The covers had fallen down Dante when she moved him, and while he wore boxers to bed, they did nothing to disguise the large erection in his underwear.
“Holy shit,” she whispered.
Phoenix didn’t have a ton of experience with men, but she didn’t live in a bubble. She wasn’t a virgin, and with the Internet, it would have been pretty hard to never see a naked man. Plus, she was a shifter. Modesty and male cats did not go hand in hand.
Dante was freaking huge.
Without even thinking about it, she put her hands between her legs. While she’d had a couple of sexual encounters, the guys had been average and still always caused her pain. She couldn’t imagine something as big as Dante’s penis ever causing anything but agony.
Yet, at the same time, she was strangely curious about what sex with Dante would be like. He was always almost tender with her, even the time when he’d fed from her. He had tried to come off as intimidating, and she admitted that she had been for a moment, but in the end, he hadn’t been rough or forceful with her. Because of this, even with his size, she couldn’t imagine him purposely causing a woman pain. And she knew he had sex. He’d told her so himself, and he’d been pissed at her since she confronted him about needing to feed. She knew it wasn’t something he’d made up because he was so angry at the time. So, how did he make it enjoyable for his partners?
She moved her eyes from his hard-on to over his abdomen and chest. He was muscular and smooth. His hairless torso was so different from all the naked shifters she’d seen, and he had a long scar that started on one shoulder and ended on his opposite hip. He was amazingly gorgeous, and his scar only enhanced his already apparent maleness.
She couldn’t believe she felt this way, but she wanted to run her fingers over it. She slowly moved her hand above him, but right before she touched him, she stopped herself.
What am I thinking? She was crazy. Nothing good would come of this.
Dante would wake up the second her hand met his skin, and then...what? She would awkwardly walk away? She would actually attempt to be intimate with him?
She shook her head at herself. She had learned her lesson more than once already.
No matter how attractive she found Dante and how much of a gentleman she assumed he would be, any sexual contact they had would end the same as all her others. In disappointment. Hers and his. She would be uncomfortable and not enjoy it, and he would be frustrated that she couldn’t get over her past and just relax. Or he would just use her body and not care if she had a good time or not.
She looked at Dante’s face. Nah, he wouldn’t be an asshole like that, but he would be disappointed. And, surprisingly, Phoenix found that she really didn’t want to disappoint Dante. She didn’t want him to be one more guy who thought she was a cold fish in bed.
She slipped out of bed and pulled the covers over him. As she moved to the closet to get dressed, she almost laughed out loud. It was like a fog had lifted, and she could think straight. Had she actually been thinking about having sex with Dante? She snickered. Maybe she really was crazy because she didn’t think about sex ever. Whatever had just happened in bed a minute ago was a fluke. A sleep-induced irrational fluke.
There was no way she’d ever have sex again with anyone. Not even with Dante.
Chapter Fifteen
SAWYER LENNAR—REMEMBERING his last name made him feel good—watched Kenzie take her friend Naya into her arms after the female vampire had burst through the door, making a beeline for the human. The two consoled each other, but surprisingly, it was Naya who cried, and it was Kenzie who reassured her friend.
He tilted his head to the side in amazement. He had thought that the kidnapped victim would have been the more emotional of the two, but Kenzie was strong. After everything she’d been through, she still hadn’t lost her spirit. He almost smiled with pride for her, but he stopped himself just in time.
Sawyer needed to get away from her because his body and mind was a mix of conflicting feelings and desires.
He was grateful that he had regained his memory. The difficult part was that he still remembered everything that had happened before his memory returned.
Everything.
He remembered the way she’d move when he was inside her. The way she would come so hard all over his dick as he made her orgasm over and over. He had known she was experienced in the bedroom, and part of him had always thought of her as a little slutty, but after fucking her, he definitely saw the appeal. She knew what she liked, and she would take it. She wasn’t shy, and she wouldn’t force him to always take the lead.
Just the thought of her riding him to climax was enough to give him a hard-on from hell.
