by Nora Cobb
“Hey,” I wave.
“Beautiful day to sit outside,” says Lucas.
“How’s it hanging, free man?”
“And I won’t be doing that again.”
I stare at Lucas, knowing that Troy has said nothing. In fact, Troy is very quiet as he sits down on my left while Lucas sits down on my right.
“Have you said anything to him?” I ask Troy.
Troy shakes his head and won’t look at either of us. He shoves his hands in his sweat jacket; the temperature is going to be in the eighties, but the dew is still on the grass. The construction on the new Page Center is blocking out the sun on the field. That’s going to be a mess, but Cromwell rushed that decision, too.
I sigh. “Natalie missed her period.”
Lucas eyes me hard because I am the messenger. He’s a big boy. He doesn’t need me to tell him what a missed period means.
“When did she tell you this?” he asks.
“Yesterday.”
He’s quiet, and I wonder if he’s seen her since she figured it out.
“Did you know?” He glares at Troy.
Troy glances over and then stares straight ahead again. “We had sex in Tampa. I forgot to use a condom.”
Well, at least he’s taking credit for all of it. If he had blamed Natalie, I’d have nailed him.
“Wait, you two had sex?” asks Lucas.
There’s an expression about being a fly on the wall, and I’m about to become one. I play it smart and just listen to their conversation.
“You knew I liked her.”
“Did you take advantage of her?” asks Lucas.
“No,” snaps Troy, “I didn’t take advantage.
Lucas shakes his head. “I think you did. Did you plan it in Tampa? Did you go out drinking?”
Troy’s face turns red from anger. “I didn’t trick her, and no, we hadn’t been drinking. I want her as much as you do. I told you that.”
“I never thought—”
“She’d give me a chance,” adds Troy. “That she might forgive me for all the shit I’ve done. You know her, Lucas. Montlake tried to tear her down, but it couldn’t because Natalie is better than all of us.”
It’s quiet, but I’m ready to jump up and pull them apart if I have to. At this moment, I’m done with high school. I just want it to be over, not because I hate it, and I’m bored, but because I have adult shit to deal with. I don’t have any more time to spend on being a kid. I haven’t been a kid in years.
“Look,” my tone is stern, “Let’s focus on the issue and save the accusations for when we have the time, which there will never be. Natalie might be pregnant, and we need a plan to take care of her and the baby.”
“Okay, I agree, but still.” Lucas is in disbelief. “I can’t believe that she allowed you to go bareback. Are you sure she wasn’t drunk?”
Troy swears. “I can’t talk to him.”
“You know what happened.” I check my tone, but it’s hard. “He didn’t plan it. She didn’t plan it. It happened. We can’t spin the clock backward. We’ve really got other things to focus on.”
Lucas scoffs. “This is pretty important.”
“Focus on the bigger problem, Lucas,” snaps Troy, “And you can go write about your feelings later in your journal.”
Fuck. Lucas is on his feet, and Troy is in his face. This is not what was supposed to happen, but it was bound to happen. We have agreed to this, but deep down, each one of us thought that Natalie would want us a little more than the others. I thought I would be the special one because I was her first. Yeah, I got in there first, as rude as it might sound. I staked my claim, and what happened? Lucas charmed her with his feely-feely emotions. And Troy, that fucker, with his cocky attitude. Why do women fall for assholes?
I want to marry the girl, but I don’t know where I stand with these two around. I’m almost tempted to let them go at it so they can take the one other out.
“You got a problem with me?” shouts Troy. “What is it? Am I not as good as you and your superior attitude?”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” shouts Lucas. “I asked a reasonable question. You have a reputation for using drugs and alcohol to persuade women.”
“You wanna know what I used? Pizza,” shouts Troy. “You have to pay for fancy dinners, but all I had to do was order takeout.”
I laugh, which isn’t wise because then they spot the fly on the wall.
“You think this is funny?” counters Lucas. “You’re the big man, the jock, you think it’s okay that he slipped in there?”
I shake my head. I want to tell Lucas what Natalie said. Or at least, what I heard. She didn’t want to tell him because she thinks he can’t handle it. I want to say to him that he’s soft.
“She didn’t tell you first,” I tell him, “because you just got rid of Arielle. She’s probably going to talk to you today.”
It takes a little bit of anger out of him. But Troy is rocking back and forth on his feet. He’s itching to punch, and looking at him, I wouldn’t mind breaking the pretty-boy nose.
“You know what?” I hold up my hands in surrender. “I was wrong. We do need to talk about how we really feel about this. Can we share a woman? Natalie needs us, but do we need each other?”
I hadn’t thought of it until now. My life is taking a free fall without a safety net. What happens when I hit rock bottom? Will there be anyone to help me up? Sure, I have my mother, but I can’t even tell her the truth about the baby. I can always tell Lucas and Troy the truth.
