by Brook Greene
She stirs under me, and I feel her arms come up around me. “Hey, baby.” Her eyes flutter open, her voice thick with sleep. I had left the bathroom light on so she’s cast in a dim shadow, but enough light I can see her features.
“Hey, beautiful.” I kiss her nose. No matter how many days pass, I will never be able to kiss this woman enough. “How do you feel?”
She smiles. “Blissfully sore.” She smoothes her bare leg up my side, and I feel myself getting hard again as she rocks her hips up into me.
“Babe.” I have my doubts that she’ll be able to handle me after what I put her through earlier. “I don’t think you can,” I say, rubbing my dick through her already wet folds. “But damn, if you don’t get so wet for me.”
“Let me be the judge of that,” she whispers, rubbing up into me again.
How the hell could I turn her down when I’m gonna be away from her for at least three days? I push up off her and reach for my jeans. As I do this, she moves off me and I hear the soft sounds of music playing from a small speaker behind me. I turn to her, and she is smiling sweetly. “I’ve always wanted to do it to music.” The soft sounds of the song are familiar to me, but I can’t place it.
I grab her ass and pull her body back down the bed, but I’m just not feeling the song so I reach for her phone. “Hey.” I stop her from talking it by covering her mouth with my hand, that she promptly slaps away. “Don’t do that,” she scolds, but smiles at me.
“Just let me.” I thumb through her playlist. “Oh, shit yeah,” I say when I find a song. Selecting play, I lay the phone back down and listen to the low soulful opening cords of a deep guitar starting the first bars of “Tennessee Whiskey” by Chris Stapleton.
She lays down and I settle myself back over her after putting the condom on. I dip my head to her ear when the first lyrics of the song starts and I sing them to her. She stills under me, and I push into her tight pussy, feeling a shudder roll down my body, making us both moan. I continue to sing to her as I make love to her, slowly and softly this time. Taking the time to drink in the feel of her around me. She’s drifting her fingers gently up and down my back as she wraps her legs around my ass.
I take her hands, threading my fingers through hers to raise them above our heads, pushing them into the pillow. I lay the whole weight of my body on hers. “Shit, Tessa, you feel amazing.” I moan into her ear.
“Y—You too,” she pants as I roll my hips, letting my pubic bone rub against her clit. “There…right there,” she gasps as I pass over it then rub back, she lifts her hips to help pull an orgasm from her. “Fuck me, Matthew.” She bucks furiously against me, then screams and I slam into her and feel her pussy grip my cock like a vise. “Sing to me more, Matthew,” she begs, breathless.
I continue to whisper the lyrics into her ear as I draw the inevitable out for as long as I can. But the pleasure of being in her, with her, and owning her has me speeding up the pace right before I blow. I push so hard up into her, she screams again. No doubt from the residual pain I’d caused her this afternoon.
I quickly push up off of her and look down. “Shit, Tessa, did I hurt you again?” I search her face, worried I’ve pushed her too far, even though she said it was okay.
“No.” She smiles a lazy, satisfied smile, her eyes hooded with pleasure. “I came again with you when you did,” she mumbles, her words all strung together. I smile down at her and take in her beautiful face, committing it to memory. This woman has been in my life for three days, and now I’m leaving her for just as many and I’m already dreading it.
I get up to dispose of the condom in the darkened bathroom, then go back to her as quickly as I can. She’s restarted the song and snuggles in against me. “We have to eat sometime tonight.” My stomach growls right on cue.
“I could stand to miss a few meals, and as long as you’re naked beside me in bed, I don’t think I’ll need any food.”
I raise my head and look down at her. “What do you mean, miss a few meals?”
“My ass is huge,” she mumbles against me.
“No, babe.” I reach around, taking her sweet ass in my big hand. “Your ass is fucking perfect.”
“Well I’m glad you think so.”
“I do, and that’s all that matters.” I feel her nod. “You nap and I’ll order some delivery.” I kiss her before I leave the bed and hunt for my jeans. She’s asleep before I even leave the room.