That was what made him immediately shut down his line of thinking. This was Kenzie he was thinking about. Human Kenzie. He needed to forget anything that had happened between them. He needed to forget how his stupid cat had thought she was his mate because he was never going to be mated to a human.
He needed to find a way to purge his mind of her. If only he could have swapped one memory for another. Unfortunately, amnesia didn’t work that way.
Vaughn made his way over to Sawyer. Vaughn had missed the briefing where Sawyer and Kenzie had filled them in on their experience. Vaughn had only shown up when he brought his mate to see Kenzie. He had been speaking to Vance for the last few minutes, presumably to be told what he’d missed, and now, he was approaching Sawyer with his hand held out.
Sawyer put his hand in Vaughn’s, and the other shifter pulled him close for a man hug and a pat on the back.
They pulled apart, but Vaughn didn’t let go of Sawyer’s hand. “I know you didn’t do it on purpose, but you will never know how grateful I am to you and Kenzie for being kidnapped in our place. I can’t imagine what would’ve happened to Naya and the twins if it had been us instead.”
Sawyer opened his mouth. “Vaughn, you really—”
Vaughn yanked Sawyer forward a step. “This is where you say something like, ‘You’re welcome,’ and nothing more.” He raised his brow. “Understand?”
Sawyer couldn’t help but grin. “You’re welcome.”
Vaughn released his hand and nodded. “That’s better.”
“So, I take it everything is good with the exception of Naya worrying about Kenzie?” Sawyer asked as Vaughn turned and stood next to him so that they could both see the females. “The pregnancy is going okay?”
Sawyer had been just as shocked as everyone when he found out that Vaughn had knocked up the beautiful vampire. However, after seeing how happy Vaughn was, Sawyer only wanted the best for the two of them and their future children.
Vaughn cracked a secret smile that previously wouldn’t have bothered Sawyer, but after his time with Kenzie, he couldn’t help but feel somewhat envious.
He shook off the foolish emotion.
“Yes, everything is good,” Vaughn told Sawyer. “Did my dad tell you that we’re having a boy and a girl?”
Sawyer shook his head.
“Naya’s excited.”
Sawyer gave Vaughn a questioning look.
Vaughn laughed, his blue eyes lighting up. “Okay, okay. I’m excited, too.”
“As you should be. You deserve it, man.”
“Thanks.” Vaughn lost his smile and looked at Kenzie, who was going through her things that Naya had brought for her. “You know, you do, too. My dad says that Kenzie did very well out there. She’s a tough chick, for a shifter or human.”
Sawyer held up his hand to stop Vaughn from saying anything else. “I’m fine. I’m exactly where I want to be.” Sawyer decided it would be best to just ignore the Kenzie comment.
Vaughn looked at Sawyer as if he was almost disappointed. It seemed like he was going to say something else, but the front door opened. Vaughn’s younger sister, Payton, walked through the door, her hand held out behind her, obviously clasped in someone else’s.
Sawyer was an only child but had known the Llewelyns since he was little. Vaughn was
the closest thing he had to a brother, and he often thought of Payton as a little sister to him, too. The last time Sawyer had checked, the female shifter had still been single.
Sawyer quickly glanced at Vaughn to see if the sight alarmed him, but he appeared to be as relaxed as ever. Sawyer looked back at the door just in time to see whose hand Payton was holding.
It was a wolf.
“What the hell did I miss?” Sawyer exclaimed.
Saxon watched as Phoenix walked from the Guardians’ compound to his SUV. She had asked him to pick her up and bring her to the Llewelyns’. Saxon couldn’t help feeling concerned for his friend. Normally, she was so independent, but ever since Dante had rescued her from Gerald, she wouldn’t go anywhere by herself. No one had called her on it though. Oh, no, they were all smarter than that. She might not be her typical self, but she was still Phoenix.
Phoenix opened the door and slipped inside.
