"Um, I was thirteen." she finally murmured.
"Where are your parents?" he asked walking back to the loveseat to sit beside her. Natalie shrugged, not wanting to conjure up her issues that seemed to have carried over to her adulthood. Even with Grandma Lyn and Grandpa Paul's loving and caring household, she still was very much afraid of being abandoned. Maybe that was why she never opened up to Romero. The feeling that this was a temporary fix was always ringing in her head.
"I don't know."
"Natalie?"
"Romero I really don't want to talk about this." She said quickly and stood creating space between them.
"Why not?"
"Maybe because I just lost the last person on earth that was family? I don't know…why not.."
"Natalie, stop being so…so…okay." He relented. "Let's get out of here and take the subway to Manhattan." He finished off his beer and put the can in the recycling bin outside before picking up Orange and scratching his head. "I can't stand cats, but for some reason, I like this one." He murmured. Natalie laughed and went to get her shoes as she followed him out the door. As Natalie and he waited for the bus to go to the nearest subway station, Romero reached in his pocket and took her hand.
"Mami wanted me to give you this." He grinned, placing a ring on her finger.
"No…I can't accept..."
"Nope, she will be looking for it when we come back." He laughed. Natalie twisted her mouth and took a deep breath.
"How long is this going to go on, Romero?" she asked. "We can't pretend forever. Eventually you're going to meet someone you actually want to marry and then what?" Romero stood as the bus neared and helped her up also.
"It won't happen." He said.
"Why not?" Natalie asked, unsure as to why he was so confident. He didn't say anything, just shrugged and passed her card through the slot twice once they got on the bus.
They spent the day in Central Park walking around the expanse of it and sitting down in the various areas, walking around the runner's circle before coming back out at the entrance. Romero took her to dinner before they headed back to the house and both were too tired to even think of what the next day was supposed to bring.
Natalie had enjoyed herself and secretly she was happy Romero was there. She only found more things to like about him as time went on, and this was just one more thing for her to like. He may have been one track minded in the beginning, but he owned up to his faults just as quickly and tried to make up for them.
A soft knock on her bedroom door startled Natalie an hour later as she lay awake, wondering why she couldn't sleep. The truth was, the man downstairs was heavily on her mind and she was wishing all kinds of things at the moment. Natalie stayed silent as she watched Romero enter her bedroom. He was dressed in just an A-line t-shirt and athletic shorts. Even dressed for bed he looked good. Broad shoulders, narrow waist, toned legs, and his dark hair giving him an air of sexiness. For thirty-nine Romero looked as if he could give the average twenty-something a run for his money. Natalie's mouth went dry and she just followed him as he sat on her bed.
"Why aren't you asleep?" he asked. Natalie gave him a pensive smile.
Romero climbed in beside her and lay on his stomach with the pillow bunched underneath his head. Natalie sat up looking at him. Taking a deep breath she knew what he wanted. She just was afraid of what it meant and all it did was scare her. She looked at the ring on her finger, it was the one Rosario had never taken off, yet she wanted her to have it. Romero had given her a simple engagement ring, nothing expensive to keep with appearances, but she'd put it away, feeling she didn't need it except when they were together. Even now, she wished she could take this band off, but like he said, Rosario would be expecting to see it. It was her wedding ring when she married her husband, Avery, and she wanted to pass it down to their son for his wife. Natalie stared at it, yet really wasn't seeing it.
"Those first few years I didn't really understand what was going on with my mother. She was an addict and for years she was able to hide it. Even my grandparents never knew. I found out later she'd started in college. Smoking at first, then it went to cocaine, later heroine. She was like a functioning addict. She dressed pretty, had her hair done, always looked nice and "normal". But at night and on the weekends, she was a different person. When you're young you just learn to stay away from "that" person, because that isn't Mommy.
