by Starr West
“Hi, Phoenix,” I said without turning; both women looked at me. They didn’t say a word; their expressions didn’t change, nothing, they just looked. “What! Don’t I have the right to know? You make comments without explanation. You start sentences you don’t finish. What am I supposed to think? I’m not a child anymore, but I can’t figure this out while you keep so many secrets.” I shrugged Phoenix’s hand off my shoulder, turned, and ran into the house… like a child. I should have drunk more tea.
They didn’t follow and I was glad. I didn’t get angry often, but today I had a reason and I had to get some answers. I walked to the shelves that held Libby’s books. Some were recently published, others were older and some looked ancient. A few leather volumes seemed to contain answers about something… but the gold-embossed lettering that ran down the spines were rubbed, faded and unreadable. I could spend all day deciding which book was best suited to my quest, but I didn’t have all day. I wanted answers and I wanted them now.
What were they talking about? Ancient magick… beasts with mysterious origins… a prophecy… they spoke in riddles and half facts, I couldn’t decide where to start.
I spied a small paperback Beasts from Myth and Legend. That’s fairly straight forward, I thought as I removed the book from the shelf. It didn’t look as old as some of the others and I wondered if I had chosen well. I flicked through the yellowing pages to catch a glimpse of something relevant.
“… there is some evidence that the beasts from myth and legend, found between the pages of fiction are, in fact, real… what happened to these beasts is unknown. Many theories prevail but few, if any, are based in fact...”
This book didn’t appear to hold any evidence; the author was talking about storybooks. I flicked over a few more pages.
“… dog-like creature with thick, wiry, black fur and blood red eyes are distinguishing features. Some eyewitness accounts estimate the animal to stand as tall as a man, while others say it’s only half that height…
“… fiction writers often refer to it as the hellhound, but it is more than that. The beast both possesses magick and is able to be possessed by magick…What is certain is that a ‘hellhound’ is seldom seen unless called… able to do the bidding of its master… Reports date back to the sixth century, when witches were seen to ride upon their backs or lead packs of beasts on darkened nights.
“… Fortunately, if the legends are correct, it is another of the creatures trapped behind the veil or in some other place, not within our own dimension.”
Did this creature actually exist? The author didn’t offer any proof, but it did fit the description. The crazy question was why this hellhound was after me? And who was its master?
I tossed the book on the table and scanned the shelves for more. Another book caught my eye Earth’s Energy and the Veil that Protects Us. This book was much older, the cover worn, the pages yellow and the print very small. The type of book I would normally avoid, although I needed to read it, I doubted it would make good bedtime reading. As I reached to place the book back on the shelves, it fell to the floor and opened to a page titled “When a loved one dies.”
“When people die, they move beyond the veil. In a way, it’s as if they walk into the next room. They stay near those whom they loved while on earth. Most souls understand what has happened to them when they die, but some don’t. Guides, guardian angels and family members wait on the other side to explain the process and greet the newly arrived spirits. They haven’t crossed over yet; they need time to accept what has happened… These spirits are still attached to their human life, the emotions and the physical possessions of humanity. They need time to deal with death and detach… Initially they may have cravings and needs, as if they were still human. These desires are strong and there is nothing that will satisfy them.
“Some spirits find they are eager to cross over, while others are quite reluctant. There are others still who don’t understand or realise they are dead. They ignore their guides and can’t comprehend why family and friends are ignoring them - they just don’t get it. This usually happens either because they are extremely attached to their humanity or because their death was sudden and/or tragic. These spirits, lost between two worlds, see people more easily and communicate with a medium better than their own guides.
“Once a spirit crosses over, they are able to heal, to remove themselves from the attachments of life and understand the reason and purpose for their lives. They never lose the connection to those they love and many spend time assisting their earth families. There are rules though, and these must be adhered to….”
I tried to absorb what I had just read; I never thought much about death before Mum died. It simply wasn’t an issue. Now here were some answers, answers to questions that had haunted me for months. I remembered Libby saying that Mum was with us, but I didn’t listen. At the time, I thought she was just patronizing me, trying to pacify me by saying what she thought I wanted to hear.
I turned the pages and looked for more. I wanted to believe this writer. It was crazy, but I trusted books, and I wanted what she said to be true, but I had to know more. I flicked over a few pages.
“…there was a time when magick was available to all humanity and people only used it for good. This ancient magick was used to heal the sick, grow crops, and work with nature…
“They didn’t realise they had a choice, but the people had been given free will… Over time, they discovered that magick had two sides - dark and light. The dark magick didn’t automatically mean that it was evil magick; it was just a balance, like night and day.
“It was the desire in men’s hearts that created evil… It was the intention that caused evil, not merely the presence of darkness, but the intention behind the magick. This was a choice made by mankind.