“Damn, girl. What did you do, bathe in the vampire?” Saxon hadn’t seen her since their last rotation together a couple of nights ago on the hunt to find Gerald. Every time he saw her, she’d increasingly smell like Dante.
“Ha-ha. I’m not surprised since I’ve been staying there.” She turned and grabbed her seat belt, muttering something else under her breath.
Saxon put the vehicle in drive and put his foot on the accelerator. “Can you please repeat what you just said? Because you don’t smell like all the other vampires.” He glanced at her for a moment before turning his eyes back to the road. “What gives?”
Phoenix sighed. “Okay, but this does not leave the car.” She pointed a finger at him. “If you so much as even hint at what I’m about to tell you to someone else, you’ll be singing soprano for the rest of your life.”
He instinctively put his hand over his balls. “Jeez, Phoenix, I think you know me well enough to know that I won’t tell anyone. I’ve kept your past a secret from anyone you don’t want knowing, haven’t I?”
“Yes, but this...” She paused. “It’s different. You’re probably going to laugh at me.”
He smiled. “Well, now, you have to tell me.”
She rolled her eyes. “I’ve kind of been sleeping in Dante’s bed.”
He immediately tensed. “What?”
“I’ve been sleeping in Dante’s bed.”
Saxon sharply turned the wheel to the right, making the tires screech, and they came to a forceful stop.
She grabbed the armrests. “What the hell, Saxon?”
He put the SUV in park before turning in his seat to face her, and she mirrored his actions.
“Why are you sleeping in Dante’s bed? The vampires won’t give you your own room? What has he done to you?” Saxon sniffed the air. “Do you smell so much like him because”—he swallowed—“he’s forcing himself on you?”
He was going to rip the vampire to shreds. Saxon had thought Dante seemed like a good guy, and he had even warned the vampire a little about Phoenix’s past to help him understand that she was special.
“Saxon, oh my God, you have it all wrong. No, Dante is not forcing himself on me. He hasn’t done anything inappropriate to me or with me. Yes, the vampires gave me my own room, but...” She turned her eyes down toward her lap before looking back up at him. She chuckled. “You’re going to think it’s silly.”
“Phoenix, I’m ready to drive back there and kick his ass. I don’t care if he’s been making you watch his daily puppet show. I just want to know that you’re okay.”
“Daily puppet show?” She laughed. “Can you imagine? That would be hilarious.”
“Phoenix,” he growled.
She rolled her eyes again. “I’ve been sleeping in Dante’s bed because I feel safe when I’m with him.” She shrugged her shoulders. “I tried sleeping in the room they gave me, but I tossed and turned.”
He stared at her.
She raised her eyebrows. “You don’t have to look so surprised.”
He hadn’t realized that his feelings were so obvious. “I’m sorry. I just didn’t expect that to be your answer.”
She turned to face forward once more. “I know. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I don’t know why he’s the one who makes me feel safe. A vampire, out of everyone.”
“Do you think you’ll ever come back to the bunkhouse?”
She scoffed. “Of course,” she said with conviction. But the next sentence was not spoken as strongly, “I’m sure that once Gerald is found, I’ll feel better.”
Saxon put his hand on hers. “Phoenix, it’s okay to be a little vulnerable. And you know you can always sleep with me.”
He wasn’t hitting on her. He was telling the truth. It wouldn’t be the first time he’d let her spend the night with him. His relationship with the female shifter was completely platonic. They were more like brother and sister than anything, but Phoenix still had the urge to be close to other shifters, so he’d let her sleep next to him.
“Yeah, and then everyone will think we’re screwing. It’s one thing to do it every once in a while on a night off, but if I stayed in your room every night, everyone would think we were doing it. No, thank you.”
He put his hand on his chest. “Ouch. You wound me.”
She gave him a you’ve-got-to-be-kidding-me look. “Please. You don’t need my affections.”
He smiled at her. “Yeah, you’re right.” He put his hand on hers again. “You’re sure nothing bad has happened?”
“Yes, I’m sure.” She shook him off. “Can we go now, please?”
