t know the fucked up shit I’ve done. The demands a true drug dealer has for his employees. His fucking puppets,” he whispered, his voice the roughest velvet I’ve ever felt against my skin.

  Holding his gaze, I tried to clear my thoughts, stop the overwhelming euphoria going off in my head from the smell of him. “We’ve all fucked up,” I whispered. “But that doesn’t make you a bad person. The fact that you care about your sister and would put your own life at jeopardy for her, shows me you’re a different man inside than you are out.”

  He groaned. “I’m not this good guy you think I am, and I’m not some prince charming, Champ. I know that’s what you need me to be, but it’s not that simple—not yet. This mission to get my sister in a dead-end. Dante and I both know it, and I refuse to put you in the middle of it.”

  I opened my mouth to argue but he stopped me with a kiss. A bone melting, hot and deep, but slow and torturous kiss. When he pulled back, his eyes were dilated, his mouth opened in a heavy pant. “Do you know what you do to me?” he whispered. “Do you know how long I’d wanted to touch you before I did? Or that fact that I’d prayed someone would find me—and it was you. God sent me you.”

  Tears swelled the corners of my eyes. The truth was riding on his tongue, and there was no way I was going to make a peep to stop it. “You saved my life and you’re making me crazy with your filthy mouth.”

  I panted against him, my hardened nipples brushed against the hardness of his chest. “Then do something about it,” I rasped, my vision threatening to give, stars danced along the corners.

  His lips turned upward into a greedy smile that I felt in my toes. “You don’t have to ask me twice.”

  One flat palm pressed against my stomach, and the other pulled my shirt over my head. He tossed my shirt to the side, his index finger slid up my hot skin until he cupped my jaw, prying my mouth apart with his own.

  I let myself relax into the hardness of his body, tangled my fingers into his hair and pulled him closer. There wasn’t any denying how badly this would probably turn out. Though I was sure neither one of us cared anymore. “I love your taste,” he whispered into my mouth. “I craved it after I kissed you in the barn.”

  Keeping his eyes on me, he unzipped my jeans, shimmed them down my legs and grasped me under my ass. The hard bulge in his underwear pressed against my drenched panties. I whimpered, helplessly, clutching his shoulders like someone tried to pry me away.

  Slowly, he walked me to the bed and tossed me down like a man on a mission. He never took his eyes off of me while he stripped out of his clothes. “Do you know what I’ve done with these hands?” he asked.

  My body ignited thinking about how strong they were. Each tanned, long finger had done things unimaginable—but yet, they were so soft and gentle on my skin. “Bad things,” I whispered, watching as he slid out of his underwear.

  His cock fell heavy against his thigh, his right palm wrapped around the base. With a dark gaze, he started to stroke himself. “Terrible things,” he whispered. “And you still want me?” He lifted his chin in a challenge.

  Lava seeped down my veins. I wanted him like I’d never wanted anything else before. Like I’d wanted to box growing up. “I still need you.”

  Something crazy crossed his face, but he knelt down in front of me, jerked my thighs apart and shoved his finger inside of my pussy. He watched as my eyes rolled back in my head. “That’s it, baby,” he whispered. “I can’t wait to stretch out this tight little pussy.”

  I was so wet my body hurt for him. My back arched, my fingers dug into the bed beneath me. “Please.”

  He slowed his pace, dropped his head and kissed along the inside of my thigh. “I’m going to lick, kiss and suck on you until my fucking mouth feels like it’s going to break.”

  Oh God … I squirmed beneath him. His hands pinned me down by my thighs, and before I could protest, he pressed his mouth against my pussy, sliding his tongue deep inside of me. “Oh God,” I moaned, raking my hands through his hair, yanking with each swipe of his tongue.

  I rocked against his face, enjoying the feel of his facial hair against the insides of my thighs, his hot breath pushed me closer to the edge. “So sweet,” he mumbled against me. “So goddamn sweet.”