“…evil grew to a point where a few possessed all the power and humanity was almost extinguished. Darkness without light…
“Naturally, animals possessed more magick than people and this caused a new type of jealousy … magickal creatures were slaughtered to capture their magick or manipulated to carry out the wishes of a master…some became creatures of the night, evil beasts unable…
“The creatures could only exist on earth if the magick remained… the magickal creatures needed the light while the beasts needed the darkness…
“A veil was necessary to protect humanity… trapping the ancient dark magick would require capturing all the magick, thus leaving humans without a connection to the earth and without access to magick…
“There were many disadvantages. The creation of the veil meant that entering souls would pass through it and lose their connection to the creator thereby forgetting their origins.
“Despite knowing the problems the veil would produce, there was no choice - the veil had to be created…
“In time, it became obvious that this created a time of great darkness. Without magick, there was no connection and little reason to live. There was no dark magick but there was also no light… so the veil was modified, allowing some of the magick to filter through, just enough to give hope back to humanity. It was not enough, however, to enable one to abuse with dark magick, or so it was hoped. It wasn’t obvious at first and no one knew that a new energy existed on earth. Some still had memories of the time before the veil and told stories about a magick that once existed.
“The filter had created an imperfect system, one that let in both the light and the dark, but much less than had originally been available. Without knowing it, the people were again able to embrace both kinds of magick. Their choices led them one way or the other, but a balance was eventually achieved, where light and dark coexisted equally. As long as a balance remained, the veil remained strong and intact. If the balance became unstable, the veil would begin to weaken and flaws would appear.”
I turned a page or two and found the final chapter.
“A time is coming when the veil will fail. It is unknown what the result will be but one can expect
…”
I looked up and saw three pairs of eyes looking down at me. I didn’t know how long they had been watching, nor did I care. If this were the truth, why did they keep it a secret?
I questioned the trio, “Is this true?”
Libby shrugged, “It depends what you read, but most likely, yes, I would say it’s true.” Libby took the book and scanned the page. Phoenix sat, and Tahinah boiled the kettle.
Libby spoke first, “We weren’t keeping secrets. Everything happened so fast; there was no time to tell you.”
“And,” Phoenix continued, “you didn’t even believe in magick a few days ago. What would you have thought if we started telling you about the veil and the possibility of monsters?” He actually made sense.
“That’s beside the point,” I said. I wasn’t about to let them get away with this so easily. “You should have told me something. If, for whatever reason, I am the cause of this, then I should leave. I won’t put everyone here in danger because of me.”
“Where would you go, Psyche? There is nowhere to go.” Phoenix spoke softly as if the truth of what I said was something he had already considered.
“No, she’s not going anywhere.” Libby was not about to be swayed.
“I agree,” said Tahinah, “it wouldn’t solve anything. The veil would still be in the same state and whoever is after you would assume you were still here. We might very well be in more danger if you leave.”
“So what should I do?” I waited for a reply, but none came, “And can anyone tell me why someone is targeting me?”
Libby sat at the table; Tahinah poured coffee for everyone before taking her seat.
“There is so much work to do. We should have started when you were twelve, then none of this would be happening.” I thought she was laying the blame on my mother, for the kidnapping and everything else that was going on.
“It’s not her fault, she did what she thought was right,” I said, defending her.
“I know. The secret we have been protecting for all these generations is what puts you in danger. The prophecy gives us certain clues to follow, but it is just a beginning. Each daughter has also received her own role in the prophecy. The first prophecy was only an indication of what was to follow and the tasks we had to perform. We all hoped you would have received your part of the prophecy by now, and this would be finished.” She was staring at me, looking into my eyes as if I had a secret hidden inside. I knew there was none.
“My fear now is that you still haven’t received your part of the prophecy, and worse than that, you don’t seem to have any useful gifts that will enable you to receive the prophecy it.”
“She has one gift,” Phoenix said as he looked at me and bit his lip. I could see he was hesitating, but I was interested to see where this was going.
“Psyche dreams. She already has the dream magick, she is the dreamer of dreams. She hasn’t had the right dream yet, but she does have the right sort of dreams.”
Everyone looked at Phoenix. Obviously, Libby didn’t have the sole rights on secret keeping. No, it appeared they were selling franchises.
“Phoenix, how do you know this? Why have you not said anything?” Tahinah inquired. I saw her acting like his mother for the first time.
Phoenix looked at Libby, who was also waiting for an answer. He let out a deep sigh and began to explain.
“I dream the same dreams as Psyche. They’re not my dreams, she pulls me in and makes me part of them. I know they’re Psyche’s dreams.”
“How can you know this for sure?” Libby asked, trying to get the answers we all sought.
“I didn’t know until I met her and I wasn’t completely sure until recently. I have always been drawn into Psyche’s dreams; she’s been doing this ever since… well, for as long as I can remember, anyway.”
“But they could be your dreams, Phoenix. Maybe you just imagine it’s Psyche. It’s possible that you’ve placed her in your dreams, now that you’ve met,” argued Libby.
“I don’t dream. I don’t need to dream. It’s different for me.” Phoenix made the statement as if it were an indisputable fact. Both women stopped questioning him and looked at me. What he said had satisfied them, but I wanted to hear more.
