by Kyle Wilson
Table of Contents
Chapter 1: From Trauma and Tragedy – A Single Mom’s Path to Success and Significance
Heather Self
Chapter 2: The Fish That Swim In Rectangles
Robert J. Ott
Chapter 3: Mayday! Mayday! From Helping Real Estate Syndicators Raise 100s of Millions to Asking One Question: Why?
Mauricio J. Rauld, Esq.
Chapter 4: From Quitting to Significance
Brian Brault
Chapter 5: The Night My Future Knocked on The Door
Eric Bowlin
Chapter 6: A Story of Heartache, Healing, and Hope
Jenny Landon
Chapter 7: Death to Life – Front Row Seats to Miracles
Kyle Hoffman
Chapter 8: Blindly Following Financial Professionals to Courageously Disrupting the Financial Industry
Kurtis Drake
Chapter 9: The Gift of Life Is to Be Cherished
Heather S. Coombes
Chapter 10: The Road Less Traveled to Self-Made Millionaire by the Age of 30
Andrew Jarrett
Chapter 11: The Third Time’s the Charm
Jeff Wimmer
Chapter 12: Fighting Demons – A Simple Way to Help Anyone With Chronic Pain, Stress, and Anxiety
Dr. Amy Novotny
Chapter 13: The Five Reasons People Quit (And What to Do About It)
Tom Krol
Chapter 14: Leaving My Pack
Robert D. Burr
Chapter 15: Lessons From a Fellow Warrior – Are You Sitting in the Stands…or Standing in the Arena?
Keeley Hubbard
Chapter 16: Persevering in Challenging Times
Kyle Wilson
Chapter 17: The System Is Rigged To Fail You
Jeff Thornton
Chapter 18: Where Your “STOP” Becomes Your “Start!”
Crystal Hinojosa
Chapter 19: From Rock Bottom to Sharing World-Class Stages with Top Achievers
Robert J. Moore
Chapter 20: Community College Drop Out to Multimillion Dollar Real Estate Fund Manager
Brad Niebuhr
Chapter 21: Because Others Gave, I Give
Tami Damian
Chapter 22: The Man Who Owned 100 Homes but Had No Bed to Sleep In
Eric Luneborg
Chapter 23: One Rock at a Time
Greg Zlevor
Chapter 24: The Meaning and Purpose of Life
Lisa Haisha
Chapter 25: It’s Okay If You’re Broke, Homeless, Sued, and Your Car Catches Fire – You Will Still Succeed
Will Heybruck
Chapter 26: How My Entrepreneurial Passion Led Me to Belize
David Kafka
Chapter 27: Breathe and Love Unconditionally
Cassie Bullock
Chapter 28: From Playing It Safe to Pursuing My Passion
James Miles
Chapter 29: Rise from Obscurity
Gary L. Hammond
Chapter 30: The Power of Being Seen – How I Turn “Being Different” to My “Superhuman Power”
Sophia Stavron
Chapter 31: I Knew Everything. I Lost Almost Everything.
Howard Pierpont
Chapter 32: The Hot Shot Banker Who Lost Everything, Restarted with $525,000 in Debt, Then Became a Millionaire
Nick Aalerud
Chapter 33: Stupid Little Girl to Commercial Pilot
Tara Hamilton Howard
Chapter 34: Capitalize on Your Challenges and Start Capital Hacking
Josh McCallen
Chapter 35: Work Harder Not Smarter
Nunzio D. Fontana
Chapter 36: Climbing Out of the Pit of Poverty Thinking to Powerful Business Owner and Mentor
Angel Chandler
Chapter 37: From Working in the Sugarcane Fields and Going through 5 Bankruptcies to Sharing Lessons on the Stage
Ravin S. Papiah
Chapter 38: Never Stop Never Stopping!
Jesse LeBeau
Chapter 39: Never Give Up
Todd Stottlemyre
DON'T QUIT
When things go wrong, as they sometimes will,
When the road you're trudging seems all uphill,
When the funds are low and the debts are high,
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh,
When care is pressing you down a bit,
Rest, if you must, but don't you quit.
Life is queer with its twists and turns,
As every one of us sometimes learns,
And many a failure turns about
When he might have won had he stuck it out;
Don't give up though the pace seems slow–
You may succeed with another blow.
Often the goal is nearer than
It seems to a faint and faltering man.
Often the struggler has given up,
When he might have captured the victor's cup.
And he learned too late when the night slipped down,
How close he was to the golden crown.
Success is failure turned inside out―
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt,
And you never can tell how close you are,
It may be near when it seems so far;
So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit―
It's when things seem worst that you must not quit.
– Author unknown
CHAPTER 1
From Trauma and Tragedy
A Single Mom’s Path to Success and Significance
by Heather Self
“G od, please take me and spare my babies.” I pleaded out loud with a quivering voice as three military-grade assault rifles were pointed at my head.
It was almost as if everything became muffled, the deep voices yelling, “Get down!”, “I’ll kill you!” It seemed as if I was hearing them from underwater. I had a ringing in my ears that sounded like a continuous gong vibrating throughout my body.
