“It’s nice to meet you. Let’s see that horse now, shall we?”
I nod and she walks off, leaving Kyle with me. He takes my hand and helps me from the truck. And I glare up at him. He could have at least warned me he was taking me to his lover’s house. Or ex lover. Or his love. There’s something between them, I’m just not totally sure what yet.
Still, he could have given me a head’s up that it would get weird.
With the solid ground under my feet, I walk toward the trailer as Emma opens the back and lowers the ramp.
“Oh, darlin,” she breathes out on a sigh as she walks up and in with the horse. The horse looks over at her with the saddest ears I’ve ever seen. The horse’s ears are just hanging to the sides, sagging there like she doesn’t even have the energy to keep them upright.
“She was lying down,” Kyle’s telling Emma, who clicks her tongue.
“Not good. I’ll get her fed. Need pictures?” she asks as she backs the horse down the ramp slowly with words of encouragement.
“Pictures would be good, just to cover my ass.” Kyle seems sheepish and I pull my phone from my pocket.
“Why kind of pictures?” I ask him. Emma walks over to me as the horse stands there, her head lowered and her breathing labored. She lifts my phone and talks in a lowered voice.
“Like this, show her ribs, her hips. Try a few from the sides, a few from behind, the front, every angle you can. The more detail, the better.” She gives me that smile and a quick, one arm around my shoulders hug. “Thanks. I’m going to get her some mash, okay?” She thumbs up Kyle who nods and rubs the horse’s neck.
With my task realized, I take pictures from every angle that I can to show how bad of shape the horse is in. Kyle is talking quietly to her and I feel bad for him. I know this is killing him; he’s got such a soft spot for animals.
So I take my phone to him to let him see the images. “I got some good ones,” I say as I offer him the phone. But he doesn’t take it. Instead, he fixes me with a serious expression.
“I trust you,” He says and my heart does a backflip in my chest. Don’t do that, I want to tell him. Don’t trust me. I’ll let you down. I’m not the kind of person who can always come through. Don’t give me the power to hurt you, please. I don’t want the responsibility.
Seeing the ache in his eyes, I pull him into a hug.
“Emma seems capable,” I say softly as his arms come around me. “The horse will pull through, I’m sure of it.” To my surprise, I realize I mean it. If anyone can bring this sad animal around, I’m betting it’s Emma. Not that Kyle can’t or won’t just that she seems dedicated and amazing.
As if on cue, Emma walks up, her green eyes shifting from me to Kyle as I awkwardly pull away from him.
She’s holding an odd bag that she loops around the horse’s nose and buckles it behind her ears. “Dad’s old recipe,” She tells me in a stage whisper. “Makes them right as rain pretty quick.”
“What’s in it?” I ask, curious.
“Egg, molasses, oats, nutritive pellets, and a heavy duty vitamin mixture. A load of calories and sugars to get her back to normal.” Emma gives me a knowing grin. “So, Victoria, do you like horses? Or just handsome hunks who save them?” She says, needling her elbow into Kyle’s side.
“Oh, he’s just helping my dog.” I don’t want her to get the wrong idea or ruin his chances with her. It’s obvious there’s something between them, and I don’t want to be in the way of that. “But I do like horses,” I say as her expression shifts into something unreadable for an instant before her exuberant smile returns.
“So let’s get this little lady into a pasture to finish her treat before she grazes. You can meet some of the pals she’ll have once she feels better.” Emma takes my hand and the horse’s halter in her other hand and we walk through the grass lawn toward some open pastures with a few horses speckling the green fields.
Chapter 16
Kyle
It’s a strange feeling to see Emma hand in hand with Victoria as she leads the mare off toward a better life. I’d loved Emma for years. I’d worked alongside her late father before he passed away.
Emma had been understandably distraught after losing him, but she’d shouldered the burden of her duty to the home and the ranch and she’d carried on the treasured, sought after bloodlines her father and his father before that had so carefully cultivated.