"It wasn't until I turned twelve when the men started to come around. They were just random guys and luckily they never came at me. Her addiction to heroine had gotten worse and she needed her fix more often. She'd send me out the house and tell me to go to the store or mall for something. Take a bus ride, whatever, just don't come back home for a couple of hours. I'd either go to the library or sit in the park. Go get a slice of pizza and just when it was time for me to get ready for bed, I'd start home. By then, she was happy, cleaned up, and high. Several times I'd come home to an empty house.
"I was embarrassed and sad really, but I loved her. When she left, I thought something had happened to her; instead I had to learn the hard way that sometimes loving someone isn't enough. The neighbors called CPS when they realized I'd been living alone for a couple of weeks. The rent was due and there were eviction notices on the door. I'd never met my Grandparents before then. Can you believe that? She had totally cut them out of her life. I was scared at first, but then Grandpa Paul gave me the biggest hug when he first saw me. Not being surrounded by positive male figures, I was skittish, but he was just soft spoken and just a teddy bear.
"Grandma Lyn , well, she took me to work with her the next day and from there they finished doing what my mother decided it was too hard for her to do anymore. But, I always expected them to abandon me also. It was always in the back of my mind even though it was ridiculous. I couldn't help it." She whispered. "They never did. Instead, they provided something that I think I needed, but they also needed. They missed my mother and felt they'd done something wrong. Why else would she choose a path they'd warned her about taking. I guess I just held on to them so tightly because they were the first ones to ever show me unconditional love." She finished. She was surprised when Romero's thumb brushed her cheek. It came away wet and she wiped at her other eye, a soft laugh escaping. "Sorry, didn't realize I was crying." She sniffed.
"It's okay." He whispered. Natalie felt his eyes on her and looked at him. She was the first to look away, warmth gathering around her body as she became aware of his smell, his heat, and how big his body was as it took up most of her small bed.
Romero's long arm came around her waist and pulled her over toward him. Natalie didn't resist as she curled her head underneath his chin, letting him surround her. The steady beat of his heart lulling.
Romero remained awake as the even sounds of Natalie's breathing filled the room. He'd missed an important part of Natalie not knowing her background and where she'd come from. Yet, she still helped him out. The question remained in the air when he'd asked her a few weeks ago, what was she afraid of. If he'd of known her then he would have had the answer himself. Romero instinctively tightened his hold on her and breathed in the scent of her hair as he kissed the top of her head. That feeling he couldn't quite place when it came to Natalie seemed to get stronger at that moment. Romero felt he'd started this out as just a deal, but it was quickly turning into something else. Something he wasn't sure he wanted or could prevent even if he tried.
12
Natalie felt like she was suffocating and her mind immediately came awake as her lungs fought to bring in air. She tried to turn her head only to have it held down. What the hell? Panic gripped her until her nose came in contact with hair and as she tried to open her eyes, they also seemed glued shut. A muffled sound came out her mouth as cloth filled it instead. She struggled underneath what seemed like dead weight and the inability to move her arms and legs sent her into even a more panicked frenzy until she freed her head from under what was clearly a shoulder. She was took a deep breath and groaned as
she felt the weight of Romero on her. He had not budged, his soft snore was a testament that she could have died and he would not have realized she'd been suffocated by his armpit hair! Frustration, then anger leapt through her, until she just felt exasperated. His thigh had her completely pinned under him. The rest of his torso was covering one of her arms and his other arm had her pinned against him still. He had her cuddled up against him like she was a goddamn stuffed animal! And he felt so damn good her body was reacting like it hadn't been touched by a man in years. Which was true, but damn if she didn't need this tease to make her feel more conflicted.
"ROMERO!!" she screamed. The snoring stopped and he shot up so fast Natalie came with him as he hadn't let go. She was dragged with him, half off the bed the other half still on it.
"What? What? Where am I? What happened? Who did it?" he looked around in a daze, sleep still clouding his eyes. Natalie hung onto his waist for dear life afraid to fall, yet knew it wouldn't be far if she did. She slid her legs off the bed and tried to stand.