~~~~~~
I search her kitchen for something to carry all the Chinese food I ordered up on so we can picnic naked in the bed. I find a large bread pan under the stove and pile all the little white boxes on, along with two tumblers full of ice and the bottle of Gentleman Jack I found in her cabinet. I stop and smile—my whiskey girl.
I push the door open with my toe and find her curled in a ball, fast asleep. I sit the tray at the foot of the bed, then place a knee down. Crawling up to her, I wake her for the second time tonight. “Baby, the food’s here.” She takes in a deep breath, the delicious smells of the food filling the air around us.
“How did you know that’s my favorite?” she asks, sitting up and rubbing the sleep from her eyes with the backs of her hands. Her breasts are bare and on perfect display for me.
“It was the menu on top of all the others, and the one with the most stains,” I tease as I push my jeans off.
She smiles at me, her eyes on my body burning with just as much hunger as mine when I look at her. “We need to eat, so stop eye fucking me.” I take the tray, placing it on the bed between us. “But only while we eat, then you can fuck me some more.” I smile at her, wiggling my eyebrows. She blushes and lowers her head.
I point to the speaker with my chopsticks. “I see you like the song.”
She smiles. “You sang it to me. It will always be one of my favorites.”
“Good, because it’s one of my all-time favorites, I just needed someone to sing it to.” I shove a bite of rice into my mouth. She blushes even harder. I can’t resist, so I lean over and kiss her heated cheek.
~~~~~~
Matty
After another round of amazing sex, we’d passed back out. Now I’m awake again, looking at the clock. It’s five in the morning, and I’m going to have to get on the road. Her smile and body had pushed away the dread for a little while, but now it’s back, and the things I’m going to have to do are haunting me.
I pull her into my side once more before I rouse her again. “Baby,” I whisper, gliding my lips across her hair. “Babe, I need for you to wake up for me.”
“Not again, Matthew. I’m tired,” she moans.
I laugh. “Not for that, sweets, but I do need for you to wake up for a minute, okay?”
I rub my thumb over her cheek and she stirs a little, but not enough for what I have to tell her. She’s so fucking beautiful and good, and something I don’t deserve after the life I’ve led or the way I’ve treated women. But here I am, unable to leave her side, and not willing to leave her alone.
“Tessa, baby.” This time I’m a little more forceful. “Wake up for me.” I shake her a little bit too.
“It’s early,” she whines.
“I know, baby, but I need you awake.” Finally, after a few more nudges from me, she rolls and props her head on her hand. She stifles a yawn with her hand and blinks her eyes a few times before opening them fully and looking at me.
“What is it?” She trails her finger down my jaw and I close my eyes at her touch.
“I’ve got to be out of town for a few days.” This wakes her right up and she sits up, pulling the sheet around her body. I can see the distress in her eyes. “Not for the reasons you think. I’m not running away from you, I’ve got somethings I need to do for the club.” I’m not exactly lying to her, but I’m not telling her the fucking truth either. I can’t.
“What kind of things?” she asks, still a bit hesitant about my explanation.
“Can’t tell you that, babe. It’s club business, but I’ll be back in about
three days,” I pull her onto my lap, “to continue this.” I grab her ass with both hands and squeeze it, making her squeal.
“When do you have to leave?” She props her elbows on my shoulders.
“Right now, in a few minutes. I’ve gotta go home and pack a few things then hit the road.” Her face falls and she pushes her lips out into a pout.
“Oh, well...” She looks around, unsure.
“Hey,” I say, bringing her eyes back to mine. “This is going to happen from time to time if we continue this. Don’t think every time I leave I want to, because I would love to spend every night in this bed with you until you kick me out. But I have a responsibility to my club and my brothers, things I’m gonna do that I can’t tell you about or give you explanations for.”
She chews on her bottom lip and I lift my thumb, pulling it from her teeth and running the pad over it. She puckers up and kisses it. “Can you tell me where you’re going at least?”