But, though I’d loved her, Kieran had shoved his way into her life. He’d tried every dirty trick in the book to get her to sell her treasured family farm so he could build some shitty apartments, I’m sure, so he could slumlord like the douche he is.
But in the end, she’d somehow fallen in love with him.
But now, as I see her walking shoulder to shoulder with Victoria, I realize that clearly she’d never felt the same for me as I’d felt for her. While I’d seen her vulnerable, I’d never seen her nearly as vulnerable as I’d seen Victoria.
In such a short time, it feels like I’ve found a stronger connection with her than I ever expected or had with Emma.
Which is going to make it more painful when she walks out of my life.
I open the truck door to find Jax laying on the passenger seat with his head hanging off the edge so he can touch Sentinel with his nose. Sentinel, meanwhile, is sound asleep, his breathing easy and not at all labored or pained.
Good. It means the dose of pain meds I’d given him this morning were sufficient.
My stomach grumbles and I remember that I’m supposed to do some shopping for the mother in law. I wonder if she’d mind if I left her here while I go. I don’t assume she’ll want to go with, and I do know that Emma will keep her busy if she’s here.
Emma is just like that. She’ll find fun or chores or both to keep her new friend busy. But the look in Victoria’s eyes when we’d opened the truck door when we got here… Damn. She knows something. I’m not an idiot. I’m sure they’re off talking about me. And I know Emma is pushing us together even as Victoria pushes back in her own timid, soft way.
They’re a fascinating pair.
Sentinel wakes and Jax sniffs at him. Then he starts in licking his new friend’s face like he’s taking care of him. “Don’t get too attached,” I say softly, ever reminding myself that they will leave. It’s unlike Jax to pay any attention to other people or animals. Part of his personality is that he’s a very tunnel vision oriented animal.
He sees the task. He does the task. He doesn’t have time for other things, he doesn’t care about other dogs, and he’s generally not one to listen to other people.
But his ears perk every time Victoria speaks.
“Hey.”
I turn, seeing Victoria. But Emma is nowhere to be seen. Victoria reaches past me to pet Sentinel whose tail begins to thump softly. She’s so close to me I can smell her clean hair, her fragrant heat and feel the warmth radiating off her skin.
It’s fucking intoxicating. Every touch is torture at this point. Even her hug, her gentle embrace is leaving my body lost and confused. I want her. I need her. I crave her in a way I’ve never experienced before.
But she’s not mine. And I’m pretty sure she still hates me.
As if she knows I’m curious, she says, “Emma is settling the new mare in.” Her brown eyes meet mine and I know I’m not going to like what comes next. “You could have told me,” she says, her body moving closer to mine as she inches between me and the open door.
“Told you what?” I ask. But I’ve got a pretty good idea what she’s asking me.
And the expression on her face tells me she knows it too. “About you and Emma. About Emma and Kieran.”
The mention of his name is enough to make my whole body tense up. Victoria’s eyes assess me, my stance and posture, and the change before meeting mine again. “Why do you hate him?” she asks softly, her voice barely above a whisper.
I’m surprised she got all of that information from my reaction to his name. “He killed my father,” I
say, the words burning like bitter acid on my tongue.
“What?” she asks, her face filled with shock.
“Kieran is my brother,” I clarify so it’s less of a shocking bit of information. It’s not like he’s a total stranger who walked in, shot my dad and ran off.
“What happened?” she asks, her eyes slashing back and forth over mine as her whole body stills. The wind kicks up and I smell sweet grasses, horses, and a hint of spring.
I shake my head, feeling that same old burning rage churning in my guts. “I don’t want to talk about it,” I say.
She studies me a moment more, her eyes searching mine as if she’s reading the answer there. Finally, she dips her head in a nod. “Okay,” she says, her tone gentle. “Are you ready to go?” she asks and I feel her concern in every syllable. But it’s not overbearing. She’s not baby talking me. She’s not acting weird, merely understanding and empathetic.