The day started like so many other warm summer days in Tennessee. My oldest son, Matthew, nine years old at the time, was enjoying Cub Scout camp. My oldest daughter Rayna (11) and I were at home getting “the littles,” as we affectionately called them, into the bath. Kendall (4) was making bubbles as I fastened Nate (2) into his bath seat. Just as I turned the water off, the phone rang. I had Rayna sit with the littles as I ran to grab the phone.
Turning the corner of the hallway, I came face to face with an M-16, then another, then another. Three strangers were in my house, dressed in all black, bandanas covering all but their eyes. I was forced onto the couch. Everything seemed to go distant.
Hearing the commotion, Rayna peeked out from the bathroom, two of the guns pointed at her. As soon as I saw the fear in her eyes, everything that was distant became real again. A feeling of helplessness came over me. I started pleading with the gunmen to let her come to me. Thankfully, they did. As she sat next to me, I whispered “cover your ears,” as I guided her head, then her body behind me. I didn’t want her to see or hear anything more than she already had. I recognized that I had no control over their actions.
I could only help frame the situation to influence my daughter’s perception.
“This will be over soon,” I whispered. “How about we all go out for ice cream later?” I asked. I did anything I could to make her feel like there would be a later. I chose to focus on what I could control.
I remember questioning…So, this is how I die? This wasn’t the first time I had stared death in the face. Almost a decade earlier, I was diagnosed with Guillain-Barré Syndrome (GBS), which left me fighting for my life. I became paralyzed and was only able to breathe with the help of an intubation tube. If I survived that, perhaps I could survive this too.
Suddenly, I heard tires rolling up my gravel driveway. I looked out the front window in fear that it was my son returning from camp. The window was just feet from where we were being held captive. The next thing I knew, the gunmen
ran out the back door. They were gone. It was over. We were alive. As it turned out, the car was just a lost driver looking for a place to turn around. I can’t help but think this was no accident; my prayers had been answered.
This was another “second chance” at life for me. I had survived domestic violence years earlier. The abuse left me with nothing. I lost my apartment, my car, my job, and almost my life while simultaneously learning I was expecting my second child. I ended up on welfare to be able to provide the very basics for my growing family. I remember many times I’d have to choose between food and electricity. Without the love and support of my family, I’m not sure we would have survived.
During my pregnancy, I was enrolled in classes provided by the state to all welfare recipients. Soon after giving birth, I was offered the opportunity to teach those classes. I learned that most people on welfare don’t want to be.
I had a preconceived notion that people were abusing the system. That may be true in some cases, but the women and men I encountered were just trying to play the difficult hand they were dealt. Domestic violence played a big role in their situations, much like it did in mine. I decided to take on a more active role. I went on to get a counseling certification in order to help more people. I worked in partnership with the state for many years. My goal was to empower women, to give them back their choices, the choices that had been ripped from them along with their dignity. Every day I taught, I learned.
My next goal in life was to become a homeowner. In the spring of 2000, I received a phone call. “Heather, this is Chris with Habitat for Humanity. We would like to offer you the opportunity to buy our next home.” I was overwhelmed with gratitude. I had worked so hard to stabilize my life, for me, but especially for my children. Could this really be happening? I knew I would achieve my next goal of homeownership, but I had no idea it would be this way. I was reminded that you should remain firm in your goals but be flexible in how you achieve them.
For the next few months, I was at the build site swinging hammers, painting walls, and carrying boards. I was overcome with gratitude. All those incredible people were there for me and my children. It was a community building a home for a single mom, a survivor. Soon, the project was completed, and the home was dedicated to us. It was a beautiful moment that I will not soon forget. Finally, we had a place of our own to call home. That house gave us so much and taught me about gratitude, community, and love. This was a blessing for so many years.
After the home invasion, things changed. My home was no longer a place of safety. I immediately began to suffer the effects of PTSD. The little sleep I did get was filled with nightmares and reenactments of the event. I was constantly locking doors and couldn’t go outside to play with the kids. I became hyper-vigilant, always checking my surroundings and knowing where the exits were in any room. I lived in a heightened state of awareness. When the home invasion occurred, I lost the possibility of feeling safe in the one place people should be able to take refuge from the world, their home.
I continued to work hard and rebuild again. This time I was rebuilding myself emotionally and mentally. I believe that things happen for a reason. The abuse led me to help transition hundreds of VICTIMS of domestic violence into SURVIVORS of domestic violence. Rebuilding my physical and mental capabilities after the GBS led me to trust in myself. If I could start from scratch at 23 and learn how to walk again, read again, and write again, I could certainly take this devastating situation and make it matter.
Encounters with trauma and tragedy are what shape us as people. They can either tear us down or cause us to soar. You have the power to choose your outcome and what you do with it. It’s not just what we choose to learn from those experiences that matter, it’s what we choose to teach others in order to create significance.