“Look.” I stand tall. “I know how I feel about Natalie, and I know how I feel about the two of you. Troy, you can be a dick, but when I hit bottom, you didn’t stand over me and gloat. You offered me a hand up by offering me a job with your dad. Sometimes, you piss me off, but most of the time, I want you around.
“And Lucas, when I saw you on the beach in your suit with your styled hair, I was like, why do I hang out with this guy? But I know why I hang out with you. It’s because I can tell you anything and you won’t judge me. In fact, you’ll figure out a way to help. It’s a comfort to know you’ve got my back.”
Lucas cracks a smile, and the tension drifts away like a cloud over our heads. “Okay, well,” he starts, “sometimes I don’t get you, Jacob. I mean, you act like a shaved ape in khakis, but you’re the strong one. I know that if I’m facing something terrible, you’ll be behind me and not running away. The whole time I was dealing with my dad, I’d think to myself, Jacob would tell this asshole off, and then I did it. Thinking about you makes me stronger.
“And Troy,” he continues, “Yeah, some of the shit you’ve done is despicable, but you’re loyal. Once you’ve decided that someone is okay, you don’t change your mind. Most people once they pass judgment, it’s done, but I’ve seen you have mercy on those you think deserve it. Even people you’ve had a bad history with. And you are really good to your nutty sister.”
Troy laughs. “Okay, then ditto.” He points at us.
Lucas shakes his head. “Oh, you are lame. I take it all back.”
“I’m joking,” Troy smiles. “All this love-fest is giving me a hard-on. Okay, Jacob, I agree with Lucas. There have been times where I thought I should invest in a Taser if I continued to hang out with you. But you’re the bravest person I know. I offered you a job with my dad, knowing that you wouldn’t take it. But I didn’t want you to worry. I want you to succeed, and I expect to see you make it because you are a brave motherfucker.
“And Lucas, all the girls love you, and sometimes it makes me jealous.”
“Of me?” Lucas scoffs, “You’re the All-American.”
“Yeah,” Troy continues, “but you have style and charisma. You could sell condoms to a eunuch. You have this way with people that I can’t figure out. I’ve never known anyone as solidly likable as you. If I had your people skills, I could rule the world, or Washington, DC, at least. You see possibilities that I’m completely blind to. You understood Natalie before either
of us did.”
Exhausted by our group confession, we sit down again on the bench.
“So, we’re together on this?” I ask.
The three of us decide to stick together. We’ll form our own team, and Natalie will be our captain. The hard feelings that had been brewing disappear as the first chime sounds across the campus.
We walk away better friends than before, except I say nothing about the ring in my pocket.
CHAPTER 9
NATALIE
It’s the first Saturday in June, and the prom is tonight. We girls meet at Cora’s house to dress. Cora looks beautiful in pale green satin with a full skirt while Lexi wears a column of black sequins. Lexi was a little miffed that Cora selected a custom-made dress by Vera Wang to wear to prom and not one designed by Lexi’s mother. Beth eagerly offered to wear Cora’s cast-off while I picked a dress I saw online.
A professional photographer has been hired along with a hairstylist, makeup artist, and seamstress. All of them are at our disposal. Mrs. Bouchard wants pictures of Cora in her dress, and not taken with a phone. The photograph of Cora is for an oil portrait that will hang in the hallway when it’s completed.
“Will they paint you with Mancuso?” Beth asks.
Cora smiles. “Of course. Nicholas will be my husband.”
“Will he live here with you?” I ask.
Cora shakes her head. “Not immediately. We’re buying a house in Los Angeles near UCLA.”
“I thought he was going to Bucknell,” I ask.
Cora touches her auburn waves, pushing them in place. “We decided that UCLA would be better.”
Beth and I exchange a glance. Mancuso is loaded wealthy, but he’s a down-to-earth guy. He is new money that is freshly printed while Cora is old money from when people were exchanging rocks for currency. I’d love to know what her parents think about him, but I don’t dare ask.
“Cora.” Her brother Connor opens the door wide and walks in without knocking.
“Connor, you brat, knock!” shouts Cora.
His gaze is stuck on Beth’s curves as she turns away and tugs on the zipper of her dress. The seamstress steps in front of Beth and blocks Connor’s lurid gaze.
“Connor!” shouts Cora. “You are a filthy troll.”
“There’s a man in here.” Connor points to the hairstylist. Roland is straight, but he’s too busy working to peep.
“Roland is paid to be in here,” replies Cora, “His job is working backstage at the fashion shows.”
Roland has seen plenty of tits and ass during Fashion Week, and he looks a little bored. To emphasize the point, he yawns.
Cora chases Connor back to the door. He holds up his hands as he almost trips on his huge sneakers. “Mom told me to tell you the photograph is setting up outside by the gazebo,” he wails.
Cora points a sharp red nail. “You better not come in here again.”
“When you move out,” he smirks, “I’m taking your room.”
“I’m bolting it shut!” Cora shoves a laughing Connor out and slams the door shut.
“What a brat,” whispers Lexi.