I shake my head no. “Sorry, babe, can’t do that either.”
“Why?”
“Plausible deniability,” I answer quickly.
“What?”
I pat her hips, smiling. “If you don’t know, you can’t be compelled to tell.”
“Like, by the law or something?” Her eyes widen and her eyebrows knit together over the bridge of her nose.
I shrug. “Or something.” Little does she know, she’d never have to worry about the law.
She purses her lips, deep in thought. She stays quiet for a minute, then asks, “What exactly are you in to, Matthew? Or can you not tell me that either?”
“I can’t, but it’s not what you’re thinking. We don’t deal drugs, run guns, or peddle pussy. So get all the thoughts you have from watching movies and TV out of your head. Just know it will never blow back on you, I’ll make sure of that.”
She draws in a deep breath, and I’m worried I’ve told her too much. “I’ll understand if you don’t want me to come back to you. It’s a lot to ask of you when you don’t even know me,” I say, trying not to let her see my disappointment.
“So this is what the others go through all the time too?” She asks and I feel my spirit lift a little. She’s still asking questions and not telling me to get out of her house and leave her alone.
“Yes, for years. So if you ever need anything when I’m not around, call one of the women. They can help you find your way through all the unknowns.” I let her know this so maybe she won’t feel so alone in the times that I’m gone.
“Okay…for now,” she adds the last part in a mumble.
“As long as I get you, I’ll take what I can get,” I say as I squeeze her hips. “Sorry, babe, but I gotta get going.” I don’t move, even though I need to get up and out of here to do the shit I’ve resisted doing for years. “And if Angela gives you any more shit at work,” I hand her one of our generic flip phones. “Call Eno, his and all the other’s numbers are programmed in this. He’ll take care of it.”
“Okay,” she says as she slides off my lap and back onto her side of the bed.
I reluctantly get out of the bed and dress feeling the weight of her stare on me the whole time. I turn to see resignation on her face and the fact her eyes are a little glassy.
I crawl across the bed to her, getting in her face. “Wait for me?” I ask, not moving until she tells me what I want to hear. Even if she told me to leave and not come back, I don’t think I could ever stay away. I would do anything within my power to get her back.
She lays her soft hand on my cheek. “Always.”
I tear myself away from her and leave her naked in a bed I’ve had more fun in, in the past three days than I ever had in the one at the clubhouse. Getting on my bike my phone vibrates in my pocket. Taking it out I don’t have to look to see who it is.
“Yeah,” I answer.
“It’s a go, brother,” he tells me.
“I’ll be there in two hours. Stay on him and call me if anything changes.” I end the call, tucking the phone back into the inside of my vest pocket. Looking back up at Tessa’s bedroom window one more time, I find her looking down at me. I give her a wave before starting my bike and pull out of her driveway.
Chapter Sixteen
Tessa
I wasn’t able to fall back to sleep after Matthew left, but I did snag his pillow and bury my face in it, taking in his scent. I roll to my side, taking the pillow with me and smile at the slight sting I’ve got going on between my legs. I lay with my knees pressed together, calling forth the tingles, thoughts, and memories Matthew had left me with this morning.
I roll to look at the clock and see it’s six thirty, time for me to get up and get ready for work. I groan as I roll to my back and sit up in the bed, throwing my legs over the side. I push from the bed and stop as I feel a warm liquid ooze down my inner thigh. My mouth falls open as I look down to see the milky white liquid slide down my skin.
Oh shit, oh shit, oh motherfucking shit!
I reach down and run my hand up the trail it had left. Wiping it from my skin, I hold my hand up in front of my face. “Oh fuck!” Feeling the panic slam into me. I do the math, counting the days, trying to figure out where I’m at in my cycle, but who the hell am I kidding? I never understood that shit. I’ve been on birth control since I was sixteen, but had a stupid moment and went off the pill when I had moved here.
I slump back down on the bed, staring off into space.