"Let me go, dammit!" she growled, Romero looked down at her and released her.
"Shit! Sorry, Nat." he helped her up. When she was standing, he ran a hand over his hair and face.
"That's okay, I just don't take kindly to being suffocated AWAKE!" She yelled. Romero eyes widened as if he was still trying to comprehend what she was talking about. Then realizing what she said, he yawned.
"Hey, I'm no used to sharing a bed." He argued. "Besides, it wasn't my intention to fall asleep, I was thinking, next thing I knew you're screaming your head off." He chuckled. Natalie just remained still trying really hard not to notice he had a tent in his shorts and he didn't care that he might knock something over with it. Mainly her. Clearing her throat, she smoothed down her hair and mumbled something about going to the bathroom and leaving him standing there wondering what happened before hurrying to the downstairs bathroom to relieve himself.
xxxxxx
An hour later, Natalie had coffee ready and Orange's food prepared. She left out the back only to see Romero coming in from the water and a deep groan filled her lungs at seeing him early in the morning again, except now he was half naked. What was he doing to her? From the moment in the elevator he'd had her so aware of him, and not once had he made a pass at her. Natalie was sure she was no longer able to hide her attraction to him.
Closing her eyes, she opened them one at a time as he strolled toward her. Water running down his chest as the hairs laid like a thin blanket over it leading straight into the board shorts where she had a good idea what lay underneath already. She began to walk past him when he stopped her.
"Wait for me, I want to walk with you." Romero said. "Give me a second." Natalie waited while he grabbed the towel that lay over the railing and began to dry off before wrapping it around his neck and urging her to come on. "What are you in such a rush for?"
"I'm not."
"Are you still mad at this morning?" he laughed. "I apologized!" Natalie grunted.
"I'm not mad at this morning. I don't know…" she mumbled and slowed her walk. "Did you have a good swim?"
"Yeah, nice, but the beaches in the South are much better." He made a smacking sound. "The sand is softer, too."
"Well, I don't swim in it, but it's a great visual." She noted.
"Natalie…um…about last night."
"Don't, Romero, I told you what you wanted to know." She said shaking her head.
'I know, I just wanted to let you know that I understand better now. If you want to call this whole thing off, I'd tell Mami the truth." He finished. Natalie wasn't expecting that, nor was she hoping for it. If anything it made her begin to panic.
"But, you…"
"Look, Natalie." He stopped her in mid stride and touched her shoulder until she was looking up at him. Romero could have cursed at the inviting look of her face. This had turned into such a complicated mess, and he was struggling to keep it comfortable for her, but when she looked like that he remembered the kiss and when he remembered the kiss, he got that deep longing in his chest that told him to forget their deal and take this, whatever it was, where ever it would take him. "What happened?" he whispered. Although it was to himself, he'd said it out loud unknowingly.
"What? Romero, you're making no sense." She looked confused.
"Something happened. Somewhere in between it changed. What happened?" He stated in wonderment. Natalie saw the question in his eyes and realized what he was asking.
"I don't know." Her voice was soft, yet sad that he was regretful, if that.
"I do."
"Okay, if you want to call it off then by all means. We can just get an annulment…" Natalie started not wanting to face him or the truth.
"That's not what I'm talking about, Natalie. You and I." He said softly. "You felt it, I know you did. That first time, when we shook hands, when we kissed, and every time in between that we've been together. Last night as I held you in my arms. At least, I noticed it."
"You…I…" she stuttered and averted her eyes from his questioning ones, she focused on the deep cleft in his chin. "Romero, I'll admit I'm attracted to you, what woman wouldn't be. You're a handsome man and even though you have issues, including being a Mama's boy, that's all. It's just something fleeting, it will go away." she laughed uncomfortably.
"Really?" Romero asked. He let his eyes scan the smooth skin of her face, focusing on the swell of her lips before looking into a pair of frightened eyes before they looked away from his. She was scared and he really couldn't blame her, but so was he.