Cora sits on the sofa beside Lexi, who dutifully fans her with a hand towel. It’s hilarious, but Cora should’ve been the queen of Montlake. She knows how to carry herself, and she definitely has her shit together. Cora would never get pregnant before graduation.
***
I watch the other girls fussing with their hair and makeup as if I’m watching a video. I feel distant from everything going on around me. I haven’t told Beth about the pregnancy scare, and I have an appointment with Hannah’s doctor. The waitlist was three months, but when I dropped Hannah Fleming’s name, the wait narrowed down to next week.
Beth sits beside me, looking super cute in a red bustier dress that grazes the floor. Cora decided to have a Monte Carlo themed prom with a casino set-up for Montlake scholarships. Instead of real money, everyone will have fun bucks given to them by their parents. And alcohol is forbidden. I’m sure some naughtiness will happen, but not for me. I’m feeling nauseous, and I hope it isn’t the baby.
“Why are you looking like blah?” asks Beth. “You’re too cute to look like shit. Love the dress, by the way.”
“Cora,” Mrs. Bouchard stands by the bedroom door, and our spines straighten on command. I don’t know why Cora’s mother’s cool gaze makes us react in that way, but it does. She steps into the room.
“May I see your dresses?” It’s her polite way of telling us to model them so she can decide if we’ll be in the photo.
Beth prances over with the biggest smile on her face and curtsies. I try not to shake my head at her silliness. I met Beth’s mom once, and she is a totally middle-class boho. No matter how much money is in the bank. If she saw Beth acting like this, she’d laugh her ass off. Or stand up straight like her daughter. Mrs. Bouchard is intimidating.
Mrs. Bouchard looks at the tight satin squeezing Beth’s breasts to her chin, and frowns. “It’s the style, isn’t it?” she says.
“Too much?” asks Beth.
“Less makeup, and it might look tasteful. You need another focal point.”
Beth dips her head shyly. “Could I take lessons from you, Mrs. Bouchard?”
Mrs. Bouchard laughs but not unkindly. “Come by Saturday, and we’ll start on table etiquette.”
I walk over and model my dress. It’s not as sexy as Beth’s. It’s a simple white gown with a portrait neckline edged in pearls. I guess I’m feeling maternal, so I covered up my breasts.
Mrs. Bouchard smiles and pats my hair with her hand. “My hair was your color when I was young.” She motions toward the hairstylist. “Roland, I’d like Natalie’s hair in a chignon with baby’s breath. You look like a bride, my dear.”
It takes an amazing amount of energy not to sob.
Cora and Lexi go downstairs first, for pictures of the bride with her maid of honor. And then later, a picture of the four of us together before we ride off in the limo. Cora and Lexi rush out of the room behind Cora’s mother, while Beth is floating above the clouds when she sits beside me. The seamstress has made the dress a little less rock and roll and a bit more town and country.
“I didn’t know you wanted to be a lady,” I smile weakly at Beth.
“I want to know how to be one,” she explains, pulling on her heels, “and then I have the option of being one or not. You know, like how some people talk with an accent and then switch it off. I want to be able to be classy or not.”
She frowns at me closely, sensing that something is very wrong. Again.
“You’re going to your prom,” she says, “not an execution.”
I sigh, slumping in my pretty dress. “I might be pregnant.”
Beth clutches her cleavage and starts to cough.
“Drop a bomb,” she gasps.
The makeup artist looks over, but we stare back with blank, innocent faces. She looks away. Beth gets up, and I follow her into the bathroom.
“Fuck, what? How? I mean, I know how. But when?” she asks.
“Tampa,” I reply. “I wasn’t on the pill yet, and I forgot the condom. I’m going to the doctor, but he’s busy and thorough. I’ll have to wait for the results.”
“No wonder you look a mess. A beautiful mess, but you look like you’re headed for a meltdown.”
I dab my eyes with a tissue crushed in my hand. “I don’t know if I’m crying because I’m upset or because it’s hormones.”
“Why wait for a doctor?” she asks. “Go to the drugstore and get a pee stick. Hell, you can order it online. Well, then it will be in your history forever. Do you want me to go with you?”
“I’m afraid to find out.” My hands start to tremble. “I’m scared that if I am, it will change everything. I’m not ready for this.”
Beth holds my hands. “Natalie, I know you’re scared, but you have to find out.” Beth’s mouth drops. “Wait, you were in Tampa with Troy.”
I nod. “I’m dating all three of them now.”
Beth’s head swings around her shoulders in a circle, and for a moment, she looks as if she’ll faint. Beth blinks her eyes. “Okay, I’m back. What are you going to do?”
“I’m not sure what a baby will mean. I mean, my relationship is unconventional as it is, and now, there’s a baby in the mix. I was just getting close to Troy, and Lucas is free again.”
I sit down on the closed toilet lid, and my face heats up as I hold back tears. I wish for some way to make things somewhat normal. I need to be sure that everything will be okay for the baby and me.