  Tears brimmed my eyes, my hips rocked to the rhythm he provided with his tongue. Need built in my stomach, and a desperate moan escaped my throat. His lips pulled into a smile against me, his laugh sent my heart into a rampage against my ribs. When I felt his middle finger slid into me, breaking through any chance I had at composure, I come undone, on his face. He ate me like candy, licking up every drop of lust that erupted from my body.

  Stars danced along my vision, a heavy release softened me. Rage kissed up my stomach, slowly dipping his tongue into my belly button, one hand still stroking my drenched pussy. “I’ve never had a great memory,” he whispered against my skin. “But, your face,” he lifted his head, “I memorized it the day you saved me. Your eyes, your small straight nose. Dark hair I wanted to sink my fingers into. Your mouth—,” he pressed his lips against mine. “I’ll never forget how fucking beautiful you are, Neveah.”

  I’m beautiful? Has he looked in a mirror? A second finger entered me. A small devious smile rose the corner of his mouth. “The way you moan.” He closed his eyes like my moan could undo him. “The way you whisper my name. I want you so badly that I’d give up anything to have you.”

  My head flopped helplessly to the bed. I arched my back, giving him full access to my neck. He chuckled, biting a path up my stomach, stopping to suck my peaked nipples into his mouth before kissing my neck. “Do you want me like I want you?” he whispered.

  He knew, but he wanted to hear me say it. “Yes.”

  He nodded, increasing the pace of his fingers. “Do you want my cock where my fingers are right now?”

  “Please.”

  His breathing heaved, the fingers inside of me moved faster. His intense grey eyes looked back at me from under hooded lids. “You want me in that tight, little, pink pussy?”

  The dirty taste of his words set me on fire. I’d never been talked to so naughty. “Yes,” I pleaded, sinking my fingers into his hair. “Fuck me hard.”

  The playful hint in his smile vanished when he pulled his fingers from me. Something serious crossed his face. “I want you without a rubber. Are you on birth control?”

  Without a rubber? Jesus, yes. “Three years,” I panted. “I’ve been on it for three years.”

  He nodded, slowly, his eyes making a sweep down my body and then back. “I’m clean. They test us when we go in and when we leave prison.”

  I nodded. “I get checked every six months.”

  “I’m going to make you scream, Angel.”

  I didn’t deny him or answer. I just waited, hungrily. When he crawled on top of me, there was something different in his eyes, more human than before. The beast that’d fucked me senseless before was there, but he’d forced himself to be gentle—his hands tangled in my hair, his mouth hot on mine. The kiss went on until I was thrusting my hips against him, shaking and begging him to take me where he’d taken me before. “Eager, little kitten,” he mumbled, reaching between us to grab the base of his cock.

  He pressed against my entrance. “Please,” I begged, rolling my hips to meet him, trying to gain his attention.

  It worked. He filled me in one solid thrust, stretching me, throwing every inch of himself inside of me. He fit like a spandex glove, my pussy clutched him, like I’d never get enough. “Oh, so sweet and tight,” he mumbled, pulling my nape
to give him better access to my mouth.

  If I hadn’t been fully awake because of his cock inside of me, I’d thought I was in Heaven. His mouth was gentle, his hips rolled in a little faster rhythm. I could tell by the way his shoulders tensed that he’d tried to keep control. The beast inside of him clawed to get out but he took his time.

  I dug my nails into his skin. “Harder,” I begged.

  He nipped my bottom lip before sucking it into his mouth. “I’m trying to show you,” he groaned out, pulling tighter on my hair, “how I want to keep you.”

  Keep me? The taste of those words dripped of a promise that I wasn’t sure he could keep. I wanted him to want me—to need me. There was such promise on his face, such a genuine confession that my cheeks burned red. “Are you blushing?” he whispered. “I’m balls deep inside of you, and my confession to want to keep you, embarrasses you?” The slight lift of his brow embarrassed me more.

  “It’s just—I believe you,” I whispered.