"Yes, really." She licked her lips and finally bought her eyes to meet his.
"I think I'll go and take a shower." He mumbled and turned away from her to go back. Romero was afraid of what he was about to do which was to prove to her that nothing about this was fleeting and attraction wasn't just the beginning. They'd surpassed it and were headed for something much bigger. He just didn't know what to do about it.
Natalie watched him walk back a slight bow in his legs as he looked out onto the water. She imagined his brow wrinkled as he concentrated on whatever was going through that beautiful mind of his. No longer feeling like taking the walk, she followed him.
The sound of the shower running gave her the indication where he was. She thought to call Deann and ask how the store was doing, but decided against it. The sound of Romero's cellular rang and she looked toward the dining room table that was visible through a doorway that led to it and the kitchen. She ignored it even though she was nosey. Fifteen minutes later, Romero came out hair damp, freshly shaved, and denim jeans and tight t-shirt on like he'd been before. He went in the dining room and she could hear him dialing whomever it was back.
"Yes, Mami! Yes...she's fine." He chuckled and his voice got closer then his big body sat beside her as he held the phone to her ear. Natalie took in small breathes at the sensory overload that wafted toward her. Between the soapy clean scent, his aftershave, and whatever else men put on their bodies, she was a second away from attacking him just to feel his big hands on her again. How come she missed this morning.
"Rosario?" she said into the head set.
"Natalie, thank goodness, you are okay."
"Yes, I'm at my house."
"Oh, your house?" she asked. "Romero's?"
"No, the one my grandmother left to me." She supplied.
"Oh, I'm so sorry honey. Did Romero give you something?" she asked.
"Yes, Rosario, it's beautiful, but you know I can't accept it, it's what Avery gave you."
"Nonsense. I wanted to start a tradition and gave it to you so that you can give to you and Romero's son." She could see the wide grin on her face. "Don't stay away to long, Natalie." She said quietly. "You may have lost someone in your family, but remember you have gained two more. Life does not stop, besides, you have to look toward the future. Your grandmother would have wanted you to be happy and have babies. Start your family. If she was there, she'd want that. So don't think that your life is done. It is
n't. It's just beginning." Natalie felt the tears well up in her eyes and she said a quick thank you before handing the phone back to Romero and leaving him on the sofa looking after her.
"Mami, you made her cry!" Romero stated with a roll of his eyes.
"I didn't mean to, she just needs you darling. Go to her. I will not bother you again."
"Where is your nurse?"
"She came, took my vitals and everything is fine. Maria is here and she is keeping me company. So don't' worry." Romero nodded, knowing she couldn't see him.
"I will talk to you later, love you."
"Love you." They hung up and Romero headed up the stairs, he knocked softly on Natalie's door and found her sitting on her bed, twisting the ring he'd given her yesterday. He sat down beside her and without thought wrapped his arms around her shoulders.
"Are you okay?"
"Yes, you're mother just gave me a loving spanking." She laughed, Romero with her. He knew his mother was only being herself.
"Do you think it worked?" he asked, his tone teasing.
"I don't know." She looked over at him. "She's coming from a different place."
"What do you mean?"
"She's coming from the idea that I have you and her and thus I should be looking forward to creating new memories." Romero understood what she was saying.
"You do have me, Natalie." He told her.
"Yeah…".
"No, not "yeah", Yes." They quietly looked at each other, Natalie wishing for something she knew she was never going to get and Romero wanting to give her something he wasn't sure she wanted to receive. Either way, he wasn't going to pass up the opportunity to see. They were already close and Romero dived right in without a second thought, capturing her lips. The gentle coaxing of his mouth, then probing tongue undid Natalie's that last bit of resistance. He sent chills down her spine as he pulled her closer to him; his free hand cradled her face as the other splayed across her back, pushing her against the hardness of his chest.
Finding Mrs. Right Page 8