I went on to start the first neighborhood watch program in our area. My mission was to take the “hood” out and put the “neighbor” back into our neighborhood. Crime dropped significantly, and we all started to feel safe again. Neighbors were inviting kids over for homemade cookies after school and people were bringing food to neighbors in need. It was beautiful to watch the community come together again, just like they had when the home was first built.
Just before my 29th birthday, the realization hit me. I was only doing big things in reaction to trauma. I became restless with this thought. If I could take this tenacity and shed my personal fear of failure, I could accomplish anything. I learned from Jim Rohn, “Don’t wish it was easier, wish you were better.” So, I really started digging into becoming better. It was clear to me that my life was not meant to be easy. I spent a lot of time studying the lessons of the great motivators like Tony Robbins, Brian Tracy, and Zig Ziglar. Their words filled me with hope and seemed to silence the fear. I was going to make a change. I wasn’t going to allow anyone or anything to stop me from becoming an entrepreneur.
Real estate seemed to be a natural fit. I had already discovered my passion for providing people with a safe place to call their own. Late one night I heard a commanding voice from the other room. “You can invest in real estate with no money down and with no credit.” God, is that you? (I say jokingly.) I entered the living room to see Carlton Sheets pitching his system. I remember thinking, This is perfect. No money, no credit, finally, something I qualify for. They were selling his system on a financing plan, so without hesitation, I picked up the phone and dialed the 800 number. I had no idea how I was going to pay for it, but I knew if I didn’t take this risk, nothing would change. I was at that pivotal moment in life where the pain of staying the same was greater than the fear of changing. I felt like a kid with the anticipation of Christmas morning. Weeks later, it arrived. I listened to every tape, read every document, and did nothing but study real estate. I learned to analyze market cycles, and over the course of a year, I took on a few rental properties to manage. Some say I took to real estate like a duck does to water.
I remember reading: if you want to do something, reach out to someone who’s already doing it successfully. I didn’t personally know any real estate investors at the time. So, while I was contemplating my next steps, I logged into Facebook. It was just becoming popular at the time. The first thing I saw was, “People You May Know” followed by a picture of Greg. After realizing we graduated high school together, I clicked on his profile. His listed occupation was “Real Estate Investor.” I thought to myself, This can’t be an accident. So, I took a chance and reached out. Greg soon introduced me to Rich Dad Poor Dad . I had never heard of Robert Kiyosaki at the time, but I quickly became enthralled with his concept of money. This changed everything for me as it has for so many other investors.
A couple years later, Greg and I were happily married. We quickly figured out how to leverage each other’s strengths and went on to build the first of many companies. In the beginning, I was particularly interested in wholesaling because it could generate cash quickly. We jumped right in and profited $80,000 in our first quarter. It would have taken me almost three years to replicate that income from a job. We had made our first million just a couple of years in. I knew at that point there was no turning back. Together we have been involved in over 600 real estate deals in the matter of a few years. We have owned upwards of 60 single-family rental homes at one time and flipped several hundred houses. We now strive to provide housing for the senior population.
I never really intended on becoming a multimillionaire, but I quickly realized that the more money I made, the more people I could help. I had been in so many situations in my life where I felt as though I had no control. Becoming an entrepreneur gave me my choices back. I live my life on my terms and enjoy every moment I’m given. I spend a lot of time helping other women find their purpose, gain confidence, and take massive action to create their new realities.
A friend and mentor, Russell Gray from The Real Estate Guys Radio Show , taught me a simple phrase: “Be who you’re becoming.” This statement was so impactful to me. It gave me permission to be confi
dent when I was unsure and to be comfortable in uncomfortable situations. I could simply act like the person I wanted to be. I now teach that concept to everyone who will listen.
Everybody has a story, a path filled with winding roads, peaks, and valleys. It’s important to embrace your lessons and remember not to compare your Chapter 1 with someone else’s Chapter 20. Not everyone is given the same opportunities in life, but with persistence, courage, and faith you can begin to create those opportunities that are needed to fulfill your definition of success; whether it be wealth, love, human connection, friendships, inspiring others, or simply being happy.
Yes, I am strong, but only because I have been weak. I am smart, but only because I have been ignorant. I am brave only because I’ve known fear. Life has a way of bringing us through lessons we might not ever learn without tragedy. Through tragedy, tenacity is born. Through tenacity, triumph.
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TWEETABLE
Trauma and tragedy shape us: tearing us down or causing us to soar. You have the power to choose your outcome and what you do with it. It’s not just what we choose to learn from those experiences that matter, it’s what we choose to teach others in order to create significance.
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Heather Self is the co-founder of New Hope Senior Living. She is a serial entrepreneur who has been investing in real estate since 2009. She has partnered in over 600 real estate transactions including wholesales, fix and flips, rental properties, vacation homes, and private lending. Heather is a life skills teacher for the underprivileged and works closely with survivors of domestic violence. She has become a go-to mentor for female entrepreneurs, a mother of four, a real estate syndicator, and a world traveler. If you are interested in receiving “Heather’s Top 20 Tips for Success” email her at [email protected] . To connect with Heather, find her on Facebook @heather.l.self.5