  His fingers caught my jaw. “You should,” he mouthed. “I do want to keep you. Do you want to be kept? Do you want me for more than just this?” He rolled his hips. “Do you want more than my cock?” he asked, suddenly aggression dripped from him like sweat.

  “Yes.”

  He watched me like he debated my answer before he drug himself slowly out of me, touched my bottom lip and slammed back into me.

  I came undone with one single thrust, my body jerked and arched against the bed.

  When my gaze landed on him, the sensitive boy hiding inside of him had gone to bed for the night. “Good, baby,” he whispered. “Now it’s time to get fucked.”

  Chapter Eighteen

  Neveah

  I was up when the sun hit my blinds the next morning. My eyes ached for sleep, but there was no way in Hell I got any. Not after the night before. He’d fucked me the entire night. I’d only been in my bed for an hour when the sun rose.

  My body ached when I stretched. He’d promised that too. The things he whispered to me while pounding me into oblivion still scorched my cheeks. ‘I want you to feel me inside of you with every fucking step tomorrow. Remember how I fucked you.’

  Oh, I wasn’t forgetting.

  Despite the fact that I didn’t care he’d gone to prison, I wanted proof. Proof that he’d told me the truth. And he had told me the truth. I’d checked online. There was something else teetering in his gaze, something worse, and it thrived me to know it. To know everything about him. But I knew there probably wasn’t much he hadn’t done. He’d never exactly said but he’d hinted and I’d caught the most of it.

  Lucy jarred my bed with her paws, and it was a great distraction from the war going on in my head. There were more questions I wanted to ask, but my mouth had been preoccupied with his.

  Prison. The torment in his eyes when he told me what Denver did to him shredded my heart. And despite the fact that he’d withheld information that was crucial, I felt the desperation he had for finding her.

  That led to the wide-eyed sunrise. I was going to help him whether he wanted the help or not. I knew it was a bad idea, fuck, I was putting myself in harm’s way for him. And for what? Because I wanted him, or because I felt his touch in my bones. Or because he wanted to keep me.

  I drug my covers from my bed and sluggishly walked to the kitchen. Dad chugged the orange juice carton, his brows raising over the rim when he saw me. “Well,” he looked at the clock on the microwave, “look who is up before seven. I’ll be damned.”

  I made a grand show of flipping him off. He didn’t know my early rising had more to do with the boxer I was falling for in the guest house. “Whatever,” I mumbled, snatching the remains of the orange juice. “You’re not living alone for the next three months, so could you maybe not drink out of the carton?” I asked, pouring myself a glass.

  Dad laughed. “And you’re still a bitch in the morning.”

  I grinned over my glass. “I hear bitchiness is genetic.”

  Dad patted Lucy’s head before walking toward the door. “How about that match last night? I can’t believe he delivered a TKO in a practice match and his first fight. He’s a champ, Neveah.” Dad turned toward me, all laughter gone. “He’s going to be great.”

  He would be great. Until everyone found out the truth. That he’s rap sheet was bigger than everything in Texas. “He did really well.”

  Dad blankly stared at me. “You look like you’re someplace else. You okay?”

  “I’m fine,” I lied. “I’m going to go for a jog and then get some laundry finished before I head over.”

  Dad grabbed the door knob. “Run with Declan. See you later.”

  I nodded absently, waiting for the door to click behind him. Every emotion imaginable suffocated me once I knew I was alone. My wobbly legs finally went limp, and I hit the floor. Lucy sat beside me, her nose on my shoulder. “I’m okay, girl.”

  ***

  Chase bounced around the ring, his gloves in front of his face. I strained to focus on each step he took, on the placement of his feet.

  But I was too aware of him watching me. I couldn’t focus on Chase’s moves because every one of my own were being watched. The look of outrage that hit his face when Dad asked me to spar with Chase made my inner cheerleader giggle.

  Chase swung, and I hardly moved in time. The side of his glove skidded close to my face. “Neveah!” Chase yelled, breaking my failing concentration.

  “Sorry,” I put my glove-cladded hands up. “I’m out of it today.”