He studied her for a moment. She seemed to be telling the truth, and he couldn’t smell any lies, but something was off. It took him a couple of more seconds before he realized that she was embarrassed. He was so close to saying something to her because she never got embarrassed, but then he decided to keep his mouth shut. She’d been through enough.
Saxon turned forward and took off once again. “Just remember, you can talk to me about anything.”
She smiled. “I know. Same here.”
“I know.”
“Now, tell me what you know so far about Sawyer.”
Chapter Sixteen
KENZIE PUSHED OPEN her apartment door and stepped over the threshold, but that was where she stopped. She couldn’t seem to go any further.
Almost all the shifters had been grateful for her assistance, but she couldn’t help feeling like an outsider. All she had wanted to do was leave and go to her apartment. She’d missed it.
But now, being back home was...almost surreal.
“Vaughn, honey, can you stay outside in the hall?” Naya said from behind her.
There was a pause, and then Vaughn said, “Sure, baby.”
Naya pushed Kenzie forward.
Right before the door closed, Vaughn said, “Good night, Kenzie. Glad you’re back.”
Kenzie was still too numb to respond.
Naya took Kenzie’s purse off her shoulder and helped her remove her coat. All of Kenzie’s things had still been at Naya and Vaughn’s house where she had been painting the bathroom when she was abducted, except for her phone. Her cell had been with the kidnappers, and the shifters apparently had been able to confiscate it from them. Right after Kenzie and Sawyer had escaped, the shifters had arrived at the house where Kenzie and Sawyer had been held. If she and Sawyer had waited a little longer, the shifters would have rescued them, and they would never have had to escape and take refuge at her brother’s house.
Crabby Abby came around the corner and weaved her way through Kenzie’s legs.
“I think Crabby Abby actually missed you,” Naya said with amazement.
The Crabby in front of Abby was not a fun play on words. The cat liked no one.
Kenzie bent down to pet Crabby Abby, and the feline took off.
“Okay, maybe not,” Naya said with a sigh. “Since I still have a key, Vaughn had some of the guys come here a couple of times to make sure she had enough food and water.”
Kenzie turned to look at her friend. �
��Thanks.”
Naya tilted her head to the side. “Kenzie, it was the least we could do.” Naya put her hand on Kenzie’s elbow and ushered her toward the couch. “Come and sit. Now, I heard your story from Vance, but I want to hear what really happened.”
Kenzie sat. “What do you mean? We told everyone what really happened.”
Naya, who was still standing, put her hands on her hips. “Mackenzie Rae Swanson, I am your best friend, and you had better not lie to me. I know something happened between Sawyer and you.”
Kenzie sat back in her seat and raised her brow. “Did you just full-name me?”
Naya sat next to her. “Yes, yes, I did. I’m going to be a mother soon,” she said, running her hand over her expanding belly. “I figure I have to practice my reprimanding.” Naya turned in her seat and pointed a finger at Kenzie. “Plus, I know you’re not telling me everything. Everyone else might buy that you two smell like one another because you had to pretend to be Vaughn and me, but I know you too well. There is more to the story.”
Kenzie put her head back against the head of the couch and closed her eyes. “We had sex.”
Naya gasped.
“Sawyer was confused with his amnesia. He thought that I was his mate. I tried to resist, but he was so...not Sawyer.”
“Was it good?”
Kenzie snapped her head up, opening her eyes. “Really? Really, Naya? Out of all that, you want to know what Sawyer was like in bed.”
Naya shrugged a shoulder.
“Vaughn has turned you into a sex fiend.”
“Insults will get you nowhere.”
Kenzie couldn’t help but smile. “Okay, fine. He fucked like a god, all right? It was just as good as I had always imagined it would be.”
Naya stared thoughtfully off into space. “Hmm...it must be a shifter thing. They must be born knowing how to please a woman.”
Kenzie smacked Naya on the arm to get her attention. “You really are a sex fiend.”
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