“I think he might be right,” I said. So much for not keeping secrets. “But I can’t be sure; how can I? Someone is always in my dreams; maybe it’s Phoenix and maybe it’s no one important.”
“Phoenix, tell us about Psyche’s dreams last night,” said Tahinah.
“Well, actually Psyche didn’t dream last night,” I nodded, he was right. “But the night before, she did.” Phoenix proceeded to describe my dream in great detail.
Now I was blushing. I shot him a look that I hoped was filled with malice or daggers or something. I finally admitted, “He has shared my dreams. No one could have guessed those details and he has no reason to lie that I’m aware of.” I thought about my dreams, someone had always been there. “I think he has always been there, but I don’t know for sure. I thought maybe I just wanted a face for my rescuer.” Even as I tried to convince myself otherwise, I knew I was wrong. “Phoenix has always been in my dreams.”
“Psyche’s dreams are like sitting in a theatre, they’re so vivid and real; there is no way I’m wrong about this.” Phoenix said. He was suddenly very certain about his presence in my dreams.
“This is an interesting turn, I wasn’t expecting so much.” Libby said, not really speaking to anyone at that particular moment.
Phoenix reached across the table and took my hand. It was warmer than mine but my entire body felt cold. “I’m sorry, Psyche; I didn’t want to tell you like this. I didn’t really know how to tell you, but this is the wrong way.”
A tear ran down my cheek. As much as I liked Phoenix, I didn’t want him knowing all my secrets. Dreams are sacred and private. My deepest desires and my greatest fears lay raw and naked and Phoenix had seen all of them. I couldn’t handle anymore confessions today. I wanted no more truth. I stood up and ran to my room.
The tears flowed freely. I didn’t sob; I wasn’t sad, but I felt betrayed and the tears continued to flow. Phoenix came to my bedroom door. I didn’t acknowledge him or ask him to come in, but he did anyway. He sat on the side of the bed and put his hand on my waist.
“It’s not so bad, is it? It’s kind of fun, really. I mean, where else am I going to see a pink palace?”
“But you know things you shouldn’t! You’ve seen things, private things. Things I wouldn’t show you even if you begged!”
“I know, but whenever you really don’t want me to see something, everything goes dark and misty. I don’t see the things you really don’t want me to see.”
“Does it go misty often?”
“No. almost never. It has a few times, but, Psyche, there are other things I should tell you. Now is not the time. Just know that you can trust me. Your secrets are my secrets, everything is safe with me.”
Chapter 10 ~ CHARMED
I sulked for hours, alone in my room, well aware that it benefited no one, especially me. I couldn’t shake the feeling that I had been betrayed; nor could I get my mind around everything that had happened in the past few days. I could hear the hum of voices as the women prepared the charms. If I waited long enough, they might leave and I would only have to face Libby.
While I wanted to avoid them and save myself further humiliation, I decided to get over it. Swallowing my pride, I left the relative safety of my room and entered the kitchen. It was empty, but I was sure I’d heard people talking. Perhaps the reality was that I was actually teetering on the brink of insanity. It would explain so much.
Libby, Tahinah, Ruben, Phoenix and Navarre walked in through the door to find me poking and pinching my arm. If it were a dream, I wanted to wake up; but if I were insane? Well, that was an entirely different problem.
Ruben nodded and Tahinah smiled, “Greetings, Psyche.” No one else spoke. Libby ignored me and Phoenix lowered his head, avoiding eye cont
act. Navarre, on the other hand, shrugged and sat beside me at the table.
“They’ll get over it,” he whispered. I realised then, that no one had really done anything wrong. Phoenix hadn’t forced his way into my dreams, Libby didn’t create the prophecy and Tahinah hadn’t sent the beast after me. I actually had no reason to be angry, but they had every right to be angry with me.
Tahinah moved to light a few candles and a warm glow filled the room. Normally, I had my own candle and carried it from place to place, although it barely provided enough light. Shared candles merely created more shadows, but candlelight soothes the soul like nothing else. As the room filled with golden light and the smell of honeyed wax, I felt the tension dissolve into a sugary sweetness. Ruben seemed a little tense, but it was unrelated to anything I had done.
Libby beckoned me to her side and handed me a small, empty bowl. “Everything on the table is known to hold properties for protection. What you choose to include in your charm is up to you.” I gazed at the containers scattered across the table — little bowls and jars filled with beads, gems and stones. Some bundles of herbs lay in the centre of the table with small pieces of fabric, leather cord and thread.
“There are several ways to make a protection charm,” Libby continued. “You can simply tie everything up in a bundle or create something wearable. Some crystals will suit you better than others. Let them choose you and we’ll work with those.”
“Let them choose me?” I said. “How does that work?”
“You will feel it in your hands or in your heart. You’ll know when you have found the right one,” Libby replied.
“Embrace the intention in your heart,” added Tahinah.
“Try holding your hand over the jars. If you feel nothing, then move on. You might feel heat or a slight tingle in your fingers, but you should feel something. Herbs will call you if the scent is particularly strong,” Libby instructed. Everyone offered more words of advice.