It’s a welcome attitude. Perhaps her struggle and her painful past have made her better equipped to handle these kinds of heartbreak.
“I am,” I say, looking over at the house. Emma has my number. If she needs anything, she knows she can text me. And I don’t want to be here when Kieran gets home from work.
I help Victoria into the truck before walking around to my side.
When I’m in and settled, Victoria opens her mouth as if to speak, but stops. And I hesitate, sensing it’s an important conversation. She peeks at me out of the corner of her eyes, then seems to decide to give it a go, albeit with more than a hint of fear in her voice.
“Do you love her?”
Chapter 17
Victoria
There’s an odd distance between us as he pulls down the driveway. I wonder if it’s because I asked if he loves her. Or maybe it’s because he said yes.
It hurts to hear that he does, but I’m not really sure why. I mean, it’s not like he and I are falling in love. I mean, he’s not a bad person, but there are just too many differences between us.
Still, it aches right behind my ribs.
We’re hardly beyond the house when a truck rips into the drive. I feel Kyle tense up beside me. He hits the breaks and the other truck halts before us, blocking our escape. My heart begins to thunder in my chest as I glance over at Kyle.
His jaw is rippling like he’s clenching his teeth and I see muscles bunching up under his shirt. He’s tense and angry, and I know why the second the other guy gets out of the truck. The family resemblance between them is unmistakable.
This is the brother. The one Kyle feels killed his father and stole the love of his life. What a twisted shit storm.
The brother, Kieran, stops beside Kyle’s door and I wait, holding my breath. Kyle stares forward, refusing to even look at his brother or lower the window. And something in me rears up, some long dead fighter in me is ready to do battle.
I open my door and slide out to the dirt road. With quick steps, I circle the front of the truck and shove my hand toward the new guy.
“I’m Victoria,” I say as he looks me up and down, his eyes confused. I know he’s sizing me up, but I don’t give a damn. “We were here dropping off a sick horse with Emma. Now we’re going.” My voice is firm.
Kieran glances from me to his brother, who’s now opening the door and getting out. And Kieran’s gaze sweeps back to me, a sudden smile lighting up his harsh features. He elbows an unimpressed Kyle, who steps back a pace, his impassive features offering nothing to his feelings. Nothing but tight control as he looks past his brother, past me, past this moment.
“She’s cute,” Kieran says, and I see Kyle lock on him with a stare that’s all silent threats. And Kieran’s quick to amend. “Jesus, man. Can we pretend for a second that we’re brothers? That I’m trying to show you I’m glad you found someone?”
“I’m just a friend,” I say to Kieran in my chilliest voice. How dare he talk about me like I’m not even here?
“I’m sorry,” Kieran says, his voice suddenly tired. And I get it. He’s trying – however poorly – to repair whatever happened between him and his brother. But some things can’t be forgiven. I know that. And Kieran should know that.
“No worries,” I say, willing to give him the benefit of the doubt this time. But part of me wants to make sure I castrate him if he ever hurts Emma. She’s such a sweet girl, inside and out, I don’t want anyone to hurt her.
Hell, she’s the kind of person I wish I could call friend. There’s something so infectious about how happy she is despite the rough life she’s had that I admire. I wish I could be like her, I wish I could be okay even though life has been hard.
Kieran looks at me suddenly like he’s seeing me for the first time. And I realize why. He knows that I’m leverage against his brother. I can get him to change his mind, in Kieran’s eyes. I brace myself for the manipulation coming next, but Kieran suddenly powers down.
“Need help with anything?” he asks his brother, who’s still ignoring him like a stoic gargoyle.
Reeling from shock that he didn’t do what I expected, I answer for Kyle. “Move your truck? We’ve got a ton of stuff to do.”
Kieran nods, then glances at his brother again. “I’d still like to buy you that drink,” he says, and I sense very real emotion behind the words. But the offer of an olive branch seems to fall on deaf ears as Kyle continues to ignore him.