At some point during the three times we’d had sex last night, the condom broke. He never once seemed concerned, so he obviously didn’t know. A sickness comes over me unlike any other I’ve ever felt before. I leap from the bed and run to the bathroom. Falling to my knees, I throw my guts up into the commode.
~~~~~~
I had stumbled through getting ready for work this morning, and now I’m reluctantly climbing the steps to the courthouse, dreading having to spend the day in the office with Angela.
I have the phone with Eno’s number in it with me, and have every intention of using it if the bitch steps to me, but not before I get my two cents in on the woman. I’m not in the mood for her today, and I’m sure if she opens her mouth and breathes one word about Matthew, I will lose my shit on her.
I take in a deep breath before I walk into the office, but find her desk vacant, and let out the breath I was holding. I sit down and boot up my computer on autopilot. Now that Angela is no longer a worry today, the milky substance is a big one.
It’s a good thing my job is mindless and requires little to no part of my brain to do. I’ve gone over so many scenarios of how this could play out, but in the end I settled on taking things one day at a time. I could just be making this a big deal and when I start, I’ll laugh at how stupid I’ve been.
The end of the day couldn’t get here fast enough when I figured out what to do. Matthews’s words had given me the idea.
I rush into the emergency room to find Avery standing at the nurse’s station in a set of pink scrubs. Her eyes widen when she sees me. “Oh my God, Tessa, is everything okay?” she asks, taking me by my upper arms, looking me up and down.
“Yes, everything’s okay,” I assure her. I look around, then back to her. “I hate to bother you, but can I talk to you in private?” Avery looks at me, confused.
“Sure.” She takes my arm, leading me off down the busy hall into a small room with a few couches lining the wall, and boxes of tissues sitting on the small tables between them.
~~~~~~
I sit on the exam table looking at Avery, waiting for her to speak. “Okay, when was your last period?” She takes a calculator from a drawer.
I have to sit and think since I haven’t been having sex and didn’t need the pill. I haven’t been keeping up with them. I just always knew when I was going to start when I started to feel like shit.
“Two weeks ago, maybe? Two and a half?” I look at her and my heart skips when I see her lower her calculator. “What?”
She takes a deep breath and steps ove
r to me, laying her hand on my leg. “Ovulation happens around fourteen days after the first day of your period.”
A lump forms in my throat. “If my memory serves correctly, I would have ovulated this weekend?” She nods. I cover my face with my hands and the tears I’ve been holding onto all day break loose. “Oh God, no.”
She rubs my knee. “Getting pregnant is a shot in the dark by a blind man, literally, Tessa.”
I look and bat my eyes, trying to clear my blurred vision. “So you and Leo were trying to get pregnant?”
“No, but like the two dumbasses we are, we didn’t use anything, ever. You and Matty did. It’s just the one time the condom broke?”
I nod yes, but don’t feel any better about the situation. “Can I take a pregnancy test?”
“Not right now, you have to wait a while. But…” she starts, and a painful expression comes over her face, “you can take the morning after pill just to be safe if you want. It’s up to you.” I can tell she doesn’t want me to have this information, and it’s killing her to give me the option. But it is my choice, isn’t it? Matthew uses condoms religiously, so he doesn’t want kids.
I duck my face again and let a few more tears slip from my eyes. I’m so confused. I don’t want him to think I did this to trap him, but what would he think if I took the pill and discarded a baby he knew nothing about?
“You have up to five days to make the decision to take the pill. Go home, think about, and if you feel like it, tell Matty. Discuss it with him.” She looks back at the door, then back to me, her lips drawn out in a thin line. “Listen, you don’t know me and I don’t know you, but I know Matty, and I think he would want to know.”
I’m not at a place in my life to be a mother—I don’t think I ever will be. It’s not that I had bad parents, because I had awesome parents. It’s me and the life I’ve led, and who could come back into it at any time.
“Tessa?” Her soft voice breaks through my tears and thoughts.