  Chase frowned. “You are.” He stepped closer, pressing the back of his palm against my forehead. “Are you okay?”

  I jerked away, unable to meet his eyes because he’d know. He knew when I started seeing Cooper. I’d known the guy since we were kids and reading each other had become natural. “I’m fine,” I said. “I just need a break.”

  I turned to face Dad who looked worried. “Nev, maybe you need to take a break. Are you,” he eyed Rage next to me, cupped his hand over his mouth and whispered, “on your period?”

  I narrowed my gaze at him. “No!” I shouted. “I’m not. I’m just—preoccupied today. Can I just—go do some paperwork or something?” Why was I sweating? I knew why. Rage’s glare was on the side of my face. How this man made me so shy, I’d never know. I wasn’t shy.

  Dad shrugged. “Sure. I’ll never say no to paperwork. Rage get in the ring with Chase.”

  My eyes fluttered toward his, and the smile on his face told me he knew exactly why I couldn’t concentrate. Because every swing of my glove or step—I did think of him. The way he’d filled me so tight, the rough touch of his hands.

  Grabbing the rope, he held it down for me, waiting for me to slide over his hands and to the floor. A groan left his throat at our brief closeness before I turned and went to hide under my desk until my panties dried.

  I spent most of the afternoon doing paperwork for my dad. Lucy sat beside me, snoring. It’d taken twenty minutes for my racing hormones to settle down. The gym was closing when I heard the bell ding, and Cooper walked inside. His hair was a wild mess, those blue eyes I’d fallen into so many times were red streaked. “Neveah, do you have a minute?”

  No. Instead of answering, I pointed to the clock. After what Aunt Shelly told me about him wanting me, my skin started to crawl at the sight of him. “Look at me,” he begged.

  Sighing, I glanced up at him. Dark bags hung under each eye, his skin hung looser than before. “What’s wrong with you?”

  “You,” he whispered. “I’ve been trying to think of a way to get your attention. You bailed on me at the dance, and—,” his face turned to stone. “I saw you with him.”

  Fear clogged my throat. I knew who he meant, but I played stupid the best I could. “What are you talkin’ about?”

  His frown deepened, and his fingers tightened on the desk’s edge. “Neveah, I saw you kissing him, and his hands down your pants.”

  Fuck. “I was drunk.”

  “Bullshit,”
he spat. “Neither one of you were drunk.”

  Anger built in my throat. Cooper was not going to fuck this up for me. “So what? We faltered, sue me.”

  “I want you to go out with me,” he said.

  Does he not have any shame? The obvious ‘I’m black-mailing you’ weighed between us. I clutched my fingers on the desk. “No, I don’t want to. I’m not going to. You’re not going to black mail me into a date, Cooper. Get some pride.”

  He laughed bitterly and clutched his Joe’s Boxing Gym T-shirt in his fist. “I’m here because of you. I took your dad’s offer because I’d get to see you when you come home. And now that you’re here—some fucking deadbeat asshole isn’t going to get in my way.” He stood upward. “I’ll tell if you don’t,” he whispered. “I’ll tell your dad. I know he made Declan promise.”

  My hands begun to shake in my lap. Beating his ass come to mind first. I could take him easily. “Cooper, don’t you understand that I don’t want to go with you!”

  “I don’t care!” he shouted. “Give me a chance to show you I’m your guy. I’m the guy that loved you before anyone else did.”

  I clutched my fists against my knees, heaving from the rage inside of me. The door swung opened a few seconds later, but I only watched Cooper’s face transform. Sleazy bastard.

  “Glad you’re here. I need your help with a mat, Cooper,” Dad said.

  Cooper smiled down at me and knocked his knuckles against the desk. “Think about it.”

  When the doors swung shut, my hand went to my mouth. He was going to tell my dad.

  What in the hell am I going to do?

  ***

  Dad stayed late with Cooper at the gym while I cooked supper for us. Rage had stood behind me for ten minutes before he spoke.

  “Are you going to tell me what’s wrong, or do I have to wait for you to talk about it?”