After a moment, Kieran sighs and heads back to his truck. I wave and head back to my side as Kyle settles back into the driver’s seat. We pass one another on the dirt road and I glance at Kyle. His jaw is working and I know he’s struggling with some inner demons.
After a moment, though, he turns to me. “Thank you,” he says, his voice tight with anger that I know isn’t directed at me.
I struggle internally. Part of me wants to believe that Kieran is being a good guy. I mean, he saw he could use me against Kyle, but he didn’t take the chance. He said the wrong things, sure, but they seemed like they were coming from a good place.
And I’m even more curious about whatever happened with their father.
Clearly it wasn’t actual murder. Or I assume Kieran would be in jail. But I have a feeling it’s some roundabout responsibility. Still, it’s none of my business.
“You’re allowed to be angry,” I say softly to no one in particular. “No matter what happened, or how. Your emotions have validity.” The words are what I have wished time and again that someone might say to me. Because they’re right and I know they are, but it’s hard to accept them when you’re the one saying them. From someone else’s lips, they feel like they have more weight, more cogency.
And suddenly, I feel tears crowding, but I push them back. I put myself out there, both in what I’ve said to Kyle, but when I got out of the truck. I inserted myself into something I could have hidden from. Something I could have run from because it’s not my problem.
I stood up for someone. I took power in a situation. I wasn’t timid or scared, I actually fucking stood my ground in defense of a friend.
A friend.
Chapter 18
Kyle
I’d thought that stocking the fridge in the mother in law might drive a wedge between us, but Victoria has still asked to join me for every meal, and she even tried her hand at cooking. But with every passing day, Sentinel heals and regains strength.
He’s still not well enough to travel. As it is, his stitches seem to be straining and I worry I’ll have to restitch him. Too much activity will absolutely make them pop. But his ribs are mending. The X-ray I’d retaken show the bones coming together very well and the beginning of regrowth.
I’ve been on Victoria, reminding her to make sure he takes it easy. Now that he’s doing better, she’s asked if he can sleep beside her bed. I told her I’d talk to her about it tonight, over dinner.
After some work, I realized that I’d left her home with full access to my house all day. And with her truck available. It’s odd that I’ve never let even women I’m sleeping with such un
fettered access to my personal space, but this girl who could be some criminal can come and go as she pleases.
“So how is the little lady today?” I hear Sam ask. And I hear Victoria respond.
“Good. Is Kyle here?” she asks, her sweet voice carrying back here. Sam responds as I try to focus on the little lamb on the table before me. In a moment the air becomes statically charged and I know I’m not alone anymore.
But like she had that first day, Victoria is quiet and lets me focus. Still, every part of me wants to zero in on her. Before me, the lamb lets out a little protesting bleat.
“Almost done,” I tell him as I snip the end of the stitches I’d put in his flank. I scoop him off the table and set him on the floor. I glance at Victoria and see her face is lit up with joy as she looks at the little lamb wandering around, bleating.
“He’s so cute!” She says, looking up at me.
And I feel like I’ve been kicked in the gut. She’s not the same scared, panicky girl I’d met only a week before. With every passing day, she calms down. She stops looking over her shoulder. She doesn’t see ghosts. Well, not as much, at least.
The part that surprises me, though, is that she hasn’t pushed me to tell her more about my father and Kieran.
You’re allowed to be angry. No matter what happened, or how. Your emotions have validity.
“Yeah,” I say, acknowledging her, “He tangled with a big mean fence. So a couple quick stitches and some shots.”
“Awww,” she says, squatting down to pet him. He leans on her, his little tail going nuts twitching back and forth.
“Is everything okay?” I ask, needing to know that she and Sentinel are alright. She beams up at me with a happy grin that’s an answer all in itself.
“Yep!” She sounds so happy and upbeat it warms my soul. “You about done?” she asks and I glance at the clock. It’s time to head out. Where did the day go?
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